Everything Changes
by pomatterpie
Summary: With a successful stage career and a reputation as one of the most respected show choir coaches in the country, Shelby Corcoran had almost everything she's ever wanted. Except for the baby she gave up 13 years ago. When Shelby unexpectedly runs into her daughter and the men she gave her to during a show choir competition one day, everything suddenly changes.
1. Chapter 1

Shelby Corcoran can count the number of times she's been left speechless with one hand. The time when she took her first bow in her Broadway debut. The moment she realized she won the Tony for Best Actress in a Musical, when years of sacrifices, rejection, and hard work finally paid off. The seconds after her beautiful baby girl was born.

And right now.

The time when she saw the baby she had given birth to— _her_ baby—for the first time in more than thirteen years. Except she wasn't a baby anymore. She was a young lady now—even more beautiful than Shelby could have imagined and even more talented than Shelby could have dreamed. She was on stage belting out Barbra Streisand's "Don't Rain On My Parade" almost flawlessly during a high school show choir competition in Akron, Ohio.

And Shelby knew instantly that she was hers.

"Wow," Jesse St. James said in awe as he peeled his eyes from the stage and turned to face his coach. "That song is _difficult_. I mean there's nowhere to breathe! And she sang it almost perfectly. I didn't hear a single note out of tune, did you? The entire team was good too. Vocal Adrenaline is better, of course, but that girl was amazing. Wasn't she, coach?"

Jesse continued to ramble but Shelby was floored. She felt a million things and nothing all at once. She was shocked, elated, heartbroken, and proud, _so_ proud. Overwhelmed, she opened and closed her mouth a few times but nothing came out.

She was completely and utterly speechless.

"Her name is Rachel Berry and she's a freshman from McKinley High School," Jesse relayed aloud as he read the Central Ohio Show Choir Sectional Competition program, his brows scrunching in confusion. "A freshman? And she's already that good. What do you think, Coach C? Should we be worried?" He asked again, now slightly concerned that his teacher wasn't answering him back.

Again, she said nothing. Shelby stared at Jesse seeing him talk but not hearing a single thing of what he was saying. All she could hear was the deafening pounding of her heart. She glanced at him then back to the stage where her daughter had just been.

"I just.. I.. She.." Shelby croaked out. She couldn't breathe. The room was spinning and she couldn't put her thoughts in order. She was losing fast control of the repressed emotions thirteen-years-in-the-making that was coursing through her.

Jesse was worried now. In the two years that he's known her, he's never seen his show choir coach flustered. Not once. She was usually the picture of perfect control. "Coach Corcoran, are you alright? You don't look too good. You look... kind of sick."

"That was my daughter," Shelby whispered to herself, continuing to ignore him, her focus faraway.

"What was that, Coach C? Whose daughter?"

Shelby shook her head furiously. "I have to see her. I need to see her," Shelby said again to herself while she began to gather her things.

She took a deep breath and attempted to slow down the pounding in her chest before turning to her student.

"I'm okay, Jesse. I promise. I just saw someone I know, and I really need to see her now. Are you going to be alright getting home?" She asked distractedly, looking around the theater for any signs of her daughter.

"Uh yeah, of course. I drove here so I can take myself home," Jesse said. "But are you sure you're alright, Shelby?"

Shelby immediately put on her show face in order to pacify his concerns and nodded. "Yes, I'm great. Thank you for coming with me, Jesse. We can compare notes later. I'll see you for rehearsal first thing Monday morning."

Before Jesse could even formulate a response, Shelby stood up abruptly and walked away before her student could ask her any more questions. She practically ran down the aisle, and pushed open the doors to get out of the auditorium.

Rachel was in this building. Her daughter was somewhere in this building. She started to walk with a ferocious purpose toward the direction of the classrooms where the teams were placed to wait during the competition... until she remembered the contract.

She stopped dead in her tracks and felt her heart plummet to her stomach. The contract that said that she couldn't see or speak to her daughter until she was 18, unless Rachel contacted her first.

Shelby mentally berated herself again for signing it for the millionth and one time in her life, suddenly feeling that all-too familiar and all-too consuming hurt in her heart anytime she thought about how she gave up her daughter.

Not knowing what to do and realizing that she had not thought things through, she turned around and began to walk toward the exit. She picked up her pace knowing that if she stayed any longer, she'd turned the building upside down in order to find Rachel and pull her into her arms.

Focused on getting a grip of all her raging emotions and not paying attention to what was happening around her, Shelby bumped right into a tall, slender back.

"Oh! I'm so sorry, I wasn't looking," Shelby began to apologize but stopped as soon as the man turned around, her heart racing once again as recognition sunk in. "Hiram?" she gasped.

"Shelby! There you are," he said, as if this isn't the first time he was seeing her in thirteen years. "I knew that was you who walked past me. I'd know you anywhere. Anyway, hi! I was looking for you. What are you doing here?"

"What? I.. Coach.. Rachel.. Chicago.. What?" Shelby rambled, shocked and unable to form a coherent sentence once again. _What. Was. Happening._ Shelby Corcoran, Broadway-Star-Turned-Show-Choir-Coach-And-High-School-Teacher usually had such strong command of the English language.

Hiram looked at her amused, not used to seeing her so unhinged. The woman even made childbirth look graceful. "What are you doing here, Shelby?" He asked once again. "Did you know Rachel was performing? Is that why you came?"

Shelby recoiled and took a step back, immediately feeling defensive. "No! Of course not! I'm a show choir coach at Carmel, I came to scope out the competition. I always do. I didn't know she would be here, I didn't know she would be performing. What are you doing here? I thought you lived in Chicago. I thought _she_ was supposed to be in Chicago. I thought—"

"Woah, woah, woah, Shelby, slow down." Hiram interrupted. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to accuse you, I was just shocked to see you that's all."

A few tense moments passed without either of them saying anything. "She looks just like me," Shelby finally whispered, feeling tears she didn't even know she had begun to shed roll down her cheeks. She wiped them away quickly, feeling betrayed by her emotions for the hundredth time that day.

Hiram's face softened and he gave her a kind smile. "She doesn't just _look_ like you, Shelby. She's exactly _like_ you too. In her tastes, her interests, her mannerisms. Even in her hopes and dreams, Shelby. She's _you_ through and through."

Shelby felt her heart swell with both happiness and despair at the same time. "Why are you telling me this?" She asked, choking back a sob. "You know I can't see her until she's 18. The contract was your idea."

A flash of hurt spread across Hiram's face and he paused for a moment. A few seconds passed by and Shelby, dejectedly thinking that she wouldn't get an answer, began to walk away.

Hiram quickly grabbed her arm. "Shelby, wait. I think we need to talk. There's something you need to know."

* * *

 **A/N: Not trying to reinvent the wheel. This is just my take on the Shelby/Rachel/Rachel's dad storyline. More to come!**


	2. Chapter 2

It's been more than thriteen years since Shelby last held her daughter in her arms. And it's been three days since Shelby first heard her daughter sing, effectively tilting her world off its axis.

Since the shock wore off, Shelby replayed Rachel's performance over and over again in her head, falling in love with her daughter a little bit more every time. Rachel was brilliant, Shelby thought. She was absolutely incredible. Rachel was her up on that stage.

 _She's you through and through,_ she heard Hiram's voice in her head. After Hiram stopped her from leaving at Sectionals he promised he would call her to schedule a time to meet and discuss everything. Shelby agreed, recognizing that a high school show choir competition wasn't the right time or place to discuss their daughter that she hasn't seen since birth. _Their_ daughter? Was she even allowed to think of Rachel as hers?

She also needed the time to gather her thoughts. Shelby didn't understand what was happening. How did she go from just doing her job to running into her daughter, the men she gave her to, and the past that she ever rarely let herself think about? She was just there to do work. Scoping out the competition was one of her favorite parts about her job. She got a thrill out of realizing that nobody could beat her and the team that she built and turned into national champions. She loved plotting all the ways she can win with her endless supply of innovative ideas. This year she was already thinking about ways to get her students to perform an entire routine on their hands. It would destroy the competition. But now, the competition was her daughter. Her baby girl that she had given up when she was only 23 years old.

* * *

 _Fourteen years ago:_

Shelby graduated a semester early from New York University. She was eager to start her career and put everything that she had learned to practice. However, life had other plans. Her dad got diagnosed with cancer the day after she graduated and the following week, Shelby hit pause on her journey to get on Broadway and moved back to her hometown of Lima, Ohio. It was more important to her to help out and be closer to her family.

One day as she was sitting in the hospital waiting for her dad to finish his latest round of chemotherapy, an ad in the paper she was reading caught her eye. A gay couple in town wanted to have a child and they were looking for a surrogate. The amount of money being offered was staggering. It was enough to help pay for her dad's cancer treatment and enough to also help her survive in New York City for at least two years. Shelby looked at the ad for hours that day.

She knew that her parents were already struggling to pay the medical bills. Although they never struggled to provide for Shelby and her sister Kim growing up, she also knew that they didn't have the expendable flow of income to finance cancer treatment without concern. They had spent a lot of money recently putting Shelby through school and refused to touch the savings they had for when Kim started college that fall. Shelby knew she needed to help. She was already working three jobs and it wasn't making a dent, so she called the number on the ad.

Shelby liked Hiram and Leroy Berry the moment she met them. Hiram was a up-and-coming lawyer working for the prominent law firm in town. He was practicing family law. Leroy was an already accomplished music professor at the State College right outside of Lima. Shelby took a liking to the way they interacted with each other and with her. They took the time to get to know Shelby, to answer all of her questions, to make her feel comfortable, and to make sure that this is what she really wanted. They never pressured her or acted like she was just a means to an end. They treated her with kindness and respect. They were loving and caring and silly and also appreciated music and art as much as she did. Shelby knew that they would be excellent fathers.

After Shelby got pregnant, Hiram and Leroy paid her the amount advertised in advance. A show of faith to demonstrate that they trusted her. Shelby didn't tell anyone what she was doing. Her family had enough on their plate, so she told them she got cast in the lead role of an Off-Broadway play that she auditioned for right before she graduated. It was true, she had gotten the part but had to turn it down to come back home to her family. Her dad had been accepted into a promising new clinical trial in Cleveland at the end of that summer. They were going to turn it down to pursue other, more affordable treatment options until Shelby told them about her new gig in New York and how much it paid. They were skeptical at first but Shelby insisted that that's how much leading roles, even those Off-Broadway, paid.

She hated lying to her parents, but she wanted her dad to get the best medical care possible. She _needed_ him to be okay. So, when her parents packed up to start the clinical trial in Cleveland, dropping her sister Kim off at college along the way, Shelby, also packed up to move back to "New York," which actually meant moving into the Berry household across the city.

Shelby wasn't going to lie. Being pregnant had not been easy. From the morning sickness to the insatiable cravings and the loneliness she felt having to go through pregnancy without her family and friends, it was at times frustrating and difficult. But at the same time, Shelby loved every single minute of it. From learning the baby's sex, to hearing her heartbeat and feeling her kick for the first time, Shelby was absolutely enchanted by the baby girl growing in her stomach. The closer she got to her due date in December, the more and more Shelby began to remind herself that this baby wasn't for her, it was for Hiram and Leroy, who had been doing everything they can to make her feel as comfortable as possible. They were attentive and supportive but also gave her the space to experience pregnancy on her own terms.

One night in late October when Shelby couldn't sleep, she walked down to the kitchen in search of the strawberry ice cream that she had been craving almost daily since she got pregnant. Hiram was sitting in the kitchen deep in a mess of papers spread across the kitchen island.

"Shelby, hi! Are you okay?" Hiram asked, looking up from his stacks of paper as she walked into the kitchen.

"Yeah I'm alright, I just couldn't sleep and I think me and the little one are craving something sweet again," Shelby explained as she placed her hand protectively over her stomach.

"Let me guess.. Strawberry ice cream?" Hiram chuckled. "Sit down, and let me get it for you. I was going to grab another glass of water anyway."

"You know us so well," Shelby smiled and sat acrosss from where Hiram was just working. She picked up a piece of paper and looked it over. "What's this? What's the case that you're working on?"

"Oh, um, those are papers for a custody agreement," Hiram said, placing the bowl of ice cream in front of Shelby and walked around the island to sit back down across from her. "I'm having trouble with this case because both parents want full-custody and nobody's willing to budge. They're both thinking about what they want and not what's best for the child. It's unfortunate."

"Oh," Shelby whispered, suddenly losing her appetite.

"You okay?" Hiram asked nervously. He had an idea of what Shelby was feeling. Him and Leroy could tell that she was getting attached to their baby and had been discussing what to do about it. They didn't want anyone to get hurt.

Shelby put her spoon down and looked into Hiram's concerned eyes. She knew they needed to have this conversation. She wanted to be honest. They were trusting her.

A few moments of silence passed and Shelby shifted anxiously in her seat. "I'm worried that I'm getting too attached," she confessed. "I swear, Hiram I'm trying really hard to compartmentalize and I tell myself every day, all day long that this baby is not mine and that she's all yours, but it's _hard_. I mean she's growing inside of me and she's a _part_ of me and God, she even kicks every time I listen to Barbra. I'm terrified. I'm starting to want her. And I hate myself for wanting her when I know that she's yours, but I can't help it. I don't know how I'm going to walk away. And the worst part is that I know I can't be her mom either. I'm only 23! I have plans. I have dreams. I have New York and Broadway — "

"Hey, hey, it's okay," Hiram interrupted before the young woman got herself too worked up. "I understand, and it's okay," He pushed his papers aside and reached out for her hand across the island and gave it a comforting squeeze. "We'll figure it out, okay? We can come up with a plan, some sort of agreement so that we're all protected somehow. It'll all be okay, Shelby. Do you trust us?"

And in that moment, Shelby did trust them. She knew what she had signed up for. She knew that the baby was always meant for them. She knew that they would be able to more than adequately provide for their child. More importantly, she knew that they would love her and protect her as much as she would. She also knew that she couldn't be a mom yet. As much as she loved the thought of raising her baby girl and watching her grow up, Shelby knew that she still had so many things that she wanted to accomplish. She had dreams that she needed to pursue. She wasn't ready for the responsibility and she knew that she needed to give herself and her baby their best chance.

"Yes," Shelby said honestly, her heart feeling heavy. "Of course I trust you."

A few days later, Hiram and Leroy sat her down across from them on the kitchen island where she had been sitting nights before. A contract had been drawn up. It stated that Shelby could not seek out her daughter until she was 18 years old, unless her daughter contacted her first. It assured Hiram and Leroy that they would have the security to raise their daughter without fear of Shelby fighting them for custody. It acted as a deterrent to prevent Shelby from changing her mind. And it protected the baby from any nasty custody battles in the future. She was making a legally binding commitment to give up her daughter, at least for the next 18 years.

Shelby had been reading over the contract for the past ten minutes. After her third time through it, Shelby finally looked up, meeting Hiram and Leroy's intense gaze. "So, what do you think Shelbs?" Leroy asked cautiously. "Will you sign it?"

Shelby stared at the two men sitting in front of her and actually felt her heart break. How can she deny them? When they first met Shelby they told her that they had been trying to adopt a baby for years but kept getting denied by different agencies that were wary about sending a child home with two dads. They finally decided to take matters into their own hands and Shelby was the only one who had taken their ad seriously. Instead, they were getting hate calls for weeks from ignorant people telling them that they didn't deserve to be parents because of who and how they chose to love. That wasn't right. Shelby could see that they had so much love to give and how desperately they wanted to build a family.

"Yes, I'll sign it," Shelby said, finally breaking the silence. "But under one condition—"

"—Okay, Shelby… I understand you may have some concerns but the point of the contract is—" Hiram began to argue. Leroy quickly placed his hand on his husband's arm. "Let's let Shelby tell us what her conditions are first and then we can discuss," he interjected. "Go ahead, Shelbs."

Shelby got up, walked over to the cupboard, and pulled out a glass cup with a gold star on it. She filled it up with water, took a long sip, and sat back down. "Will you do me a favor?" she said, setting the glass cup down in front of her and placing a hand on her stomach. "Whenever she's feeling sad or upset, will you bring her a glass of water in this cup? It's what my dad used to do for me growing up and it always comforted me. Also, gold stars are kinda my thing," Shelby smirked.

Hiram and Leroy broke out into huge smiles, walked over, and engulfed a very-pregnant Shelby in a group hug. "Of course we will," Hiram promised, squeezing the young woman, trying to make her physically feel his gratitude.

Shelby also asked the soon-to-be-dads if they can give the baby a few other things from her: a blanket she had been making for a few weeks, her entire Barbra Streisand movie and music collection, and a tape of her singing "I Dreamed a Dream." Shelby had hoped that even if she couldn't cuddle with her daughter or take her to her first musical that she'd still be able to inadvertently comfort her from far away.

They also all agreed that they would cease contact. Despite the genuine friendship that they had developed, it would be easier on everyone involved if there was no communication. Shelby, however, was completely surprised when the couple told her that they would be willing to send her photos and a letter once a year to update her on the child as she grew up. It would never compare to actually being in her daughter's life, but knowing about her life and seeing her, even through photos, was more than Shelby expected.

So, on October 31st Shelby signed the contract, never being able to celebrate Halloween quite the same way again. And on December 18th at 6:07 a.m., Rachel Barbra Berry was born. When they first placed the baby in Shelby's arm, her heart instantly exploded and she knew right then and there that she would never love or cherish anyone or anything more again in her entire life. Hiram and Leroy had graciously let Shelby spend the day with the newborn and gave her the privacy to say her goodbyes. It was the shortest day of her life. Shelby spent it cuddling her daughter close to her and memorizing every detail of her baby's face. Rachel and her deep brown eyes was the most beautiful thing that Shelby had ever seen.

The next morning, she woke up to flowers and three envelopes placed at her bedside table: a heartfelt letter of gratitude from Hiram and Leroy, a copy of the contract, and a one-way plane ticket to New York City. Looking around at the empty hospital room, Shelby felt the walls that she had been carefully building for months begin to break. She pulled her blanket to her face, breathed in Rachel's baby scent, and quietly began to sob.

A week later, Shelby steeled herself, and met her family in Cleveland for the holidays. She got the best Christmas present she could've ever asked for: the treatment was working and her dad was well on his way to being cancer-free and in remission. After the New Year, Shelby moved back to New York, ready to begin her life once again.

* * *

 **A/N: Thanks for all the great responses so far! This chapter and next is a lot of background/world-building. I've always thought that there should've been more to Shelby's story.**


	3. Chapter 3

As Shelby drove to the Lima Bean to meet Hiram and Leroy, she thought about the past thirteen years of her life. She wouldn't go so far to say that she's been unhappy. In fact, she's found a lot joy and even more success in her life since she gave up Rachel.

* * *

After Shelby moved to New York, she quickly got to work. She took part-time jobs tutoring high school students in English and waitressing at a diner. Every other free time she had was spent taking any classes or workshops that she could afford, rehearsing, and auditioning. A few months into her hustle, she caught a break and got cast as a swing in the company of a new rock musical called "Rent." It was wildly successful and went on to win the Tony that year. After a year of being in the chorus, the producers, who took a liking with Shelby's drive and work ethic, asked her if she was interested in being the standby for the role of Maureen in the musical's first national tour. Shelby quickly agreed and spent the next thirteen months impressing audiences across the country every time she was lucky enough to be on stage. After "Rent," Shelby played a few off-Broadway roles until one of her friends told her about a casting call for a new musical about the life and times of the Wicked Witch of the West. At first she wasn't interested, but after remembering all of the times she watched "The Wizard of Oz" while she was pregnant with Rachel and recalling how the music seemed to soothe the baby in her stomach, Shelby found herself auditioning.

After making it through several rounds of auditions and callbacks, everyone on the casting and creative team fell in love with Shelby's powerful voice, serious acting skills, and contagious energy and charm. The further along she got through the audition process, the more excited the young actress got. Everything seemed lined up for Shelby to get the lead role of Elphaba. However, in the eleventh hour, the director and producers decided to go with a different actress, concerned that Shelby didn't have the experience to carry the show on Broadway. Instead, they offered her the standby role for Elphaba. Shelby was devastated but still accepted already feeling so connected and invested in the new musical after reading for the role in all of the developmental workshops. A couple weeks into the pre-Broadway run in San Francisco, Shelby had been blowing away audiences while stepping in for the lead actress who was out of town. At the end of one of the shows, the producers called Shelby in to meet with them. Apparently, the lead they chose over her decided to leave the show to pursue another opportunity and they are now offering her the principal role. Shelby quickly acquiesced, knowing full well that her life was about to change for good.

Shelby's run as the first green girl in "Wicked" was a soaring success that culminated with a Tony Award for Best Performance by a Leading Actress in a Musical. After two years of dedicating her life to the musical that gave her her big break, Shelby bowed out after leading the hit show eight-times-a-week on Broadway. Feeling the burn out of grinding in the theater day-after-day, Shelby took a break for the first time in more than five years. Truth be told, the busier she was, the less time she had to think about Rachel. It's not that she was trying to forget her daughter, she couldn't. But it's just that every time she did, she felt the cracks in her heart ready to open up and swallow her whole.

Despite her critically-acclaimed performance in "Wicked," Shelby was by no-means a household name. Although she wasn't on the radio or starred in any Hollywood movies, she had achieved a very respectable level of fame and was a Broadway star in her own right. She was also notoriously known for being extremely private, much to the chagrin of her publicist. Although her overall goal was to keep her worlds separate; in reality, Shelby also wanted to protect Rachel. She didn't want anyone finding out about her daughter and using her or the past against her. Maybe in part that's why she also decided to shift gears and started teaching, to pursue a more lowkey lifestyle.

Following her success in "Wicked," she was asked to teach musical theater students as an adjunct professor at her alma mater at NYU. Realizing that she also loved helping students find their voice and passion, she decided to go back to school to get her education degree. After finishing up her Master's and wanting to get a singing fix in before she started teaching full-time, she began a concert tour, performing with symphonies across the country. On one of her last stops on tour, a school principal approached Shelby after her show in Columbus, Ohio with a very lucrative job offer to teach English and coach show choir at Carmel, a high school in an affluent suburb right outside of her hometown of Lima.

Shelby's first inclination was to reject it. She had built her life and career in New York. Apart from Rachel, the city had been one of the only great loves of her life. But she didn't have her family. Sure, Shelby had made incredible friends there but it wasn't the same. Although her parents and sister visited her in New York whenever they could and have flown all around the country to see her perform throughout the years, Shelby kept her distance and hasn't been back to her hometown since she was pregnant. However, it's been a few years and Shelby knew from the last update she received that the Berry men had moved their family to Chicago after Leroy accepted a teaching job at Northwestern University.

Knowing that she needed to move on, she finally told her family about Rachel. They were heartbroken for Shelby but understood and accepted her reasons for why she did it. Her dad, especially, was incredibly touched at the sacrifice his daughter made for him. They encouraged Shelby to move back home so they can help her begin to heal after years of repressing all of the painful emotions and heartache she felt. Shelby agreed knowing that she needed balance and needed to let herself process everything in a healthy way with the support of her family before she got to the end of her life with only trophies lined on her shelf and theater credits under her name to show for it.

And that's how Shelby found herself teaching at Carmel High School and coaching show choir. It was a far-cry from her nights on Broadway, but Shelby found that she truly enjoyed coaching Vocal Adrenaline, mentoring students, and helping them craft their skills to pursue their passion in the arts. Shelby knew that she could always go back to the stage, but she was content for now and it also helped that she wasn't just good at her job, she was _great_ at it. Known as the "Ice Queen" around the show choir circuit, Shelby had a take-no-prisoners attitude and was known to be fiercely competitive. On the other hand, she was also extremely dedicated to her students and went to great lengths to help them achieve excellence. With her Broadway training and wildly creative ideas, Shelby built Vocal Adrenaline into a show choir powerhouse winning Nationals the past two years and a third easily within grasp.

* * *

So no, Shelby wasn't unhappy. But she knew that she wasn't completely happy either. Despite achieving some of her wildest dreams and reaching heights she didn't even know was possible, Shelby couldn't lie and say that any of it measured up to the joy she felt giving birth to Rachel. In fact, this entire time, Shelby's felt a little broken, as if a part of her was missing and that emptiness never seemed to fill up no matter how many bows she took or show choir competitions she won. She hasn't felt whole for years now that she thinks about it. She hasn't felt quite _together_ for some time. That is until she watched her daughter perform on stage and she physically felt her heart mend itself and quadruple in size.

Shelby parked her Range Rover outside of the popular coffee shop and cut the engine. Her knuckles white from gripping the steering wheel, she took a deep breath and slowly pushed the air out through her lips. Nervous was an understatement. It's been almost a week since Sectionals and her anxiety had only grown tenfold. She still had no idea what the Berry men wanted to talk to her about. Hiram had been short and cryptic on the phone insisting that it would be better to discuss everything in person.

What was _everything?_ Did they want to meet with her only to remind her to stay away from Rachel? Was Rachel okay? Why were they even back from Chicago? Shelby didn't get her yearly letter or photos from the Berry's last December, so the last update she got was when Rachel just turned 12 almost two years ago and everything seemed fine then. Shelby was devastated when she didn't get her update on Rachel last year. It wasn't in the contract, so she she assumed that they had just cut her off for whatever reason. It hurt her deeply for months and she had only started to accept it. She didn't know how she would react if Hiram and Leroy were luring her in only to shoot her down. She had only seen Rachel for maybe less than ten minutes and she was already so attached.

A loud knock on her window quickly pulled her away from her thoughts. Shelby turned her head to see Hiram standing outside the driver's side of the car giving her a quizzical look. Caught off guard, she fumbled around until she pushed the button to roll the window down.

"Hey! Sorry I didn't mean to startle you," Hiram said, amused again at Shelby's behavior. "Are you coming in? I think Leroy's already inside."

Feeling knots in her stomach begin to grow, Shelby opened her mouth to respond but nothing came out. She opted to just nod her head yes.

"Everything alright?"

"Yeah," she lied, cursing Hiram for always being so intuitive. "Sorry, I'll be right in. Just give me a second and I'll meet you in there?"

Recognizing that the woman needed a few moments to herself, he politely nodded, and quickly walked away.

As soon as she saw Hiram walk inside the coffee shop, Shelby immediately put her head down on the steering wheel and started to take panicked breaths. It's been years since she's had a anxiety attack and Shelby would be damned if she had one today. Refusing to let the panic consume her, she tried to gain control of the situation and took a few deep breaths while consciously attempting to slow down the pounding in her heart. _In and out. In and out._ She kept her eyes closed and focused on her breathing. After a few moments of deep, generous breaths and trying to relax her muscles, Shelby slowly started to feel the edge come off. Once she felt as calm as she could get, she pulled down her mirror and looked at her reflection staring back at her.

 _You can do this. You're Shelby Corcoran, a Broadway Star, a renowned show choir coach. You can do anything. You can handle anything…. Except giving up your daughter._

Shelby quickly pushed those dangerous thoughts away before she could enter a downward spiral of self-deprecation and instead channeled strength and allowed herself to feel a new resolve wash over her. No matter what they wanted to talk about. No matter what they tell her. No matter what happened in the next few hours, Shelby was going to fight. She wasn't going to take whatever Hiram and Leroy had to dish lying down. Seeing Rachel in person gave her that push she needed. She didn't regret giving her to the Berry's, they had given her a wonderful life so far, from her understanding, but she also didn't want to be shut out anymore. She wanted some sort of contact or relationship. She wanted her daughter to be in her life in any way, shape, or form that she could get her.

She took another deep breath for safe measure, swiftly fixed her hair, gathered her purse, and got out of the car before she could change her mind. Seeing Hiram and Leroy sitting at a table by the window, she walked towards the coffee shop with a renewed purpose. She's going to get her baby back.


	4. Chapter 4

Stepping into the Lima Bean, the smell of coffee and freshly baked goods immediately filled the air. Shelby looked around the crowded coffee shop and saw a group of Dalton Academy students, recognizing a few of them from show choir competitions, sitting in a corner. The Berry men were sitting at a table directly adjacent to them. Leroy spotted her first and waved to flag her down. Shelby waved back in acknowledgement, took a moment to gather her strength, and walked toward the couple.

"You guys, just wait until this kid I know, Blaine Anderson, starts at Dalton next year. He's got a killer voice and he's definitely Warbler material. He'll for sure help us get to regionals, and maybe even beat Vocal Adrenaline next year."

 _Not a chance_ , Shelby smiled to herself as she walked past the group of well-dressed young men engrossed in loud conversation.

Hiram and Leroy quickly got up when she approached. "Shelby, thanks so much for coming," Leroy said as he pulled her into a polite hug.

"I got you tea," Hiram said after quickly kissing her cheek and motioning for her to sit down. Shelby put her purse down and took a seat across from them. She nervously took a sip from the steaming cup of tea and smiled, "Thanks, you remembered."

"Lemon ginger with honey," Hiram recalled. "You drank it every night when you were pregnant with Rachel. Decaf, of course."

"That and gallons and gallons of strawberry ice cream," Leroy quipped. "I remember when I had to drive to not _one_ but _three_ different grocery stores during a late summer storm because you just _had_ to have it."

The table broke out in laughter and Shelby smiled fondly at the memory of Leroy coming back drenched in rain with seven tubs of her favorite strawberry ice cream. He cleaned out the store so he wouldn't have to go on another disastrous search for them. They had to finish two tubs between the three of them that night since it all wouldn't fit in the freezer.

"I would say I'm sorry, but I also feel like you could've said no or gone back home after the first grocery store," she retorted.

"And tell you _no?"_ Leroy fake gasped. "I wouldn't have dared tell a pregnant Shelby no."

"That's right," Hiram added. "Or else you get a locked door and an angry pregnant Shelby blasting 'Don't Rain on My Parade' on the stereo after telling her that she couldn't go on the elliptical anymore after the doctor ordered bed rest."

The three of them laughed again at the distant memory.

"Again, I would say I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to blame that one on my raging hormones."

"Oh sure, and not at all on your flair for the dramatics," Leroy jokes.

"Nah, not at all," Shelby shrugged, feeling slightly more comfortable after the light banter between them. She crossed her legs and took another generous sip of her tea. After a few moments of silence she met Hiram's wistful expression. She looked away suddenly feeling the gravity of the situation hit her.

"It really is nice to see you, Shelby," Leroy said truthfully. "You look great. How are you?"

"I'm alright," Shelby smiled kindly. "I've been busy."

"Busy winning a Tony and building a show choir dynasty," Hiram chuckled.

Shelby felt her cheeks burn red, suddenly feeling very self-conscious. She'll always feel like a young and confused 23-year-old in front of them. She made a split-second decision to just cut to the chase.

"Is Rachel okay?" she said, drawing the conversation away from herself. "When did you move back to Lima? I didn't hear from you last year."

Shelby didn't miss the quick look the two men shared and she felt defensive all of a sudden remembering that she was the outsider in this situation.

"Shelby, there's something we need to tell you."

"I know and that's why we're here aren't we?" Her patience running thin. "What's going on?"

Leroy shifted in his seat and Hiram grabbed a manila folder out of the messenger bag hanging off his chair. He pulled out a stack of papers and pushed it towards the woman. Shelby felt her breath hitch recognizing the documents.

"Do you know what this is?"

"Of course I do," she said, picking it up carefully. _I've memorized every single word of this contact. I can recite what it says by heart._ She dropped the contract on the table and pushed it back towards Hiram.

"Listen, like I told you before, I didn't know Rachel was going to be at that competition. I didn't seek her out." _But believe me, I've wanted to._ Shelby was trying to stay calm but they had thrown the contract in her face, she felt attacked now. "Trust me, I know what that the contract says but I really think that—"

"—We want to change the terms," Hiram interrupted.

"What? What do you mean?" Shelby began to panic. _What more can they do to separate her from her daughter?_

"We're getting a divorce," Leroy said, straightening up in his seat. "I mean, we just got a divorce. That's why Hiram and Rachel are back."

Shelby was beyond surprised. Of all of the possibilities that she thought of, this wasn't what she was expecting. She slumped her shoulders and leaned back against her chair. She then allowed herself to examine the two men in front of her for the first time since she sat down. They had visibly aged in the 13 years since she last saw them, but in a way that only accentuated their handsome features. Some of Leroy's dark curls had started to turn gray and his caramel eyes now wore a sort-of sad expression. Hiram, who she remembered was usually clean shaven, was now sporting a scraggly graying beard and beneath his thick-rimmed glasses were prominent dark circles under his eyes. Shelby was so caught up in her own anxiety that she didn't realize the awkward space between the two men. She didn't see how just how _tired_ they looked.

"It's been bad for a while now, and we've been separated for the past year," Hiram explained as he cleared his throat uncomfortably. "We wanted to wait until Rachel finished middle school until we made the divorce final. My old boss at the law firm in town offered me Senior Partner at the beginning of the summer, and I couldn't refuse. You know that I'm from here and my family's still here. There was nothing really left for me in Chicago." Shelby instantly noticed the darker man's body tense up and she kept quiet feeling more and more like she was intruding on a private matter.

"And I have tenure at Northwestern and I had planned to take a sabbatical next year in London to finish writing a book," Leroy continued the story. "So we decided that Hiram and Rachel would move back to Lima right in time for Rach to start high school here. They've been here since mid-August, and I leave for London after the holidays."

It was now the end of October, it was almost Halloween. Her baby had been so close to her for almost three months now, and she had no idea.

"What—um, what happened?" Shelby said, genuinely confused. She didn't know if was prying but the two men that she met 14 years ago were madly in love, they were perfect for each other. Their love for one another was so palpable and so pure, and it was one of the reasons she felt confident in being their surrogate knowing that their love would hopefully bring stability and security to their child. Maybe it was naive of her to think of or believe in love in that way.

"It may sounds cliche, but life did," Leroy spoke up first. He looked over at his ex-husband and then at the young woman who had given him his little girl. "We just got lost somewhere along the way and by the time we realized it, we were too late to fix it. We tried to make it work but then realized that we needed move on and do what was best for everyone involved."

Hiram nodded in agreement. "We've tried to be respectful and civil for Rachel. But, I'm not going to lie, Shelby. It's been a really, really difficult year for all of us. You're not married yet, right? And you don't have any other kids?"

"No I'm not and I don't, so I really can't imagine what it must be like," she said emphatically. It was true. Shelby had been in only one serious relationship while she was in New York. They dated for nearly three years and she knew they loved and cared for one another, but something always kept her from taking it to the next level. "I'm really sorry that things didn't work out. How is Rachel taking it?"

"Good. And bad," Leroy answered. "Rachel is extremely thoughtful, sometimes to a fault, and I think she's been trying to stay strong to spare our feelings."

"Definitely," Hiram agreed. "And she's had a hard time with the move. We've lived in Chicago since she was five, so she's having a rough adjustment moving away from a big city. She calls herself a 'cosmopolitan woman' and keeps going on about how we're trying to 'keep her talents in a cage that is the small town of Lima, Ohio.'"

Shelby smiled at the description of her caring and dramatic daughter but then frowned realizing the hurt that she must be going through.

"Rachel was involved with our community theater back in Chicago, and she was very disappointed because she was about to start at a performing arts high school. She loves singing and dancing and she's always needed that outlet, so that's why she decided to do show choir at McKinley. But she only joined last minute to help her Spanish teacher reach the 12-member requirement a few days before Sectionals, so we know that you couldn't have known that she was competing. It was weird that I ran into you though, because Leroy and I were just talking about how we wanted to reach out to you."

Shelby felt the pit in her stomach grow again, unsure of where this conversation was leading. Did they want to change the contract to make sure it was stricter now that they were all in the same town?

"To change the terms of the contract? Because I have a few thoughts on this myself."

"We want to change it to give you shared custody of Rachel," Leroy cut her off, sensing that the woman was getting worked up. "So, I guess, really, we want to terminate it."

"That is, if you want to be in Rachel's life," Hiram quickly added. "If you want to be her mom."

"Yes," she said without skipping a beat, nodding her head in disbelief. "Absolutely, yes. I want Rachel. I've always wanted Rachel," her heart was pounding in her chest and tears automatically began to pool in her green eyes. "But why? Why now?"

Leroy gently took Shelby's hand and looked at her seriously. "You have to believe us when we say that when we drew up the contract, we really thought that we were doing it in everyone's best interest. And in a way, we did for the most part. Am I wrong in saying that you weren't ready to be a mom then, Shelby?"

To her own embarrassment, Shelby was full out crying now. All of the regret, the insecurities, the hurt she's felt over this during the last 14 years was swirling inside of her like a raging storm ready to be let go. She shook her head no.

"You had dreams that you needed to accomplish Shelby. And you did," Hiram said, his voice thick with emotion. "You were so young and determined and we didn't want to take that away from you. It wouldn't have been fair. We also really needed the space to start our family on our own. But we're so grateful for you. You took a chance on us when nobody else did and you've given us the greatest joy of our lives. We know that we asked you to make a huge sacrifice, but now we want to correct that."

"Why are you letting me be a part of her life now? You just got divorced. I don't want this to be confusing for her. I don't want to be some sort of consolation prize. How do you even know that I'm ready now? How can you just trust me right away?" She was trying so hard to reign in her emotions and think logically but she was operating on pure shock and adrenaline now. So much for being the Ice Queen.

"Because we knew that from the moment you got pregnant that you wanted the baby. And we encouraged you to walk away anyway," Leroy answered, feeling the guilt rise up in his chest. "I mean, Shelby, c'mon, you paid us back what we gave you a year after Rachel was born, with interest," he laughed. "We definitely knew then that you were never in it for the money."

That was always true. One of the biggest regrets Shelby had was actually taking money from the Berry's. Although she needed it to help her parents, she never felt right about it. She saved up every penny she earned during her first year in New York. When she got her first Broadway paycheck from "Rent," she immediately wrote a check out to the two men.

"And we're not going to pretend like the lovely Christmas presents that Rachel gets every year from 'Santa' aren't from you," Hiram said amused. "We also talked to your father."

"What? When?" Shelby said in shock. Her mind was going into overdrive trying to process all this information at once.

"He tracked us down. It was right after Rachel just turned 12 and he came and tried to pay us back the money you used for his cancer treatment. Like father, like daughter, I guess. And he told us how much giving up Rachel affected you. We started talking about letting the two of you meet then, but that's when things really started to fall apart in our marriage. We're so sorry, Shelby," Hiram apologized. "Do you regret giving us Rachel?"

"I don't know... no… then yes, then _so_ much," Shelby confessed. "I really don't know. I was so young and so confused and I wasn't ready to be a mom. I couldn't have provided for her in the way that you have, that _both_ of you have. I've missed so much already."

"But there's so much more ahead," Leroy assured her.

"I want Rachel, I do. I think I probably even _need_ her, but how do you know that she _needs_ _me?"_ Shelby questioned, saying her deepest fear and biggest insecurity out loud for the first time.

"Leroy and I have tried our best to be everything for Rachel, but the one that thing we absolutely can't be is her mom. Rachel needs you. We know that our divorce is impacting her more than she lets on. She needs us right now. All three of us."

"She also just started high school," Leroy chimed in. "She's a teenager now and she's going to need her mom more than ever to help her navigate all the pressures that come with that from her classes, to her friends, and to even boys," he shuddered.

"And not to mention, and genetics really are amazing, that Rachel's dream is to be Broadway star. Can you imagine when we tell her that her mom is _the_ Shelby Corcoran. I don't think she'll ever forgive us." Hiram joked but paused and looked at her seriously. "There's so much you can teach her, Shelby. Only _you_ can teach her."

"Okay," Shelby said, not needing any more convincing. This is what she's always wanted. Broadway was her dream but being Rachel's mom was always her _bigger_ and _better_ dream. "I'm in. I'm all in."

Hiram and Leroy instantly got up and wrapped Shelby into a hug. She smiled to herself realizing that this was the position she found herself in almost 14 years ago after she signed the contract agreeing to give her baby away. Except this time she was now getting her baby back.

"So what now?" Shelby asked as she pulled away from the two men.

"Now, everything changes," Hiram replied as he ripped up the contract.

* * *

 **A/N:** **Just a fair warning that this is going to be a mostly Shelby-centric (and Rachel) story, but I'll try to include as many characters as I can. Rachel to come in the next few chapters!**


	5. Chapter 5

Shelby left the coffee shop soon after discussing the logistics with the two men. They were going to meet at Hiram's law firm in a few days to sort out the custody arrangement. After everything was arranged legally, Hiram and Leroy would tell Rachel about Shelby and give their daughter a couple of days to process. They made plans to have a "family" brunch together the following Saturday so Shelby and Rachel can meet for the first time. _One week_. It was only one more week until she'd be reunited with her baby, not just for a little while but for good, for forever.

Shelby was so wrapped up in her thoughts that she didn't realize she started walking away from her car. Deciding that she was too wired to just go home, she started walking towards downtown Lima to enjoy the beautiful fall day.

She wandered down the street for a while soaking in the crisp air and the trees skirted by pools of autumn gold and rust-colored leaves. She watched as the leaves pirouetted down an invisible spiral of breeze spinning through the air as if it was performing an elegant dance. Shelby felt _alive._ It's like she was seeing the world for the first time. She couldn't wait to experience life with Rachel.

She spotted the local bookstore and smiled to herself thinking that she would stop in and pick up a few things for Rachel.

When she walked into the book shop she immediately heard music playing. Listening to the sounds of the piano, she realized that somebody started playing Lionel Richie's "Hello." Shelby mentally high-fived herself. One of her more random talents is being able to recognize songs after only a few notes.

Using her new knowledge of Rachel's love for Broadway, she started to make her way over to the celebrity biographies. The music got louder as she got closer to her destination. As soon as she heard singing, she instantly recognized the male voice. Shelby smiled inwardly knowing that it belonged to her always-eager-to-please Vocal Adrenaline star, Jesse St. James.

 _He's probably doing another one of his impromptu concerts for the homeless,_ Shelby chucked to herself thinking about her favorite student. Sure, Jesse was a little too green and maybe overly ambitious but he was also extremely dedicated and refreshingly passionate. He worked hard and really soaked up everything she had to teach him, and Shelby liked that. It reminded her of herself. She picked up a biography of Patti LuPone and continued to listen deciding that she'd stop and say hi after he was done.

" _Hello. Is it me you're looking for?"_

At least he sounds good, Shelby critiqued.

"— _I can see it in your eyes._

 _I can see it in your smile._

 _You're all I've ever wanted, and my arms are opened wide."_

A female voice joined Jesse's singing and Shelby dropped the book she was holding in her hands. She knows that voice. Her heart racing, she practically sprinted over to the piano. Shelby's breath caught her in her throat as soon as she saw her. _Rachel._ And she was singing with Jesse, who was staring at her daughter a little too intensely for her comfort.

 _Absolutely. Not.,_ Shelby thought. Rachel's 13 and Jesse just turned 16. It was highly inappropriate. She should _not_ be _singing_ with any boys, especially not Jesse St. James. _How do they even know each other?_

" _I long to see the sunlight in your hair."_

Shelby watched as Rachel timidly looked at Jesse. _Don't you dare sit down on that piano bench, Rachel Barbra Berry._ Rachel sat down and scooted closer to Jesse. Shelby groaned.

" _And tell you time and time again. How much I care,"_ Rachel sang back.

Shelby, again, was entranced by her daughter's beautiful voice. Rachel had so much raw talent. She sighed and resigned to just watching this play out. Rachel and Jesse started to draw in a crowd just as enthralled as she was. They really did sound great together. An orchestra started playing with them and Shelby rolled her eyes noticing that they were Carmel High School students that Jesse probably conned into performing with him.

When the song ended the crowd started to clap, and Shelby instantly began to panic remembering that she wasn't supposed to see Rachel. She quickly turned around and tried to shuffle her way out of the crowd, but it was too late.

"Shelby!" Jesse called out after her.

 _Crap_. Shelby was fit. She worked out. She wagers that she can probably run out of there faster than Usain Bolt can run the 100 meter, even with her heels on.

Jesse, however, moved even faster and before Shelby knew it, he was standing right in front of her with his signature show smile plastered on his face.

"Shelby, hey! I called for you, didn't you hear me?"

Of course she heard him, but she couldn't exactly hang out with him or her long-lost daughter right now _._ "No, sorry," she lied. "Great rendition of 'Hello,' though you sounded a little flat toward the end. I really have to go now. See you at school on Monday."

"Woah, wait!" Jesse protested. "There's someone I want to you to meet!"

Of course. Of all the scenarios she thought of her in head throughout the years, being introduced to her daughter by Jesse frickin' St. James was definitely not one of them.

"Maybe next time Jesse, but I really have to go," Shelby said as she tried to walk around him.

"Hey Jesse, you forgot your sheet music," a voice said from behind her and Shelby froze.

"Rach! Perfect timing, there's someone I want to introduce you to."

Shelby was paralyzed. The entire room went silent. All she could hear was the pounding of her heart. Shelby slowly turned around and felt time physically stop. Seeing Rachel face-to-face for the first time literally took her breath away. It was like looking in a mirror.

"Rachel, this is—"Jesse said, interrupting the moment.

"Shelby Corcoran," Rachel said in shock and recognition.

Shelby was certain she was going to pass out.

"You're Vocal Adrenaline's head coach. And you're a Broadway actress. And you were Elphaba in 'Wicked.' _And_ you won a Tony," Rachel blurted out. "You're amazing. You're one of my idols. I'm Rachel. Rachel Barbra Berry."

Shelby was speechless. Again. Her daughter seemed to have that effect on her.

Rachel's face dropped at Shelby's lack of reaction and Shelby quickly recovered.

"Sorry, hi Rachel. I'm Shelby," she said as she reached out, tentatively at first, and held Rachel's hand to shake. It was a magnetic feeling.

Rachel flashed her a brilliant megawatt smile and Shelby's heart instantly melted. She would move the stars and the moon to keep that smile on her baby's face.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Ms. Corcoran," Rachel said as she let go of her hand. Shelby immediately missed the lack of contact but smiled in amusement at her daughter's manners and professionalism.

"Please, call me Shelby."

"Shelby, Rachel is the one from McKinley who sang 'Don't Rain on My Parade' at Sectionals last week. I just ran into her and was telling her that although I thought she lacked Barbra's emotional depth that she's actually quite talented."

Shelby cringed at Jesse's backhanded compliment.

"I remember, and I thought you were _extraordinary_ , Rachel," Shelby praised honestly. Jesse's jaw dropped in astonishment. It took him nearly six months of blood, sweat, and tears to get a mumbled 'Good job, Jesse' from his stern coach.

"Thanks!" Rachel blushed. "I've been working on it since I was four."

Shelby beamed at her daughter's excitement. She mustered up all the strength she could gather to stop herself from pulling her in for a hug.

"Anyways, I was just telling Rachel about Vocal Adrenaline and how our show choir program is the best in the country," Jesse said.

Before she could reply, Rachel's phone began to ring. "Excuse me, I have to get this, it's my dad," she explained. Shelby's panic spiked internally remembering that she was not supposed to be meeting the young girl right now. She just got done telling Hiram and Leroy that she would let them handle introducing the idea of meeting her mom to her. Shelby was not going to screw this up now.

"Daddy! You'll never guess who I just met!" Rachel greeted cheerfully into the phone as she walked away a few feet for privacy.

Crap again. Shelby acted quickly and pulled out her phone and sent a text to Hiram " _Ran into R at the bookstore. Total accident. Didn't tell her who I was."_

Hoping that did the trick, she looked over at Rachel who let out a loud giggle that traveled its way right smack into the middle of Shelby's heart. Next to Rachel's singing, her laughter was the second best thing that Shelby had ever heard.

"—So what do you think, Shelby?" Jesse asked, not realizing that his coach was not paying any attention to him at all.

"Jesse, what are you doing with Rachel?" Shelby demanded, turning her focus to the young man.

"Ok fine. I didn't _just_ run into her, but I was just telling her about VA and everything we have to offer because listen coach," Jesse grabbed Shelby's arm, pulled her away from Rachel, and lowered his voice to whisper. "I found out that Rachel just moved here. That means she has no real allegiance to McKinley's 'Right Direction' or whatever they're called. We can totally poach her and convince her to join us instead. I mean you heard us, we'd be unstoppable!"

Shelby groaned internally. _Teenagers._ She turned to look over at Rachel who sounded like she was wrapping up her phone call.

"We will discuss this later," she said to her student seriously. "But do not, under any circumstance, bring up joining Vocal Adrenaline again to Rachel."

Jesse began to protest but Rachel walked over to join the group again.

"Sorry about that! That was one of my dads and he's on his way to pick me up," The teenager said with a hint of disappointment in her voice.

Shelby didn't miss the confusion that spread across her student's face and instantly prayed he wouldn't say anything ignorant.

"I'd better go, but it was great singing with you Jesse," Rachel said as she blushed and looked at him shyly.

"Yeah, we should do it again sometime," Jesse replied. "And if you have any questions about VA, just let me—" Shelby immediately elbowed him in the stomach. "—Know!" Jesse groaned.

"Yeah, I'd like that!" Rachel said eagerly, seeming to have missed Shelby's literal jab at Jesse who started walking away from the two before Shelby could hit him again.

"I really wish I could stay because I have so much I'd like to ask you Ms. Corcoran like what was it like to fly high during 'Defying Gravity?' Or what was your favorite musical growing up? Or what inspires you? Or who was your favorite actor or director to work with? I bet it was April Rhodes, she was great as your Glinda!" Rachel spouted out in rapid succession.

Shelby couldn't help but laugh in amusement at her daughter's passion and Rachel blushed in response.

"Sorry, I tend to ramble but it's also not every day that I get to meet a real Broadway Star," Rachel said in awe. "You really are incredible."

Shelby's heard dozens of people throughout the years compliment her on her skills. She's had some of the industry's toughest critics commend her on performances. She even had a Tony to show for it. But none of it felt as good as Rachel giving her genuine praise.

"Thank you for saying that Rachel, but I also really think that you're incredible as well," Shelby said, offering a kind smile. "You've got a raw and powerful voice, and I see so much potential in you. You're a natural."

Rachel broke out into the brightest smile that Shelby had ever seen. She could get used to that. A few moments of silence passed and Shelby suddenly noticed the wheels turning in her daughter's head and range of emotions playing out in Rachel's expressive eyes.

"What is it, Rachel?" Shelby asked cautiously.

Rachel looked up at her, surprised that Shelby picked up so quickly on her mood change.

"It's nothing," she said apprehensively.

Shelby instinctively grabbed Rachel's hand and gave it a comforting squeeze. "It's okay, you can tell me. I won't mind, honestly."

"Well, I was just wondering if I could actually have a hug?" Rachel asked hopefully. "I know this might sound weird, but next to 'Funny Girl,' 'Wicked' was my favorite musical growing up and I always listened to the cast recording whenever I felt down or anything. And anyway, this past year has been kind of um— _challenging_ —but listening to it, you especially, always comforted me. Sorry I know I—"

Shelby immediately wrapped her arms around her daughter and pulled her close. She smiled realizing how perfectly they fit together with Rachel's head resting right underneath her chin. She breathed in the faint scent of Rachel's cucumber and mint shampoo and let the rightness of it all wash over her. She held on a little tighter and felt Rachel's heartbeat against her chest, and it was as if Shelby's entire world had come into focus. In a blink of an eye, there was an entire new life in front of her.

After a few seconds, Rachel stepped back and quickly wiped away a stray tear. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to cry. I don't even know why I am."

"You don't have to apologize," Shelby said, tucking Rachel's hair behind her ears and gently cupping her face. "Please don't apologize. I'm glad I was able to do that for you, Rachel."

"Thanks," Rachel smiled appreciatively. "Well, I should go. My dad's probably outside waiting for me. Maybe you can answer my questions for me another time?"

"I'd love to," Shelby promised. "It was _really_ great meeting you, Rachel."

Rachel grinned in agreement and started to walk away. Before she reached the end of the aisle, she turned around.

"You're really kind, Ms. Corcoran," Rachel said honestly. "And that's unfortunate because it's just going to make it that much harder when the New Directions _beat_ Vocal Adrenaline this year."

"Bring it," Shelby laughed as she accepted the challenge.

Rachel smirked and promptly turned on her heels and stormed away. Shelby chuckled again at her daughter's theatrics.

If she didn't know that she would be reunited with Rachel a week from now, seeing her daughter walk away would've devastated her. Instead, it fueled her excitement. If Shelby had any expectations, Rachel just absolutely shattered and exceeded all of them.

 _Now where did Mr. St. James escape to?_ Shelby wondered as she headed back over to the celebrity biographies aisle. She quickly spotted him flipping through a Gene Kelly biography.

"Looking for lifestyle tips?" Shelby teased.

Jesse put the book back on the shelf and faced his coach nervously. "I'm sorry, Coach," he said earnestly. "I didn't know that I was doing anything wrong with talking to Rachel. You heard her, she's pretty good and I just thought I'd at least tell her about VA—you know, to help the team."

Shelby's expression softened and she sighed. Jesse continued to avert eye contact.

"Hey Jesse, will you look at me?" Shelby asked. "Listen, I love that you're so dedicated to this team. I really appreciate it. But it's not your job to recruit for VA."

"I know," he said sounding a little more contrite. "But Rachel is really good and I didn't want to miss this opportunity! I really thought I'd be able to convince her."

"But it's _not_ your job to convince her," Shelby continued to admonish. "And we can't go around 'poaching' students from other teams. It's sneaky and we don't want that kind of reputation. Not to mention, it's completely against the rules. Your _only_ job is to keep working hard, focus on regionals, and just have fun. That's it, Jesse."

"Alright Coach C," Jesse said, finally understanding what his coach was telling him. "I hear ya."

"Yeah?" Shelby grinned at him. "So no more Seal-Team-Six-Esque secret missions for VA?"

"No," Jesse laughed, enjoying his coach's unusual silly side. "But you have to admit that it was a pretty good solo operation, huh Coach?"

"Don't push it, St. James," Shelby rolled her eyes, nudging him slightly. "But just to be clear that's all you wanted with Rachel, right? You're not interested in _singing_ with her for _any_ other reason?"

Jesse was puzzled at first but then realized what his coach was really asking.

"Yeah totally," he said truthfully. "I mean don't get me wrong, Rachel's gorgeous and rather talented, but I don't have time for girls right now. I'm a junior and my focus right now is getting a good SAT score and winning a third national championship, so I can get into New York Academy of the Dramatic Arts—in New York—next year."

Shelby let out a sigh of relief. "That's good Jesse, just keep focusing on those things."

"I will Coach. I won't let you down," Jesse promised.

"I don't expect you to be perfect Jesse," Shelby replied. "And also, you don't give yourself enough credit. You're just as talented as Rachel. But not only that, you're forgetting that you have me and your teammates. We don't need anyone else. We've got this— _especially_ with _your_ dedication and _your_ leadership."

Jesse's striking blue eyes widened in shock at the unexpected praise from his coach. Maybe it was Shelby's good mood from the entire day, but she thought it was important to squash Jesse's insecurity. He was usually so confident and although Jesse could be arrogant at times, Shelby thought that his confidence was justified for the most part. He was always the first to practice and the last the leave. He got good grades and was respectful to his teachers and peers. And as much as he'd deny it, he always put his friends and teammates first always willing to help them learn a new song or dance or give them encouragement or advice. None of that went unnoticed by Shelby. His drive—along with the dedication of her entire team—is what helped Shelby build VA into the show choir force that it was today.

"Thanks Coach," Jesse said, still speechless.

"Of course and I mean it. You're more than enough, so no more recruiting people behind my back, okay? Just stick with me St. James, and we'll make sure that you get into New York Academy of the Dramatic Arts—in New York," she joked.

"Okay Coach, no more recruiting," he assured her. "Well, I actually better go. I promised the orchestra kids that I'd take them to Breadstix for performing with me."

Shelby shook her head in disapproval at her student's hijinks.

"Alright, get outta here. But if you tell anyone that I just said any of that to you, I'll deny it," Shelby teased as she turned around swiftly and stormed down the aisle.

Take that for a dramatic exit, Rachel.

* * *

 **A/N:** **As always, I appreciate all the thoughtful reviews. We'll be meeting Shelby's family in the next chapter!**


	6. Chapter 6

Shelby felt _good._ She was getting the best sleep she's had in years. She felt physically less tense and generally more relaxed. She was coming up with ingenious ideas for VA, even for her standards. She was on a roll. She was in such a good mood that she even ended rehearsal early for the first time in almost two-and-a-half years.

Shelby rode the high of meeting Rachel all the way up until she walked into the meeting with the lawyers, when reality promptly slapped her in the face.

Everything had gone well for the most part. They were all in agreement that they would divide joint legal custody three-ways so that they each had an equal share of major decisions-making powers. And joint physical custody would be split between Hiram and Shelby since Leroy had no plans to move back to Ohio, but was promised that he'd get priority during Rachel's school breaks and holidays.

They all agreed on those terms rather quickly, but decided that they would wait to file it in court until they discussed it with Rachel. They didn't want her to feel like she didn't have any say. Hiram and Leroy both assured Shelby that Rachel would approve, and that filing it would just merely be a formality. Regardless, they would all tread slowly, adjust, and work it out so that they had a setup that was in Rachel's best interest.

After all the T's were crossed and the I's dotted, the two men looked over at Shelby in apprehension. She looked up and met their inquisitive gazes.

"So, how do you feel?" Leroy asked first breaking the silence.

"Good," Shelby said truthfully. "And thank you again, both of you, so much, for letting me be a part of Rachel's life. You don't know how much this means to me. I'm going to do my very best to do right by Rachel and make this work."

"Of course Shelby, but you don't have to thank us," Hiram said genuinely. "It's the right thing to do for you and for Rachel."

"And we're a team," Leroy added. "We have your back now. _We'll_ all make it work."

Shelby smiled at the two men in front of her in appreciation. She didn't harbor any animosity towards them for keeping her from her daughter. They only did what they thought was best. Despite their divorce, they had clearly raised a smart, kind, and caring young lady and provided her with a safe and comfortable life, and that's all that Shelby's ever wanted for her daughter. And none of that mattered now, anyway. Shelby was ready to let bygones be bygones. There was no time for dwelling now that she had a new life ahead of her with her daughter.

"Besides, we _know_ you'll be a great mom," Hiram said with certainty.

Maybe it was the conviction in the way Hiram said it. Maybe it was how easily everything played out and Shelby was used to fighting for her life for anything that she's ever wanted. Maybe it was all the sincere faith that the two dads seemed to have placed in her that Shelby didn't feel she deserved yet. But in that moment, the reality of the situation hit her like a ton of bricks. How can she be a great mom if she doesn't even have any experience being a mom at all in the first place?

Sure, she loves Rachel more than anything in the world. She always has. And there's nothing that she wouldn't do to keep her happy, healthy, and safe. She'd even find a way to give her the moon if her daughter asked her for it. But was that _enough?_

Shelby didn't know the first thing about being a mother, let alone being one to a teenager. For all intents and purposes, Rachel was already grown up. And not only that, she already had two parents. Does she really need another one?

Shelby was so caught up in the excitement of it all and how _she_ was feeling that she hadn't even stopped to think about how Rachel would feel. Rachel herself just admitted that it's been a "challenging" year for her. Shelby didn't want their reunion to be another source of stress for her. There was already a lot for the young girl to navigate in the wake of her fathers' divorce and she didn't want to confuse her any further. It wouldn't be fair to throw herself into equation for her own benefit.

"Thanks," she said simply because she didn't trust herself to say anything more in the wake of this new revelation. "Will you let me know what Rachel says tonight when you tell her?"

"Of course," Leroy promised. "We'll call you as soon as Rach goes to bed tonight. Don't worry, Shelby."

 _Too late._ Shelby's insecurity was nearing a level she didn't even know existed. All the years of progress and acceptance and healing that she's worked toward had just come undone.

"So what are your Halloween plans tonight?" Hiram asked, oblivious to the woman's internal crisis.

"Oh, um, I'm going over to my parent's house to help them pass out candy and to see my niece and nephew before they head out to go trick-or-treating," Shelby said distractedly. "I actually better go. We're done here, right?"

Shelby went into autopilot as she gathered her things and said her goodbyes. She spent the drive to her parent's preoccupied with her thoughts. By the time she parked her Range Rover in the driveway, she was in full blown panic mode. Was she doing the right thing?

Before she could wrack her brain for an answer, a loud honk from her sister's car pulling into the driveway behind her tore her away from her thoughts. There was no time to dwell on it because as soon as she got out the car two little monsters almost tackled her to the ground.

"Aunt Shelly!" Shelby's niece and nephew yelled as they crashed into her legs.

"Hey my little bugs!" Shelby said as she crouched down to pull the five-year-old twins into her arms and gave them kisses on their cheeks. "I've missed you! Did you guys get bigger since the last time I saw you?"

"Aunt Shelly, you're silly," Robby said giggling. "We just saw you for dinner on Sunday, there's no way we got _that_ much bigger in _only_ a few days."

"Yeah? Then why are you guys so excited to see me then if it's _only_ been a few days!" Shelby teased as she stood up and ruffled his hair.

"Because mommy said you have candy for us," Lily said as-a-matter-of-factly.

"Did she now?" Shelby questioned as she looked up to see her younger sister Kim trekking up the driveway with bags in hand. "But you don't even have your costumes on. Can you go inside to get changed and come show me? The first one done gets _two_ pieces of candy from me!"

"I don't know where they're running off to because I have their costumes," Kim said laughing as her kids raced inside the house. "You ok? How'd the meeting with the lawyers go?"

"Good," Shelby lied as she took one of the bags from her sister. "You look like you're moving in, what's all this?"

"You're lying," Kim deduced quickly. "But we'll talk about it later? Frannie's coming by to take photos of us with the kids before we head out. I think she's actually already inside with mom."

"Yeah I'm fine, don't worry," Shelby insisted.

"You're so stubborn. But hey, I got you something," Kim said as she pulled out a black witch hat from one of her bags and threw it to her sister. "Thought this would suit you. I think dad might even have some green paint in the garage if you're trying to defy some gravity tonight."

"You're so annoying that doesn't even make sense," Shelby laughed as she caught the hat and shoved her sister through the door.

"Man, no good deed really goes unpunished," Kim said laughing even harder as she entered the house.

"Girls, we're in the kitchen!" Anne Corcoran called out when she heard her daughters walk through the door. Shelby and Kim walked into the bright and spacious kitchen and found their mom standing around the island with their neighbor Judy.

When Judy and Russell Fabray moved in next door almost 30 years ago, they became fast friends with Anne and Robert Corcoran. Their families enjoyed each other's company and they spent many dinners and random holidays together. Consequently, the Fabray's oldest daughter Frannie and Kim, who were similar in age, grew up to be best friends. The Fabrays decided to add to their family 14 years ago when they had their youngest daughter Quinn. With Shelby's permission, Judy and Russell knew about Rachel but Frannie and Quinn did not. The couple were devastated for Shelby and their old friends and the grandchild that they won't be able to see grow up.

"Mom, Shelly hit me," Kim whined as she set her bags down on the island.

"I did not! It was merely a love tap," Shelby argued, moving to give her mom and Judy a quick hug hello.

"You two are worse than Robby and Lily," Anne said rolling her eyes at her daughters' antics.

"You should see Frannie and Quinn go at it," Judy chuckled as she sipped her coffee. "Speaking of which, Kim, Frannie just left to pick up Quinn from Cheerios practice, so she might be running a little late."

"That's alright," Kim said. "We're still waiting for Brian and then I have to get the kids changed first anyway and I'm sure that'll be a process."

"Will you finally tell us what your family costume is?" Shelby inquired. "You've been hyping this up for months."

"Nope," Kim said popping the P at the end. "You'll just have to wait for the big reveal big sis, but prepared to have your mind blown with cuteness overload."

"And you all call me the dramatic one?" Shelby said, shaking her head at her younger sister who stuck her tongue out at her before she walked out of the room in search of her twins.

"Anyway, how's Quinn doing at McKinley?" Anne asked Judy, changing the subject. "Freshman year can be rough. Is she adjusting well?"

"Yeah, I think so," Judy nodded. "She joined the Cheerios I think in part because she wanted to be like Frannie but she also joined the Glee Club? Russ and I didn't even know until she came back the other week from a Sectionals competition that they had apparently won. She seems to really enjoy it. She says she's made some new friends there. We're definitely going to go to their Regionals competition."

Anne met Shelby's gaze at this new information and instantly saw her daughter's body tense up. She moved instinctively and placed her hand on her daughter's back and rubbed it in comfort. They were having a silent conversation with their eyes and Judy immediately picked up on the shift in the mood of the room.

"What's happening?" Judy asked in confusion. "Did I say something wrong?"

A few moments passed and Shelby took a deep breath. "No, it's just that—I saw Rachel."

"What! Where?" Judy said, her eyes widening in shock.

"At that Sectionals competition you're talking about. I was there for work, and I saw her perform with the McKinley Glee Club," Shelby explained. "I'm sorry, I should've noticed Quinn there but I was so caught up with unexpectedly seeing Rachel, and then I ran into her dad. We met up last weekend and, long story short, they got divorced and they moved Rachel back here to Lima. She's also a freshman at McKinley and anyway, they want me to be a part of her life. We just met with our lawyers to go over a custody arrangement."

Judy's jaw dropped at the news. She set her coffee mug down and pulled in Shelby for a hug.

"Shelby, wow," Judy said as she hugged the young woman tightly. "I don't even know what to say, but I'm so happy for you. You deserve this. You deserve Rachel in your life. You're going to be a terrific mother. "

 _There it was again._ That seemingly blind faith to Shelby that she would be a good mom and that she deserved Rachel. _But did Rachel deserve her?_ Tears started to prick at the corner of her eyes and Shelby quickly blinked them away.

Her mother, however, noticed and gave her daughter a concerned look.

"Honey, how did it go with the lawyers?" Anne questioned.

"It went well," Shelby said. "They're going to discuss it with Rachel tonight and tell her about me. We have plans for us to meet on Saturday. But I don't know mom, I just—"

"We're here!" A voice called out from the front door, interrupting Shelby's train of thought. Her mother gave her an apologetic look and silently promised that they'd discuss this more later.

Frannie and Quinn walked into the kitchen completely oblivious to the tense environment they just walked into.

"Mom, Frannie just totally embarrassed me in front of my friends when she picked me up," Quinn complained. "Can you please tell her to be less obnoxious when she gets me from school?"

"Oh c'mon Lucy, it was just Santana and Britt. They don't even count," Frannie said rolling her eyes at her little sister. "Who was the other one that you were talking to, anyway? Is she a part of the Unholy Trinity now?"

"Hey! Mom said you have to stop calling us that," Quinn said, looking at Judy for support. "And she's new. Her name is Rachel Berry and she just moved here from Chicago. She's in Glee Club with us. We were just inviting her to go to Noah Puckerman's Halloween party with us, but she said she had to do something with her dads." Quinn shrugged and Shelby's heart began to race hearing about her daughter.

"She probably just doesn't want to go cause she doesn't want to hang out with you," Frannie teased and her mom smacked her arm to reprimand her.

"Not true!" Quinn replied. "I think she's pretty cool even though she's kind of a know-it-all, but she is really smart and talented. She's probably the best in Glee and she always helps me in bio. Me and Britt like her, but Rachel and Santana don't really get along, even though I don't think Rachel's done anything wrong to her. We invited her so they can get to know each other tonight, but she said she had other plans."

Anne's heart soared hearing about her granddaughter. "That's really nice of you to try to include her, Quinn," Anne said gratefully. "I'm sure she appreciates you trying to be her friend."

"Yeah," Quinn said casually, unaware of how much her actions meant to the older women in the room. "But anyway, she probably won't even want to hang out with me now after seeing how weird Frannie is."

"Stop being a drama queen," Frannie retorted. "Next time, you can walk home then. And besides, you _know_ I'm cooler than you."

"Girls!" Judy began to admonish. Shelby tuned out the rest of the conversation suddenly feeling extremely overwhelmed. She was about to reach her boiling point and needed reprieve.

"Hey, where's dad?" Shelby asked, turning her focus to her mom.

"He should be in the music room," Anne said, understanding that her daughter needed a moment to herself. "Go on and see him, honey. I'll come get the two of you when Kim and the kids are ready."

Shelby nodded in appreciation and walked away to search for her dad.

* * *

As she walked down the hall, she automatically smiled when she heard the piano softly playing. Shelby loved both of her parents with her entire heart equally, but growing up, she had always been a daddy's girl. She got her love and appreciation of music from him. He was a musician once-upon-a-time who studied and trained to be a jazz pianist in college. He had a nascent piano career that was cut short when he fell in love with a schoolteacher from Ohio. It was love at first sight, and they got married within six months of dating. One year later, they had a beautiful baby girl. He traded in his piano and went back to school so he can get a stable job and provide for his family. He worked as an accountant instead for most of his life and not once regretted giving up his music career for his family. It was well worth it to raise two beautiful girls who grew up to achieve their own dreams and found even more success than he ever dreamed of for them.

"Hi Shelly-Bean," her dad said as Shelby stood at the doorway of the music room. When Shelby started to make real money from Broadway, the first thing she did was set up a college fund for Rachel. The second thing she did was pay off her parent's house, renovate it, and built an addition, a music room equipped with a baby grand piano, as a thank you for all their sacrifices. She hoped that it would encourage her father to pick up where he left off.

"How do you do that?" Shelby questioned, crossing the room, and taking a seat at the spot her dad left for her on the piano bench. "How do you always know I'm right behind you when you're playing the piano? It could be mom or Kim."

"Father's intuition?" Robert shrugged and smiled at Shelby. He instantly noticed the worry etched across his daughter's face. "You okay, Shelly-Bean? How'd it go with the Berry's?"

"Good," Shelby sighed, answering the question for the third time. "And bad. I don't know, dad. The Berry's were wonderful. Formally, we decided to share legal custody between the three of us and physical custody between me and Hiram. We're going to play it by ear though to see how Rachel reacts. They're being more than fair, but I'm just so worried. I felt so good about this before, but what if we're not doing the right thing? Rachel's already going through a lot with the divorce, what if adding me into her life is too confusing for her or overwhelming for her?"

Shelby's thoughts were racing at a million miles per minute now. The anxiety that's been building up all afternoon had now settled in full force. She didn't even realize she was struggling to breathe until her dad turned her towards him and looked at his daughter with nothing but love and concern in his eyes.

"Hey, Shelby, will you look at me?" He implored, trying to pull his daughter away from her panic-inducing thoughts. He placed his daughter's hand on his chest and started to take slow and even breaths.

"Can you breathe for me, sweetheart? It'll all be alright, but I need you to relax," he said softly, trying to calm her down before he could quell her fears. "Just follow my breathing. In and out. In and out."

They sat there like that for a few minutes while Shelby tried to regain control of her breathing. Once she felt the anxiety start to dissipate, the tears started to fall. Robert reacted quickly and pulled his daughter into a tight hug, smoothing her hair down and rubbing her back in comfort.

"I'm so sorry dad," Shelby cried into his shoulder in embarrassment. "I know I sound like such a broken record and I know I'm being childish. Look at me, how am I supposed to be a mom to Rachel if I can't even handle this now?"

"Hey now, there will be none of that," Robert reprimanded as he pulled away and began wiping away her tears with his thumbs. He cupped Shelby's face and felt his heart break looking into his daughter's broken eyes that bore so many unresolved feelings. Ever since she was a young girl, his daughter had always been so strong and so unapologetic about who she was and what she wanted. She was strong-willed, naturally intelligent, and wildly talented. And she grew up to be a woman who was the best version of that and more. Robert always thought that Shelby was unlimited. But on the flip side of that, his daughter was also fragile and vulnerable. Of his two kids, she was the one who always felt things so deeply. She always reacted faster and more intensely than other people did. Shelby loved bigger, cared bigger, and experienced life bigger. As much as that was one of her greatest qualities, it was also one of her greatest downfalls. Because of this, she's always felt obligated to save people, to fix things, to make it better. Robert knows it's what led his daughter to agree to be a surrogate for the Berry's in order to help him, to save him. He could never repay his daughter back for the sacrifice she made for him. And he'll never forgive himself for the 13 years they spent apart, but he would move the heavens and the earth right now to help his daughter realize that this was the right thing to do. He knew unequivocally that she was going to be an excellent mother to Rachel, and Shelby just needed a push understanding that.

"Look at me Shelby, and listen to me very carefully," Robert demanded. "Will you care for and provide for Rachel?"

"Of course," Shelby said with no hesitation.

"Will you protect her and guide her?"

"As best as I can."

"Will you put her needs first? Above your own or anyone else's?"

"Always."

"Do you love her?"

"More than I can bear," Shelby said, her voice breaking.

"Then it's the right thing to do, sweetheart," Robert said truthfully. "You answered all of that without any doubts. Just because you haven't been in Rachel's life doesn't mean that you haven't been a mother this entire time. You've been caring for her, protecting her, putting her first, and loving her since the moment she was born. You've been a _great_ mom this entire time, Shelby. I know you're scared and I know you're worried if you're doing the right thing or if it's what best for Rachel, but that feeling doesn't really go away. That's being a parent. You are her mom and there's no doubt in my mind that she needs you and that you can _only_ bring nothing but joy into her life. You understand?"

Still feeling a bit overwhelmed, Shelby only nodded, slowly letting her dad's words sink in.

"You're also not giving yourself or Hiram and Leroy enough credit," Robert continued. "Don't you think that her dads, who have known Rachel and have raised her for 13 years, know and understand what she needs best? And if they say that it's you, that you should trust them?"

Shelby nodded realizing that she hadn't even thought about that. The Berry's have been telling her this entire time that this is what their daughter needed. They were trusting her. She was the only one who wasn't listening and didn't trust herself.

"And not only that Shelbs, but it's okay to feel scared, it's okay to feel overwhelmed," he said, wiping away the last of Shelby's tears. "But please don't feel like you're ever alone in this. We're all here for you. And luckily for you, you have two amazing moms in your life to help you learn the ropes. Me and your mom and Kim will all help you and Rachel make this work. We'll all figure it out, together. You don't have to be perfect, sweetheart. You just have to try."

Shelby started crying again but this time from the fullness she felt in her heart realizing that her dad was right. There's nothing she couldn't do if she had the support of her family and if they believed in her, she also had to believe in herself. Shelby wrapped her arms her father's neck and hugged him fiercely.

"I will," she promised. "Thanks, dad."

Robert kissed his daughter's forehead and wiped away her tears for the last time. "I meant every word," he smiled kindly. "No more tears. This is a wonderful thing for all of us, so don't act like it's anything less. I can't wait to meet Rachel. I already love her so much."

"She'll love you too," Shelby assured him.

"Thanks, sweetheart," Robert said as he patted her leg. "So what do you say we go find the others? Kim promised me something about cuteness overload."

"Yeah," Shelby said giving her dad a genuine smile for the first time that afternoon. She got up and couldn't help hugging her dad again. He always knew the right thing to say or do. Shelby would be lost without him. "You're going to be an incredible grandfather to Rachel."

"And you'll be an even better mom," Robert said as he put his arm around her shoulder and led her out the room.

"Hi! I was just coming to get you," Anne said as she ran into her husband and daughter in the hallway. She quickly examined Shelby and noticed her watery eyes and tear-stained cheeks. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah, Shelly-Bean is going be just fine," Robert answered for his daughter. Anne looked at her for confirmation and Shelby nodded and gave her a small smile.

"I love you guys," Shelby said in appreciation.

"We love you more, honey," Anne said as she tucked Shelby's hair behind her ear. "We're here for you. Always."

"Mom! Dad? Shelly! Are you guys coming?" Kim called out from a distance.

"We better let your sister get this show started," Robert said laughing.

They entered the foyer and were stopped by Frannie who was holding her camera.

"I was told to make you guys wait here for their grand entrance," Frannie said shepherding the three Corcorans to the middle of the foyer so they had a perfect view of the staircase.

"How does Kim always con you into her shenanigans?" Shelby asked amused. "I hope she's paying you for your services today."

Frannie was a professional photographer and owned a successful studio in town. "She already gave me a bag of Reese's as a down payment," Frannie said.

"Are you guys ready?!" Kim called from the second floor.

"We're literally all just waiting for you," Shelby said impatiently. "Hurry up!"

"Okay! Frannie, drum roll please!" Kim yelled. The kids were giggling as Frannie started to drum roll on her legs.

"Presenting.. in a Corcoran-Jennings family production.. 'For the First Time in Forever'.. Kim and Lily as Princess Anna and Queen Elsa of Arendelle!" Kim's husband Brian announced from the second floor.

Music started playing and Kim appeared at the top of the stairs dressed as Princess Anna with Lily in hand dressed as Queen Elsa. Shelby's heart burst with happiness at Lily who was wearing Elsa's signature sparkly blue dress and was sporting a braid complete with a tiara. When the little girl got to the foot of the stairs, she promptly twirled around in her dress and curtsied in front of the adults. A chorus of 'Awws' broke out across room.

"Next up… we have everybody's favorite snow friend who doesn't have a skull or bones, but loves warm hugs.. Robby as Olaf!" Brian announced again. Robby walked down the stairway next dressed up in a fully-decked out Olaf costume. When he got to the bottom of the stairs, he crossed the foyer, hugged Shelby, and said, "Some people are just worth melting for." _Touché Kim, cuteness overload indeed._

"And finally.. he's the hottest iceman around even though he thinks 'Reindeer Are Better Than People'.. we have Brian as Kristoff!" Kim said, taking over the emceeing from her husband who started walking down the stairs stopping to strike silly poses for the kids, all the while Frannie was focused on taking her expert shots.

"Okay, okay," Shelby said laughing. "That was epic. You all look incredible."

"Heck yeah we do," Kim said clearly pleased with herself. "I think this even beats the time dad made us dress up as Star Wars characters and he made you be Darth Vader."

"But Shelly-Bean was such an adorable Sith Lord," Robert teased pinching his oldest daughter's cheek.

"Our family is so ridiculous," Shelby said laughing, her spirit lifted by all the love and happiness surrounding her.

"And we can't wait for Rachel to join it," Anne said excitedly. The four of them looked at each other and nothing more needed to be said. Shelby knew right then and there that she needed to let go of her fears and simply trust that everything would be okay.

* * *

 **A/N:** **Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed meeting Shelby's family! Rachel** **and Shelby will finally meet "formally" as mother and daughter in the next chapter.**


	7. Chapter 7

Shelby stood in front of the mirror examining herself in her third outfit that morning. At this point she's tried on a skirt, a dress, and the current outfit she had on was a slacks and purple blouse combo complete with her signature heels. It was too 'Coach Corcoran' for her liking, and the first two outfits gave her 'Shelby Corcoran, Broadway Actress' vibes.

She kicked off her heels and sighed in frustration as she walked into her spacious walk-in-closet for the hundredth time that day. She needed an outfit that said 'Shelby Corcoran, Rachel Berry's mom.' She knew she was overthinking it but it was distracting her from the nerves.

When Hiram and Leroy called Shelby the other night, they told her that Rachel had taken the news very calmly. Rachel confessed to her dads that she had always wanted to know who her mom was, but was too afraid to ask because she didn't want to hurt their feelings. Shelby felt uneasy about that because if there was anything that she knew about her daughter—from what she's heard and from the brief interaction she's had with her—she was anything but _calm_.

Leroy assured her that Rachel's subdued reaction was probably just shock and that the young girl just needed some time to process. The only encouragement that Shelby had to hold on to was the fact that Rachel had apparently agreed to meet Shelby for brunch without any hesitation.

Still, something didn't feel right to Shelby. She couldn't have guessed how Rachel was going to react, but she would've taken a little excitement or even some outrage than the alleged solemn reply she had given. That, to Shelby, could mean anything. Maybe she was angry at the news or maybe she was elated but didn't want to offend her fathers. Or worse, maybe it meant indifference. Maybe Rachel just didn't care and she only agreed to meet her out of curiosity.

Shelby shook those unpleasant thoughts out of her head before she could spiral. Either way, whatever Rachel was thinking, she would find out soon enough. She looked at the clock and realized that she had to leave the house in the next five minutes if she wanted to be on time.

Picking up her pace, she grabbed a pair of dark wash jeans and a stylish gray sweater from her closet. She put it on and slipped into a pair of ankle boots. She examined herself in the mirror one more time and smiled. _There_. It was simple, comfortable, and she finally looked like herself.

She grabbed everything she needed and ran out of the house in record time. She hated rushing, but she also couldn't hold in the excitement anymore. As nervous as she was, she was also beyond eager to finally be reunited with daughter.

* * *

Not wanting to be alone with her thoughts in fear of psyching herself out, she turned on the satellite radio and clicked the preset for the Broadway station. "Mama Who Bore Me" from Spring Awakening immediately started playing and Shelby let out a small laugh at the irony, feeling slightly attacked by the universe. _Ok then, news talk radio it is._

Shelby pulled up outside the Berry house 20 minutes later and cut the engine. She looked up at the two-story brick house lined with a white picket fence and felt a sudden rush of emotions overcome her. The last time she was here was the night before she gave birth to Rachel. So much has happened since then, and so much will happen in the days to come. Shelby allowed herself a second to compose herself before getting out of the car and walking up to the front door.

Right as she was about to knock, the door flung open and Shelby met Hiram's surprised face.

"Hey! Sorry! Didn't mean to scare you," Hiram apologized noting Shelby's startled expression. "You're right on time, but Leroy's running a little late and I actually was just about to run out to the store to grab some more coffee. We're out and I think we'll need it," he joked.

Shelby smiled realizing that Rachel's nervous habit of rambling definitely comes from him.

"That's alright! Do you want me to go and get it? I don't mind. I brought some orange juice and blueberry muffins I made this morning but unfortunately no caffeine," Shelby shrugged as she lifted up the bags in her hand.

"No, of course not! Please come in and make yourself comfortable," Hiram moved to let the woman inside the house. "I'll be really quick. I think Rachel's still up in her room getting ready. You can go up and see her, she's actually in your old room or stay down here and wait? It's totally up to you."

Shelby's heart rate picked up at the suggestion and she took a second to weigh her options.

"Thanks. Yeah, I think I'll go up and see her," Shelby said, leaning into the sudden burst of courage she felt.

"Ok great! Well I guess you know your way around, but do you want me to come up there with you?" Hiram questioned, picking up on the new mom's slight hesitation.

"That's okay," Shelby said. She's not scared of her 13-year-old daughter. Or at least she shouldn't be. "I'll just drop this off in the kitchen and then go say hello. It'll be fine," Shelby said more for herself than Hiram.

"I know. She's going to love you, Shelby."

Shelby nodded and gave him a grateful smile for his encouragement. Once the door closed behind him, she took a deep breath and made her way to the kitchen. Another wave of emotions hit her as she walked through the house. They made so many memories here together. Good ones, Shelby noted. As much as this what about her reunion with Rachel, Shelby was also glad to have Hiram and Leroy back in her life. They were all friends once and she was hoping that they could go back to that.

After she put away her food, she started to make her way to the second floor. Shelby furrowed her brow in confusion as she got closer to Rachel's room. She swore she could hear herself speaking.

"I am so incredibly proud to be in a musical that celebrates women and celebrates their strengths and their differences. To be in the company of these women this evening is just a dream come true for me. Thank you so much."

When she got to the top landing, she immediately spotted Rachel through the open door sitting at her desk with her back turned away from the hallway. She was watching Shelby's Tony Award acceptance speech on her laptop.

"And April Rhodes, you are the grace and the light on that stage every night. This is something that we built together and I love you," a young joy-filled and emotional Shelby continued.

Shelby smirked in amusement and leaned her slender body against the frame of the door, deciding that she'd wait until the end to let her presence be known.

 _"Thank you with all my heart to everyone on the cast, crew, and creative team who has had so much faith in me and kicked my butt into this role. I truly love what I do and it's because of all of you. But the biggest thank you tonight belongs to my family. My parents Anne and Robert Corcoran and my sister Kim are here tonight. Thank you for giving me roots, for believing in me even when I felt like the biggest loser, and for teaching me how to fly. I love you guys so much. And finally, to the little girl that's always in my heart and continues to inspire me every single day. This is for you. This is for us. Thank you."_

"You know," Shelby said, clearing her throat as she walked into her daughter's room. "I was talking about you."

Rachel jumped up in shock at the unexpected interruption. Her heart racing, she quickly turned around and came face-to-face with her mother.

"Sorry!" Shelby apologized, feeling guilty for frightening her daughter. "I didn't mean to sneak up on you. The door was open. I just got here and your dad left to grab some coffee."

"Oh that's okay, I was just—" Rachel instantly blushed realizing that she just got caught cyberstalking Shelby on the internet. "Sorry, what did you say? You were talking about who?"

"You. In my Tony speech, the little girl I was talking about was you."

Rachel's face broke out into an interested smile and Shelby cheered internally at the positive reaction.

"Really? I always thought you were talking about yourself and that you were thanking the little girl inside of you. You know, the one that's always dreamed of being on Broadway and winning a Tony. I mean, that's what I read in one of your interviews," Rachel confessed, her hand instantly moving to cover her mouth realizing that she just outed herself again. She couldn't help it.

"No," Shelby said unfazed and took another step closer towards her daughter. "I guess that's what I told reporters but it was _always_ about you."

"Oh," Rachel said meekly while shifting the weight on her feet.

Shelby looked at her daughter in front of her and wondered if every time she saw Rachel that it would always feel like it was the first time. She was so beautiful. It took her breath away.

Shelby reached out and tucked a stray hair behind Rachel's ear. "Hi," Shelby said softly, looking into her daughter's deep brown eyes.

"Hi," Rachel replied.

"I'm your mom."

"Yeah. You're my mom," the young girl repeated as she sat down on the edge of her bed.

Shelby couldn't discern what Rachel was thinking but took that as a cue to join her and sat down next to her. She took a moment to look around the room and noticed the bits of her personality that covered it, from the playbills tastefully displayed on the wall to the worn-down ballet flats sitting in the corner and the Jane Austen novels that lined her bookshelf. This was Rachel. There was so much she had to learn about her daughter and that thrilled Shelby more than anything else.

"How do you feel?" Shelby asked, tentatively placing her hand over Rachel's on the bed.

"I'm—I'm not sure," Rachel said honestly, meeting her mother's questioning green eyes. They were so full of unmistakable love and concern, the young girl had to look away.

"That's okay," Shelby assured her while she absentmindedly rubbed a soothing pattern on the back of Rachel's hand with her thumb. "Do you have any questions for me?"

"My dads told me about the contract, did you ever regret signing it?" Rachel asked in a small and hesitant voice.

Shelby moved her head to see her daughter's downcast and nervous eyes and felt her heart constrict at the complicated question.

"Yes and no," she said truthfully. "But that's a difficult question to answer, Rachel. I have never regretted being a surrogate for your dads. But I wasn't ready to be a mom. I was so young."

"And because you wanted to be on Broadway?"

"That was a part of it, sure. I guess I needed the chance to fulfill my dreams, but I also needed to give you the chance to grow up in a comfortable and stable home."

A few moments passed and Shelby could practically hear the wheels turning in her kid's head. She knew she had to take the lead on this.

"Let me ask you something, Rachel. I know this may seem like a broad question but would you say that you had a good childhood? So far?"

"Yes," Rachel said without skipping a beat.

"And would you say that your fathers gave you everything that you've ever needed?"

Rachel nodded her head. She didn't have to think too hard about it. She knew she was lucky. Not only did she get everything she's ever needed, she also got almost everything she's ever wanted. From the singing and dance lessons to the plethora of animal sweaters in her closet, her dads rarely said no to her. Though it's not to say they're complete pushovers, they were also strict when they needed to be and had set firm boundaries for their daughter. More often, though, they were so loving and kind and attentive. They were the best dads a girl like Rachel could've ever asked for. Everything was perfect. Until they got divorced.

"That's great Rachel," Shelby said in a faraway voice. "Because that's all I've ever wanted for you. I couldn't have provided for you in the way that your dads have."

"But you were so successful," Rachel questioned her logic. It's not that she didn't trust her mother. Fundamentally, she understood her reasoning. But she was just so confused. If Shelby loves Rachel the way that she, and even her dads, claims she does, then why didn't she fight for her? Or try to break the contract anytime in the last 13 years? Why does she only want to be her mom now? And not last year when she really needed her or any of the years before that? She's been trying so hard during the past couple of days, but she couldn't really wrap her head around it.

Shelby could sense the girl's doubts and didn't blame her. She sighed knowing that she had an uphill battle to climb to help her daughter understand the decisions and the sacrifices that were made. Shelby knew that it would be a struggle and that there's no way Rachel would really be able to comprehend the why's until she was a mother herself. But it wouldn't be fair to dismiss her daughter's doubts just based on that. Whatever Rachel was feeling was valid and Shelby had no right to question that. She would just simply have to help her work through it and explain, in the best that she can, that every choice that was considered and every decision that was made was done with her best interest in mind.

"Rach? Will you look at me?" Shelby asked, subconsciously using the girl's nickname.

The teenager reluctantly turned her head to face her mother. Shelby grabbed both of her hands and held onto them. Rachel couldn't help but feel comfort instantaneously. Once she had her daughter's full attention, Shelby gave her a small smile.

"Eventually, yes, I did find a lot of success," she began to explain. "But what you were just seeing with that speech or whatever you were reading on the internet was the other side of a long string of failures. It was a result of a lot of hard work, more rejections than I can count, and so many difficult, sometimes very painful, sacrifices. Maybe some people would say that I got lucky in my career, but I would say that it wasn't luck but a lot of hard work and perseverance. Especially in the beginning, I was living paycheck to paycheck, getting barely five hours of sleep every night, working three jobs, spending hours commuting because I was actually living in Jersey and couldn't afford to live in Manhattan. It was a lot of no's and closed doors and wondering if I was good enough to make it. It often meant being alone and being away from my family and my friends, being away from you. And I'm not saying it wasn't worth it, Rachel. I _love_ what I do. And I'm so beyond grateful that it did work out for me, but it wasn't without struggle and it wasn't without hardship. If it was easy, maybe we could've been together. I don't know, Rach. But that wasn't the right environment to bring a baby into. You deserved everything and as much as I would've wanted to, and I did, _so badly_ , I wasn't in the right place in my life to give you all that you needed. And I am so sorry about that, but I promise you that I am ready now. If you're willing to let me be in your life, if you're willing to let me be your mom. I'm more than ready now."

Rachel was hanging on to every word that Shelby said. She was letting it sink in and she was slowly starting to understand. But that still didn't make it hurt any less. She can tell that her mom loves her. She can hear it in her voice and see it in her eyes, but she was so torn between leaning into it or running away from it. Maybe it would've been easier if her mom had turned out to be a complete stranger. But instead her mom was Shelby Corcoran. And as happy and as excited that it's made her, she also couldn't help but feel cheated. She was always right there and yet she never had her. But she didn't know how to tell her mom that yet. It was all still too overwhelming.

Rachel didn't realize that she was crying until Shelby began to tenderly wipe away her tears. It was such a soft and loving gesture that it only made the young girl cry even harder. Without even thinking about it, she flung herself into her mother's arms. Shelby instantly pulled her daughter close and hugged her tightly.

"Oh, my baby. It'll be okay. We'll be okay," she promised, rubbing soothing circles on her child's back. Shelby held on for a few seconds waiting for her daughter to calm down. Once she felt Rachel's tears start to subside, she pulled away and looked over her with concern.

"I'm sorry," Rachel said wiping away the last of her tears. As confused as she was and despite all of her conflicting emotions, Rachel was certain about one thing and being in her arms confirmed it: she needed her mom. "And yes."

"What, Rach?"

"I want you to be my mom."

Shelby let out a breath she didn't even know she was holding and pure joy coursed through her body. She gently stroked Rachel's hair away from her face and kissed her forehead.

"Thank you, Rachel. Thank you so much."

Rachel melted into her mother's touch and found herself wrapped up in another hug. It felt so natural. They stayed in that position for a little while, neither one willing to let go, until Rachel's stomach let out a loud grumble interrupting the moment.

"Sorry," Rachel said, reluctantly pulling away. "I went for a run earlier and I haven't had anything to eat since then."

"Then let's go get you something to eat," Shelby decided. There would be more time to discuss everything later. But right now, she needed to feed her kid. "I think your dads are probably downstairs by now. Should we go look for them?"

"Yeah," Rachel said as she got up but paused momentarily. "Can I meet you down there though? I think I just—I need a second."

"Sure Rach," Shelby nodded. She can almost feel the girl's distress and wanted to pull her into her arms again but held off noticing that her daughter needed space. "I'll see you downstairs."

* * *

As soon as Shelby walked out into the hallway, a flood of intense emotions rapidly hit her. She held onto the wall and took a deep, centering breath. Shelby knew that she was strong. Her parents raised her to be. And her life experiences have taught her how to fight and be tenacious. But anytime it was about her daughter, anytime Rachel was thrown into the equation, she always felt so uncertain and vulnerable and like ground beneath her was crumbling. However, she couldn't let it all get away from her now, not anymore. She needed to step up and be strong now for not only herself but also for her daughter. It's what they both needed.

When Shelby walked into the kitchen, she found Hiram and Leroy puttering around and setting up the table. Shelby watched the two men for a moment and noticed how effortlessly they moved around each other. Hiram grabbed plates from the shelf as Leroy closed the cabinet door behind him. It was like a dance, one that only they were only able to perform after years of practice and learned behavior. Shelby felt her heart sink thinking about their broken marriage.

"Hi, Shelby," Leroy said noticing her first. "How'd it go up there?"

She walked into his open arms and accepted his hug.

"She says that she wants me to be her mom, but I think she's really confused," Shelby said, holding on to him a little longer than planned. Leroy responded with a comforting squeeze in acknowledgement.

"Yeah," he agreed as he pulled away. "We were just talking about that. We tried talking to her again last night, but she was still pretty stoic and insisted that she was fine. And that's unusual, because she's usually so.. theatrical?"

"I mean we talked a little and I think I can gauge some of what she's feeling," Shelby replied. "But I didn't press because I don't want to overwhelm her anymore than she already is."

"Well, I think that unless the other shoe drops, we just have to be patient and give Rachel some more time to process," Hiram added a voice of reason. "I know she'll come around."

Shelby nodded in understanding but felt her stomach tighten. She wasn't expecting a run into each other's arms in slow motion type of reunion and expect that everything would be perfect. Life didn't work that way. She knew there would be some hesitation on Rachel's end. She would be surprised if there wasn't. She also knew that there would be a steep learning curve for the both of them as they worked each other into their lives. But Shelby underestimated how lousy it felt to have your kid hurting and that you're partly to blame.

"Hey," Rachel said, interrupting Shelby's thoughts. The three parents whipped their heads towards the door and watched Rachel timidly approach them standing around the kitchen island.

"Good morning Rach," Leroy said pulling her into a quick side hug. "Are you hungry? I think we're about just about ready to eat."

"Yeah, I'm starving," she said as she examined the spread on the table. "I'm so excited, this all smells and looks delicious. Me and dad have just been eating cereal for breakfast all week."

Shelby and Leroy simultaneously shot Hiram a disapproving look. He gave them a sheepish smile and playfully nudged Rachel towards the breakfast nook.

"Alright, narc. Let's get some real food into your poor, famished body then," he joked. "Didn't hear you complaining about my cereal bar when you finished the last of the Fruit Loops yesterday."

Rachel laughed and it instantly lifted some of the tense mood. They all sat down and began to eat their meal together. Shelby was initially worried about the awkwardness of it all, but soon relaxed after casual and easy-going conversation naturally flowed between the four of them. They indulged in the food and enjoyed each other's company. It felt so comfortable and Shelby wondered if this is what it would've always been like if she had fought for custody of her daughter.

"This is delicious, Shelbs," Hiram said as he took a generous bite out of her blueberry muffin. "Like, I'm seriously impressed."

"He's only impressed because the last time we saw you bake anything we walked into so much black smoke filling the kitchen and the oven that we couldn't even see the cake you were baking. Eventually the smoke cleared up a little and we saw that the cake had overflowed from the pan and it was dripping black cake goo all over the coils."

"And don't forget the flames," Hiram added. "What happened again, Shelbs? Where did you go when you forgot about the cake you were baking?"

"I got distracted listening to my new Céline Dion album I got that morning," Shelby confessed, turning beet red as the table broke out into laughter. "But hey! If I recall, you two ate it all anyway. You said you liked its elusive smokey taste."

"Yeah but dad will eat anything, he's a bottomless pit," Rachel chimed in before taking a bite of her own blueberry muffin. "This is really good though, Shelby. Blueberries are my favorite. Especially blueberry pies. Daddy makes the best. You're going to make some for Thanksgiving, right?"

Shelby didn't miss the quick look the two dads shared or that Leroy instantly tensed up at the question.

"Well, darling. We wanted to actually talk to you about this later," Leroy said while straightening up in his seat. "But I actually don't think I'll be able to see you for Thanksgiving this year."

"What? What do you mean?" Rachel questioned. "We always have Thanksgiving together, where will you be?"

"In Chicago, with your Gram and Gramps," Leroy explained. "You know that they only have me and that they're not well enough to travel and you have such a short break, so we thought that you'd just stay here with your dad. You can see your uncles and cousins. Or maybe even spend it with Shelby?"

Leroy looked at Shelby for support but all she could do was nod. They hadn't discussed it yet and she didn't want to overstep. The mood of the room rapidly shifted and she sensed her daughter was on the verge of a meltdown. Shelby swallowed thickly waiting for Rachel's reaction.

"We can do whatever you want Rach," Hiram said trying to appease their daughter. "It's all up to you."

"No it's not," Rachel mumbled in exasperation.

"What was that, Rach?" Leroy asked as he reached out to grab her hand. The teenager instantly recoiled at his touch.

"I said, _no_ it's not," Rachel said, her voice rising as she swiftly pushed her chair back and got up from the table. She turned to her parents with an irate expression. "How can you even say that when you guys keep making all of the decisions without asking me what I wanted? What if I wanted to go to Chicago with daddy? What if I wanted to see Gram and Gramps? What if I didn't want to do anything at all for Thanksgiving? Or better yet, what if I wanted to meet my mother anytime before oh, I don't know, today? Nobody asked me! And now you're all acting like I have choices when let me tell you, it doesn't really feel like I do. You're all getting divorced or signing contracts without caring about how I'd feel about it!"

"Rachel Barbra! That is enough," Hiram said in a dangerously low and serious voice. "I understand that you are upset, but there is no need for you to raise your voice or speak to us in that way."

"Rach, will you please just sit back down and we can all talk about this together? Leroy asked calmly, trying to diffuse the situation between his daughter and ex-husband. They were both so hot-headed and temperamental.

"No, father," Rachel said calmly. "Because like you guys have always taught me, if you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all!"

Rachel promptly turned on her heels, stormed out of the room, and stomped up the stairs in anger.

 _At least she believed in self-preservation enough to not slam her door,_ Shelby thought.

"Wow," Shelby said letting out a breath. "There goes that shoe drop."

"I wouldn't say drop, more like descending at a million miles per second," Hiram corrected as he rubbed his temples, trying to alleviate the headache he felt coming.

"Does she always do that? The storm outs?"

"Since she could walk," Leroy answered. "I mean don't get me wrong, Rachel's a good kid and we usually don't have any issues with her behavior. But she sometimes struggles with not getting her way. We've been trying to talk to her about better ways to express her displeasure than the dramatic exits."

"Which, by the way, get less dramatic every time she does it," Hiram pointed out.

"Are we doing the right thing?"

"Of course we are Shelby," Hiram said with no hesitation. "We're her parents. Rachel may feel like she doesn't have any choices, but everything we've done has always been for her and to protect her. And I'm not going to let our daughter gaslight us into thinking otherwise."

"She just needs more time," Leroy said echoing his ex-husband's earlier sentiments. "This reaction makes sense. We just have to help her through it."

"Do you mind if I go talk to her?" Shelby inquired. "If that's okay."

"Yeah, of course," Hiram replied. "You're her mom Shelby, you don't have to ask us for permission."

Leroy nodded in agreement. "Maybe we should take a breather anyway. Hiram and I can put things away here and you can go up and talk to Rach. Maybe go for a walk or something?"

"Good idea," Shelby said getting up from her seat. "Any words of wisdom?"

The two men looked at each other and laughed.

"You'll be fine mom," Leroy chuckled. "Just remember that you're the parent and you're the one in charge."

"Yeah and make sure you protect yourself from those big doe eyes," Hiram added.

Shelby rolled her eyes at their teasing and walked away to search for her sullen child. She got up to Rachel's room and took the open door as a good sign. Shelby knocked anyway trying to respect the teen's privacy.

"Rachel? Can I come in?"

Rachel walked out of her bathroom with a glass of water in hand. She was shocked to see Shelby standing at the door completely expecting one of her dads to come and lecture her for leaving. She averted her mom's gaze feeling embarrassed. She didn't want her mom to see that side of her so soon, but she couldn't help it. It was all too much and she didn't know how to cope.

"Sure," Rachel said nervously.

Shelby picked up on the girl's apprehension and gave her a soft smile. She watched Rachel take a short sip of water from her gold star cup before setting it down on her desk and Shelby's heart swelled realizing that Hiram and Leroy must've kept their promise. However that feeling quickly turned into concern deducing that the girl must be upset if she's drinking out of it.

"I'm sorry for storming out. And for yelling," Rachel blurted out. "I know it was disrespectful and I know it wasn't the right way to express how I'm feeling. I just got frustrated and didn't want things to escalate, so I left. I am sorry."

Shelby smirked at Rachel lecturing herself. _At least she sounds remorseful._

"Thank you for apologizing," Shelby said gratefully. She was glad that Rachel realized what she did was wrong. It saved her from having to be stern with her daughter. Not that she would shy away from it if she had to, but they did just meet. "I think you owe your dads an apology as well."

Rachel nodded and walked around her mother to get to her closet. She grabbed a jacket off the hook and put it on.

"I will," she said while adjusting the zipper. "But if you'll excuse me, I have to go now."

"Where are you going?"

"I was thinking I'd go for a walk," Rachel said as she slipped into a pair of Mary Jane's. "You know, clear my head a little bit. The weather outside is lovely."

"Great idea," Shelby agreed. "I think I'll join you."

"No thanks, I'd rather go alone," Rachel said. It's not that she wanted to push her mom away, she just still felt overwhelmed with so many conflicting emotions, she just needed a second to process them on her own.

Shelby gently grabbed her daughter's arm as soon she started to walk away.

"It wasn't really up for debate, Rach. I'm coming with," Shelby said sternly. "I think we should talk."

Rachel's shoulders slumped and she let out a frustrated sigh.

"Fine. If you insist," she acquiesced. She started to walk away again but Shelby turned her around and pulled her into a hug. She felt a little better instantaneously.

"I insist," Shelby said kissing the top of her head. "Now please go downstairs and tell your dads we're going on a walk. I will meet you down there."

"Okay."

"And please don't forget to apologize."

"Okay, okay," Rachel groaned. "You know, for someone who just became a mom, you're already scary good at bossing your kid around."

"What can I say, I'm a quick learner," Shelby teased as Rachel walked out of the room.

* * *

Ten minutes later, Rachel and Shelby were walking down the street in comfortable silence. Rachel was right. It was a beautiful day. Although it was the beginning of November and the weather had consistently started to fall, it was an unusually warm and sunny day, and it seemed as though everyone was out to enjoy the last bit of agreeable weather before winter came in full force.

They walked for a little while longer until Shelby started noticing Rachel stealing glances of her from her periphery.

"What's up, Rach?"

"Oh—uh, nothing. I was just wondering, you said you wanted to talk?"

"Yes, I did." Shelby answered. She wasn't trying to be short or cryptic, she just hasn't decided how she wanted to play this yet. She knew that Rachel was probably dealing with emotional overload, so she had to tread carefully.

"I already said that I'm sorry," Rachel said dropping her head. Her stomach was churning not knowing where her mom was going with this conversation. Did she change her mind already? Did she not want to be her mom anymore after seeing her blow-up earlier?

"I know baby," Shelby said looking over at her repentant child. She took her hand and gave it a comforting squeeze. "And it's okay, you're forgiven. It's just that—and I really need you to listen to me here Rach—me and your dads, we understand that you're going through a lot. We know that this is a lot for you to handle. It would be for anyone. And we don't expect you to accept everything right away or be okay with everything. It's okay to feel frustrated or upset. But you need to talk to us, Rachel. We can't read your mind. We don't want you to feel like you're being backed into a corner with no choices—and we will talk about that another time. But we just want to help Rach, and we can't do that if you don't tell us how to. You don't have to shoulder all of this alone. You understand?"

And Rachel did understand. But of course it was easier said than done. At the same time though she knew that it wouldn't be fair to shut her parents out and that it wouldn't resolve anything, so she also knew she had to try.

"Yes, I understand," Rachel said truthfully.

"Great, so no more bottling it in and insisting that you're fine and that everything is fine? You'll _really_ talk to us if there's anything on your mind? Because all we want is for us to be honest with each other, Rach."

"Yes," Rachel repeated. "I'll try."

"Thank you," Shelby said sincerely while she linked her arms with her daughter and pulled her close as they continued their walk. "I appreciate that. That's all we ask. We just want to help you work through all of this in the best way that we can, so if there's anything you need, just let us know."

Rachel nodded and felt some of her anxiety dissipate. She felt better knowing that she didn't have to be perfect for her parents, especially for her mom. She also felt relieved knowing that they were okay with her taking her time to process everything.

"Shelby?"

"Hmm?"

"I actually kind of do need something," she said hopefully.

"Anything, Rachel."

"Can we please get ice cream?" Rachel said smiling as she pointed to the ice cream shop down the block. Shelby laughed and nodded her head.

"Of course, I can always go for some strawberry ice cream."

"Hey! Me too! That's my favorite flavor," Rachel said in awe.

Shelby looked over at her kid and wondered if putting a smile on her face would always feel this incredible.

"Then let's go get us some ice cream then, baby. Sorry.. I forgot to ask if that's okay? That I call you baby?" Shelby asked curiously.

"Yeah," Rachel said without thinking about it and gave her mom another encouraging smile. "I kinda like it. A lot of my friends' moms call them 'baby' and you're my mom right? So yeah, it's okay."

Shelby's heart soared at the acknowledgement and she placed another kiss to the top of her daughter's head. She couldn't argue with that logic.

* * *

 **A/N:** **Thanks for reading and for all the reviews! I really enjoy hearing what you guys think and always consider your suggestions.**

 **The next chapter is a lot more of Rachel and Shelby learning how to navigate their new relationship and some Rachel shenanigans with the Glee kids.**


	8. Chapter 8

"Shut up, Puckerman!" Rachel growled. "This isn't some government conspiracy, it's show choir. Shelby is not acting as a double-agent to try to poach me for Vocal Adrenaline. That doesn't even make sense!"

"I'm just calling it as I see it," Puck replied coolly. "I just find it highly suspicious that she's trying to reconnect with you the moment we won Sectionals knowing that VA has to go up against us at Regionals. She's spooked, Berry. And you're probably going to jump ship."

"Forget glee club for a second," Kurt chimed in "I just can't believe that your _mom_ is _the_ Shelby Corcoran. I have an iPod Shuffle dedicated exclusively to selections from 'Wicked.' This is amazing. Can you get me an autograph, Rachel?"

"Yeah I'm not even gonna lie, 'Defying Gravity' is a little too vanilla for me, but damn can she sing," Mercedes added. "I'm gonna need you to ask her for some tips on how to belt too, Berry."

It's been a little over a week since Rachel met Shelby formally. It was now the following Monday and Rachel impulsively decided to share her news with Quinn as they walked into school that morning, which Kurt overheard in the hallway and proceeded to divulge to Mercedes, who promptly told Tina and Artie, who passed it along to Brittany and Santana, the latter of whom complained about it to Puck, who happened to mention it to the rest of the football guys.

By the time lunch came rolling around, the glee club was in anarchy discussing the bombshell revelation. Most members of the New Directions had come straight to the choir room during the lunch hour to get the scoop directly from Rachel. Half of them were accusing Shelby of using the young singer for Vocal Adrenaline purposes and the other half were starstruck and wanted the lowdown on the famous Broadway star.

Rachel, internally, was in chaos. She hasn't fared any better since the brunch with her parents. If she was being honest, she had completely turned on her promise to be open with her mom and dads about how she was feeling. Instead, she's dug herself into an emotional hole that seemed to grow more abysmal with every passing day. Logically, Rachel knew that all she had to do was discuss any of this with any of her parents and she would probably feel better, but for some reason she couldn't bring herself to talk to them.

Rachel had a great time with Shelby the day they had brunch. After they got ice cream, they camped out on the couch and watched a Barbra Streisand double feature that afternoon, which was mostly Rachel and Shelby acting out all the parts and singing to each other around the living room, much to the amusement of Hiram and Leroy. Then, they went out to dinner at Breadstix, just the two of them, and Shelby patiently answered every question Rachel had about theatre and Broadway. It was perfect. Rachel hasn't had that much fun since before the divorce and definitely since before they moved. Being with her mom was easy and comfortable. She can definitely tell that Shelby is strict and tough, but she also had such a warm, fun, and loving personality. Her mom was so much better than she could've ever dreamed of and it made her so happy and so sad at the same time. But lately, it frustrated Rachel more than anything else and that frustration was rapidly turning into anger.

She still can't comprehend why everyone thought it was okay to keep them apart. It's not like her parents all hated each other. They were friends. Why couldn't she have had all three of them in her life this entire time? And it's not to say that her dads weren't enough, but Rachel also couldn't lie and say that she never once wished she had a mother. There were so many times growing up where she needed a mom. There were so many times just in the last year where she stayed up at night and thought about the one thing that she was missing. She knows that her parents all thought they were just doing what was best for her, but she still can't help feeling like she was robbed. And as furious that it's made her, it's also made her feel unbelievably guilty.

Shelby was being really wonderful and patient and yet Rachel spent the last week shutting her out. It's not that she was doing it on purpose, she was just so overwhelmed and didn't know how to process anything or how to begin to navigate this new relationship with her mom. So, she's adopted her go-to strategy of repressing all of her emotions like she had been doing since her life fell apart with her fathers' divorce. It was an Oscar-worthy performance in Rachel's opinion. But it was becoming increasingly difficult for her to play the part. She knew she was on the precipice of losing control but she didn't even know where to begin to walk it back.

She hasn't seen her mom since the day they had brunch. Shelby got her number before she left that night and they've been texting occasionally. Shelby also called her every night to ask her about her day and to say goodnight. Maybe it would've annoyed any other teenager, but in all honesty, Rachel loved it. She relished in the good morning texts and the inquiries of how her day was going. She also really enjoyed speaking to her mom at night and her voice being the last thing she heard before she went to sleep. Shelby had also invited her to go out this past weekend and they made plans to go to dinner and a movie Saturday night, but Rachel canceled last minute. She didn't intend to but her dad left for Chicago that day and saying goodbye to him always felt like getting punched in the gut. She still wasn't used to being away from him. But of course, instead of just telling her mom that, she lied and told her she was sick. And as she was laying in bed feeling sorry for herself, Quinn randomly asked to hang out that night and Rachel agreed deciding that maybe it'd help for her to talk to a friend about everything that was going on. However that plan went out the window when Quinn also invited Brittany and Santana to come to the Lima Bean with them.

The next day, she felt so awful about lying to her mom that she ignored all of Shelby's texts. She almost didn't pick up her call last night but her craving for her mom's attention won out. She wished she hadn't though because Shelby sounded incredibly concerned on the phone yesterday. She even asked Rachel if everything was okay between them. She sounded so sad that Rachel had to quickly placate her and hang up before she could start crying.

This morning, she woke up in a cold sweat feeling sick to her stomach and bouts of intense nausea keep hitting her. Maybe it was karma for lying about being sick but she knew that it was more likely the stress that was rapidly mounting. Everything felt like a 20-foot wave was crashing into her. Repeatedly. Trying to find something to hold on to, she precipitously told Quinn about finding out that Shelby was her mom. However, that turned out to be just another one of Rachel's glaring mistakes in the last week. Instead of receiving comfort from her new friend, she was getting a public interrogation from the glee club, and she didn't even have any idea on how the news had spread that quickly.

"I, for one, could care less if Israeli Pippi Longstockings jumped ship to join her mommy on VA," Santana said, effectively pulling Rachel away from her thoughts. "That's a betrayal I'd welcome _any_ day."

Quinn and Brittany instantly shot their carelessly blunt best friend a disapproving look and Santana shrugged in response.

"What? I just try to be really, really honest with people when I think that they suck. You know? No one gets it."

"That's not nice, San," Brittany replied. "But we don't have to worry about that because you're not going anywhere, right Rachel?"

They all looked at Rachel curiously but the team's star singer froze. She's been so wrapped up with all of her other conflicting emotions that she hadn't even stopped to think about how her and her mom were in rival glee clubs and how they had to compete with one another.

"Well maybe Rachel won't even have a choice," Artie pondered. "You know, I heard a rumor that Coach Corcoran makes Vocal Adrenaline practice for eight hours every night with only one five-minute break to chug a Red Bull. She's ruthless. She could just force Rachel to join VA against her will."

Rachel felt her entire face heat up all the way to the tips of her ears. She was trying to keep her cool but she was fuming now.

"No," Quinn interjected quickly, sensing Rachel's impending blow-up. "Shelby's not like that all. Yeah she's a hardass, but she wouldn't force Rachel to do anything she doesn't want to do. She's actually a really nice person."

The entire club, Rachel included, whipped their head to look at Quinn in surprise. Rachel felt like the rug was just pulled out from under her.

"You _know_ Shelby Corcoran? Like personally?" Kurt said in amazement. "How is everyone connected to this woman?!"

"Um—yeah," Quinn admitted nervously as she shifted anxiously on her feet. "Shelby's sister Kim and my sister Frannie are best friends. The Corcorans are our neighbors and our parents have known each other forever."

Shelby? Quinn was on a first name basis with her mom? Their families know each other? Rachel was blindsided. When she told Quinn her news earlier her friend gave her an incomprehensible look and hastily promised that she'd talk to her about it later.

"You've been living next door to a celebrity your entire life and you didn't think to tell me?" Santana questioned.

"Well Shelby doesn't live there," Quinn explained. "Her parents do but our parents are really close and we all have dinner and stuff together sometimes. And Shelby and her family are really private and my parents always warned me about sharing stuff about them with other people. I don't know, anyway, that's not my point. I'm just saying that Shelby is a regular person and she's actually pretty cool, so I don't think she's going to be forcing Rachel to do anything."

Perfect, Rachel thought. Quinn doesn't only know her mom, but she knows Shelby's entire family as well. She can add jealousy to her already overflowing bottle of emotions.

"Yeah, but I wish she would," Santana said dejectedly.

"Guys quit it," Finn said diplomatically. "Give Rachel a break. She just found out who her who mom is and I'm sure she's not even thinking about switching glee clubs or anything."

He gave her an apologetic look and she smiled at him appreciatively. Apart from Quinn, Finn and sometimes Kurt were the only ones who have tried to get to know her. He stopped a rogue slushie from hitting her during the first week of school and he's been sort of looking out for her ever since.

Moving to Lima and starting high school at McKinley has been a rough adjustment for her, to say the least. Rachel knows that she has a _unique_ personality and that she can, at times, be borderline overbearing. But she can't help it. She is who she is. And she wants what she wants. And that was fine in Chicago where she had a group of friends that she grew up with who had grown to understand her and accept for better and for worse. But she didn't have that in Lima. It was such a small town that everyone has been friends and have known each other since pre-school. She definitely felt like an outsider and she knew that she didn't mesh well with a lot of her peers.

She spent most of her first month here with her head down and mostly kept to herself, until her Spanish teacher Mr. Schuester asked her if she was interested in joining his newly-formed glee club. Rachel was in the auditorium one day rehearsing selections from the seminal classic, "Les Miserables," and he walked into her singing "On My Own." He asked her to be New Direction's team captain on the spot. She agreed heeding her dads encouragement to get involved in extracurricular activities and figured that maybe she'd be able to make a friend or two who at least enjoyed singing and dancing like she did.

A week or so later, she was performing at Sectionals. Ever since then and especially since they won, Rachel went from walking the hallways alone to her teammates stopping by to say hi to her at her locker. Quinn also started hanging out with her more. They had glee and a few classes together and they kind of clicked naturally. Rachel would say that she's probably her only real friend at the moment. She knew most of the team probably just saw her as an acquaintance and the rest most likely just tolerated her for her talent. Either way, joining the New Directions was the first thing in Lima that's given her joy and has made her feel excited again. Performing "Don't Rain On My Parade" in front of a packed auditorium and unexpectedly winning with the New Directions pulled Rachel out of the haze that she felt like she was living in since she left Chicago. She was finally starting to feel like herself again. And she didn't want to mess that up.

"No, I'm not going anywhere," Rachel decided. The entire room shifted their gaze to the brunette who finally spoke up. "My allegiance is with the New Directions and I'm not going to let Shelby or anyone else convince me otherwise."

 _There._ Rachel doesn't want to dwell on it anymore. Rachel Barbra Berry was a lot of things, but one thing that she is most definitely not is a quitter. She knew she started something with the New Directions. She could feel that they were building something special together and she didn't want to walk away from that now. Not for Shelby, not for anyone else.

"I'm not buying it," Puck countered, squinting his eyes at Rachel in suspicion. "We're screwed."

"Same," Santana readily agreed. "Prove it to us. Prove to us that you're really on our side and that you're not just going to go and run your little hobbit legs off to go join your mom's team the first chance you get."

"How!" Rachel yelled in frustration, her anger rising. "Me and Shelby haven't even talked about show choir! She hasn't even asked me to join her team. How do you want me to prove it to you? What do you want me to do?"

A few members of the New Directions took a step back at Rachel's rightful outburst. Quinn swallowed thickly not liking where this was leading.

"I know!" Puck said excitedly. "You can go and do some deep background on Vocal Adrenaline. You know, do some recon, to see what they're up to for Regionals."

"Puck, man, you gotta lay off the spy movies," Finn said trying to rein in his friend. "Rachel's right, it's not that serious, it's just show choir. And Mr. Schue's not going to like it if he finds out we're spying on other teams."

"Shut up, dude. Spy movies are awesome. And I don't know about all of you—I mean yeah, we're good, but us winning Sectionals was also kind of a fluke. We had no idea what we were doing and we're not going to get to the next level by randomly letting Rachel belt out show tunes and singing Journey songs. We need all the help we can get to win Regionals, and I've already sacrificed too much of my reputation for us to be a one-hit wonder team."

"I never thought I'd say this," Artie said carefully. "But Puck's right. I've been reading the national show choir message boards and if we want to win, Vocal Adrenaline is _the_ team to beat. Coach Corcoran is no joke. Everybody's been saying that they have a third national championship in the bag— _since June_ and they hadn't even won their second national title yet. Not to mention, they've got the support to do so with their crazy booster club. I mean get this—everybody on VA got Range Rovers last year for winning Regionals."

"Mr. Schue once gave me a loose tic tac that he found on the bottom of his bag," Brittany said casually.

"Ew Britt, what?" Santana grimaced. "But Wheels and Puckerman make a lot of sense. _I've_ put in too much effort at this point for us to go back to losing. I want to win. Whatever it takes."

The rest of the team broke out in chatter amongst themselves and Rachel felt like the room was spinning. As much as she'd hate to admit it, Puck and Santana had a point. They wouldn't win it all unless they started being strategic and competitive. She'd been telling Mr. Schue for a few weeks now that they were being too complacent and had to be more cutthroat and innovative. Of course, now that her teammates were catching on, they were willing to throw her under the bus in order to push the team forward. This is _not_ what Rachel had in mind when she shared her news with Quinn this morning.

"Alright, so me and Puck decided that you should try to sneak into Vocal Adrenaline's rehearsal today Berry," Santana proclaimed loudly over everyone else's conversations. "And we think that you should be the one to go and gather information for us because one, you're small and dwarf-like, so it'll be easy for you to sneak around and two, if you get caught, I don't know, just bat an eyelash or something and I'm sure your new mother would be more than willing to forgive you."

"Santana, stop," Quinn protested. "Rachel, you don't have to go and prove yourself. That's dumb. We're not some cult. Besides, Finn's right and we shouldn't be spying on other teams. Shelby wouldn't like that and we'll probably get in trouble with Mr. Schue."

"Whatever, I'll do it," Rachel decided. She was tired of arguing about it. "But! Someone has to come with me because I'm not going to face the wrath of Shelby Corcoran alone if we get caught."

"Rachel, wait. Please stop and think about this for a second," Quinn pleaded. She was trying so hard to get her impulsive friend to see reason. "I don't think you understand, I _know_ Shelby and she really won't appreciate the sneaking around."

"No, Quinn!" Rachel barked. "I know you and my mother are apparently best friends, but I'm going and it'll be fine, and we can use whatever I find out to help us win Regionals. Whatever it takes, right."

Quinn winced at the hostile reply and Rachel felt bad immediately for yelling. She knew she was thinking irrationally at this point but she was also being fueled by an overflow of emotions, mainly the jealousy she still felt over the fact that the one and only friend she made here of course had to have a relationship with the mother that was kept from her for 13 years. It hurts Rachel that Quinn can say with certainty that she _knows_ what her mom does or doesn't like and that she can't. Even though she knows it's just common sense to realize that her mom definitely won't appreciate the sneaking around, but still. It was the principle of the thing for Rachel. And against her better judgment, she was genuinely curious about what Vocal Adrenaline was up to.

"I'm sorry," Rachel apologized, lowering her voice and looked at Quinn for forgiveness. "I know you're just looking out for me Quinn, but I don't know, it'll be fine, right? We won't get caught."

"Famous last words," Mercedes whispered to Kurt.

"Fine," Quinn groaned. "You're so stubborn, but I'll come with. I think you'll probably need a witness for when Shelby kills you."

"Great," Rachel replied happily and she looked over at the rest of the team. "Anyone else?"

Everybody instantly stepped back with the exception of Puck, Santana, and Mercedes.

"Totally would but can't," Puck said. "We have football practice right after school, so you're going to have to go on on this operation without me. Let's all meet back here tomorrow morning though so we can debrief."

"And as much as I would like to see this end in an inevitable disaster, I also can't come since I have detention after school for throwing a slushie in Jacob Ben Israel's creepy little face," Santana shrugged. "No regrets."

Quinn and Rachel looked at Mercedes, the last woman standing, who was sporting a huge smile on her face.

"Oh you can bet your ass that I _need_ to see how this plays out," Mercedes said with a hint of amusement in her voice.

"How are we even going to get there?" Quinn asked, pointing out a flaw in their plan. "None of us can drive and I don't think there's a bus that runs to Carmel."

"I don't know, we can just Uber," Rachel said without thinking about it.

Quinn groaned internally and realized right then and there that her new friendship with Rachel was undoubtedly going to land her in more than just this one sticky situation in the future.

* * *

Over at Carmel High School, Coach Corcoran was on a warpath and nobody was safe. Members of Vocal Adrenaline have been spreading the word of their Coach's dour mood all day. It only happened once in a blue moon but the team had an alarm system in place to warn one another because nobody wanted to be a casualty of Shelby Corcoran's legendary fury.

Members of the well-known team were extremely perplexed. Their coach had been in such an unusually pleasant mood recently and even canceled their bi-monthly Saturday practice this past weekend. It was the first time it had ever happened since Shelby took over VA. They all spent the last weekend speculating their coach's change of demeanor. Not that that they thought their coach was necessarily mean. Contrary to popular belief, VA members knew that the lore that followed Shelby Corcoran around was overblown. Yes, she was often intense and expected nothing less than perfection but they knew that was only because nobody believed in them more than their coach did. And that she would support them endlessly to achieve their goals. She was sincerely devoted to her students and in return they were wholeheartedly faithfully to her and readily worked to deliver excellence. In the past couple of weeks, they had noticed a shift in their coach. She was less disciplined and more easygoing. Even weirder was the fact she was being more generous with her praise than normal. More members of VA have received a smile or a "good job" from their coach in the last week than they had in the past two years.

They were all anxiously waiting for the other shoe to drop. And drop it did this morning when Jesse and Giselle were two minutes late for their private co-lead rehearsal and Coach Corcoran had apparently given them a brutal tongue-lashing about the importance of respecting people's time. Allegedly, Giselle had to skip first and second period because she couldn't stop crying.

It was now the afternoon and they had a full dress rehearsal for their Lady Gaga number. The nervousness was running high across the whole team. Shelby had started rehearsal off with an unexpected lyric check and dismissed anyone who got the the words wrong. Three VA members were already sent home and they were only 20 minutes into practice.

"Claw, claw, up, clap, clap, and five, six, seven, eight," Shelby ordered as she inspected her team's dancing. "And one, two, three, four—"

 _Something was off._

"Okay, okay. That's enough," she barked at her team to stop.

 _Frustrated_. Shelby was frustrated. And not necessarily with her team, though she thought they were performing too rigidly for her liking. And not even with Rachel, who was the source of her less-than-stellar mood at the moment. She was frustrated with herself and the situation she was in with her daughter.

Her kid was giving her emotional whiplash and it was slowly taking its toll on her. Things between them were up and down and Shelby felt like she was being played like a yo-yo. Not that she was complaining, she'd take a rollercoaster ride with Rachel any day if it meant having her daughter in her life. But it seemed like every step forward they were making was also met with two steps back, and Shelby felt like Rachel just sprinted more than a dozen steps back this past weekend.

In her opinion, their initial meeting went well, her daughter's blow-up included. Rachel seemed to have genuinely enjoyed herself and Shelby considered it one of the best days of her life. She knew she had to be patient and allow Rachel to set the pace of their relationship, so she stuck with her game plan of texting and good night calls. Something as simple as hearing about her kid's day meant the entire world to her. And she thought that Rachel was responding well to the keeping in touch. However, towards the end of the week, the more time lapsed between texts and the shorter their calls became.

Tired of their virtual relationship, Shelby invited her to go out together this past Saturday and was thrilled when Rachel accepted. She even canceled VA practice in order to allow herself to spend as much time as possible with her daughter. Rachel, however, also canceled at the last minute claiming that she was sick. Fueled by a mother's concern, she picked up medicine and soup to deliver to her sick child. She was on her way to check in on her when she got a call from Kim who excitedly shared that she just saw Rachel hanging out with Quinn when her and Frannie stopped by the Lima Bean for a coffee. Shelby asked her sister if Rachel looked sick and Kim said no and proceeded to fawn over how much the mother and daughter looked alike. Shelby felt like a knife just pierced her heart hearing Kim's information.

Not only did Rachel essentially ditch her, she also willingly lied to her. Shelby had been a mom for a week and her kid was already lying to her. _What did that say about her as a parent?_ She was trying to be empathetic to how her daughter was feeling but it was also awfully difficult not to let her insecurities affect her. Shelby thought that she was doing a good job getting to know her daughter. Although they weren't talking about the heavy-hitting topics, Rachel had been communicative and seemed eager enough to get to know Shelby as well. Evidently, she was wrong.

It only took that one phone call to burst her short-lived reunion bubble and let reality sink in. Although she knew better, it didn't take long for her to fall back into her familiar patterns of self-doubt and vulnerability. As much as Rachel had to learn to accept her, Shelby also had to adjust to her new role as a mother but she was struggling. And the ever-perfectionist Shelby Corcoran did not do well when she struggled.

Still, she knew that it wasn't fair for her to be lashing out on everyone around her. A healthy dose of Coach Corcoran fear was good and necessary to push her team but she knew she was walking a fine line with the anxious energy her kids were exuding. It was now time for her to walk it back.

"You guys aren't getting it," she sighed, deciding to shift gears instead of spending the rest of rehearsal barking orders.

"You're letting the costumes do all the work," she began her lecture. "Theatricality isn't about the crazy outfits. It's not enough to douse yourself in gasoline—you have to light yourselves on fire to make it work! It doesn't mean that you have to be a nuclear explosion. It can be like a quiet storm. You just have to radiate emotion, express what's deep inside you. _That's_ what theatricality is truly about."

VA was listening carefully to their coach's sage advice, but they were all still too intimidated to respond. She made a quick decision to adopt an age-old teaching method: show don't tell.

"Do I have to show you?" Shelby asked rhetorically and waited for her team to hustle off the stage. Once she was alone, she looked over at the band. "Funny Girl. E-flat."

Shelby walked to center stage and took an even, steady breath. Whenever things were more than she can bear, she always found solace in music and signing. Shelby's not sure in what she believes in spiritually, but she knew that the stage was her church. It grounded her. It was where she wholeheartedly felt like she belonged.

" _Funny._

 _Did you hear that?_

 _Funny._

 _Yeah the guy said 'Honey, you're a funny girl.'_

 _That's me_

 _I keep them in stitches_

 _Doubled in half_

 _And though I may be all wrong for a guy_

 _I'm good for a laugh."_

Shelby sang slowly and passionately. She surrendered herself to the music and let it transport her somewhere else. She felt everything wash away with every note she sang. Her blurry lines, her messy life always came into focus while she was on stage.

On the receiving end, every single person in the auditorium was captivated by Shelby's singing. She sang meaningfully and expressively. She was truly an astonishing performer.

As she got to the end of the song, Shelby walked towards the front of the stage and looked out into the grand auditorium. She swore she saw movement in the balcony. She looked over at the first two rows on the ground level and all of her kids were accounted for. She furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. Shelby knows the Carmel auditorium like the back of her hand. She's spent more time here than she did anywhere else since she moved back home. She lives, eats, and breathes in this space and she knows when something in here feels off. When she finished the song, she looked up at the balcony level again and definitely saw shadows.

Her VA students began to clap politely, impressed by their coach once again. Shelby gave them a grateful smile in return for their praise.

"Alright guys, we'll discuss what I just talked about in a little bit," Shelby instructed. "Take a five minute break and we'll pick up where we left off."

Shelby walked off the stage and went over to her director's table. She picked up her cell phone and looked at the one new notification. She instantly smirked at the message.

She pocketed her phone and calmly walked down the aisle to exit the auditorium. She pushed open the doors and started to inspect the hallway. She picked up her pace and walked over to the stairs to get second level. As soon as she got to the top landing, she came directly face-to-face with three immensely shocked girls.

Shelby instinctively placed her hand on her hip and countered back with an amused expression.

"Hello, Rachel. Quinn," she simply greeted the two obviously startled teenagers. She turned her gaze to their friend and stuck out her hand.

"I don't believe we've met, I'm Shelby Corcoran," she shook the equally stunned girl's hand. "But I do believe that the three of you are a long way from New Directions practice."

* * *

 **A/N:** **Hope you guys enjoyed this! We'll** **see the aftermath of Rachel's actions in the next chapter and a bit of a breakthrough in Shelby and Rachel's relationship.**


	9. Chapter 9

"Are you going to have us arrested, Ms. Corcoran?" Mercedes asked in a panicked voice.

Rachel elbowed her fearful friend and stood her ground.

"We're not doing anything illegal," Rachel said with certainty as she met her mother's inquisitive gaze for the first time. "Stealing ideas is not a crime. Shelby can't arrest us."

Quinn winced at Rachel's gall and prayed to a God out there that Shelby was in a forgiving mood today.

Shelby raised an eyebrow at Rachel's brazen attitude and also prayed to a similar God for the strength to deal with her obviously defiant child today.

"No one is getting arrested," Shelby said diplomatically. "But I would like to know what the three of you are doing here."

Mercedes and Quinn shared an alarmed look and at least had the forethought to look guilty. Rachel, on the other hand, appeared to be calm and collected.

The three teenagers fidgeted anxiously but no one said anything. Shelby inhaled a calming breath trying to be patient. She made a game-time decision to sweat them out. A few tense moments passed and the silence between the four of them intensified. Shelby could wait all night if she had to.

"We came to spy on VA," Quinn blurted out. "We wanted to see what you guys were up to for Regionals. We know we shouldn't have but we're really sorry."

Rachel immediately glared at Quinn. It's not like they had discussed a plan of what to do or say if they got caught, but still. Her friend gave them up so quickly.

"And once we saw you were doing Gaga, we were going to leave right away but then you started singing and damn," Mercedes added quickly. "You're like _really_ good."

Shelby looked over at her daughter who still remained silent and stoic. She let out a loaded sigh. Her mom always warned her that she'd get a child who was as stubborn as she was. Rachel was that. In spades.

"Rachel?" Shelby stared at her daughter intensely, willing her to respond. She met Shelby's eye-contact for a nano-second but then looked away.

"It's not like we we're going to actually steal your ideas," Rachel said defensively as she crossed her arms. "We were just curious to see what you guys were up to. We're not going to copy you."

Shelby shook her head and pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration.

"Does Mr. Schuester know that the three of you are here?"

"No," Quinn replied. "He has no idea we came here."

"And how did you all get here?" Shelby asked, even though she already knew the answer. She snuck a peek at Rachel whose face broke out into realization.

"We took an Uber," Quinn said.

 _Crap,_ Rachel thought. She totally forgot that her dad's account was linked to her Uber app. He must've texted Shelby that she was headed to Carmel when he got the notification. Rachel's panic began to rise slowly realizing that she had not thought things through.

"And I assume that none of your parents know that you're here?"

Quinn and Mercedes timidly shook their heads no and Rachel looked down at her feet. Shelby paused to check her phone and saw that her break was almost up. She strategized quickly.

"Alright here's what we're going to do," Shelby said, shifting to her hardass Coach Corcoran alter-ego. "I am going to go downstairs to dismiss my team. The three of you will stay right here. I will be back in five minutes, and then I think we need to have a little talk."

She spoke slowly and evenly and looked directly at Rachel to make sure that her daughter was understanding her. Rachel must've taken the hint because she finally started to look a little remorseful.

"I mean it," she said with a bite in her voice that made all three girls flinch. "Stay right here. In case you have any ideas, I know where every exit is on this side of this building. And just because I'm wearing heels, doesn't mean I won't be able to catch you."

Shelby turned around sharply and walked down the stairs before the three frightened teenagers could reply. They all let out a collective breath once they stopped hearing the resounding click of Shelby's heels.

"You know," Mercedes said shaking her head. "Just gonna say that this was _not_ worth it."

"Agreed," Quinn said. She was so wrapped up with how Shelby was going to react if they got caught that she hadn't even stopped to think that she would probably tell her mom. She shuddered thinking about Judy Fabray's infamous disciplinary methods.

"Why do you think she's making us stay up here?" Mercedes questioned.

"Probably cause it's easier to just push us off the balcony," Quinn replied anxiously. She looked over at Rachel who was looking more and more terrified by the second.

"What _do_ you think that Shelby's going to do to us, Quinn?" Rachel asked nervously, her resolve breaking.

"I don't know, probably call Mr. Schue and our parents?" Quinn speculated. "Maybe hang our heads on top of the VA stage to make an example out of us?"

"Artie told me that she makes her students do musical suicides," Mercedes trembled. "Y'all. I'm not really sure what that means, but I sure as hell do not want to find out."

Rachel was freaking out. She forgot that she doesn't just have to deal with Shelby Corcoran, Vocal Adrenaline Coach. She has to face Shelby Corcoran, her new mother, who also just caught her lying and sneaking around. She swallowed at the thought and her throat suddenly felt so dry. She needed a game plan. Today was not the day for her life to end. She had so much to live for.

Quinn and Mercedes both turned their attention to Rachel who appeared to be preoccupied with inspecting the hallway.

"Don't even think about making a run for it Rachel Barbra," Shelby said threateningly.

All three girls jumped in shock at Shelby's abrupt return. She gave her daughter a warning look that sent a chill down Rachel's spine.

"We're really sorry again, Coach Corcoran," Mercedes pleaded for mercy.

Shelby examined the antsy troublemakers in front of her and smiled to herself. She's barely even began to admonish them and they were already repentant. Damn. She was good.

* * *

Twenty minutes later, three sufficiently contrite teenagers sat in front of Shelby as she leaned on the front of her desk in her office with her arms crossed.

She just finished giving them a paralyzing lecture on their impulsive transgressions. She needed them to understand that it is absolutely not acceptable for them to be bending the rules, sneaking around, and going places without permission.

"I will not tolerate it," Shelby said sternly. "And on one last note, I'm not sure if the three of you realize that you just put the New Directions' reputation in jeopardy. I kept you upstairs because I didn't want my kids to see that you guys were out here spying. It's dishonest. And yes, Rachel is right, and spying is not a crime, but it is cheating. How would you guys feel if VA members came sneaking around to your rehearsals? We all need to play by the same rules, otherwise it ruins the integrity of the competition. Do you all understand?"

Quinn, Mercedes, and Rachel simply nodded. They were still too dazed to say anything else after a debilitating Coach Corcoran scolding.

"Good," Shelby said satisfied. "Now, I spoke with Will and he said he'd take care of your punishment tomorrow. The last thing we need to do is call your parents."

Quinn's eyes bugged out at the last part of that statement.

"Shelby, do we really have to?" Quinn began to argue. "I mean I'll happily take Mr. Schue's punishment, but I don't think it's necessary to tell _my mom_."

"It absolutely is necessary to tell her," Shelby said amused at the girl's uneasiness. "You know your mom's going to find out one way or another, Q. There's no need to delay the inevitable."

Quinn slumped her shoulders in defeat and Shelby smirked in understanding. Judy Fabray was a not a mama bear that you wanted to poke. She leaned over and gave the poor girl's arm a comforting squeeze.

Rachel watched the interaction between the two intently and flinched. The familiarity between them and even Shelby using Quinn's nickname triggered her. In that moment, everything just hit Rachel like a freight train. Her perfect storm of emotions began to rain down on her. Rapidly and intensely. She felt a pang in her chest and heart rate start to escalate. The ground beneath her was crumbling and Rachel felt like she was falling hard and fast.

She stood up abruptly and everyone in the room turned their head to look at her. Shelby's heart dropped to her stomach looking at Rachel's distraught expression.

"Rachel?" Shelby asked worriedly.

Rachel met her mom's soft green eyes that pierced into her with concern. Her breath hitched in her throat and her stomach gave out on her.

"I just—" Rachel struggled to speak. She didn't understand what was happening. Her heart was pounding so profoundly she felt like it was about to come out of her chest. "I need to go to the bathroom."

Rachel sprinted out of the room before Shelby even knew what was happening. The purest form of worry coursed through her body watching her kid run away from her. _Something was wrong. Was it her scolding? Did she take it too far?_ Shelby was rooted to her spot in shock. The slam of the bathroom door down the hallway thrust her back into the moment.

"I—stay right here," she instructed to the two equally confused girls. "Let me go check on Rachel."

Shelby walked down the small hallway in haste and stopped outside the door of the private bathroom she shared with the band director. Without thinking about it she twisted the doorknob to try to open the door but found that it was locked. She heard the water running and knocked.

"Rachel? Are you okay?"

Silence.

Shelby's stomach twisted in on itself in worry. She knocked again, harder this time.

"Rachel, please answer me," Shelby demanded.

A few more moments passed and Shelby felt adrenaline rush through her. She'd break the door down if she had to. She raised her fist to knock again.

"I'm fine," Rachel said in a breathy voice and cleared her throat. "I'm sorry, I'm okay. I just need a second."

Shelby paused for a moment and didn't know what to do. Obviously, Rachel wasn't fine but she also couldn't just go in there guns ablazing. She had a key but she didn't want to use it. She opted to give her daughter privacy. She'd have to come out sooner or later.

"Okay," Shelby agreed warily. "Are you sure, Rach?"

"Yes," Rachel replied immediately. "Sorry, I'll be right out. I'm okay—I promise. Just please?"

Shelby hesitated a few seconds but then walked away reluctantly before she can change her mind. As much as she didn't want to, she had to respect her daughter's wishes.

Inside the bathroom, Rachel was struggling to control of all of her raging emotions. Every unpleasant feeling she's repressed with her fathers' divorce, the move to Lima, her reunion with Shelby was hitting her wave after wave after wave. She gripped the edge of the sink tightly. Breathing was hard. Really hard. The blood pounded in her ears. Her heart thudded in her chest. Rachel didn't realize it in the moment but she was just experiencing her first panic attack.

She felt her legs give out and she instantly fell to the floor. She leaned back against the wall and subconsciously wrapped her arms around her knees, placed her head on her legs, and curled up in a ball as if she was protecting herself from the harrowing storm of emotions pouring down on her.

She needed to focus on something else, anything else. With a shaky hand, she quickly pulled out her phone and turned up the volume loud enough so that only she can hear it. She scrolled until she found what she was looking for and hit play.

"For Good" started playing and Rachel used every ounce of her energy to concentrate on the familiar melody. She willed herself to reclaim control of her breathing and took slow and even breaths as she listened to the music. She focused on every word, especially the ones her mom sang, and let the comfort of it wash over her. She stayed in that position for a while and by the time the song finished the second time through, she felt the intense panic slowly start dissipate and was replaced with a numbness that overcame her

Rachel waited a few more seconds until she felt her heart beat drop back down to a normal rate. She stood up cautiously and tested her balance. She looked at her phone and realized that she's been in the bathroom for more than 15 minutes. She needed to get it together before her mom came barreling in here. She was not prepared for Shelby to see her like that. She quickly washed her hands, splashed some cold water on her face, and fixed her hair. Once she was satisfied with how she appeared, she turned around and carefully opened the door.

As soon as she entered the hallway, a pair of arms engulfed Rachel into an affectionate hug. Shelby pulled her daughter close and Rachel molded into her. She tentatively wrapped her arms around her mom and inhaled deeply. Her mother's scent of warm vanilla tickled her nose and provided a calming effect on her.

"I don't know what's going on in that head of yours, but I love you Rachel," Shelby whispered softly. "And everything will be okay. I promise you that."

Shelby pulled away and examined her incomprehensible daughter. Rachel felt tears prick in the corner of her eyes but she blinked them away fiercely. She was not going to break down again.

"I'm okay," Rachel insisted as she pulled away. "I'm sorry. I'm fine. I just didn't sleep well last night and I guess I feel kind of off right now. Where's Quinn and Mercedes?"

Shelby looked at her child dubiously but decided to let it go for now. Rachel clearly didn't want to talk about what just happened and this wasn't the right time or place.

"They're still waiting. Judy is coming to pick them up to take them home. She's actually nearby and will be here soon, so I'm going to walk the girls down. Do you want to wait in my office?"

Rachel nodded.

"Is my dad on his way to come get me?"

"No," Shelby paused. "He has to work late on a deposition, so you'll have to come home with me until he can pick you up later."

"What? No!" Rachel said in alarm. "Can't I just go home with Quinn? And Mrs. Fabray can drop me off?"

Shelby winced at her daughter's pleading. _Was she really that bad?_

Rachel noticed her mom tense up at her mini-outburst and felt bad immediately. It's not that she didn't want to go home with her mom. She's been curious about where Shelby lived and what her home-life was like, but she was just so emotionally drained all she wanted to do was go home and crawl into bed.

"Sorry," Rachel said apologetically and leaned into her mom. Shelby opened her arms to her in confusion. _Emotional. Whiplash._ "I've just had a long day and I just _really_ want to go home."

Shelby rubbed her daughter's back in comfort and kissed the top of her head.

"I know baby," Shelby said sympathetically, holding her tightly. "All that rule breaking and sneaking around can _really_ take a toll on a person."

Rachel laughed at her mom's teasing but felt her stomach churn remembering that she was still in murky waters for her misdeeds.

"So I'm still in trouble, huh?"

"Big time, young lady," Shelby said, pleased at how mom-like she sounded.

* * *

After an irate Judy picked up Quinn and Mercedes, Rachel begrudgingly got into the car with her mother. She was so worn out at this point that it was causing her to be notably irritable. She was desperate to go home. She was still dealing with the residual effects of her slight breakdown and just wanted to be alone.

"What are we going to do at your house?" Rachel asked curiously.

Shelby frowned. She didn't want it to just be her house. She wanted it to be _their_ house, _their_ home.

"Dinner and then I think we need to talk," Shelby said without any elaboration.

"But I'm vegetarian, will you have ingredients for a vegetarian meal? Can we go out somewhere to eat?" Rachel asked hopefully. Her mother was less likely to kill her if there were witnesses around.

"I know you are Rach. Luckily for you, I also like to eat sustainably."

Rachel sank back down in her seat at her mother's rebuff.

 _Learning how to drive. Going to prom. Moving to New York. Winning a Tony._ These were all things she was going to miss after Shelby was through with her.

"What do we even need to talk about? You've already lectured us," Rachel whined. She couldn't help it. The entire day, the entire week, the entire month, the entire year, _everything_ was weighing down on her and she knew that with one more push that she was bound to snap. Again. And this time Quinn and Mercedes weren't around to distract her mom.

Shelby sighed. Yes, she did reprimand Rachel already but only as Coach Corcoran. She also needed to talk to Rachel about her wrongdoings, but as her mom. Against her better judgment, especially because her patience was also running thin, she countered back.

"I know Rachel, and I'm not going to repeat what I told the three of you. But you have to understand, as a parent, there was more than an hour where you weren't accounted for. It's a safety issue. The rules are there for a reason and I know that you have to tell your dads and I where you are at all times. What if something happened to you on your way to Carmel? We wouldn't even know where to find you."

"But you did. The Uber app told you guys," Rachel grumbled.

"You're missing the point, Rachel. It's never okay for us to not know where you are. I know maybe you were used to commuting with your friends in Chicago, but this is Lima and there isn't good public transportation to use. You have to ask us for permission when you go anywhere. Is that clear?"

"Yes ma'am," Rachel said wisely, trying to choose her battles.

"And we have to talk about making good choices, Rach. I know I already talked to you about the spying, but I also know that this escapade wasn't entirely all your idea. I'm just going to take a wild guess and assume that your teammates might've strongly encouraged you?"

Shelby glanced at Rachel through her periphery and noticed her back straighten in confirmation.

"Like any other teenager alive, I realize that you have to deal with peer pressure," Shelby continued. She might as well get it over with now. "I even understand that you may be more likely to succumb to it because you just moved here, you're new, and you want to fit in. I get that, Rachel. But you also have to recognize when you should say no or walk away. And if you're finding it difficult to handle, then come talk to me, or your dads, or Mr. Schue. I know we haven't known each other for very long, but I do know you, Rachel. I know you have the intelligence, the strength, and the self-confidence to help you stand firm, walk away, and resist doing something when you know better. I know you're more than capable of making the right decisions."

Every word that Shelby spoke pierced into Rachel and fueled the intense guilt she was beginning to feel. The neutral and levelheaded way that Shelby was speaking unnerved Rachel more than anything else. Sure, she's gotten lectures from her dads before but it was either a fiery one from Hiram or an emotional one from Leroy. Nobody has ever spoken to her before like she was grown up and not a child. It was also throwing her off how perceptive her mom was being. Shelby just seems to understand her intuitively.

Shelby turned her head to look at her daughter after a few moments of silence passed by. She appeared to be deep in thought and Shelby wanted to make one last point.

"I know you'll probably talk to your dad some more about this later and we still have to discuss your punishment from us, but I just want to say one more thing," Shelby said a little more emphatically. "I don't expect you to be perfect, Rach. Far from it. I don't have unrealistic expectations and I know that you'll probably run into more trouble in the future. But I also know that you're a good kid, a smart kid and that you know how and when to make good choices. I really believe that, so I hope that next time, you'll choose to think twice before getting a little creative with the rules."

Shelby turned to offer her daughter a kind smile, a peace offering, but instantly frowned when she saw Rachel frantically wipe away an unwanted tear. Shelby's heart constricted. She didn't think she was being too hard on her, but this was the second time today she's made her daughter visibly upset.

"What's happening, Rachel?"

"Are we almost there?" She asked desperately.

Shelby made a split second decision. She was done toeing around Rachel. She can sense that something was deeply wrong and that it was more than her getting caught spying.

"What's going on, Rachel? Did I say something wrong? Please talk to me."

Rachel felt herself getting worked up again. Her panic escalated when her mom pulled into the driveway of a beautiful two-story house with a wraparound porch, a landscaped garden, and a large oak tree on the front lawn whose last leaves had turned into a vibrant red color. Rachel took a moment to inspect her mom's house and despite her distress, fell in love immediately.

Shelby cut the engine and placed her hand on Rachel's knee to draw her attention.

"Nothing, I'm okay. I understand what you told me. And I am sorry," she tried to placate her mom.

"I know you're not okay Rachel. I can tell that you're lying to me. But how am I supposed to help if you don't talk to me?" Shelby said accusingly.

Her mom's tone didn't settle well with her. She can't talk to her because she didn't know how to. She was exhausted and frustrated and a million other things. She doesn't even know where to begin if she tried.

"Can we just go inside!" Rachel snapped. She needed space. "Please, Shelby?"

"Fine," Shelby said gripping the steering wheel as she tried to channel patience. "But this conversation isn't over, Rachel. We're going to talk whether you like it or not."

Rachel angrily opened the car door and stalked up the walkway to the front of the house. Shelby ran her hand through her hair in frustration watching her daughter run away from her for the second time that day. She took a deep breath and reminded herself that she needed to be strong, to remain calm, for the both of them.

When she let Rachel in through the door a couple minutes later, her daughter stopped and looked at her questioningly. Shelby nodded in understanding.

"You can go up to your room. It's the second door on the right," Shelby said as she put her purse down and took her jacket off. "I'll come check in on you in a few minutes."

"I—I have my own room here?"

"Of course," Shelby said without thinking about it. She was too preoccupied with what her next move was.

She's had a room for Rachel since the day she moved into this house a little more than a year ago. Not that she knew then that she'd be getting her daughter back in her life, but it was extremely important to her to save that space for Rachel. She can't explain it. And when she found out that she was actually getting her daughter back, she started using the bits of information she's learned about her to slowly turn it into a hopefully comfortable space for her.

Rachel began to walk up the stairs before her mom can change her mind. When she opened the door to her room, another flood of emotions hit her.

Rachel froze taking it all in. There was an accent wall painted with a tasteful pattern of her favorite shade of purple, a built-in bookshelf that was lined celebrity biographies and her favorite classic romance novels, a record player next to a stack of original Broadway cast recordings ready to be listened to, silly postcards of baby animals pinned to a bulletin board above the desk, and a stuffed gold star that was placed against the pillows on the middle of the bed. This room encapsulated who she was better than the one that she put together at her dad's house.

It was the most tangible form of love that Rachel has ever experienced. And without warning, it tipped her off the edge.

* * *

Downstairs, Shelby wasn't doing any better than her daughter. Her emotions were equally in disarray and she was frantically pacing in the kitchen. She was second guessing herself and didn't know what to do next. She was so afraid of messing this up with her daughter. She looked at the clock and decided that they needed to eat. If nothing else, she can at least feed her kid.

"Rachel?" She called up the stairs. She knows she just sent her up, but she also needed to know what she wanted for dinner.

She shifted her focus to making their meal and started taking out ingredients from the pantry. A few seconds passed and she tried again.

"Rach! Can you come down here, please?" She yelled a little louder. Shelby stopped fidgeting when she didn't get a reply the second time. She placed the pan she was holding back down on the counter and listened for a response.

"Rachel?" She called out again. More silence. Shelby's heart rate picked up. She left the kitchen and briskly walked up the stairs two-at-a-time. When she got upstairs she saw Rachel standing at the doorway of her room, unmoving.

"Rachel, are you okay?" Shelby asked, desperation dripping in her voice.

Her mom's voice and her hand on her shoulder pulled Rachel out of the stupor she was in. She took a feeble step into her room and hesitantly turned around to face Shelby.

One look at her mom and Rachel surrendered. There was no fight left in her. Nothing. She relinquished control.

"Please talk to me, Rachel. Please."

"Everyone had you, mom," Rachel whispered and then looked at Shelby with a fiercely tormented expression. "Everyone had you but me. Thousands of people got Shelby Corcoran in their lives from seeing you on stage or hearing you sing. My dads got this version of you they got to befriend and have all these amazing memories with. Everyone on VA had you to teach them and coach them and mentor them. And even Quinn, mom! Quinn had you. She told me how your dad taught her how to play the piano and how every time you babysat her that you'd always watch musicals together."

"Baby—"

"No! It's not fair, mom. You don't understand! Everyone had you but me. I needed you. When my dads got divorced and I didn't understand why, I needed my mom and you weren't there. And I feel so stupid for being so angry and jealous, but I wanted you. _So badly_. And instead everyone got you first."

Shelby was stunned. She didn't know what to say but only felt her heart shatter into a million pieces at Rachel's revelation. She acted on instinct and wrapped her arms around her daughter. Rachel stiffened at the contact at first but then subconsciously leaned into the hug as her mother pulled her closer to her. Rachel immediately started to cry and every sob that wracked through her body tore Shelby into pieces.

"It's not fair," Rachel repeated, her voice breaking as she gave in and wrapped her arms around her mom's neck.

Shelby was paralyzed. She felt like she was just doused in ice-cold water and was rendered frozen by Rachel's emotional confession. Her kid's fresh, hot tears blistering her skin and seeping into her shirt shook her out of her trance. She acted swiftly and moved them to the bed. She sat down and leaned up against the headboard and motioned for Rachel down to sit next to her. Rachel melted into her side and Shelby put her arm around her shoulder and pulled her as close to her as possible. Rachel turned towards Shelby, wrapped arm around her torso, and cried into her mom's chest.

"I am so sorry, Rachel," Shelby said with her own tears threatening to spill. "I had no idea you felt that way. But you have to know baby, you _have_ to know that I'm here now and that I'm yours."

Rachel looked up at her with excruciatingly sad and tired brown eyes and Shelby's heart clenched once again. She vowed right then and there that she would never purposefully be the cause of her daughter's heartbreak ever again.

"I'm all yours," Shelby promised her daughter. "I know it's difficult for you to understand Rach, but just because we weren't together, doesn't mean that I never once stopped thinking about you or caring about you or loving you. Everything I did Rachel, and everything I will do in the future is _for you_. My career, my life, _everything_ I've accomplished and built was always for you so that when it was time for us to be together that you had a mom that you could be proud of and that I could give you the things that you deserve. You were the reason, my reason for absolutely everything that I did and have. You fueled me, so please don't think that you never had me. I was always yours. My heart _always_ belonged to you."

"Really?" Rachel asked in a defeated voice.

"Yes, really," Shelby assured her as she stroked her daughter's hair. "And you don't know how sorry I am that I haven't been there for you in the past when you needed me Rach, but I promise you right now that I'm here for you now and forever and always. You are the most important thing in my life and you will always come first. Do you understand, my love?"

Rachel only nodded and hugged her mom more tightly in response. She was so emotionally spent that she couldn't even formulate another thought.

Shelby had a million other things she wanted to say to her daughter, things that she needed her to desperately understand, but it would have to wait. This wasn't about Shelby right now and she was more than content just holding her baby in her arms like this for the first time since she was born. Shelby kissed the top of Rachel's head and started doing the one thing she knew how to do best when things got rough.

" _When you're weary, feeling small,  
When tears are in your eyes, I'll dry them all  
I'm on your side, when times get rough  
And friends just can't be found  
Like a bridge over troubled water  
I will lay me down."_

Shelby sang slowly and softly while she gently ran her fingers up and down Rachel's back. By the time she finished singing the last verse, she heard Rachel's breathing start to even out and felt her body go limp in her arms. Shelby looked down at her daughter and pledged to do everything in her power to fix things between them and help take away the hurt she felt. There was a lot ahead of them that they needed to work out. Shelby knew that it won't all be afternoons of them watching Barbra Streisand movies or sharing strawberry ice creams. She knew that it would, more likely, be a long and difficult road with inevitable challenges and setbacks for them as they navigated this new relationship. But Shelby also knew that she was ready. She was more than willing to fight for this new life with her daughter. She was ready for the good, the bad, and everything in between.

She has to overcome her fears and insecurities of being a mother and Rachel has to learn to trust and accept her. But she wasn't worried, because holding Rachel in her arms, she resolved that there's nothing they couldn't do, if they did it together.

* * *

 **A/N:** **I have an idea of where I want to take this story, but I'll happily take suggestions for storylines. I always love hearing what you guys think, so thank you—especially to those who consistently leave a note, you guys rock!**

 **Next chapter is a lot more of Shelby and Rachel actually trying to work things out in the wake of this breakthrough. And maybe the beginning of the Aunt Kim/Rachel adventures.**


	10. Chapter 10

Rachel woke up alone more than an hour later right as the last bit of sunlight turned into darkness. She woke up in a daze unsure of where she was at first and sat up timidly trying to get her bearings. She reached over to turn on the lamp and let her eyes adjust as she looked around the room, _her_ room. She felt nauseous in an instant remembering everything that happened that afternoon. Her uneasiness doubled recalling her emotional breakdown with her mom.

She looked over at the bedside table and noticed a glass of water and a note. She picked it up and read it over.

" _I'll be downstairs whenever you're ready. There's clothes for you in the en suite if you want to change into something more comfortable._

 _Love,_

 _Mom"_

Rachel smiled realizing that her mom had started to sign it as Shelby but then crossed out the S and wrote Mom instead. She loved the acknowledgement. She still can't believe it. Shelby Corcoran was her mom.

She felt some relief knowing that Shelby didn't just write off her feelings on how she felt the about their situation. One of her biggest fears recently has been that she's been overreacting to the whole thing, but Shelby didn't make her feel that way at all. Her mom just accepted what she had to say and immediately reassured her that she would always be there from here on out. That was so important to Rachel because there have been so many instances in her life so far where adults have dismissed her feelings because they thought she was just being "sensitive" or "dramatic."

It didn't take away the bitterness she felt about being denied the chance to get to know her mom her entire life, and she's not sure that anything ever will. But Shelby's promises helped assuage some of her fears. Her mom hasn't really given her any reason not to trust her, so she's going to choose to believe her. For now.

She grabbed her phone and looked over the notifications. There were two missed calls from Quinn and several text messages from her, Mercedes, and even Kurt. They were all worried about her safety after Operation Spy on VA imploded. She replied quickly to give her friends proof of life before deciding to get out of bed.

She changed into the sweats her mom laid out for her and stopped and examined her room one more time before heading downstairs. She really did appreciate it and savored in the fact that her mom had set aside this space in her home specifically for her. Her heart sank remembering how poorly she's been treating her mom recently. She decided in that moment that she'd at least try to work through some of her issues with Shelby. They both deserved Rachel putting her best foot forward.

She made her way downstairs at a leisurely pace and wanted to explore her mom's house but thought against it. She didn't want it to seem like she was snooping. From what she can see, Shelby's house had a sleek, contemporary interior design but not so much where it lacked charm. It was warm and inviting and Rachel can tell that her mom worked really hard and put careful thought into making this place a home.

She walked into the living room quietly and found Shelby sitting on the couch with her back turned towards her. She had the flat screen above the fireplace turned down while she typed away on her laptop. Rachel smiled looking over at her mom who had also changed into a pair of yoga pants and an oversized t-shirt. From the reflection on the window, Rachel can tell that she had her makeup off and pulled her usually styled hair into a messy bun. Shelby's current look was a far cry from the elegant red carpet gowns Rachel was used to seeing her in in the pictures that circulated the internet or the chic business looks she wore while on Vocal Adrenaline duty. This was a Shelby Corcoran that most of the world has never seen. It was a version of Shelby that was reserved only for her closest family and friends, and now Rachel. It felt intimate and special and all that Rachel's ever wanted is a part of her mom that was only for her.

"Are you going to stand there all night, Rach?"

Rachel jumped slightly at Shelby's greeting.

"What—how did you know I was standing here?" Rachel questioned as she moved to sit down next to her mom on the sectional.

"Mother's intuition?" Shelby said and smirked at her daughter. _Dad would be so proud._

"I'll remember that the next time I try sneaking around," Rachel joked under her breath but fidgeted nervously as she turned her attention to the television. "Friends?"

Shelby closed her laptop and set it aside. She turned to give her daughter her undivided attention.

"Yup," Shelby said as she grabbed the remote to turn up the volume a bit. "It's kind of my favorite. I've rewatched the series so many times that I like to put it on in the background while I do work or watch it before I sleep. I don't know how to explain it, but it's kind of comforting?"

"Daddy said that they named me Rachel because they were big 'Friends' fans.. but now I kind of feel like it was your idea?" Rachel pondered.

Shelby let out a small laugh and got a faraway look in her eyes as if she was recalling the memory.

"While I was pregnant with you, I had a rough third trimester and was put on bed rest. It drove me crazy because I just have a lot of natural energy and like to be active. I was so bored, but your dad Leroy and I would watch 'Friends' all the time. It helped kill the time and we loved it. Hiram wasn't a fan, but his mom's name was Rachel, so it just kind of worked out for everyone. And Barbra was well—you know. No explanation needed."

"I like it," Rachel said honestly. She loved hearing a part of her history that she didn't know about before.

"Me too, Rach," Shelby said as she comfortingly patted her daughter's knee.

A few moments of silence passed and they both turned their focus to the show in front of them. Rachel knows that it's all in her head but she couldn't help but feel awkward. There was so much that happened between them this afternoon and it felt like the elephant in the room was sitting right smack in between them on the couch. She waited for Shelby to make the first move but after a few more minutes passed, she chanced a look at her mom who seemed intensely preoccupied with her thoughts. Remembering that she was going to try to do better, she jumped off the ledge first.

"Mom?"

"Yeah, baby?" Shelby turned to face her daughter. Her heart swelled at the label. She didn't allow herself to relish in it earlier in fear of it being a fluke on her daughter's end, but now that Rachel said it again unprompted, it melted Shelby's God damn heart. It's a title she's been waiting to hear for almost 14 years now, and it was undeniably worth the wait.

"Are you okay?" Rachel asked nervously. Shelby seemed to be somewhere else right now.

"You know—you've been calling me mom."

"Oh," Rachel contemplated. "I guess I hadn't realized. It feels so natural to say it. Is that okay?"

"More than okay, baby," Shelby said without skipping a beat and gave Rachel a grateful smile. "Definitely more than okay."

Rachel tucked her hair behind her ear out of nervousness, as if to just give her hands something to do. Her mom didn't answer her question if she was okay and Rachel was unsure of where to go next. Shelby noticed Rachel's fidgeting and realized that she's been in somewhat of a trance.

To be honest, she was drained and she was still reeling from Rachel's heartbreaking confession earlier. She felt crippled by fear and anxiety about what to do next and how they can move forward from here. Hearing her daughter so broken and sad over how she felt cheated out of not having Shelby in her life has made her rethink all of the decisions that she's made. Shelby felt gutted. She doesn't even know where to begin to make it up to Rachel. She doesn't want to fail her daughter any more than she feels like she already has.

Shelby shook away her thoughts. She can figure it out later. She needed to be here and present with her kid. She strategized quickly and decided to go with the two things she knew without a shred of doubt right now.

"I love you, Rachel. And I'm sorry."

Rachel turned to her mom in shock. That's not what she was expecting. She met Shelby's eyes that were filled with such a fierce love and complete sincerity in them. She'd never tire of her mom looking at her like that. Rachel leaned into her, craving her mother's comfort. Shelby gladly obliged and wrapped her arm around her daughter and pulled her close. She loved how physically affectionate Rachel seemed to be.

"It's okay mom," Rachel said as she snuggled closer and rested her head against Shelby's shoulder. "And I'm sorry too."

"No baby, it's not okay," Shelby said sadly. "But thank you for telling me how you feel. And I hope you continue to do so, Rach. I know this must be difficult for you and I'm not going to pretend like I know how you feel, but I just want to help. And like I promised you earlier, I'm here for you now—whatever you need, no matter what."

Shelby left it at that for now. She knew that there was more that they needed to discuss but she didn't want to push it at the moment. They've both had an emotionally grueling day. Rachel must've felt the same way because all she did was nod and threw her arm around Shelby's torso for a hug.

"Thanks, mom."

"Of course, my love," Shelby said as she placed a kiss on top of her daughter's head.

They stayed embraced for a few minutes, reveling in the feeling of being in each other's arms. As much as Shelby didn't want the peace to end, she knew she still had to talk to Rachel about her punishment for sneaking around before they can put the day behind them.

She talked to Hiram and Leroy briefly on the phone earlier to hash out consequences and they decided to let Shelby dole out Rachel's punishment. _Lovely_. Shelby's going from the mother who abandoned her child in Rachel's eyes to the mother who didn't waste a single second to discipline her right after she poured her heart out to her. She wallowed in self-pity for a few moments but then toughened up knowing that she wasn't doing Rachel or herself any favors if she shied away from her parental duties now. It was necessary to set the boundaries right away so that Rachel knew what to expect moving forward. _Don't forget, you're the one in charge,_ Leroy reminded her on the phone earlier.

Shelby was about to go right into it before Rachel interrupted her.

"Mom? Can I tell you something?" Rachel asked in a small voice. She pulled away from Shelby's arms and sat up anxiously. She didn't think she deserved comfort after what she was about to say.

"Sure, Rach. Always," Shelby said confused, unsure of where this was leading. She mirrored her daughter's movements and straightened her back and neck.

"Remember when I told you I was sick on Saturday? That's why I couldn't go to the movies with you? I—um—I lied. And I'm really, _really_ sorry, mom. Daddy left for Chicago and it made me upset and it's just hard. I don't know. I just got so overwhelmed and I didn't know how to tell you. I know I shouldn't have lied. I swear mom, I did want to spend time with you, but I just felt like I was kind of drowning. I'm sorry. I should've just been honest. Are you mad at me?" Rachel blurted out in one big breath.

She averted her mom's gaze and played with the hem of her shirt to distract herself from Shelby's reaction. She knew she had to come clean. She's felt so guilty over this for two days now and she didn't want her mom to be angry with her. Rachel felt like she was messing everything up between them.

Shelby was a bit blindsided. She didn't expect Rachel to admit to that at all since she was prepared to just look over it. The apology should've helped her feel better, but it only increased her worry about her daughter tenfold.

 _Drowning?_ Shelby can tell that Rachel was struggling. That much was obvious. But now she was only beginning the see the scope of just how much. The sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach grew realizing that Rachel's internal conflict iwas more complex than she can grasp. Not that she was blaming them, but it's clear that it was less casual than Hiram and Leroy had let on. Or perhaps they weren't aware of it either. She made a mental note to discuss it more with her fathers later.

"I know. Kim—my little sister, your aunt—saw you at the Lima Bean with Quinn on Saturday," she said distractedly. Her mind whirling, she didn't realize that Rachel didn't respond. Shelby mentally berated herself after one glance at her kid who had a painfully regretful expression written all over her face.

She quickly began damage control and put her arm back around Rachel. She hooked her finger under her daughter's chin and tilted her head up so she can see her face.

"Baby, look at me," Shelby said gently. "I promise, I'm not mad. I—I understand that you're dealing with a lot right now. I get it. I mean, who has the frame of reference to use when your two dads get divorced and your surrogate mom comes back into your life, huh? It's a lot kiddo, and like I told you before, I don't expect you to handle this gracefully. I just want us to start being honest with one another. I think that's the only way we'll get through this is if we start to _really_ talk to each other. And I think you coming clean about this was a good start, so thank you for telling me the truth. I appreciate it, Rach."

Rachel nodded feeling grateful for her mom's empathy. She let out a sigh of relief, curled up closer to Shelby, and let her embrace wash away the guilt she felt.

"I really am sorry mom," she said sincerely. "I swear on Barbra that I won't ever lie to you ever again."

"Well, we'll see about that," Shelby chuckled. "I appreciate it though, Rach. And I'm glad we're talking about this now because—we still have to talk about your trek to Carmel this afternoon, kiddo."

Rachel stiffened in her mom's arms and recoiled away from Shelby.

"What? But _moooom_ , we already talked about it," Rachel complained.

Shelby couldn't help but smile. Even the sound of Rachel whining "mom" was pure magic to her.

"I know and I promise I'm not going to repeat myself, but we still have to discuss your punishment."

Rachel sighed. "Isn't getting caught punishment enough?"

"Um—no," Shelby said amused by her daughter's logic. "You broke the rules kiddo—multiple ones, I might add—and there have to be consequences. You know better than to lie, sneak around, and go anywhere without permission."

"I do, and that's why I _promise_ I won't do it again," Rachel said convincingly. She dug deep in her arsenal of proven methods that have gotten her out of punishments in the past. She decided to go with her trusty weapon of her big, pleading doe eyes. Her dads have been putty in her hands every time she's wielded it.

"Please mama, I _swear_ I won't do it again."

 _Oh no, absolutely not,_ Shelby thought. The big eyes she expected but the _mama_ sneak attack? _Low blow, Rachel Barbra Berry. Low. Blow._

Rachel cuddled back into her mom and sniffled pitifully for good measure. Shelby melted at Rachel's touch and found her body subconsciously responding. She was absentmindedly rubbing her daughter's arm in comfort when she realized what was happening. _Curse her maternal instincts!_ She pulled away and stood up abruptly. Rachel flinched in shock, startled by Shelby's sudden movements.

Shelby looked at Rachel's stunned and confused face and at herself who was now standing awkwardly directly over. She laughed heartily at their positions and Rachel thought her mom was losing it.

"What—Mom?"

"Rach, stop," Shelby continued to laugh. "I know what you're doing, young lady. And it's not going to work on me."

Rachel gave her a sly grin in response and tried one more Hail Mary pass.

"What are you talking about, mom? I'm not doing anything at all," Rachel pouted. She jetted her lower lip out and batted her long eyelashes slowly. Shelby felt her knees buckle slightly. _How did she end up creating the most adorable kid on the face of the Earth?_

Shelby met Rachel's eye contact and almost conceded right then and there. With that look, there isn't anything she wouldn't do to give her daughter the world if she asked for it.

Shelby tried to reign in her emotions and focus on the task at hand. She was in charge. She couldn't let Rachel manipulate her into backing down from her responsibilities now. Rachel asked her to be her mom and that includes teaching her right from wrong.

"Alright Rachel, I'm not playing around anymore," Shelby said a little more sternly. She stepped back a couple feet from the couch to put some distance between her and her insanely lovable and cuddly child. She didn't trust herself enough to be anywhere near Rachel's captivating warmth.

Rachel's face fell in defeat and she sank back down on the couch. _Hm..her mom is a lot more powerful than she realized._

"I don't want to sound like a broken record, Rachel. I don't speak just to hear myself talk, so I really need you to listen to me here. Your actions this afternoon show me and your dads that you think you can do whatever you want, whenever you want, and that's not acceptable. You're not even 14 years old yet, Rachel Barbra. You are a child. And it is absolutely not okay for you to do as you please, let alone travel to another town— _without permission—_ to sneak into private property. Not okay. Do you understand?"

Rachel shrunk into herself feeling conscience-stricken all over again. When her mom laid it out like that, it seemed a lot worse than Rachel had realized. When she agreed to spy, she never thought of all the rules she would be actively breaking. Or all the people that she'd worry with her actions. She didn't think. At all, really. She only nodded timidly in response.

"I'm going to need verbal confirmation Rach," Shelby said seriously.

"Yes mom, I do understand now," Rachel confirmed.

"Good. Thank you baby," Shelby softened, thrilled that Rachel was still employing her new label even in the midst of being disciplined. "So, your dads and I have talked and we decided on a few consequences."

" _Few?"_ Rachel exclaimed. She can understand one but she didn't think her transgressions were in need of more than one disciplinary action. That would be an _injustice_! "Mom I—"

"Just listen to me first, Rach," Shelby interjected. "I think you'll see that our consequences are fair given the situation."

Shelby paused a moment to let Rachel compose herself. Once she felt like she had her daughter's attention again, she continued, wanting to get this over with.

"Like I said, I talked to your fathers, and we decided that you're going to be grounded for the rest of this week, including this weekend. And since you've clearly abused your Uber privileges, you'll also be losing your phone privileges for the next two weeks, except for when you'll get it back during the school day. And finally, because you haven't demonstrated any regard to the rules, I'll need you to read this during the week and write up a one-page report for me summarizing what you learned."

Shelby picked up a book next to her laptop and tossed it over to her daughter. Rachel clumsily caught what her mom threw at her and glanced at the title quickly. _The National High School Show Choir Competition Rulebook._

"Mom! I don't think that's fair," Rachel instantly scowled. "I think you're mixing up Coach Corcoran and mom punishments. You can't hand out consequences from both!"

"No, no, I hear you Rach and I agree and I will do my best to separate the two in the future," Shelby countered back. "But just humor me this time. I actually think this may be of genuine interest to you. And you are the New Directions' team captain right? As a leader, it's never a bad idea to get yourself acquainted with the rules and regulations. I think you'll find my notes in the margins very helpful."

Shelby stared at her daughter intently. She is aware that she may be toeing the line and mixing up her roles a bit, but she sincerely thinks that this will be an insightful activity for Rachel to do. It'll allow her daughter to familiarize herself with the rules and ingrain them in her head. She figures the more understanding that Rachel has of the show choir competition bylaws—and the _penalties_ —the less likely she is to break them. And yes, Shelby was trying to teach her kid lesson by appealing to her competitive nature.

"Okay.." Rachel carefully considered. Her mom had a valid point. It wouldn't hurt to be knowledgeable of what is or isn't allowed in order to help the New Directions. She doubted that Mr. Schue was all that familiar with the show choir regulations and there's no way that any of her other teammates even know that the rulebook even exists. "Fine, but why do I have to write a report? Can't I just read it?"

"So I can ensure that you were able to comprehend what you read," Shelby stated, feeling triumphant with her first big Mom Win. "It'll be nothing, Rach. It won't take you longer than two hours to read the rulebook and then we can even work on the summary together while you're over here this weekend."

"I'm staying here this weekend?" Rachel's head shot up questioningly. Shelby froze. She was waiting to bring this up at a later time. She wasn't prepared to have this discussion now. All things considered, Rachel spending the night would be a _big_ move for them and she wasn't sure if Rachel was ready for it yet or even wanted it.

"Um—yes," Shelby paced nervously in front of her daughter. "If you want to, of course. I talked to your dad earlier and he's expecting to be busy with work this weekend and said that he'll be in and out of the office working late. We were thinking that you can come over Saturday morning, spend the day with me, and stay the night? Or your dad also mentioned that you can go over to your Uncle Jeremy's? Whatever you want, Rach."

Rachel took a brief moment to weigh her options. On one hand, although she's starting to feel more and more comfortable with Shelby, it does still feel like they're standing on shaky ground and an entire weekend seems like a dangerously long time to spend together when she still felt so unsteady about their situation. On the other hand, as much as she loved her dad's older brother and his wife, they had three teenage boys who were all older than her and constantly teased her for being a theatre geek.

"Can I stay with you?" Rachel asked decisively, not trying to overthink it. She promised herself that she'd put in the effort. It took her breakdown earlier and her mom's help to make her realize that things won't get better unless she tried. She needed to meet Shelby halfway.

"Of course, baby. I'd love it if you did," Shelby's face lit up. She didn't expect Rachel to agree so readily. Rachel knew she made the right decision seeing her mom give her a genuine smile in response. It'd be worth it to make her happy.

"Me too," she said honestly.

Unsure of what came over her but tired of being apart, Rachel got up off the couch, walked over to Shelby, stood up on her tip-toes, and locked her arms around her mom's neck. Shelby initially froze in shock at the unexpected hug but swiftly recovered and embraced her daughter back fiercely. She's convinced. _Nothing_ would ever feel as good as holding her baby in her arms.

Rachel slowly breathed in the faint scent of her mom's perfume trying to ingrain it into her memory. She didn't realize she had tightened her grip on Shelby, but she _needed_ this right now. After today, after everything.

Seeming to have picked up on Rachel's silent plea, Shelby didn't dare let go. She only pulled her daughter closer to her, as if she was trying to mold their bodies into one. When Rachel reluctantly pulled away a few seconds later, Shelby looked over her daughter affectionately.

"Rach?"

"Yeah?"

"You know you're still grounded, right?"

" _Moooom_!"

* * *

A few hours later, Shelby was rushing through what was usually her rather elaborate nighttime ritual. Exhausted would be a serious understatement for how she currently felt. Rachel left a little more than an hour ago and all of Shelby's strength went out the door with her.

Fortunately, the rest of their evening together went smoothly. After they discussed Rachel's punishment, Shelby quickly went over her ground rules and Rachel complied without complaint. During dinner, though, Shelby noticed a shift in Rachel's demeanor, who seemed to have grown a tad more subdued for her liking. But Shelby let it go, attributing her daughter's change of mood to just the entire day catching up to her.

Shelby understood. She was also spent. Every single fiber of her being felt like it was consumed today. Her mind and her heart felt exceptionally weary. But it was worth it. For Rachel, it would always be worth it.

She had just finished her moisturizing routine when her phone began to ring. She briskly walked out of her bathroom and over to the bedside table where she left her phone charging. She furrowed her brow seeing the Berry's landline on the screen. She didn't waste a second picking it up.

"Hi, Hiram."

"No mom, it's me. Dad took my phone away already but he just let me call you for a second."

"Oh, hey Rach. What's going on?" Shelby asked with concern, puzzled why her daughter was calling so late.

"Sorry," Rachel replied quietly on the other line. "Were you sleeping already? Did I wake you up?"

"No baby, it's okay," Shelby assured her. "I just finished getting ready for bed. I'm just surprised you called. Is everything okay?"

"Yeah," Rachel paused. "It's just—I don't know. I know I just saw you, but it feels weird now if we don't say goodnight on the phone before I go to sleep."

Shelby's heart exploded.

"I will make sure to call you every night then, baby. Thanks for reminding me. And as much as I'd love to keep talking, it's past your bedtime and we need to get some rest, so good night Rachel—"

"Wait! Mom?"

"Yeah?"

Rachel paused for a few moments and Shelby can practically hear her mind whirring through the phone.

"I _am_ proud of you," Rachel finally said.

"What, baby?"

"Earlier? Earlier, you said that you've done everything in your life so that I could have a mom that I would be proud of and I just—I want you to know what I am proud of you."

"Rach—"

"And that I—I still don't really understand why we were kept apart but I don't blame you or dad and daddy. Or I'll try my best not to, mom. I know that you all thought you were doing what was best for me, and I will try my hardest to remember that."

"Thank you, Rachel. I don't—that's more than what I deserve. I love you, baby. I love you so much."

"I love you too, mom."

"Yeah?"

"Yes. I love you, more."

"Not possible Rachel Barbra, not possible at all."

* * *

 **A/N:** **Hey friends! Thanks for all of the insanely positive reviews from the last update. I appreciate you guys and everyone who's following along.**

 **This chapter sort of got away from me but I didn't want to rush it because I really wanted to make sure that Shelby and Rachel addressed everything that's happened before they can move forward. SO, next chapter is a lot more of that good, good Shel/Rach moments (their first weekend together) and some Aunt Kim in the mix. See you then!**


	11. Chapter 11

It's been a little more than a week since Rachel got caught spying at Carmel. Since then, things have gotten significantly better between the pair. It wasn't a walk in the park. Far from it. But they had hit a comfortable stride of actively trying to work things out this time around. Leave it to her daughter's penchant for trouble to bring them together.

Rachel's first weekend with her had come and gone. And as Shelby expected, didn't go without a hitch. That would've been too easy.

* * *

Since Rachel was still serving out her grounding, Shelby thought it was apt to put her young charge to work. Taking advantage of the warmer weather, they spent most of the day prepping Shelby's yard and garden for the winter. She got a kick out of teaching and watching Rachel how to do yard work. She was the epitome of a fish out of water. Rachel and her dads lived in a condo in the city and Hiram hired someone to maintain his yard in Lima, so Shelby had the incredible privilege and responsibility to teach her daughter how to do manual labor. Hiram was right. There was so much that apparently only she can teach Rachel. And it was _awesome_.

It took them almost twice as long as Shelby had intended but it was well worth it watching her daughter wrestle with the lawn mower that seemed to be twice her size and just as temperamental as she was. _Priceless._ They also had another setback when Rachel, unamused with the delight her mother found in her struggles, "accidentally" pushed Shelby into the pile of leaves she had just prodigiously worked to compile. If any of Shelby's neighbors had looked out at the right moment, all they'd be able to see is a mess of limbs and leaves flying in the air as the two playfully tumbled on the ground. Shelby experienced a new form of happiness while she ran around the yard trying to catch her ballsy kid. Rachel's pure glee and peals of laughter were a welcome change from the demure behavior her daughter still often employed around her. When Shelby finally caught the troublemaker, she gathered her up in her arms and hung on tight, trying to savor in all the joy she currently felt. Rachel's rosy cheeks, bright smile, and loud giggle in that moment would always hold a special place in Shelby's heart.

After their grounds keeping adventure, Shelby had Rachel focus on her report on the rulebook. To prepare the new mom for the weekend, Hiram and Leroy both gave her the rundown and made it a point to inform her that their daughter did not do well with idle hands. Heeding their advice, Shelby set Rachel up in her study, a space that the girl was growing increasingly fond of.

Rachel had come over for dinner a couple days after their talk and discovered her mother's study. A few months ago, Shelby converted her spacious sunroom into an inviting office. The large windows offered panoramic views of the tree line of the woods at the edge of the backyard. It was a comfortable workspace that was filled with light and warmth. But what drew Rachel to it was the piano in the corner and the hundreds of sheet music, books, recordings, and CDs that were all tastefully placed on the shelves. And in that same room were some of Shelby's notable accolades that were rightfully displayed: the Jimmy Award she won in high school, an Obie and Drama Desk Award for her off-Broadway roles, a photo of her with Vocal Adrenaline after they won their first national championship, and the showpiece of them all—the Tony. Her mother's single greatest crowning achievement. The award to end all awards. Rachel was in complete awe and had no idea that her mom timed how long Rachel stared at it before she finally interrupted her. Seven minutes and 40 seconds. Rachel was shook to her core seeing the the prized jewel of the theatre world in person. Ultimately, Shelby had to physically pry Rachel away from her study when the girl's father picked her up at the end of the night.

So, when Shelby assigned her daughter to complete the rulebook report, she compromised and allowed Rachel to work in the study. She wanted to at least make her jailbird for the weekend feel comfortable. They spent a couple hours engaged in their respective work. Rachel was sitting at her desk—quite adorably in Shelby's opinion, since her daughter would often knit her eyebrows and bite her bottom lip in concentration while she diligently read and wrote. And Shelby was camped out on the armchair in the corner grading papers for her AP English class while occasionally answering questions Rachel threw her way. It was one the most relaxed and productive Shelby had ever been. She loved sharing her space with her daughter.

After carefully going over Rachel's write-up together and being thoroughly impressed with the actual effort her daughter put in, Shelby decided that she had earned her keep. They spent the rest of the evening making homemade pizzas from scratch. If Shelby thought that Rachel was a fish out of water doing yard work, then Rachel was equally a square peg in a round hole cooking in the kitchen. Her daughter's domestic skills, or more accurately, lack thereof, was just truly incomparable _._ However, with some patience, a lot of coaching, and a brief food fight, they had—to order pizza instead.

When they finished devouring their pizza—which they both thought was delicious because takeout never fails—Shelby had her daughter begin to wind down for the night.

Shelby should've seen it coming. But she didn't.

Maybe it was all the commotion from dinner that distracted her. Or maybe she was just too preoccupied with the anxiousness of having Rachel in her care for the night. Either way, when she woke up a couple hours after she had tucked Rachel in and didn't find her child in her bed when she checked on her, Shelby knew that something was inherently wrong.

She found Rachel curled up in the armchair in her study, glass of water in hand. Seeing her daughter's distressed expression instantly broke Shelby's heart. It was as if her kid had the weight of the world on her shoulders. And then some.

After a significant amount of coaxing, Rachel dejectedly confessed that she couldn't get comfortable or fall asleep and wanted to go back home—to her room and to her bed. Shelby felt like the wind just got knocked out of her at Rachel's admission. But pushing her devastation aside, she made a prompt decision to bring her back home. She and Hiram decided earlier on that if Rachel felt uncomfortable at any point, then they would hit pause and do whatever Rachel wanted, and Shelby wasn't going to deny her daughter that.

Their trip back to the Berry house in the middle of the night was a quiet affair. Shelby's mind was whirling, retracing every step of the day trying to figure out where it went wrong, where _she_ went wrong. And Rachel was preoccupied with her growing feelings of intense guilt. It wasn't Shelby. It was the newness and the unfamiliarity of it all that frightened her. And despite Shelby's assurances that it was all okay, she knew that she had hurt her mom's feelings.

After Hiram had tucked in his despondent daughter, he made his way downstairs to talk to her equally melancholy mom.

"I'm sorry, Hiram," Shelby said sadly as she got up from the couch. "I just keep going over it in my head and I don't know where or when she started to feel uncomfortable. I thought we were having such a good time, and when I put her to bed she was okay, but I should've paid closer attention. I should've—"

Hiram reacted quickly and pulled an increasingly distraught Shelby into a hug. He felt her body tense but then relax, as if her last bit of strength just left her body.

"Shelbs, stop," he chided gently while rubbing her back in comfort. "I just talked to Rachel and she said she had a fun time with you today. She loves you. I just don't think she's ready for the sleepovers yet. Maybe we overestimated it, but you did the right thing. Rach said that you didn't make her feel bad at all. You were a _good_ mom tonight. You put her first."

 _But she didn't feel like it._ Shelby felt tears begin to swell in her eyes but she blinked them away in frustration. She only nodded warily in response. Hiram put his hands on either side of her shoulders and pulled away so he can make eye contact.

"You did the right thing bringing her back here and Rachel will remember that," he said seriously. "She's invested in this, she just needs more time to adjust. And I know this because she's asking for you. She wants to say goodnight to her mom before she goes to sleep."

Shelby acquiesced and made her way to her daughter's room, still a nervous wreck. She knocked on the door timidly and Rachel immediately turned around to look at her mom, tears streaming down her crumpled face. Shelby crawled into bed and had her poor baby in her arms in an instant.

"I'm so sorry mom," Rachel said crying softly. "I know I'm being a baby. I love you. I love your house. I just—I don't know."

"Shh, it's okay, my love. It's okay," Shelby soothed. "You are not a baby. I understand Rachel, and it's okay."

"But you're mad at me and I'm sorry. I should've just stayed."

"Rachel, listen to me," Shelby said with a stern voice while she wiped away her daughter's tears. "I promise you, I am not mad. I will never be mad about this. Not even a little bit. Baby, I'm glad you told me how you felt. I don't want you to ever feel uncomfortable. I will never force you to do anything you don't want to do and I will never push you to do something that you're not ready for. I promise you that, Rach. Okay? So no more crying, it'll be okay, we'll figure this out."

Rachel didn't how to respond so she just curled up closer to her mom. Shelby understood and held on to Rachel tightly, trying her best to provide her daughter with as much comfort as she can. After Rachel had started to calm down, Shelby looked at the clock and sighed. It was beyond late. Her kid needed rest.

"Rach?" Shelby called her attention as she kissed the top of her head. "Baby, you have to sleep, so I think it's time for me to—"

"No! Mom please, can you just stay? Can you stay and sleep with me? _Please_ mom _?_ Please don't go."

"Okay, Rach, okay," Shelby complied, incredibly confused about the panicked begging. "I won't go anywhere, but we need to get some rest. Okay, baby? Let's get some sleep. I know you must be exhausted from all those super hard chores we worked on earlier."

Rachel let out a small laugh and Shelby breathed a sigh of relief. Rachel shifted down the bed and turned sideways so that she was face to face with her mom.

"I'm really sorry mama," Rachel whispered.

Shelby felt her heart clench at the pain in her daughter's voice. She gently brushed Rachel's hair out of her face and gave her a small smile.

"Nothing to be sorry for, baby. Just get some sleep. I love you, I'll be right here."

Ten minutes later, Hiram walked into the room to check on the mother and daughter only to find the pair wrapped up in each other's arms and peacefully at sleep.

The next morning, Rachel woke up and she was back to normal as if the entire night hadn't happened. Not buying into their daughter's facade, Shelby and Hiram decided to choose their battles and let it go for now.

Taking advantage of Rachel's agreeable mood, Shelby suggested that they grab some breakfast with her sister—who had been calling every day, multiple times a day to ask Shelby when she can finally meet her niece. Surprising everyone, Rachel eagerly obliged. And not surprising to Shelby, the two had hit it off immediately. Rachel had welcomed her "cool Aunt Kim" with open arms. And cool Aunt Kim was a role that her younger sister—with her easygoing and loving personality—was born to play.

* * *

But now it's been a few days since their weekend together and it was becoming increasingly evident that Shelby had a problem. A Broadway problem. That is, her daughter just realized that she's _famous_ problem.

It had started off innocently at first with the standard questions about all-things theater and all-things Broadway. It was often their go-to topic to discuss. It was safe territory for them. And Shelby does genuinely love Rachel's passion for the art and music. She was thrilled that they had that to share. But, at the same time, her kid wasn't even trying to be discreet about the reverence she held about Shelby's career and the fame she had achieved. It truly awed the Broadway-dreamer.

When Rachel asked Shelby if she can borrow her phone to take pictures of the Tony from different angles and in different lighting environments, Shelby knew it was time to call in reinforcement. She was already having a tough time trying to be Rachel's mom. She didn't want to have to compete with Shelby Corcoran, Broadway star, either.

So, Shelby called in the one person in the world who never failed to bring her back down to Earth no matter how many awards she won or autographs she signed. It doesn't matter how successful or famous Shelby got, Kim would always see her older sister as just the theater nerd and music geek that she's always been. Nobody grounded Shelby Corcoran like her little sister.

"Okay Rach, so your dad won't be by to pick you up until around nine and I'm a little behind on prep work for VA's Holiday Showcase, so Aunt Kim is going to come over to spend some time with you while I work in my study for a bit, and then we'll all have dinner together, okay?" Shelby rapidly instructed as she put dishes away in the kitchen. "Did you finish your homework already?"

"Yes mother, and okay, but you know I don't need a babysitter," Rachel answered, rolling her eyes from where she was sitting on the island while she watched her mom putter around the kitchen. "You're not going anywhere. I'm not a baby. I can take care of myself."

"Please do not roll your eyes at me, young lady," Shelby warned with her back still turned to her daughter. Rachel swallowed nervously at her mother's omnipotent power. Shelby turned to face her smart kid and raised an eyebrow. "I never said you were a baby. I know you can take care of yourself, kiddo, but Kim just wanted to come early to spend some time with you. And you like your Aunt Kim, right? Because if you don't Rach, and you're not comfortable, you just need to tell me baby and I'll call her right now—"

"No mom, it's fine," Rachel interjected, not wanting to go down that rabbit hole. "I do really like Aunt Kim. Sorry. I didn't mean for it to come out like that. Yeah, it's fine. She's pretty cool."

" _Just_ pretty cool?!" Kim questioned, startling the pair with her surprise entrance. Rachel shrieked and jumped up in her seat and Shelby glared at her sister for the unnecessary shock.

"You know you could've just called or knocked like a normal person," Shelby admonished as she accepted a quick hug from an amused Kim.

"And then miss that reaction? That's what you get for giving me a key," Kim said, still laughing while she gave Rachel a kiss on the cheek. "Hey, mini-Shel. Sorry for the scare, but I missed you!"

"I saw you two days ago, Aunt Kim. But I missed you too," Rachel said truthfully. Kim sat down next to her niece and put her arm around her, as if to physically remind herself that Rachel was really there. Shelby's heart warmed at the interaction.

"So what's new, Rae?" Kim asked. "How's school going?"

"It's alright. I have a couple tests before Thanksgiving break, so that's unpleasant. But Mr. Schue has us doing Madonna in Glee this week and I'm ecstatic about that. She's a genius."

Shelby shook her head at Will's questionable coaching methods. She appreciated Madge for her musical and cultural significance as much as the next person, but how is singing her songs for fun going to help them prepare for Regionals? _Amateurs._

"She is an icon," Kim agreed. "Shelly, remember when she came to see 'Rent' and you ran into her backstage?"

Rachel's jaw dropped to the floor. And Shelby shot her sister a fiery look of disapproval. Kim's eyes widened realizing what she just said and instantly dropped her gaze to look away from her sister's patented Coach Corcoran glare before she turned into stone.

"Mom, what?!" Rachel exclaimed. "You met _Madonna?"_

"Not really Rach," Shelby sighed. "She just came to the show one night and I ran into her backstage. She wasn't even there to see me. I was just in the chorus then."

"But _still,_ mom. That's so cool. You met Madonna. You were on Broadway. Ugh, you're just so extraordinary," Rachel said completely impressed and completely missing the point.

"Thanks baby," Shelby chuckled. _And absolutely thanks for nothing, Kim._ "But it's not a big deal. Yes, it was amazing, but it was like any other job."

"Not really," Rachel argued. "You were on stage every night performing for hundreds. That's not like any other job. You weren't just like a teacher or a nurse or something like that. No offense, Aunt Kim."

"Oh none taken Rae," Kim shrugged. She only had a regular job of being the Head Nurse of the Oncology Department at the Lima County Hospital. Now she understands what her sister meant by Rachel's slightly blind admiration. _Oops._

"But I think fame and stardom is all relative," Kim attempted to walk her niece back. "Yes, your mom's a Broadway actress, but she's also a normal person, who just happens to be extremely talented and was able to use that talent and hard work to find success."

"I get that," Rachel replied. "But Aunt Kim, have you seen mom's Tony? She's kind of a legend. And she didn't just do _any_ musical. She did _the_ musical. 'Wicked' is like the gateway drug of musical theatre. Mom, I honestly think you're single-handedly responsible for getting an entire generation into live theatre."

Shelby internally groaned. She's going to kill Kim.

"I don't think so Rachel," Shelby said modestly. "Regardless, none of that changes who I am. And at the end of the day, I'm just a regular person despite achieving any of that."

Rachel was trying to follow their logic, but they were both crazy. Shelby was a mega-talented Broadway superstar whether she believed she was one or not.

"But mom, you're not understanding. You are Shelby Corcoran. Critics literally group you with Broadway divas like Audra McDonald, Bernadette Peters, and even Patti LuPone. You're _that_ good. Also, unrelated, but mom, did you know that there's a Facebook fan page dedicated to your cheekbones? It's called 'Shelby Corcoran's Cheekbones' and it's got pictures of your face and currently has 12.7 _thousand_ likes."

"No forkin' way!" Kim said incredulously as she pulled out her phone to give it a like. And perhaps invite her husband Brian to like it too while she's at it. "That is insane! Rae, how much money do you think I can get if I sell them never-before-seen selfies of your mom?"

"I'm not entirely sure, but I do think that mom should make an Instagram. Dad and daddy won't let me have one. But you should let me manage yours, mom. We can make amazing Insta-stories. I guarantee you that you'll get thousands of followers."

"And on that note, I am leaving," Shelby said in surrender as she walked away without looking back, silently promising herself to _never_ ask Kim for help ever again _._ "I will be back later. Please do not burn down my house!"

"So do you think that's a no?" Rachel asked sadly, her voice dripping with rejection as she turned to face her aunt.

"I believe so," Kim said in consolation. "But follow me kid, I think I may have something that will help cheer you up."

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Rachel and Kim were on the living room floor sitting on top of blankets and pillows in front of the fireplace roasting marshmallows.

"This is kind of fun," Rachel said in amusement while she carefully watched her marshmallow roasting over the warm open fire.

"Isn't it?" Kim smiled at her niece. "Living room s'mores is the Corcoran women's version of camping."

"Anything that involves chocolate, I'm here for it."

"You're telling me, kid," Kim agreed as she inspected her perfectly roasted marshmallow. "Actually, this is your mom's tradition. When I did my nursing internship at Columbia, I lived with her one summer. We were both so busy and rarely spent time together but one week we decided to stop and have a quick 'dinner' together but all we had were marshmallows, oreos, and half a bar of chocolate, so Shelly fired up the stove in the kitchen and we had s'mores. And then we ended up doing it once a week, every week for the three months I was there."

"I didn't know you lived in New York with mom," Rachel said laughing at the story. "That's so cool. Why didn't you guys just go to dinner?"

"We didn't have time. We were on opposite schedules. I had the day shift and then Shelly just came back from tour then, so I think she was auditioning and also preparing for a cabaret show. There was just a lot going on."

"That must've been right before she did 'Wicked' then?" Rachel contemplated, doing the math in her head.

"Yeah I think so," Kim confirmed. "I do remember her singing what sounded like The Wizard and I."

"That is _awesome_ ," Rachel replied. "You were probably one of the first people in the world to hear 'Wicked' songs. I'd _kill_ to be one the first to hear original Broadway songs."

"Well, I definitely felt like I wanted to _kill_ your mom after hearing her sing things over and over and _over_ again in her small studio with nowhere to escape."

Rachel giggled and shook her head in disagreement while she grabbed the other ingredients to craft her s'more.

"Still. I think that's amazing. I wish I knew mom then," Rachel said without thinking about it.

Kim felt her heart constrict at the loaded statement. She found herself scooting closer to Rachel and softly leaned against her small frame while they both continued to watch the fire blaze in front of them.

"Rae?"

"Hmm?" Rachel leaned back against her aunt gently. Her Aunt Kim was so nice and made her feel so comfortable.

"You know, I think I'm probably the most proud of Shelly. Maybe more than anyone else and that's including your grandma and grandpa. I mean, don't you _dare_ tell her, but she completely awes me too. She's my big sister, so of course I think she's the coolest person in the world. _But_ with that said, I also think your mom's right, kid. She may be a Broadway legend and thousands of people may be weirdly obsessed with her facial features, but she's also just a normal person at the end of the day. She's just Shelby. She's just your mom."

"I know but she is also a star," Rachel countered back, not relenting. "I don't know. It's just—she was kind of my idol growing up, Aunt Kim."

"She was mine too," Kim nodded in understanding. "Still is, but I've learned to separate the two. I get it, Rae. Maybe it's easier for me to compartmentalize because I've known her all my life and you're just starting to get to know her now. But _trust me_ , non-famous Shelby is way cooler and even better than famous Shelby."

Kim turned her head to look over at her niece who seemed to be deep in thought while she ate her s'more.

"Do you know what we did after Shelly won the Tony?" Kim asked, trying to change up her strategy.

Rachel's face lit up at the question, figuring she was about to hear exclusive scoop on Shelby Corcoran.

" _Please_ tell me you went to all the after-parties," she said excitedly. "Who did you get to see? Did you meet Hugh Jackman? He was the host that year."

"We went to the diner where your mom used to work and had waffles," Kim cut her off. "Actually, she made them for us in the kitchen cause they were closing up and had already sent their cooks home. She was literally wearing her Tony gown while she cooked us waffles."

"No way!" Rachel's mouth fell open in shock. "I did not know that. Why didn't you guys go to any of the parties? She was the star of that night!"

"That's what Shelly wanted," Kim shrugged and chuckled at the memory. "She was exhausted and starving by the end of the night, and she just wanted to celebrate with us and with her close friends that worked there and with waffles."

"Mom is crazy," Rachel decided, shaking her head in disbelief.

"And did you know that even after 'Wicked' really blew up that your mom never moved out of her studio? Your grandma yelled at her for years to move into a safer and more livable apartment especially since she would have been able to afford it at that point. Shelly only compromised by fixing it up, but she lived there until she moved back to Lima."

Rachel scrunched up her eyebrows in confusion. Her mom really needed lessons on how to take advantage of being a star.

"And a few years ago, when they asked your mom to lead in and help open the 'Wicked' production on the West End, you know why she turned it down?" Kim asked, moving to make her final and most favorite point about her sister.

"Wasn't she teaching by then?"

"Yes, but she had just finished up her Master's and could've gone. They gave her an incredible offer. But she said no because I was pregnant then with Robby and Lily. She said she didn't want to be away from me in case I needed her and she didn't want to miss the chance to see her niece and nephew be born."

Rachel smiled at that. Her mom sounds like an awesome big sister.

"And I'm not saying that your mom is some martyr," Kim continued. "She wasn't a victim of her fame. I mean, she's best friends with April Rhodes, so you already know that they had fun and definitely leaned into the glamor of it all. All I'm saying is that more often than not, your mom was just herself through it all. She always put her family and her friends first. She always wanted normal things like waffles after a long night or just a small and comfortable place to call her own. You know, despite all the fame she was able to achieve, none of that really changed."

"Wow," is all that Rachel could say. Her mind was blown.

"Yeah, none of that is on the internet, huh? I know it'll probably take some time, Rae. And I know that you're excited about your mom's fame. It really is amazing, but I also know that I think your mom would really appreciate it if you tried to separate the two. I know she loves that you're passionate about this and I'm sure she's looking forward to being able to share that part of her with you in the future, but maybe, for right now, just focus on getting to know your mom Shelby at the moment and not star Shelby?"

"Yeah—okay," Rachel complied easily, but still letting what her aunt just told her marinate in her head. "I hear ya, Aunt Kim. And I will try my best. But I still do think that mom should make an Instagram."

"Absolutely no chance!" Shelby said loudly as she snuck up behind her sister and grabbed her shoulders, causing a very startled Kim to flail around and scream in shock.

"Shelly!" Kim whined in embarrassment.

"And _that_ is what you call payback baby sis," Shelby said triumphantly while she looked over at her laughing kid. She'd never get sick of hearing her daughter's laugh.

"Mom, you're so mean," Rachel joked, still trying to control her fit of giggles.

"Oh yeah? I'm no longer _extraordinary?"_ Shelby teased, snaking her arm around to tickle Rachel's side lightly, earning another hearty laugh from her child. _Pure bliss._

"Nope," Rachel chuckled. "Aunt Kim just told me how lame you are. Just kidding. I get it. Sorry I get carried away. I know you're a star, but I also know that you're something else."

"Yeah? What's that, baby?"

" _The_ most respected and esteemed show choir coach in the country!"

Shelby and Kim both grabbed a pillow and lightly smacked Rachel with it. Like minds.

"I'm just kidding!" Rachel laughed and also grabbed a pillow to arm herself. "I'm joking. I meant you're also just my mom. You're my mom, and that's my favorite part of you."

* * *

 **A/N:** **Thanks for reading, hope you guys enjoyed this! I've been wanting to flesh out more of Shelby's history in NY (and will continue to do so slowly). I'd love to hear what you think!**

 **Next chapter is some fun with Quinn and Rachel... who solemnly swear that they're up to no good.**


	12. Chapter 12

"What's on your mind, kiddo?" Shelby asked as she took her sunglasses off and perched them on top of her head. She wanted a better look at her daughter who seemed to be living in her head at the moment.

It was the Friday before Thanksgiving and Shelby was driving Rachel to McKinley. After their weekend together, Hiram asked Shelby if she could start taking Rachel to school in the morning and she agreed without hesitation, acting like he had just given her the moon. They also worked out a schedule of when Rachel can spend some time with her to provide their daughter some consistency. For now, Rachel would spend Monday, Wednesday, and Friday evenings with her and one day every weekend depending on when Shelby had VA rehearsal.

If it were up to her, she'd have Rachel for the full week, every other week like they discussed with the custody arrangement, but she knew that Rachel was still adjusting. At the very least, she got to see her child every day. She had to move things around and had to drive the opposite way of Carmel every morning, but her commute with her daughter was quickly becoming the very best part of her day. She's never felt more of a mom than driving her kid to school and she relished in every single second of it.

Luckily, Rachel seemed to be a morning person so she was usually in an agreeable mood. They often chatted about what their plans were for the day and even more often sang along to whatever short playlist Rachel put together that morning. During the past couple days they had been working through the greatest hits of the '80s. She was ready for some more Prince this morning, but instead her kid had started to play what seemed to be a set of the saddest ballads she could find. She had also been rather quiet and was intently looking out the window, definitely not paying attention to Shelby.

"Rach?" Shelby called her attention. After a second of no response she reached out and lightly touched her forearm and only then did Rachel turn to face her mom, snapping out of the state she was in. "What's going on love, you okay?" The mother prompted again.

Rachel blinked and looked at her mom in surprise. _How long has she not been listening?_ She shook her head a little as if to physically shake off the trance that she had apparently been in.

"Sorry," Rachel finally said, straightening up in her seat and smoothing down her skirt, a nervous habit of hers that Shelby had recently picked up on. Rachel bit her bottom lip and paused for a few moments. "When was the last time you talked to daddy?"

Shelby furrowed her brows at the unexpected question and thought carefully for a second.

"I was on the phone with your dads Wednesday night to talk about Thanksgiving next week," she replied. "And then we texted a bit yesterday. Why do you ask, love?"

"Well, I don't know. Since I haven't had my phone, we haven't really talked a lot. Every time I try to call him at night, he's busy with his evening class," Rachel responded, surprising Shelby with how easily she had offered up information. "And before, I would usually call him in the morning right when I got up since I know he wakes up early too or text him during the day. I'm just wondering. I guess I just miss him."

Shelby felt her heart sink. Apart from touching on it briefly during their big talk, this was the first time that Rachel had willingly shared any thoughts on the situation with her fathers. She knew she had to tread slowly. Recently, Rachel had started to open up but it was still at a glacial pace. Her daughter had seemingly built an impenetrable fortress around her feelings and Shelby was very cautiously trying to break it down brick by brick.

"I'm sorry, Rach. I didn't know you were having trouble reaching your dad. I do think he's just busy with finals and preparing for London. But he'll be here the week after Thanksgiving and he'll be around for your birthday and until after Christmas, right? And you're also getting your phone privileges fully reinstated today, so that should help?"

"Mhmm," Rachel simply responded. "Yeah, I suppose you're right. Sorry."

Shelby frowned. She never wanted Rachel to apologize for expressing how she felt. She sighed as she pulled up to McKinley. This would've been a good opportunity for them to dig a little deeper, but she wasn't about to probe now and send her child to school upset. She glanced at Rachel and could practically see her put her show face back on. Her kid was scary good at putting on a false front. She would know. That was also her move.

"Rachel—"

"It's okay, mom," the girl said decisively, flashing her mom one of her signature megawatt smiles for good measure. "I'm fine. Thanks for driving me. I'll see you later, right?"

Rachel hastily unbuckled her seatbelt and moved to open the car door but Shelby reacted faster and locked it before she could leave. She grabbed her free wrist and Rachel reluctantly turned around to meet her mother's concerned and prying green eyes.

"I'm sorry you've been having trouble reaching your dad, Rach. How about we both talk to him together later and we can all come up with a plan. Maybe the two of you can pick a time that works for the both of you, so you can chat at least once a day just like how I call you before bed every night?" Shelby suggested, knowing full-well that Rachel would wait until pigs could fly to ask her dad for this one thing.

"Okay, that sounds good," Rachel nodded and gave her mom a small smile, a genuine one this time. "Thanks."

Shelby peeked at the clock and noticed she had a few more minutes.

"No need to thank me, Rach. I told you I just want to help, and I really mean that. Thank you for telling me how you feel. And baby, I'm sorry that you've been having a hard time keeping in touch with your dad. That was an unintended consequence of your punishment. But I promise you that we never want to keep you from him, so all you have to do is ask me and I will help you reach your daddy whenever you need him."

Rachel nodded gratefully. She knew she couldn't talk to her dad about it. Talking about Leroy seemed to set him off, so she just tried her best to avoid it. Honestly, she also avoided it. Period. Sure, she had learned to live with the fact that her dads were divorced, but has she accepted it? Or was she dealing with it? That was a different story. Although things have been a little easier recently since her reunion with Shelby has distracted her immensely, there were still some moments where it just hits her and she's suddenly grappling with the intense heartbreak she feels about her dads' divorce.

Hiram and Leroy tried their complete best to explain why they were breaking up their family to their daughter. Fundamentally, Rachel understood, or at least tried her best to. They grew apart and got lost in their roles. Something about unmet expectations and lack of individual identity. Regardless, she couldn't swallow any of that because she was still choking on the sheer shock of it all. Unexpected wouldn't even begin to describe it. They all went to dinner at her favorite restaurant and saw the touring company of "Beauty and the Beast" together the night before they broke the news. The next day, Rachel was in the middle of composing a three-part harmony for "Be My Guest" for them to sing together when they interrupted her and turned her life upside down. She was absolutely blindsided. She didn't know how to process, she couldn't, so she went into autopilot. The next thing she knew, she was packing up her entire life and moving to Lima. Shortly after that, she was meeting her mom for the first time. Rachel appreciates drama more than most people, but definitely not when it was consuming her life. Everything was changing. And she was struggling to keep up. More often than not, she felt like all she was doing was trying to swim above the fray.

She didn't realize she had been deeply engrossed in her thoughts until her mom opened the passenger door, causing her to flinch in surprise as the cool air hit her. Before she could say anything, Shelby gently pulled her out of the car and wrapped her up in a hug. She instantly felt some of her stress dissipate. There was something about being in her mother's arms that provided a calming effect over her that she couldn't quite explain. She felt Shelby tighten her hold as if her mom was reading her mind.

"You're much too beautiful to be frowning like that, pretty girl. Whatever is going on in your head, it'll all be okay. I promise, Rachel."

She nodded against Shelby's chest and tried to absorb in all of the love and security she felt. She closed her eyes and allowed herself to be embraced for a few more moments. As she pulled away, Rachel let out a sigh that, in Shelby's opinion, sounded like a much too-adult sound coming from the young teenager.

"Thanks," Rachel said genuinely. "I better go in. I'll see you after glee?"

"Yes, ma'am. I don't have rehearsal tonight, so I will pick you up right after your practice is over and then we'll grab some dinner together."

Shelby carefully examined her child one last time and immediately pulled her into another hug. She can't help it. Shelby saw sadness and confusion warring within Rachel. It filled her with a powerful need to gather her in her arms and shield her away from all the unnecessary hurt and pain.

"Mom, you're embarrassing me," Rachel whined but didn't move to pull away. Shelby grinned and kissed the top of her head.

"Sorry kiddo, I'm just going to miss you," she said sadly as she brushed Rachel's hair out of her face and kissed her forehead.

"You're so dramatic," Rachel laughed and stepped away from her mom's clutches. "I'll see you in like eight hours."

"Wish it was sooner," Shelby pouted as she pushed out her bottom lip and fake frowned.

"Goodbye, mother," Rachel rolled her eyes, waving Shelby off in irritation. _And her dads wonder where she gets the theatrics from._

"Bye, baby! Have a good day!" Shelby called to her daughter while she walked away.

Rachel turned beet red, spun around, and shot Shelby an annoyed look that only an embarrassed teenager can muster.

" _Mooom!"_

"I love you! Make good choices!"

Rachel hurried her pace and practically sprinted towards the door before anybody noticed that the crazy woman was with her. Shelby slipped her sunglasses back on and smirked in satisfaction. _Embarrass her kid in public? Check._

* * *

The moment Rachel walked into the freshmen hallway, a pair of rough hands grabbed her from out of nowhere and pushed her forcibly to the wall. Before she could process what was happening, she found herself backed up against a locker and felt a brief but shooting pain from where her head collided with the metal surface.

"Welcome to Loser-Town, Berry," Dave Karofsky jeered. "Population: you."

He let out a sick laugh in amusement and high-fived one of his jock cronies in twisted satisfaction.

"That's right, Karofsky! Shove a defenseless girl against a locker and then run away! You coward!" Rachel yelled angrily after the bully.

She had half a thought to run after him and slap the stupid look off his face. She made a step to do so before somebody from behind tugged on her backpack to hold her back. She balled up her fists and quickly turned around, ready to fight her next antagonizer.

"Woah, Rachel!" Quinn said in alarm with her hands up. "I'm sorry, it's just me. Karofsky's not worth it."

"Oh, I _definitely_ know that ingrate isn't worth it," Rachel growled as she brushed herself off and continued her walk to her locker. "I'm just so sick of him and all the jocks acting like they can do whatever they want. Just yesterday, they pushed Artie down the stairs. It was only a few steps, but seriously, who does that!"

"He's probably just still pissed about you defending Kurt the other day," Quinn replied, trying to reign in her friend's justified anger. "No one's ever stood up to him before and he's embarrassed. I heard Azimio and those other guys giving him a hard time about it after Cheerios practice this morning."

"Good," Rachel huffed. "He should be ashamed of his atrocious behavior. It's completely reprehensible. And all I'm saying is that next time he lays his brutish hands on me, he's got another thing coming."

"You know, you kind of always look like a disgruntled middle-aged librarian and you sort of sound like one too, but you surprise me constantly, Berry."

"I'm not kidding, Quinn," Rachel said in annoyance while she opened her locker and then briefly paused to face the blonde. "My daddy grew up in public housing in the South Side of Chicago. He taught me how to fight and defend myself. I'm not going to take whatever those lumbering idiots have to dish lying down."

Quinn watched as something flashed across Rachel's face at the mention of one of her dads, but it happened so fast, she couldn't register the emotion.

"You're right," she agreed. "But just promise me you won't respond to the violence with violence. There are other ways we can resolve this. Strength in numbers and all that."

Rachel nodded her head noncommittally while she pulled her books out for the first half of the day.

"Anyway, what are you even doing here?" Rachel questioned. "You're usually grabbing breakfast with Britt and Santana right now after your morning practice."

"Already had my daily serving of bacon, thanks for asking. But I was looking for you, because—what are you doing after school today?"

"We have glee and then I'm having dinner with my mom."

"Wrong. We're hanging out first and then you're having dinner with Shelby. Mr. Schue canceled practice."

"What, why?" Rachel groaned in exasperation. This was the second rehearsal that their amateur coach canceled this week. She sighed and decided that she really needed to have a firm discussion with the man about taking show choir more seriously. Regionals was coming up and they were wholly unprepared. She closed her locker in frustration, a little more forcefully than she had intended. Today was not going well at all and the day had barely started.

"Don't know, don't really care, but please hang out with me after school today," Quinn pleaded, ignoring Rachel's look of disapproval. "C'mon it's my first day of freedom, and there's something I need to do later and I don't want to go alone. You owe me after your brilliant plan to Uber to Carmel. And you can't keep ignoring me, Rachel."

Quinn didn't mean to add the last part in but it was the truth. Yes, they had both been grounded to varying degrees recently and no, Rachel wasn't blatantly ignoring her, but she had still been distant and aloof. And Quinn knows when someone is blowing her off because it doesn't happen to her too often. Or ever, really. She is Quinn Fabray after all.

"I'm sorry," Rachel apologized as she met Quinn's hazel eyes, feeling the guilt rise up in her chest. "I've just been preoccupied."

Which happened to be the case, but she was also avoiding Quinn. And she knew it wasn't fair because it's not like the popular cheerleader had done anything obviously wrong to her, but every time she saw Quinn she felt the rampant jealousy swirl inside of her. Still, it wasn't Quinn's fault that she served as a reminder of the fact that her mom was kept from her, for no good reason, in her opinion.

"It's fine," Quinn said accepting the apology easily. She had talked to her mom at length about the situation with Rachel and Shelby the other day and the whole thing thoroughly blew her mind. If it was her, she's sure that she'd be dying her hair pink and hanging out with The Skanks in defiant rebellion. Her mom tried to explain all of the adults' reasoning to Quinn. But like Rachel, she was just a young teenager and her mind couldn't really grasp the complexities of the decisions that were made. That understanding would only come with more time and more life experiences. All she could see was that Shelby gave birth to Rachel, signed her over to her dads, agreed not to see her until she was an adult, changed her mind, and now wanted to be a part of her daughter's life. Clearly, Shelby loves Rachel but why did she not try to get her back sooner? Why let Rachel grow up without a mom unnecessarily? Surely if Quinn was ever in her position, she would fight for her daughter.

She was so wrapped up in her thoughts that she didn't realize she was in somewhat of a stupor until Rachel started waving her hand in front of her face trying to capture her attention.

"Hello? Earth to Quinn," Rachel said, her voice laced with irritation. Once she finally had her friend's attention, she continued. "I said fine, but I have to check with my mom if that's okay, so I'll tell you if I can come during bio. What are we even doing?"

"Hey," Quinn interjected, needing to say this to her friend right now. "I—I just want you to know that if you ever need anyone to talk to about this whole mom thing or even the dads thing that you can always come to me. Or if you don't want to talk, that's cool too. I'll just be around or whatever."

Rachel's facial features and body language instantly softened and she felt a surge of appreciation for her new friend swell within her. It'd take some time, but she's determined to work through the jealousy. She doesn't want to lose one of her only friends at the moment if she can't overcome it. She doesn't really know why Quinn is being so nice to her, but she's not about to question it now.

"Thanks Quinn," she replied, grateful for the offer. Not that she's jumping at it, but it was nice to know it was there. "And I've got your back too, which is why I'll come with you later. But let it be known that I'm doing so begrudgingly."

"That's expected," Quinn grumbled, rolling her eyes. "Just meet me at my locker after school. I convinced one of the seniors on the Cheerios to drive us to the Lima Bean. Don't be late!"

* * *

The rest of Rachel's school day went without a hitch. Fortunately, there wasn't another Karofsky sighting. In general, students and teachers alike seemed to be checked out, ready for the holiday next week. It was boring. And for someone who usually loved excitement, she was starting to really appreciate it when things were boring for once.

"I truly don't understand why you can't just tell me what we're doing here," Rachel complained for the millionth time since meeting up with Quinn after school.

"Listen Berry, _I_ don't even really know what we're doing here," Quinn replied. "I just have a hunch, okay?"

"A hunch about what?" Rachel inquired. "Quinn, if we're doing anything illegal or _worse,_ anything that can get me grounded by my mother again, I swear—"

Quinn sucked in a breath at the loss of her patience. _Man, Rachel can be annoying._ She opened her mouth to respond, but then closed it, turned on her heel, and walked away instead.

"What—Quinn!" Rachel whined, rooted to her spot on the sidewalk outside of the Lima Bean. She huffed indignantly when she saw the blonde quicken her pace at her call.

"Asks me for help and doesn't even tell me why," Rachel muttered to herself as she unwillingly followed her friend into the coffee shop.

Once she set foot into the cafe, she walked right into the cheerleader's back. Quinn was on a one-track mind searching for somebody as her eyes expertly scanned the crowded room.

"If you'd just tell me who you're looking for, I can help," Rachel offered. Quinn continued to ignore her and she sighed at the lack of response. "Fine. If you don't need me, then I will go and get myself a cup of tea."

Rachel began to walk away but before she could take another step, Quinn hastily grabbed her arm, pulled her halfway across the room weaving through tables and people, and yanked her to the floor behind a pillar and a tall fake plant.

Noting Rachel's completely startled expression, Quinn quickly covered her mouth with her hand, earning a deathly scowl from the diva that almost rivaled a Coach Corcoran glare.

"I'm _only_ going to take my hand off if you _promise_ you're not going to yell," Quinn whispered from her crouched down position. Rachel shot her another venomous look in return. "Rachel, promise me you won't make a scene."

The aggravated teen rolled her eyes and nodded. Quinn reluctantly pulled her hand off with bated breath.

"You're absolutely losing it, Fabray," Rachel whispered back angrily through gritted teeth.

"Look at the table in the far left corner," Quinn cut her off before she could commence her meltdown.

Rachel squinted her eyes in a purely dramatic fashion and examined the large room. Once she found what Quinn was trying to point out, irritation automatically coursed through her entire body.

"Are you _kidding_ me!" Rachel exclaimed in a half-whisper. "Mr. Schue canceled New Directions practice so he can go on a _date?!"_

"And not just _any_ date. On a date with my _sister_ ," Quinn said in a sincerely unbelieving manner.

Rachel's eyes widened taking in the beautiful woman sitting across from Mr. Schue. Her honey blonde hair cascaded over her slim shoulders and her bright sea green eyes twinkled while she laughed at what was undoubtedly a lame joke from her glee coach.

"You're joking," Rachel said in equal disbelief. " _That's_ Frannie? What is she doing? I thought Mr. Schue was married!"

"Shh!" Quinn hushed the girl before they drew any attention to themselves. "I don't know, I heard he got divorced this past summer. Something about his wife pretending to be pregnant and then trying to take a student's baby or something crazy like that."

"Um—what? Anyway, how long has he been dating your sister?"

"I have no idea," Quinn said, her face contorting into a perfectly annoyed expression. "She's been acting super weird recently and she's been busy, but being really secretive about what she's doing. Anyway, I was over last night and I wasn't snooping, okay? But I was washing the dishes after our dinner while Fran went to take a shower and her phone started ringing and it said 'Acafella' on the caller ID, so I picked it up cause I thought it might be one of her clients or something, and I said hello but they hung up right away. I was like okay, whatever and then went back to washing the dishes, but then a few minutes later 'Acafella' texted, and it said 'Close call. Your sister picked up, but just wanted to remind you to meet me at the Lima Bean at 4 p.m. tomorrow.'"

"Oh my god, so did you know the whole day then that she was coming here to meet Mr. Schue?" Rachel asked excitedly, intrigued by the drama of it all.

"No! Absolutely not," Quinn replied, her voice dripping with disgust. "I thought Mr. Schue canceling practice was just coincidence. I didn't know he'd do it so he can hang out with _my sister."_

Quinn literally shuddered at the thought. Rachel placed a comforting hand on her unsettled friend's shoulder and gave her a sympathetic smile. She's an only child, but she can only imagine the discomfort at finding out your one and only big sister is dating your teacher.

"I'm sorry, Quinn," she said solemnly. "Please do let me know if there's anything I can do for you at this time. Wait—maybe they're not even dating, maybe they're just friends?"

The two teenagers glanced over at the couple and in that very same moment watched Will lean over and place a quick and chaste kiss on Frannie's lips. Quinn groaned in response and wished right then and there that the ground would open up and swallow her whole.

"Never mind," Rachel said disappointedly. She turned to inspect Frannie again who genuinely seemed to be enjoying Will's company. "Well, at least she looks happy?"

"And that's fine, I want her to be happy, but can she please be happy with anyone else that's not my teacher _and_ my show choir coach _?_ " Quinn griped, feeling frustrated and embarrassed about the whole thing. "And she's hiding it from me! Clearly, if she's keeping this a secret, then it's something that she shouldn't be doing."

"I know something else two sneaky little girls _shouldn't_ be doing," a voice from behind them said in such a stern tone that unnerved both Rachel and Quinn immediately.

Before they could turn around, a pair of hands grabbed the troublemakers by their back collars and pulled them up to their feet to face her.

Quinn's complexion paled significantly at the sight of her mother. She swallowed thickly taking in Judy Fabray's firm countenance, her perfectly raised eyebrow, and the unmistakable look of steel in her eyes.

"Mommy—before you say anything, I _did_ get permission from you to come here, so I really don't think I'm doing anything wrong," Quinn blurted out defensively.

"Don't you mommy me, little girl," Judy said as she crossed her arms over her chest. "If you're not doing anything wrong, then please tell me why the two of you are sneaking around and hiding in the corner," she demanded.

Rachel met the woman's eye contact for the first time and recognition sunk in. It's like she was seeing a hybrid older version of Quinn and Frannie. At the same time, Judy was also studying the petite brunette standing in front of her. Her breath caught in her throat soaking up how eerily similar she looked to the oldest Corcoran daughter. In the meanwhile, Quinn stood frozen with fear, trying to strategize her best way out of this. Before she could respond, her mom dropped her arms, took a timid step forward, and grabbed Rachel's hand.

"You are so beautiful, Rachel," Judy said softly as her anger waned. "You look _just_ like your mom when she was your age."

"Oh, thanks," Rachel said meekly. She blushed and dropped her gaze, feeling bashful but elated at the same time at being compared to her gorgeous mother. "It's nice to finally meet you, Mrs. Fabray."

Judy wanted to pull the young girl in for a hug but opted to gently squeeze her hand in response. Her heart swelled thinking about the happiness she felt for her best friends being reunited with their granddaughter.

"Please, call me Judy. And it's _really_ good to meet you too, Rachel," she smiled kindly.

Quinn smirked watching the interaction play out. Maybe her mom's unfailing sappiness will be her saving grace today. However, that thought didn't last long when Judy let go of Rachel's hand and promptly turned her attention back to her scheming daughter and narrowed her eyes suspiciously.

"I'm still waiting for an answer, Lucy Quinn," Judy commanded, shifting back into mom-mode in a record of 0.02 seconds.

"Did you know that Fran is dating my teacher?" Quinn grimaced while she turned her body and pointed to the couple at the opposite side of the room, who were both still very much unaware of everything that was going on around them.

Judy peered at her older daughter who seemed to be intently absorbed with the curly-haired man sitting across from her and sighed.

"Yes, I did know that Frannie was seeing somebody," she answered. "But I did not know that she was dating Mr. Schuester."

"See!" Quinn said in vindication. "She's keeping it from you too! Which means that it's wrong. You always tell us that lying by omission is still lying. _Mom,_ you _have_ to talk to her and tell her not to date Mr. Schue. Please?"

Judy ran her hand through her blonde locks and thought quickly for a moment. On one hand, she understands where her younger daughter was coming from. It was an awkward situation. On the other hand, she couldn't tell her older daughter what to do regarding her love life. As long as Frannie was in a happy, healthy relationship and her significant other treated her with kindness and respect, Frannie was a grown woman, she couldn't dictate her daughter's relationships.

"Quinn, honey," the mother proceeded cautiously. "I realize that this may be somewhat uncomfortable, but maybe your sister didn't tell us because she's not ready to share it with us yet. I know that this is still new and we also don't know if it's anything serious. Frannie didn't tell us for a reason, and we have to respect that. _If and only if_ this is something that your sister chooses to pursue, we can all talk about it together. We will discuss boundaries, so that it is as painless for you as possible. I promise you that, Quinnie."

"But mom, still—" Quinn began to argue and Judy instantly held up her hand and wagged her exquisitely manicured finger to stop her.

"No, Q. Your sister is a grown up. If she's happy, we cannot stop her from dating whomever she wants," Judy said firmly. "I am sorry that it apparently ended up being your teacher, but we just have to wait to see how this unfolds. I promise you that you will get the chance to share how you feel. _But_ sneaking around to spy on Frannie is not acceptable. I know she would not appreciate that. And I _definitely_ know that you like it when your sister respects your privacy."

Quinn felt her throat dry up and the guilt begin to grow inside of her. She snuck a peek at Rachel who was wringing her hands apprehensively, electing to stay silent at the moment.

"Are you going to tell her?" Quinn asked, dropping her head in shame.

"No honey, you are," Judy said encouragingly. "But not right now. We are going to let your sissy enjoy her date and I actually came here to pick you up early. There was an opening in Dr. Howell's office. Carl said he can squeeze you in before he closes, so you don't have to come in early tomorrow morning," the older woman felt her face flush thinking about the handsome young dentist.

Quinn groaned for the umpteenth time that afternoon. First her sister, now the dentist. The universe was not being kind to one Lucy Quinn Fabray today. Rachel grabbed her hand in understanding and gave it a compassionate squeeze.

"Rachel, do you have a ride home?" Judy asked. "We still have some time and I'd be more than happy to take you to your dads' or your mom's?"

Rachel paused momentarily and pulled out her phone and read over her most recent text messages.

"Oh, actually, my mom said she's hanging out downtown too, so I can just tell her to meet me here," Rachel grinned. She had missed her mom. "But thank you anyway, Mrs. Fabray."

Judy nodded and smiled widely at Rachel. She was a lovely young woman, and she couldn't wait for her old friends to meet her too.

"Anytime, Rachel. Do you want us to wait for your mom with you?"

Rachel looked at Quinn who didn't seem too pleased at the turn of events and decided she would help end her friend's misery sooner rather than later.

"No, that's okay," she assured her. "It shouldn't take her that long to get here. I'll just order a drink in the meanwhile. Sorry, Quinn. Text me later?"

"Sure will," Quinn said dejectedly as she accepted a brief hug from Rachel. "Thanks for coming with me."

"Anytime, anywhere," Rachel whispered, not wanting Judy Fabray to hear her promise to her friend. The woman intimidated her just as much as her mother did.

Judy bit back a smirk at the exchange between the two teenagers. It seemed as though her and Shelby some double trouble on their hands.

* * *

"That'll be $2.72," the barista said as he rung up Rachel's order. She pulled out a five dollar bill from her wallet to pay for it but a hand from behind her snatched it up and gave the employee a credit card instead.

"It's on me," Shelby smiled at her kid who turned around to look at her in surprise.

"Thanks, mom," Rachel said appreciatively while she took the money back from her mother.

"Anything for my favorite daughter," Shelby replied as she put her arm around Rachel's shoulders and pulled her in for a quick side hug.

"I'm your _only_ daughter."

"Then aren't you a lucky one," Shelby teased.

Rachel laughed and rolled her eyes in a playful manner at her mom.

"Sorry mom, did you want anything? I'm sure he can still take your order."

"Nope," Shelby said holding up a half-eaten strawberry ice cream cone with her other arm. "I'm good, baby. Thanks. Some sugar for my sugar?" She offered a bite to her daughter.

"You are so weird," Rachel shook her head in amusement but leaned over to take a small taste of the delicious treat. "So good, but it's freezing outside."

"Hey now, if there's only one thing that you learn from me, it's that there is _never_ not a good time for some strawberry ice cream," Shelby insisted.

"Lemon ginger tea with honey for Rachel!" The barista called.

Rachel went up to the counter and picked up her steaming cup of tea. She walked back to her mom who had a thoroughly intrigued expression written across her face.

"What?" Rachel questioned.

"Nothing, kiddo," Shelby replied, amused by her daughter's choice of drink, which also happened to be her go-to. "You just continue to surprise me, that's all."

"You're not the first one who's said that to me today," Rachel said, recalling Quinn's comment in the morning. She walked over to an open table and sat down.

"Yeah? How was your day, baby?" Shelby asked curiously as she took the seat across from her daughter.

"It was boring and also kind of interesting," the teenager stated without any elaboration. "How was your day?"

"How so? My day was fine. Actually, it was kind of hectic. Hence the stress eating," the older woman remarked, taking the final bite of her ice cream cone.

"Did your Vocal Adrenaline automatons keep you really busy today?" Rachel asked with a sly grin.

"You could say that," Shelby chuckled, letting her daughter's jab roll off her back. "We have our Annual Holiday Showcase coming up and it's a really big event and performance for us. It's honestly more for the District and Carmel administrators and our Booster Club than anything else. It just feels like the more successful we are, the bigger this event becomes, but it's fine. Anyway, sorry for complaining, kiddo. It'll be alright, this is not your old mom's first time at the rodeo."

Rachel's face fell slightly examining her mother. She does look somewhat exhausted. In the few weeks that she's known her, she has yet to see or even hear her mom even a little bit unhinged. This was her first encounter with a stressed-out Shelby.

"You'll be fine, mom," Rachel said in total conviction. Her mom was Shelby Corcoran. From where Rachel was standing, there wasn't a single thing that Shelby couldn't handle. "You're so good at your job, and as much as I _hate_ to admit it, your VA kids are annoyingly talented, so I'm sure it'll all come together."

Shelby smiled at her thoughtful kid. _How did she get so lucky?_

"Thanks, baby," she said gratefully and leaned over and rubbed Rachel's arm affectionately. "I appreciate that. And I missed you, so please tell me more about your day?"

Rachel paused and watched Frannie and Mr. Schue walk out of the coffee shop hand in hand out of the corner of her eyes. She took a sip of her tea before placing it back down on the table and pushing it towards Shelby to share.

"Mom?"

"Yeah, Rach?" Shelby replied, accepting Rachel's offer and bringing the warm liquid up to her mouth.

"Have you—have you ever dated anyone?"

Shelby instantly choked on her drink at the incredibly random question. She coughed uncomfortably and Rachel cocked her head in confusion watching her mom squirm.

"Wh-what, baby? Where is this coming from?" Shelby finally croaked out as she cleared her throat and straightened up in her chair.

"Quinn and I saw Mr. Schuester on a date with her sister Frannie," Rachel responded casually. "They were all here earlier."

" _That's_ an interesting development," Shelby said, fascinated by the news.

"Quinn doesn't think so," Rachel giggled.

"No, I bet she doesn't," Shelby joined in her daughter's laughter. She hesitated for a second and then womaned-up. "Yes. I did date someone back in New York. We knew each other for about five years and then dated for a little more than four of that. We broke up just before I moved back here."

"Oh," Rachel said, thinking deeply about what her mom just shared. "That's a long time to be together. What—why did you guys break up? How come you never got married?"

"Lots of reasons, baby," Shelby sighed and gave her a small smile. She wanted to be as honest as possible without digging too much into it. "We just—I don't know, we got along really well. He was great. And I did love him and I think he loved me too. We just wanted different things in the end."

Rachel frowned in response. She could hear the heartbreak in her mom's voice. She wanted to ask who it was but she didn't want to pry. She never knew that her mom dated anyone. It wasn't in anything that she read about Shelby Corcoran on the Internet. Now that she thinks about it, there's a lot of things she doesn't know about her mom's past life in New York. She must've been really careful about sharing her private life with the press.

"I'm sorry that it didn't work out," Rachel said sadly.

"Oh, no baby, it's perfectly okay," she assured her daughter. "We're not best friends or anything like that, but things ended amicably. And it's fine, everything worked out. I mean, I do have you now."

Rachel's face immediately lit up. She really loved how much her mom loved her.

"And I'm enough?" She couldn't help but ask.

"More than enough," Shelby promised. "You're my number one priority right now, Rach. Nothing else comes before you."

Rachel nodded conscientiously and found herself truly believing her mom in that moment.

"So," Shelby said, interrupting Rachel's thoughts. "What about you, young lady. Have you dated anyone?"

Rachel felt her cheeks burn red. Now she understands why her mom was so thrown off earlier.

"No," Rachel said blushing. "Daddy said I'm not allowed to date until I'm 18 and Dad said I'm not allowed to have a boyfriend until I'm 30 and I have a college degree and _at least_ two Tony's."

"Ha!" Shelby chortled at the overprotective dads. "I will talk to your fathers about settling on an age for when you can start dating. But I do agree with them, I still think you're too young and I think you should just continue to focus on school and glee and everything else."

"Yeah, it's okay, it's not like any boys are interested in me right now anyways," Rachel said without thinking about it.

"Are _you_ interested in any boys?"

"No mom," Rachel replied, beginning to woefully regret ever bringing this subject up. "I think I'm more interested in making some more friends."

Shelby looked up and watched a crestfallen expression take over Rachel's beautiful face. She felt her heart drop and grabbed Rachel's hand in her own and began to rub calming circles on the back of her hand with her thumb. She doesn't know if the soothing action was more for her or for her daughter.

"You're having trouble making friends, Rach?" Shelby asked, her voice filled with concern.

"No, it's fine," Rachel shook her head, trying to walk it back. "I have Quinn and Kurt. And I'm friendly with the kids in the glee club. But other kids at school just don't get me. I don't know. It's fine, mom. I just miss my friends in Chicago. I miss how it used to be."

"I'm sorry, baby," Shelby said empathetically. "I know there's been a lot of changes recently. And I'm sorry that kids at McKinley don't really understand you. But I want you to know that I get you. And I get that you're really wonderful. And that you are unique, and talented, and smart. You're opinionated as heck kid, but you are you. And people will always be intimidated by those traits in a person. But I promise you, Rach, that in time, you will also find a group of friends here who will love and appreciate that about you like I do."

"You're my mom, you have to say that," Rachel replied but couldn't help the smile that graced her lips.

"And I'll say it every day until you believe me, kid," Shelby smirked.

"Thanks, mom," Rachel said in appreciation.

"I meant it, baby. And—circling back to dating. I just have one last thing I need to say."

"Mom, no," the teen whined. "I heard you. Not allowed to date yet. You have to talk to my dads about it."

"Right," Shelby confirmed and then braced herself for what she was about to say next. "I promise—we're not going to have the _talk_ right now, Rach. But I just want you to know that you can _always_ come talk to me if you ever have any questions or if you're ever curious at all about any of that. I promise, I'll never be mad if you come to me. I want us to be open about this. You can always talk to me about boys or dating or sex or even anything about your body, okay? If you have any questions at all."

"Mom!" Rachel let out a low groan comprised of pure teenage-embarrassment. She was not prepared to have this conversation with her mother at this time, in the middle of a coffee shop—where all of her classmates and teachers evidently hang out—of all places. "Can we _please_ not talk about this right now?"

"Okay, okay," Shelby relented over her daughter's protests. "But did you hear me, Rach? You _promise_ you will come talk to me if you're thinking about any of that?"

"Yes! I promise," Rachel hissed. She was being honest. She would definitely go to her mother first before either of her dads on this subject matter. "Just please stop talking about it. I'm begging you."

"Alright," Shelby agreed, just as relieved as Rachel that it was over. She can't even stomach the thought of her baby girl even kissing anyone at this point. "Sorry, baby. I had to," she shrugged apologetically.

"You know—you're two for two in the Shamelessly Embarrass Your Kid in Public game today," Rachel glared at her mom jokingly.

"Huh. I guess I am," Shelby said thoughtfully and leaned her back against her chair, extremely pleased with herself. " _Damn,_ I'm good."

"You're the worst," Rachel laughed.

"You love me anyway," Shelby countered back.

"I don't know," Rachel retorted, mirroring her mom's movements and sat back and relaxed in her seat. "Maybe just a little bit."

"Ouch," Shelby fake gasped and placed her hand over her chest in mock pain. "I think I'm going to have to take back my favorite daughter comment from earlier."

"Nope," Rachel grinned broadly. "Once you give that title away, you can't take it back."

Shelby laughed freely, feeling the happiness from being with Rachel surge through her veins. It gave her such a high. Nothing would ever compare to quality time with her kid. She stared at her daughter fondly and savored in at how comfortable Rachel seemed to be around her now. Progress had been made. A foundation had been built. They had come a long way in a short time.

But Shelby also took all of that in with a grain of salt. As she's come to know, every peak that she's climbed with her daughter had unfortunately been met with a trip back down to the valley. They were at the highest point they'd ever reached right now, and Shelby would be lying if she wasn't worried about the inevitable fall.

Rachel stared back at her curiously and gave her a bright and easy smile when she made eye contact. Her heart instantly melted as it always did at her completely amazing child.

Either way, when or if, Shelby vowed to be there to catch her.

* * *

 **A/N:** **Thanks so much for reading and for all the continued love and support for this story. Would love to hear what you all think!**

 **Next chapter is Thanksgiving in EC world.**


	13. Chapter 13

_Thursday, 6:45 a.m., Rachel_

Everybody deals with pressure. Some handle it better than most. Some thrive while others crumble. Usually, Rachel Berry is a cut above the rest. She's resilient. She rises above. And rather impressively for a teenager, she often manages her day-to-day stress with a rigorous diet and exercise. She's up at 6:00 a.m. every day and has a protein shake with banana and flaxseed oil. By 6:10, she's out the door. When she lived in Chicago, she used to hit the elliptical in the gym of their luxury apartment building. But since they moved to Lima, she convinced her dad to let her start running through the neighborhood.

There was a short circuit her dad mapped out that she had to follow. It was an approved three-mile loop that she was instructed not to, under any circumstance, stray away from. She also had to take her phone with her so she could be reached easily and if she didn't want to bring it on her run, she had to leave a note on the kitchen table marking down the time she left the house. Although they lived in a relatively safe and quiet neighborhood, the precautions were there for a reason. Rachel is still very much a young girl and anything can happen, according to her overprotective father. But wanting to give his daughter some independence and recognizing that running helped channel her energy, Hiram relented as long as she followed his rules. And the teenager was always very diligent about adhering to her dad's stipulations. They were easy enough for her to follow in exchange for her needed runs in the morning.

Rachel knows that she's not the most athletic person in the world. Her organized sports career began and ended when she was six-years-old and excitedly kicked the ball into the other team's goal during her first and last pee wee soccer league game. And she only survived middle school gym because she skillfully bribed her more sporty and impressionable peers to protect her during dodgeball in exchange for answers to algebra homework. But the one physical activity apart from dancing that she truly enjoyed was running.

She picked it up from her dad who is an avid runner himself. When Rachel was younger, whenever Hiram trained for his marathons, he often brought his vivacious and energetic little girl along on jogs. He enjoyed the quality time with her and found that it was a positive and healthy way to harness his always adorable but sometimes exhausting ball of fire. Since the move, Rachel adopted her dad's hobby and started running every day as well. Not only did it help keep her in tip-top shape for show choir purposes, she found that it was a good way to de-stress. Running put things into perspective. Everything that she deemed overwhelming always seemed more manageable after a good run. It was working well and it was providing her an outlet to deal with all of the recent upheavals in her life. It usually helped.

Except for today.

It was early Thanksgiving morning and when Rachel was nearing the end of her loop, she hesitated. Her heart pounding, she took one look at her house, picked up her pace, and without looking back, began to run away faster than she's ever ran before in her entire life.

* * *

 _Thursday, 9:15 a.m., Shelby_

Shelby was an exceptionally light sleeper. It was learned behavior from years of living in a scrappy apartment building in a less than desirable borough in New York City. Even when she moved back to Lima, she was unable to break the habit. It was common for her to wake up randomly throughout the night at the most insignificant of sounds.

So, when Shelby woke up Thanksgiving morning to the incessant ringing of the doorbell and glanced at the time, the normally restless sleeper was a little more than shocked at how late she had slept in.

She immediately threw the duvet off and got up in a daze. The ringing of the doorbell was now replaced with rapped and intense knocking. The woman flailed around trying to get her bearings and looked for her phone to no avail. Giving up her search, she slipped on her robe, messily put her hair up, and made her way down the stairs in haste.

A sinking feeling in her stomach grew immediately once she recognized Hiram's muffled voice trying to call her attention. Still flustered, she quickly unlocked the front door and met his deeply concerned expression.

"Hiram? What's going on—"

"Is Rachel here?" He cut her off harshly. "I've been calling you for more than an hour. Why haven't you been picking up?"

"No, Rachel's not here. I-I just woke up. I don't know where my phone is," Shelby stammered and looked at the man questioningly. _Where was her child?_

Hiram clumsily let himself inside the house and paused for a moment to compose himself. He gripped the edge of the entryway table for support and stood up straight, trying to take deep, generous breaths. Shelby swallowed anxiously taking in his frazzled appearance. He was wearing a loose t-shirt and running shorts and was drenched in sweat. It looked like he just sprinted the six miles to her house. He had.

"Hiram? What's happening? Where's Rachel?" Shelby demanded.

"I don't know," Hiram finally answered, still attempting to control his labored breathing. "I thought she was with you. She goes on a run every morning around 6:15 and she's always back by 6:45 the latest. She didn't bring her cell phone. And she didn't write down the time she left. She knows the rules. No phone means to leave a note. I woke up around 6:30. When she wasn't back by 7:00, I left for my run thinking that I'd bump into her. I—Shelby, I ran the loop she does every morning _twice_ and I didn't see her. She hasn't been home. I only ran here looking for her because she asked about doing it the other day. I don't know where she is. And she didn't say she had any plans this morning, I don't think. Did she say anything to you?" He rambled nervously without a single pause.

The mother was fighting down her panic trying to process everything that Hiram just said. She tried to think. _Has Rachel said anything to her?_ She hasn't seen her daughter since the weekend. She got so busy with work that she didn't even have time to take Rachel to school this week or see her Monday or Wednesday evening. She swallowed again and her throat suddenly felt so dry. She shook her head no.

"Fuck," Hiram said breathlessly. "I called Leroy and my family here and no one's heard from her. My neighbor is watching out for her right now and I told her to call me if she sees her come back. Shelby, she doesn't do this. At all. Something's wrong. Can you call her friend Quinn or maybe your sister?"

Shelby was struck with fear, paralyzed, her heart beating at an alarming rate. Her thoughts were also racing, the worst case scenarios running through her head.

"Shelby!" Hiram practically shouted when the woman didn't answer, his panic nearing levels he didn't know even existed.

"Okay, yeah, hang on, let me find my phone," Shelby replied and jumped into action. She walked towards her study with a ferocious purpose.

"What did Rachel say to you last night when we stopped by?" Hiram inquired as he followed the woman through the house, hot on her heels.

Shelby stopped dead in her tracks and turned around abruptly.

"What are you talking about? I didn't see Rachel last night."

"What are _you_ talking about? Yes you did," Hiram insisted, his irritation growing at how unhelpful the woman was being. "We stopped by around 8:00 on our way home to drop off a copy of the custody arrangement. Rachel let herself in cause she wanted to see you. She said she talked to you."

"Around 8:00? No she didn't," Shelby responded, shaking her head in confusion. "I was home but I definitely didn't see her. I think I might've been on a call then? I haven't even seen the custody papers anywhere. And I haven't seen Rachel since Saturday."

"Well, she said she talked to you and I literally watched her walk into the house. She was in here for maybe less than ten minutes?"

"I—I don't know. Why wouldn't she come see me?" Shelby all-but whispered, a mixture of fright and dread coloring her expression.

"I have no idea," Hiram sniped. "I don't know what's going on with her, but can we get back to calling her friends. Maybe she's with Quinn? And she didn't say anything to you during your call before bed last night either?"

"No," Shelby froze and pure guilt scratched at her throat. "I was so distracted with trying to wrap up things for VA last night. It was really late by the time I finished and figured she was already asleep."

"Great," Hiram retorted and ran his hand through his hair in frustration. "Just great, Shelby. What is even going on with you this week? Do you not have time for your daughter anymore?"

"Hey, absolutely not. You do not get to do that," Shelby replied with a fierce bark in her voice and shook her head defensively. "I get that you're worried about Rachel and I am too, but you do not get to speak to me that way. We are not going to fall apart now, not when we have to find our daughter."

Hiram took a steadying breath and nodded remorsefully. He knew that he needed to subdue his temper. He was being unfair.

"Sorry," the father said apologetically. "I'm sorry, Shelby. You're right. Let's just find Rachel."

* * *

 _Wednesday, the night before, 8:00 p.m., Rachel_

Walking up to the front door of her mother's house, Rachel deliberated for a few moments. She briefly thought about knocking but then pulled out her keys instead to let herself in. Shelby had insisted that Rachel can come there whenever she wanted or needed.

She hastily unlocked the door and stepped into the inviting warmth. She wiped her shoes on the doormat languidly and listened for movement in the house. Hearing nothing but silence, she decided to make her way to the kitchen.

"Mom?" Rachel called out quietly.

She doesn't know why she was being so timid. But she felt nervous for some reason. She hasn't seen her mom in a few days and it was the longest that they'd been apart for a while. It was weird. And it made her feel uneasy. On top of everything she was already feeling that week.

Shelby vaguely explained to her that things had come up and that she needed to work extra hours, so she could be free for the holiday weekend and can just focus on spending it with her and their family. Rachel understood but she was taken aback by how unavailable her mom has been. She wasn't trying to be needy, but the closer it got Thanksgiving, the more anxious she became.

Rachel felt unprepared. Wholly unprepared.

Her parents informed her that she would be spending the afternoon celebrating with Hiram and his family and the evening with Shelby and her family. It would be the first time that Rachel would be meeting her mom's entire family. And the whole day would be the first holiday that she'd spent apart from Leroy.

Overwhelmed wasn't an appropriate enough term to describe the onslaught of conflicting emotions that was building inside of her.

She couldn't talk to her dad about it because he seemed hell-bent on moving on and he was better than she was at pretending like everything was normal. She halfheartedly tried talking about it with Quinn, but the blonde seemed more absorbed with her current feud with her sister than anything else. Her first choice would've been her mom. But Shelby had practically gone MIA. Rachel was hoping for some face-time tonight and needed her mom to talk her off the ledge.

Rachel scrunched her brows together when she walked into the empty kitchen. She found an abandoned plate of food on the counter and deduced that it was recently warmed up. Continuing her search, she stuck her head out of the adjacent hallway and saw the light on in her mother's study. She also heard the faint sound of her speaking past the half-closed door.

"Mom? It's me," Rachel called out again, a little louder this time. She walked down the hallway and waited for Shelby to acknowledge her. She paused right outside the door when she didn't get a response and peered into the study.

She raised her fist to knock but hesitated once she heard her mom talk into her phone.

"I'm sorry, Marty. I don't know what to tell you," Shelby said while she massaged the kinks out of her neck with her free hand. "I haven't had any time. I've been on-the-go this week and I just feel like my feet haven't touched the ground."

Rachel frowned at the distress evident in her mom's voice but didn't make another move to allow her presence be known. Shelby was absentmindedly walking around the office space and stopped to look out the window, her back turned towards the door.

"No, I haven't read it. And I'm not going to read it," Shelby replied to her long-time manager proposing new projects on the other line. "You know I can't go back to New York now. I absolutely can't. Not when I have Rachel."

Shelby let out a long sigh in annoyance. This wasn't her first conversation with the man about this. She's already made it clear that her only priority right now was her daughter, despite the incredibly compelling offers being thrown her way recently. It wasn't the right time for her to return to Broadway. She would never entertain the idea of moving away from Rachel now.

Out in the hallway, Rachel predictably and unfortunately mistook Shelby's annoyance with Marty for frustration with her. _Was she keeping her mom from New York and from what she really wanted?_ Shelby had said can't. Not that she didn't want to. There was a difference to the girl.

Her uneasiness instantly doubled and she walked away dejectedly, no longer having the desire to speak with her mom. Clearly, she was preoccupied.

Rachel stormed out of the house before she could change her mind and stuffed the purpose of the visit in the mailbox on her way back to the car.

Later that night, Rachel called her mom a few times as she struggled to control her growing anxiety. She even stayed up patiently, hoping that she'd at least continue to honor their bedtime calls. Shelby never did.

* * *

 _Thursday, 9:30 a.m., Rachel_

Rachel doesn't know how long or how far she ran.

All she focused on was the feeling of the air on her skin, the breath going in and out of her lungs, her muscles contracting, and her heart beating in her chest. She wasn't even the slightest bit aware of anything else as the world around her blurred by.

Eventually, Rachel gave in. It all became too much for the young girl and she unwillingly sank down to the sidewalk; her legs not able to support her anymore. She put her face in her hands and relinquished control. She surrendered to the anger, frustration, sadness, and confusion over the recent unending and drastic changes in her life. Rachel gave vent to her feelings with no more reservations as heavy sobs wracked through her small frame.

At some point, she moved the few feet to a nearby bench and sat down, unable to move as her raging emotions continued to batter her against the proverbial rocks.

* * *

 _Thursday, 9:45 a.m., Robert_

Robert Corcoran had only two jobs on Thanksgiving mornings. He was to one, pick up last-minute random groceries that Anne needed for their family gathering and two, steer clear of his wife's kitchen.

He was on phase two of his annual duties when he froze in his tracks catching a glimpse of a young brunette sitting on a bench a few yards in front of him. He was on his way home from the grocery store and decided to take a leisurely walk through the park. Unlike the women in his life, Robert loved the outdoors and took every advantage he could to enjoy nature and the fresh air. It was a relaxing jaunt so far but the moment he saw his granddaughter, his heart rate picked up significantly. He could never mistake Rachel for anyone else. She was the consummate carbon copy of his oldest daughter.

Robert tightened his grip on the grocery bag in his hand and walked over to the girl cautiously. His palms began to sweat taking in Rachel's noticeably bothered appearance and his frown deepened realizing that the young girl was crying. He looked around half-expecting to see his daughter, but his worry intensified realizing that Rachel was all alone. Unsure of what to do next but equally uneager to leave the clearly troubled teenager by herself, he walked up to the bench carefully.

"Ra—are you okay?" He asked apprehensively. Robert was uncertain of whether or not he should introduce himself. They weren't due to meet until later on in the day. In fact, he couldn't sleep last night because of the excitement. But he was definitely ill-prepared for the current state that his grandchild was in.

"I'm—is everything alright?" He asked softly. He stood awkwardly a couple feet in front of her. Obviously Rachel was upset and the last thing he wanted to do was crowd her or scare her off

After what felt like the longest few seconds of his life, Rachel finally looked up and the amount of hurt prominent across her features literally took Robert's breath away. He had to mentally restrain himself from pulling his granddaughter into his arms. She reminded him too much of a certain emotional little girl that he used to spend hours comforting.

Finally starting to be aware of her surroundings and of the stranger looking over at her, Rachel nodded her head. She sniffled loudly and wiped the remnants of her breakdown off her face with the sleeve of her shirt. Robert grimaced slightly at the action and pulled his handkerchief out of his back pocket to offer to the girl.

Rachel looked at it and then up at him questioningly. Robert offered her a kind smile and extended it closer to her. The teenager tentatively accepted and blew her nose hard, extremely embarrassed by her very public meltdown.

"Thank you," Rachel hiccuped sadly as her crying thankfully began to slow down. She inhaled deeply and tried to control her ragged breathing. "I'm okay."

"Can I—do you mind if I sit down?"

Rachel glanced at the empty spot next to her. She didn't exactly feel like talking to a complete stranger right now, but she had just contaminated his once-pristine handkerchief. She narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously and quickly examined him. The tall and slender old man had an NYU baseball cap on and was holding a brown bag full of groceries. He gave her a small smile once she made eye contact, completely aware that she was sizing him up. She looked into his soft and caring green eyes that reminded her of someone else's, but couldn't exactly place whose at the moment. He seemed unthreatening enough. She nodded in agreement.

Thrilled, Robert set the groceries down between them and sat down on the bench. He wiped his hands on his knees and snuck a peek at his grandchild, concern growing once again when he realized that she was only wearing shorts and a long sleeved t-shirt. He instantly moved to take his jacket off.

"Are you cold? How long have you been outside?" He inquired as he volunteered his jacket to her.

"I—I don't know. I'm just out for a run," Rachel furrowed her eyebrows, beyond confused by the man's actions.

"I insist," Robert assured. He mimicked his movements with the handkerchief exchange earlier and Rachel, who was slowly starting to feel the effects of being out in bitter cold for hours, once again reluctantly accepted.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" Rachel asked quietly as she wrapped herself up in the man's jacket that was three sizes too big for her.

Robert peered at Rachel again and thought briefly for a moment on how to approach this. He swallowed nervously and then cleared his throat.

"I have two daughters," he replied, his tone gentle. "And if either of them were at a park all alone and crying, I would want someone to stop and make sure that they were okay."

Rachel didn't respond and the silence broke Robert's heart even more.

"Are you okay?" The grandfather prompted.

"I don't know."

"How come?"

"I don't know," the teenager repeated and sighed heavily.

Rachel wasn't lying when she said that, in her eyes, her life was perfect before her dads got divorced. It was wonderful, and she's overcome with sadness every time she thinks about how it all ended. At the same time, all of those feelings were wrapped up with the happiness and joy she felt about finally having her mom in her life. It was all so confusing for her, and she didn't even have words to properly describe everything she felt. Recently, she was so consumed with the idea that if her dads hadn't got divorced, then she wouldn't have her mom. That thought has done nothing but fill her with unadulterated guilt. She hated that one had to happen for her to have the other. And above all that, Rachel just wanted her mom to tell her that it was all okay, but Shelby didn't seem to care.

"I just feel like I'm being pushed and pulled in all of these different directions," Rachel responded honestly. "There's been a lot of changes in my life."

Robert nodded thoughtfully in understanding.

"Bad changes?"

"And good, I guess," the young girl shrugged and blew her nose again. "Just a lot. And it's kinda overwhelming."

"Have you talked to your parents about what you're feeling?"

"A little, but it's hard. I don't know, it's—complicated? They're all going through a lot too."

"I'm certain though that whatever you are feeling is more important to them."

"I'm not so sure about that," Rachel said dismally, thinking about how ignored she felt by her mom.

"Do your parents know where you are?" Robert investigated, the thought just occurred to him.

"Uh—no," said Rachel, her posture stiffening as she realized how much trouble she going to be in. She must've been gone for a while. "Do you know what time it is?"

"It's almost 10:00," Robert answered after glancing at his watch. Rachel's eyes widened at the response.

"They're going to kill me," the teenager whispered to herself.

Recognizing the panic beginning to brew inside of the young girl, Robert tentatively reached out and placed his hand on Rachel's forearm, as if he was reminding her to stay with him in this moment.

"Everything will be alright," Robert promised his granddaughter once he captured her attention. "I know what you mean. I understand that feeling of when it seems like everything is out of your control. I understand feeling like you're in over your head. I agree. It is overwhelming. And it is more than okay to feel that way. It does not make you weak. There is nothing wrong with it. But, young lady, take it from an old man, I guarantee you that in the end, everything will be okay. Maybe not today, or tomorrow, but _eventually_ , it will all be okay."

"How do you know?" The girl couldn't help but ask, insecurity and emotions raw in her voice.

"Because your mom, dads, and I will make sure of it, Rachel," Robert answered truthfully.

Rachel whipped her head to face him, her eyes wild with shock as recognition slowly but surely sunk in.

"Hi sweetheart," the old man smiled kindly while he grabbed her hand and gave it a comforting squeeze. "I'm Robert, I'm your grandpa."

* * *

 _Thursday, 10:00 a.m., Shelby_

 _"_ Yes Kim, I'll let you know as soon as we find her. Thanks," Shelby replied and hung up, slamming her phone down on the table in frustration. She looked up at Hiram hopefully and he shook his head no as he wrapped up his call with his ex husband.

Shelby sighed and rubbed her temples, trying to alleviate the pressure headache she felt coming on. Earlier, the uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach grew exponentially when she found her cell phone and noticed that her daughter had called her three times the night before. _How could she have missed it? Not just one but all three of her calls?_ She automatically felt like the worst mother in the entire universe. There were no words for how bad she felt.

"I think Leroy's _this_ close to getting on a plane," Hiram said, pinching the air between his thumb and index finger together.

Shelby nodded distractedly and tried to gather her thoughts. She _needed_ to find her kid.

"What does Rachel do when she's upset?" Shelby questioned the man who raised her child.

"Storm off, sulk, sing, dance, apparently run away," Hiram listed as he paced in front of her office desk.

"Does she usually like to be alone or with other people?"

"I don't know. Maybe both?"

"Okay well—" The loud ringing of Shelby's cell phone cut her off and she didn't waste a second picking it up. Hiram stopped his pacing immediately and watched Shelby answer the call.

"Dad?" Shelby replied to the other line, a puzzled look taking over her entire face "I don't—what? She's with you? Is she okay? Where was she?" She spouted out rapidly.

"Rachel's okay?" Hiram mouthed. Shelby nodded in confirmation and the father let out a breath he felt like he's been holding for hours. He plopped down on the chair behind him at the sudden expulsion of all his worry.

"Are you sure she's alright?" Shelby asked again, needing concrete affirmation that her child was safe and sound. "Okay. Yes. Thanks, dad. We'll see you there."

Shelby set her phone down and in an instant, felt an intense flood of emotions rapidly hit her, relief bubbling to the top. She felt her knees buckle slightly and she grabbed the edge of the desk with a vice-like grip in order to steady herself. The woman dropped her head and released a shaky breath.

"Shelby?" Hiram called out with concern.

Shelby shook her head furiously as tears of guilt and regret welled up her green eyes. She blinked them back fiercely and forced herself to keep it together.

"Um—my dad said he ran into her at the park. He said she's a bit shaken up? But that they are going to walk over to my parent's together to pick up his car and he'll drop her off at your house," she relayed the information. Shelby hesitated for a few more moments but finally looked up with a pained expression written across her face, unshed tears hanging from her long lashes as her bottom lip trembled. "She's okay. But Hiram, I—I think I messed up."

* * *

 _Thursday, 10:30 a.m., Rachel_

Rachel sat in the passenger seat of her grandpa's car, still in complete shock at the turn of events. She had her hands clasped tightly on her lap but only to stop them from shaking. The anxiety was rearing its ugly head again. It wasn't the unexpected meeting with her grandpa that was making her nervous. It was the thought of dealing with her parents at the end of the car ride.

She didn't mean to run away or disappear. Not on purpose.

She didn't know what to expect next. She was still operating on emotional overdrive. Truthfully, she was a little more than afraid of what her parents' reactions were going to be. Her mind whirling, she didn't realize that her grandpa had pulled up to the curb outside of her dad's house.

Robert gave the girl a few more seconds to herself. She'd been living in her head since they left the park and he thought giving her space was the best course of action. His number one priority right now was getting the missing teenager back to her worried parents.

"Rachel?"

"I'm scared," the teen confessed, making eye contact with her grandfather.

"Oh Rachel, everything will be alright," Robert said convincingly. "I meant what I said earlier. I know you're going through a lot, but I also know that everything will work out. Your mom and your dads love you. You'll all get through this together. And I know we just met, but I'm always here for you too. I promise you that."

Her grandpa's tone was gentle and understanding, not judging or pushy. And it made Rachel feel like he was telling her the truth. The way he looked at her, she had no option but to believe him.

"Thank you—grandpa," Rachel said, testing the label. She liked it.

Robert beamed in response, his heart feeling full. He could get used to that.

"Anytime, Rachel," he promised. "You'll be okay. I know it. You are a Corcoran after all."

Rachel looked at him in surprise and couldn't help but smile at the acknowledgement. However, her face fell just as quickly watching her mom's Range Rover pull up in the driveway.

"You won't let them kill me?" Rachel asked with hope, intently watching her mom and dad get out of the car.

"I will try my best," Robert chuckled, not making any promises knowing his daughter. "But you, young lady, have to promise me that you won't run away anymore. Even accidentally. You worried a lot of people this morning."

"Sorry," Rachel apologized meekly. "I didn't mean to."

"I know, sweetheart," Robert said empathetically. "Now this is the hard part, but you've got this. Saying you're sorry, staying calm, and being honest will go a long way, just remember that."

* * *

 _Thursday_ , _10:45 a.m., Shelby_

Shelby's stomach flipped maybe a dozen times waiting for Rachel to get out of her father's car. Hiram was still talking about all the ways he was going to punish their daughter for this transgression, but Shelby tuned him out a while ago, preoccupied with her growing feelings of intense guilt.

She watched Rachel open the car door and share look with Robert who gave her an encouraging nod. The mother felt another pang of guilt flow through her noticing how weary her daughter looked as she got out of the car.

Shelby stood up straighter and squared her shoulders as Rachel approached them. She made the first move and stepped forward to pull her daughter into her arms but Rachel took one look at her with betrayed eyes and walked over to Hiram instead.

Shelby's heart instantly shattered into a million pieces. Not that she ever wanted Rachel to play favorites, but the rejection hurt her in ways she didn't believe was possible.

"You have no idea how much trouble you're in Rachel Barbra," the father said as he gathered up his only child into a fierce hug. He held her tightly and shot Shelby an apologetic look. He had seen their daughter's clear rebuff of her. Shelby shook her head and waved it off.

"What were you thinking, Rachel?" The man demanded a moment right after she pulled away.

"I'm sorry, I lost track of time," the teenager replied, dropping her gaze. "I don't know I—"

"The rules are there for a reason," Hiram cut her off, his relief rapidly turning into anger now that he had physical proof that his child was safe. "You were missing for _hours_ , Rachel! That is not okay. This is precisely why I tell you to bring your phone or leave a note. Anything could've happened. We had no idea where to you find you. Were you even thinking? Were you—"

"Hey Hiram," Robert interjected as he walked up behind the man and placed a calming hand on his shoulder. "I'm not trying to overstep, but I think Rachel's had a long morning. How about we let her warm up first? And I think it might be better if you all take this discussion inside?"

Hiram stopped and scrutinized his daughter for the first time and sighed taking in her worn out appearance. He peeked at Shelby who seemed frozen in place.

"Fine," he agreed. He took his cell phone out of his pocket and handed it to the young girl. "Go inside and call your daddy, Rach. He's worried sick about you."

Rachel nodded remorsefully and took the phone in her hand. She started to move to take her grandpa's jacket off.

"Keep it on," Robert insisted and winked at his granddaughter. "It looks better on you anyway."

Rachel allowed a small smile to grace her lips and unexpectedly flung herself into her grandpa's arms.

"Everything will be okay," Robert whispered into her ear as he accepted the embrace, savoring in the physical affection from his oldest grandchild. "And I hope I see you soon, Rachel. Whenever you're ready."

"See you soon, grandpa," Rachel whispered back and then promptly turned on her heel and walked away, still refusing to acknowledge her mother.

The slight slam of the front door thrusted Shelby back into the moment. She blinked hard and drew her attention back to the two men in front of her.

"Thanks for bringing her back here, Robert," Hiram said, shaking the older man's hand. "It was lucky she ran into you."

"She was crying earlier. She said she's feeling overwhelmed by all the changes. If you ask me, I think the anxiety about today triggered her. I suggest you talk to her about that," Robert spoke firmly as he shared his information with the two parents. He made sure to keep his eye contact with his daughter, who looked more and more pained at every word.

"Okay," Hiram nodded solemnly. "Thanks again, Robert. It was good seeing you. Wish it were under better circumstances, but perhaps we can all have dinner together sometime soon?"

Robert agreed and shook the man's hand again. As soon as Hiram disappeared into the house, he turned to Shelby who had yet to speak a word. He sighed and pulled his daughter into his arms.

Shelby immediately melted into her father's embrace and let the familiar comfort sweep away some of her overflowing hurt.

"Daddy, I missed her calls," Shelby said, mentally wincing when her voice cracked. "I don't—I missed it all."

Robert gently pried Shelby off so he can look into her eyes, almost identical to his, that bore nothing but pure regret.

"Shelly, what were you even doing this week that had you so preoccupied?" Robert questioned without rancor. "My granddaughter made it sound like you practically abandoned her."

"Work," Shelby admitted and ran her hand through her wild hair in frustration. "Over the weekend, my boss Tim told me that if VA impressed at our Holiday Showcase, then he'd convince the Booster Club to make room in the budget for me to be able to hire an assistant coach. Having an assistant coach means having more time for Rachel. The Showcase is in a week, and I figured that if I put in all the legwork now, then I can just focus on Rachel this weekend. I didn't know that she was feeling so stressed out. I didn't realize. I'm not used to balancing roles like this, dad. And even Tim said that I've been distracted recently and I guess I also took that as a personal attack. I've worked so hard to turn VA into what we are now, and I got defensive and felt like I needed to protect what I built and prove to him that I could still deliver. But I did that at Rachel's expense. And I feel so horrible about it. I'm messing everything up."

Robert just stared at his daughter, thoroughly impressed that she was able to confess all of that without pausing for a single breath, a skill that he's going to attribute to her years of Broadway training.

"I see," he said in understanding, pieces of the puzzle starting to come together. "Well, you're not messing _everything_ up. But you did mess this up."

Shelby felt her heart drop. She already hated herself at the moment, but disappointing her dad was just the icing on the cake.

Robert could literally feel rather than see his child's distress. He sighed again realizing that giving her encouragement would serve her better than reprimanding his oldest daughter. He shifted gears and softened his entire stance.

"Shelly-Bean, please listen to me," he implored as he gently lifted his daughter's chin up so they could make eye contact, he really needed her to hear this. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. I meant to say that you're a good mother. And I know this because I know you're trying. I also know you must be under a tremendous amount of pressure, so it's not a surprise that this happened. But this was just an unintended mistake. I know it's tough for you to swallow sometimes, but you're not perfect Shel. And nobody expects you to be. Messing up is a huge part of being a parent. We make mistakes too, you know this. And we're certainly allowed to from time to time. It's what we do with the mistakes and after that counts."

"She wouldn't even look at me dad," Shelby said brokenly as the guilt gnawed at her insides.

"Tell Rachel that you love her and apologize," Robert continued. "Let her know that you're trying and that you're doing your best but that you're also adjusting. These are big changes for you too, and she'll understand that. You'll get through this. Just be sincere and honest. And I know I don't have to remind you to do and be better for your daughter moving forward. I am always so proud of you, of everything you've accomplished, of how hard you work, but you're also a mother now, Shelby. Rachel must come first."

Shelby nodded in acknowledgement at her father's words, her eyes glazed with tears. He was right. She had the very fresh and stinging memory of Rachel's dismissal of her burning a guilty hole into her heart to deter her from making this mistake again.

"Don't be so hard on yourself," Robert said, reading his daughter well. "You just stumbled this time, but it's nothing you can't recover from. Rachel loves you. And you've got good instincts. Just go in there, listen, and help her through this as best as you can."

Shelby soaked up more of her dad's wisdom and guidance before saying goodbye. Opening the door slowly, she reluctantly steeled her resolve and carried on. She needed to fix things between her and her kid.

* * *

Shelby doesn't know how everything went from bad to worse in a matter of minutes. But it had.

The moment she walked into the kitchen, she almost choked on the tension in the room.

Father and daughter were standing across the island glaring daggers at one another, both looked like they were mentally preparing to wage war.

"What's going on in here?" Shelby inquired, approaching the situation cautiously. She stood at the far end of the long countertop in between the pair.

"Rachel Barbra Berry, you are on thin ice," Hiram seethed. "I _said_ go up to your room right now and get ready."

"No!" Rachel spat back. "And like I _told_ you I'm not going anywhere!"

All in one swift motion, Hiram rolled his head and cracked his neck then pinched the bridge of his nose.

"This is the last time I am asking you, Rachel," Hiram said in a dangerously low and serious voice. "Please go upstairs, take a shower, and get ready. Be down here and ready to go to your uncle's in exactly one hour _or else."_

Shelby looked at Hiram in complete disbelief. He couldn't possibly be telling their daughter to get ready to carry on with her day as if nothing just happened.

"No. I don't want to go," Rachel countered back in contempt. She got an obstinate look in her face and crossed her arms.

"Hiram, I don't think—" Shelby tried to intervene.

"I'm sorry princess, but you don't have a choice," Hiram replied calmly, ignoring Shelby.

" _Don't_ call me that!" The teenager barked and shook her head viciously. " _Only_ daddy gets to call me that, and you can't because you pushed him away and you ruined everything!"

Shelby winced, surprised at the amount of venom in Rachel's voice. She glanced at Hiram who looked completely stricken.

"Rachel—" Hiram lowered his voice.

"No. I _hate_ you!" Rachel yelled. She practically threw her half empty glass of water in the sink, and Shelby was surprised that it didn't shatter. The teen stormed out of the room and left two utterly speechless adults in the room.

"Hiram—"

"I'm going up there to talk to her. She can't speak to me that way," the father remarked, his expression full of shock.

"She didn't mean it," Shelby replied instantly, attempting to diffuse the situation. "She's just overwhelmed. Let's just give her space."

"No, absolutely not," Hiram moved to follow his daughter but Shelby reacted faster and cut him off at the door. "Please move."

"You can't go up there," Shelby said sternly. "You have to calm down first. You both aren't thinking clearly right now. You need to give her some time."

"Shelby, move. That was not okay. I get that Rachel is upset, but she cannot go and disrespect me like that."

"And we will discuss that later, but right now, Rachel is not in any state for us to be disciplining her. She is not okay, why can't you see that?"

"Oh, just like how you saw how upset she was all week? Cause you're definitely mother of the year. Move, Shelby. And don't tell me what to do with my daughter."

Shelby felt all the air whoosh out of her lungs as she absorbed what Hiram just said. She reeled back as if she had just been struck. She couldn't hide the surprise. And Hiram himself couldn't even believe what he just said.

" _Your_ daughter?" She choked out.

"Shelby, I am so sorry, I didn't mean that," Hiram apologized immediately.

Shelby raised her hand to cut him off and shook her head imperceptibly. Breathing deeply, she tried to get herself under control, but felt like she was close to losing it. She glanced up at the stairs and let out a sigh of relief noticing Rachel's closed door.

Without thinking, Shelby spun on her heel and walked out the front door. Unsure of what else to do, Hiram sorrowfully followed the woman outside and closed the door behind him.

"I'm so sorry, Shelbs," Hiram began to apologize again. He felt terrible. His temper always got the best of him.

Shelby paced anxiously, trying to fight the torrent of emotions assaulting her right now, and losing. After a few moments, she stopped and stared at Hiram as seriously as he's ever seen her.

"We have a little girl up there who's having panic attacks and running away because of decisions that _we_ all made 14 years ago, so don't you _dare_ blame this on me," Shelby finally snapped. She wasn't yelling, but she wasn't fully composed either. "Hiram. You're a great father. I know you are. Rachel thinks the world of you and Leroy, but how could you both miss this? I know our reunion hasn't been a walk in the park and I know that I dropped the ball this week. Believe me, I know. But this—whatever is happening with our baby—is deep-rooted. This is something that's been building up for months. That you missed. That we missed. And we have to fix it. We _need_ to fix it, because I will no longer tolerate seeing my child this unhappy. Do you understand me, Hiram? So please, or so help me God, _please_ put away your pride and work with me to help our daughter."

"Okay," Hiram said as he felt all the anger drain out of him. Shelby's tone left no room for argument and he knew that he had also messed this up for his daughter. "You're right. We'll fix this. We'll talk to Rachel. We can get her some help. Maybe someone to talk to? We'll figure it out."

"Together," Shelby added sternly.

"Together," Hiram confirmed.

* * *

Shelby made her way up to Rachel's room a few minutes later, leaving Hiram downstairs to collect himself. She needed to focus right now on her daughter.

As soon as she got to the closed door, she knocked on it gently.

"Go away!" Rachel shouted from inside the room.

"Rach? It's mom," Shelby replied. "May I please come in?"

Shelby held her breath waiting for Rachel to respond. After a few seconds of silence, she made a split second decision to open the door and let herself in, thanking God that it was unlocked.

Her heart broke finding her child sitting on her bed hugging her knees and softly crying. Shelby moved to sit in front of her and placed a comforting hand on her arm.

"What can I do, Rach?" Shelby asked desperately. "How can I help?"

Rachel shook her head, still refusing to look up and recoiled away from her mother's touch. She didn't want any of her comfort right now.

"Leave me alone," Rachel mumbled.

"Baby, please don't shut me out," Shelby begged, her voice thick with emotion. She couldn't bear the thought of Rachel not talking to her right now.

Deep brown eyes looked up a moment later, hurt and full of pain.

"You promised me," Rachel said, her tone more muted and flat than Shelby has ever heard. "You said you'd always be here for me, you said that I come first."

"I'm _so_ sorry, Rachel," Shelby apologized with her entire heart. "I should have never put work before you this week. I wasn't thinking and I—this is hard for me too. I'm still learning how to be a mom, and I know I haven't been a very good one lately. But I am so sorry. I never meant to make you feel like you weren't important to me. You matter _the_ _most_ and I promise to never forget that."

Rachel looked at her mom and couldn't mistake the unadulterated look of regret for anything else. She heard her and she believed her, which made her more angry and confused than anything else.

The mother could see a whole conversation going on in her daughter's head but she was apparently not willing to voice her thoughts, and that hurt Shelby more than anything else. She had worked so hard to slowly build Rachel's trust, and it seemed like they were back to square one. She mentally berated herself again at the lack of response. She only had herself to blame.

"Baby," Shelby tried again, this time moving to pull her daughter in for a hug. Rachel wasn't having it and pushed Shelby off a little more forcibly than she had intended. The power of the shove forced Shelby up to her feet.

Looking at her mom's startled expression, Rachel felt another dam inside of her crumble and a flood of tears automatically streamed down her face. She couldn't think clearly now if she tried. She shook her head, her vision blurring rapidly.

"Don't call me that," Rachel sobbed. "I'm not your baby. You gave me away. You didn't want me."

Shelby froze at Rachel's pronouncement. She felt every single nerve inside of her scream out in pain. Speechless, she opened her mouth to respond but nothing came out. The silence between them thickened and Rachel's crying intensified in a way she didn't believe was possible.

Rooted to her spot, she stared at her child helplessly. Once she heard Rachel's breathing start to turn panicked, she jumped into action. She hesitated and glanced at her kid one more time before turning around and making her way to Rachel's bathroom.

Shelby began opening drawers and cabinets frantically before she found what she was looking for. Spraying the multipurpose cleaner with a determined purpose, she began cleaning the bathtub in haste. Scrubbing hard until she was satisfied, she turned the faucet on with a shaky hand and began drawing her daughter a bath.

She made her way back to the other room and sighed at the sight of Rachel, who seemed paralyzed apart from the jagged crying. She walked over to her child and ignored the way Rachel flinched as she approached.

Shelby crouched down so she could be eye level with her daughter and tentatively reached out to brush Rachel's unkempt hair out of her face. She grabbed her chin gently and tilted her head to force her to make eye contact.

"I love you, Rachel," Shelby said, giving her a soft smile. "I love you so much and I know that even if you don't want me right now that you still need me, and that's why I'm not going anywhere. Not now, not ever."

Before she could respond, Shelby pulled her up to her feet and grabbed her hand. She squeezed it tightly, trying to pour all her love to her broken daughter.

Shelby led her into the en suite and guided her to front of the bathtub. Still crying quietly, Rachel only looked at her mom with confusion.

"I need you to calm down, Rach. You need to relax before you work yourself up again. Can I help you do that?"

Rachel examined the bathtub that was almost full of warm water and nodded. Shelby released a sigh of relief and tested the water first before shutting off the faucet.

"Lift your arms up for me ba—Rachel," Shelby urged. The young girl furrowed her brows and blushed red at the suggestion.

"It's nothing I haven't seen before Rach," Shelby said in understanding. She began wiping her tears off with the pads of her thumbs, absolutely sick of seeing her child weep. "I just want to help."

Rachel gingerly lifted her arms and Shelby made a quick work of helping her undress. She slowly guided her child into the bathtub and began helping her wash up.

Outside, Shelby appeared calm and collected; but inside, she was falling apart just as fast as Rachel's tears were falling. She _hated_ seeing her daughter this way. It filled her with a sadness that she's never experienced before.

Shelby took her time washing her child up delicately, trying her best to help her relax. At some point, she began to hum a random melody softly, needing to fill the silence with anything else but Rachel's cries. She dropped some shampoo in her hands and started to massage it into the young girl's hair, gently scratching her scalp in a soothing manner. Shelby smiled to herself noticing Rachel close her eyes and begin to relax at her touch. After a few minutes, Shelby got up from her spot at the edge of the tub and broke the silence.

"I'm going to get some clothes for you, are you okay to finish up here?" Shelby asked.

Rachel opened her eyes and turned her head to face her mom. Shelby smiled again realizing that the tears had finally stopped. Remaining silent, the teenager only nodded.

"Okay love, I will be right back," The mother promised as she walked out of the bathroom.

Rachel used the moment of privacy to regroup. The only emotion that she could register right now was sheer exhaustion. She submerged herself underwater very briefly and took solace in the quietness it brought. Bringing her head above water, she inhaled deeply until she felt her lungs burn, and exhaled slowly, allowing some calm to enter her body for the first time since she woke up that morning. She massaged her muscles tenderly knowing that she was going to be extremely sore the next day. A knock on the door and her mother's voice interrupted her a few moments later.

Rachel stood up carefully, testing her balance, and accepted her mom's hand to use as support to get out of the tub.

Shelby wrapped her daughter up in a large towel and began to dry her off with as much attention as possible. Rachel just stood there allowing Shelby to care for her, too tired to fight it. Once she was done, Shelby looked into her daughter's reddened eyes and leaned over and kissed her forehead before she could think twice about it. Her lips lingered realizing that Rachel hadn't pulled away that time.

"I'll let you get changed," The mother decided. She picked up the hairbrush by the sink before walking out. "But I'll help brush your hair whenever you're ready."

Shelby patiently sat the edge of Rachel's bed for a little while, not permitting herself to think about anything or feel anything. She couldn't lean into any of that until Rachel was okay. She fidgeted with the hairbrush in her hand until Rachel opened the bathroom door and walked over to her shyly.

"Feel a little bit better?" Shelby questioned the still silent teenager.

Rachel nodded and shifted anxiously on her feet. Shelby detested how nervous her child was again around her.

"Good, come sit," Shelby patted the spot on the bed in front of her. Rachel sat down and turned her back to her mom. Shelby began to brush Rachel's long brown tangles until she could brush through it effortlessly. She repeated her motions slowly and gently and watched Rachel's entire body soften.

"Can I braid your hair, Rach?" Shelby asked, continuing to brush.

Rachel nodded again and Shelby grinned at the positive answer. She spent the next few minutes expertly braiding her daughter's hair, years of being a big sister to Kim coming in handy.

"There you have it," Shelby said, tying Rachel's hair as she finished. She was about to move but Rachel settled back and leaned her body against Shelby's chest.

"Rach?" Shelby's heart was racing, totally surprised by the action. A few moments of silence passed and the mother waited for Rachel to respond with bated breath.

"I'm not ready," Rachel whispered and then relaxed into her mom's arms, subconsciously craving her comfort more than she realized.

"Ready for what, love?" Shelby inquired, a bit afraid of the answer.

"To meet your family. For Thanksgiving without daddy," Rachel confessed. "I'm not ready. I'm sorry, mom."

"Okay," Shelby said simply with total acceptance.

Rachel turned slightly and looked up at her mom in confusion.

"You're—you're not mad?"

"No, Rach. If you say you're not ready, then you're not ready," Shelby replied truthfully. "I'm not mad. And neither is your dad," she added.

Rachel turned back around and nodded her head thoughtfully.

"We can do something else today," Shelby began to suggest but paused when she heard a knock on the door.

"Rachel?" Hiram called out from the hallway.

Shelby felt Rachel stiffen in her arms and hesitate before responding.

"Come in," the girl agreed after a few seconds.

Hiram walked in guardedly. Also fresh from his own shower, he had a towel draped over his shoulder. He came straight to Rachel's room as soon as he finished, desperately needing to apologize to his daughter and her mother.

"I can be a real jerk, huh?" Hiram said, looking sincerely at Rachel first and then at Shelby. "I am so sorry."

"It's okay," Rachel said, leaning over and taking Hiram's hand in her own. She doesn't want to fight anymore. "I'm sorry too, dad."

Hiram glanced at Shelby and the woman nodded and mouthed the same thing. He brought his daughter's hand up to his lips and kissed it gratefully.

"How about you guys come down whenever you're ready? I bought another box of Fruit Loops yesterday, so we're still feasting today."

Rachel let out a small laugh and Hiram and Shelby both looked at each other and smiled. The man squeezed his daughter's hand one last time before letting it go and making his way out the room.

Rachel let out another sigh, this time of relief, feeling like a little weight has been lifted off her shoulders. She leaned back against her mom.

"Are you sure you're not mad?" Rachel asked again, staring straight ahead of her.

"I'm sure," Shelby answered, kissing her daughter's temple for good measure. "Are you still mad at me?"

Rachel pondered for a moment. She decided to be honest.

"Yeah," Rachel admitted. She was not all ready to forgive her mother yet. "But I still need you."

"Okay," Shelby accepted. She can handle that. That's more than she thought she'd get from her daughter at this point. And she can fix that. She will.

"I love you," she placed another kiss on the back of her kid's head.

"Love you too," Rachel replied.

* * *

 **A** / **N** : **Yikes. Not a lot of Thanksgiving celebrations for Shelby and Rachel, but a million thanks from me for the constantly wonderful reception to this story.**

 **Bear with me, next couple of chapters are going to be a bit rough for mother and daughter. More soon!**


	14. Chapter 14

Space.

Rachel needed space.

It's been more than a week since Thanksgiving, and her parents were still practicing their own version of cruel and unusual punishment. Her dad hasn't let her out of his sight since she came back from her run that morning and her mom was continuing to be unnervingly calm and understanding.

Against _all_ of her protests, they spent the rest of their holiday weekend discussing her breakdown and absolutely everything leading up to it. When the dust settled, they had somehow come to the conclusion that Rachel needed to talk to a therapist to help her deal with all of the changes in her life, an objective adult who can assist with some of her problems. It seemed to her that all three of her parents had given her an ultimatum. She either talked to them or a professional. And Rachel was not comfortable with either.

Still, she promised to mull it over out of fear of being handed another consequence. They hadn't grounded her. Or taken away any privileges—yet, which was the complete opposite of what she was expecting. In fact, everything since then has been relatively normal. Or as normal as it could be.

It was now the following Friday and the entire week that passed by had been ordinary.

Things with her mom had gone back to routine. Her mother was prompt and attentive all week, not even a millisecond late for any of their meetings. However, everything also felt stiff and awkward between them. Their interactions were polite and conversations succinct. Neither one of them were trying to close the obvious rift. Rachel was still unsure of how she felt and Shelby was hesitant to make any other wrong moves. It was a precarious situation and both mother and daughter were unclear on how to move forward.

At the same time, Rachel was also dealing with the fact that although he never doled out an official punishment, her dad seemed to have grounded her.. _to him_. Apart from school and whenever she was with her mom, he spent the entire week keeping her under his watchful eye, scrutinizing her every action.

Rachel was trying to be patient, but the rapt attention was driving her insane. So when the stars aligned and her dad needed to work late Friday evening and her mom unexpectedly and _very_ apologetically canceled their plans, Rachel was a little more than relieved for the space. She needed the free time to be alone and decompress.

* * *

"Stephen Sondheim?" Jesse St. James asked, a hint of amusement in his voice as he plucked the biography from Rachel's hands.

"Yeah," Rachel snatched the book back with a smirk. "Acclaimed Broadway composer. Ever heard of him?"

"Heard of him?" Jesse scoffed. "I often peruse the Sondheim biography section, because I find that only he is able to adequately express my melancholia."

Jesse leaned against the bookshelf then crossed his arms over his chest. He examined the brunette briefly and noticed the exhaustion prominent across her features.

"You're a hard woman to find, Rachel Berry," Jesse said, dropping his arms and giving her a sly grin. "I've been looking for you everywhere."

"Maybe I didn't want to be found," Rachel rolled her eyes. "What do you want, St. James?"

"Why didn't you tell me that Shelby Corcoran is _your_ mother?" Jesse inquired, quickly grabbing Rachel's arm before she could walk away.

"Because it's none of your business," Rachel growled, pulling her arm away, a little more forcibly than she intended. She turned back around and sighed. "This is news to me too. I just found out recently. _And_ I really don't want to talk about it right now, Jesse."

"Alright. I hear ya," the star singer said with his hands up. He gets it. He has his own mommy and daddy issues that he is also equally disinclined to discuss. "I'm just going to say one thing."

He gently grabbed Rachel's shoulders and turned her back around. Placing his hand on the small of her back, he led her to a large window offering a panoramic view of downtown Lima and the surrounding neighborhood.

"You see that, Berry?" Jesse asked rhetorically, moving to stand next to Rachel and staring solemnly straight ahead of him. "All of that— _everything_ the light touches—could be yours.. _If_ you join Vocal Adrenaline and help us win our third consecutive National Championship."

"Oh my god," Rachel groaned and with a powerful force, nudged him with her elbow. "You are such an idiot."

"Oh come on, Rachel!" Jesse exclaimed, roaring with laughter. "You're _Shelby Corcoran's daughter_ , her heir apparent. Just think of what you'd be able to accomplish if you just leave those New Directions Lima losers and come join VA. I know you want to. I can see it in your eyes. You're talented, Rachel. You deserve to be on a team that will recognize that and _appreciate_ that."

Rachel shook her head vehemently and tried to tune out what he was saying. Sure, sometimes she felt like her teammates only tolerated her for what she had to offer, but she also felt like they were really starting to be friends. And she was not at all prepared to entertain the idea of moving to a new school and starting on a new show choir team, especially one that her mother was in charge of, not when she was already struggling with so many other changes.

"Absolutely not," Rachel replied sternly. "I already told you that my allegiance is with New Directions. Besides, I know you're only trying to convince me to jump ship because _you're scared._ Face it, St. James, we're just as good as you guys. Maybe even better because at least we've got heart."

"Oh please," Jesse sneered. "I'll take my two National Championships over your _feelings_. At least I'll be graduating with something to show for it."

"Alright Jesse, whatever helps you sleep at night," Rachel rolled her eyes again. "Just leave me out of it. And what are you doing here bothering me anyway? Does an alarm go off on your phone every time I set foot into the bookstore? And better yet, why aren't you at rehearsal with your team of soulless automatons?"

Jesse smirked watching the irritated girl rant nonstop and glare at him in a manner that was eerily similar to his show choir coach. Rachel Berry sure was something. A kindred spirit of sorts. He knew they were both destined for greatness outside of their small town lives in Ohio.

"First of all, I detest that label. And second, we don't have rehearsal. Your mother canceled practice," Jesse sighed. He was getting a little worried with how lax his coach was becoming with Vocal Adrenaline preparation.

"What, why?"

"I don't know but she also left rehearsal early yesterday," Jesse added sadly. "She actually wasn't at school today, which is strange because I'm pretty sure she's _never_ taken a day off. Shelby's sick right?"

Rachel knit her eyebrows together, confusion flooding her thoughts. Now that she thinks about it, her mother had been noticeably off while she was over on Wednesday, even more than usual, all things considered. And yesterday, she had called her hours before her bedtime to say goodnight, informing her that she was going to sleep early.

Rachel brushed it all off, attributing it to just all the current weirdness between them. Conflicted as she was, concern grew regardless and automatically.

"I don't know?" She pondered, surprised by the information.

"Well, it must be something important though, because Coach C cancels rehearsal for nothing or no one," Jesse shrugged. "I mean, if I'm not mistaken, Section 17, Rule 5 of our Vocal Adrenaline contract does say that no one is allowed to leave rehearsal for any reason whatsoever, including heat exhaustion or Crohn's disease. I _think_."

With a puzzled expression, Rachel just stared at Jesse, unsure of whether or not he's being serious.

"I—what? Never mind," she decided, shaking her head and zipping up her jacket. She looked Jesse dead in his clear blue eyes then placed a firm hand on his shoulder. "Listen, Jesse. I'll cut you a deal. Drive me to my mother's house and I will let you tell me all the reasons why you think I should join VA _without_ complaint."

* * *

On the other side of town, Shelby woke up from a restless sleep in the early evening feeling _terrible_. The absolute worst she's felt physically in recent memory.

Sitting up cautiously, her head felt heavy on her neck, and her arms felt like she had weights attached to them. It felt like she could just shut her eyes and sleep forever despite the fact that she's been sleeping on and off all day and had been in bed since noon.

Her head pounding and stomach churning, she swallowed back nausea. But not even seconds later, she rapidly got out of bed and darted to the bathroom the moment her feet touched the ground.

Flinging herself to the toilet, Shelby's entire body trembled violently every time she leaned over to vomit. Her knees on the floor, she heaved long after there was nothing left to bring up. When she finished, only then did she realize how faint she suddenly felt. She was about to collapse when she felt the cold air hit her back as the bathroom door quickly opened, and in an instant found herself in the warm arms of her daughter.

Reacting purely on adrenaline, Rachel reached up and took the hair tie off of her own hair and quickly gathered up her mom's brunette locks out of her flushed face and bound it all up in a ponytail. Still supporting some of her mother's weight, she reached over, flushed the toilet, and closed the lid. She then pulled a towel off the bar and swiftly folded it into a makeshift pillow.

"Mom, here, lay your head down on the towel. I'll be right back, I promise."

Shelby plopped her head down on the towel and groaned miserably. She felt awful. She was freezing and burning hot at the same time. She couldn't stop her body from shaking. And she's not entirely sure if Rachel was really there or if she was dreaming the entire thing.

She got her answer a moment later when her daughter hastily walked back into the bathroom.

"Mom, can you sit up? Or do you still feel sick?"

It took a few seconds for Rachel's questions to register and it was only when she met her kid's panicked eyes looking down at her did she snap out of the nausea-induced stupor she was in. She waved her hand but made a move to sit up.

Rachel quickly helped Shelby sit up with her back against the bathroom wall. When she was reasonably certain that her mom was not going to fall over if left unattended, she got up and ran a washcloth under cool water.

"Mom, you're burning up. Is it okay if I wipe down your face? It might help you feel better?"

Shelby tried to move her head to nod, but a sharp ache followed her anywhere she turned. She let out a low moan in pain, feeling guilty at the frightened expression it elicited from her daughter. She closed her eyes.

"Just try not to move, mom," she heard Rachel tell her. It sounded far away, like they were speaking on opposite sides of a cave. The cold relief on her forehead was joined by some light dabs of cool moisture on her cheeks.

Keeping her eyes shut since it was helping keep the nausea at bay, she sat there helplessly while her daughter made several trips back to the sink to wet the washcloth and gently and thoroughly cleaned all the signs of sickness off of her face. After a few minutes of this, Shelby began to feel a little better. She opened her eyes warily and once again met her daughter's deep brown eyes, piercing into her with concern.

"Honey, what are you doing here?" She managed to croak out, wincing at how hoarse she sounded.

"I ran into Jesse downtown and he told me you were sick. I wanted to check on you. I told dad. Are you okay, mom?" Rachel implored, her voice thick with emotion.

"I'm—" Shelby suddenly broke out into a series of severe hacking coughs that left her breathless and Rachel even more worried than before.

"I'm fine," She tried again. She inhaled deeply, trying to get as much air into her congested airways as possible. "I'm sorry. I'm okay, Rach. You shouldn't be here. I don't want you to catch whatever I have."

"No, no, it's okay," the girl said, shaking her head in protest. "I want to be here. And my immune system is remarkable. Trust me, I _don't_ get sick."

If she had the energy, Shelby would've laughed at the conviction in her daughter's voice but she just smiled slightly in amusement. She placed her hand on Rachel's arm and wanted to say thank you but another dramatic and painful coughing fit interrupted her.

Rachel jumped into action and grabbed the bottle of water she left to grab earlier and handed it to Shelby. The woman graciously accepted and took small sips of the warm water under her daughter's watchful gaze.

"Stay here. I'll be right back again," Rachel instructed a second later while she got up and walked out of the bathroom in haste for the second time.

Setting the water bottle down, Shelby sighed heavily when she caught a glimpse of herself on the full-body mirror. She looked just as bad as she felt. Her normally healthy and glowing skin looked sallow and her cheekbones appeared more prominent than ever.

Shelby then frowned thinking about how she must look to her daughter. She's made it a point to stay strong and composed around her child since the moment they met. It's what she felt like she had to do. It's what she promised herself that she'd do. Especially this past week.

The sound of Rachel's hurried footsteps interrupted her thoughts and she looked up to the sight of her kid holding a banana, box of crackers, and medicine in hand. _Thoughtful to a fault_ , she recalled one of Leroy's first descriptions of their daughter.

"I got you medicine, mom," Rachel explained her absence as she crouched back down. "But dad and daddy always make me eat a little first before I take anything, so I also got you some food. Do you want the banana or crackers?"

Shelby just stared at her, wanting to say a million things right now but nothing came out.

"I'm sorry," Shelby said piteously, clearing her throat. "Thank you, Rach. But you shouldn't have to take care of me. I'm okay."

The woman tried to get up but she was struck by another wave of dizziness at the abrupt movement. Disoriented, she sank back down to the ground in defeat.

"Mom! Please just sit back down and stay still," Rachel admonished, raising her eyebrow perfectly in a way that left no room for arguments.

Feeling effectively reprimanded by her almost 14-year-old child, Shelby numbly nodded and sat as still as possible. She watched Rachel open the box of crackers and pulled out a sleeve. She then sat down next to her on the ground and offered her the saltine.

Shelby tentatively accepted and took an experimental nibble on a cracker. When it went down without trouble, she ate a few more and Rachel handed her the water bottle again. Shelby stared at it thoughtfully before opening it.

"Rachel—"

"I still love you, mom," Rachel reached over and wiped away a stray tear that escaped, in the same gentle and loving manner that she's seen her mother do it to her countless times now. "And I know that even if you don't want me, that you still _need_ me. And that's why I'm not going anywhere. Right? That's what you told me."

Overwhelmed with love for her child, Shelby released a shaky breath she's felt like she's been holding around Rachel for days now. She closed her eyes and leaned her cheek against her daughter's hand for a moment, blinking away the last of the tears she didn't even realize she'd been crying.

"I don't know what I did to deserve you, Rach," Shelby whispered more to herself than anything else. "Thank you."

Rachel nodded and gave her a small smile in response. She got up a moment later and grabbed a bottle of medicine then offered a couple pills to her.

"Are you okay?" Rachel inquired once she was satisfied that her mom was going to keep the medicine down.

"Yes, I'm okay," Shelby replied, leaning her head back against the cool wall. She placed her hand on her daughter's arm and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "And we will be too."

* * *

The next morning, Rachel carefully opened the door to her room in her mom's house and peeked out the hallway. She looked to the left then to the right listening for movement.

The teenager tiptoed down the hallway and stopped momentarily outside of her mother's bedroom. She had woken up a few minutes earlier to the sound of Shelby's whooping coughs permeating the early morning silence.

She took a timid step into the room and examined her mom's unmoving body then listened to her labored breathing for a few moments. Satisfied that the woman was still asleep, Rachel spun around and quietly made her way downstairs.

After helping Shelby to bed last night, Rachel made a last-minute decision to spend the night in case her mother took a turn for the worse. She even set a couple alarms, so she could make sure to check in on her throughout the night.

Before her second alarm went off, she woke up with a start when she heard her mom's coughing get worse. Attempting to control an irrational form of worry surging through her body, she decided to call her Aunt Kim, who she knew was working the night shift at the hospital, and apprised the nurse of the situation.

After quelling her fears, Kim promised that she would stop by in the morning to check on her sister herself. A woman of her word, it was her who Rachel found outside the door promptly at 7:00 in the morning with medicine and sustenance in hand.

"Morning, Rae!" Kim greeted with just a little too much energy and cheer for someone who just worked a 12-hour graveyard shift.

"Hey Aunt Kim, thanks for coming," Rachel said gratefully, placing a quick kiss on her cheek.

"Thanks for calling me," Kim replied, following her niece into kitchen. "Shelly would've suffered for days before she'd ask for help. She's the _worst_ when she's sick."

"She was really bad yesterday," Rachel agreed as she took the extra bags from her aunt and placed them on the counter. "Like, she was throwing up and coughing. It was gross."

Kim let out a small chuckle watching the teen grimace at the memory.

"I think it might just be a bad case of the flu," Kim assured. "And maybe the stress. I know she's been preoccupied with work and also everything else, I guess. She just needs to rest and flush it out of her system."

Kim paused and watched her niece chewing her lip and struggling with what to say, she intervened.

"I missed you at Thanksgiving, Rae," she said softly, reaching out to touch the young girl's cheek. "But I understand. And me, your uncle Brian, your cousins, and your grandparents will all wait as long as we have to. Okay? Whenever you're ready, there's no rush."

Rachel's lips quirked upwards at her aunt's reassurances. But her smile fell just as quickly thinking about how messy everything has been recently.

"Are you okay?" Kim inquired, noticing the range of emotions that had just flit across Rachel's face.

"I'm still mad at her, Aunt Kim."

"Well, have you tried talking to her?"

"She hasn't tried talking to _me_!"

"I think she might just be scared."

"Scared of what?" Rachel questioned, a mixture of annoyance and disbelief in her voice. Her mom was Shelby Corcoran. Coach Corcoran. She can't possibly be scared of anything.

"Of making you more mad? Of pushing you away?" Kim replied neutrally, taking her niece's hand in her own in an attempt to keep her from flying off the handle.

Rachel furrowed her brows deeply, an all-too familiar frustration coursing freely through her veins.

"But that's not fair," Rachel whined.

"What's not fair, Rae?" Kim asked and bit back a smirk at the obstinate look that took over her stubborn niece's face. She squeezed the young diva's hand to encourage her to continue talking. She knew Rachel needed to start to process this.

"I don't know, everything," Rachel moped. She let go of her aunt's hand and slumped her shoulders. Her entire body and countenance dropped dramatically and she released a loud, drawn out sigh. "I'm supposed to be mad at her, but now I can't be because she's all sick and you're guilting me into forgiving her."

Kim couldn't help the laugh of amusement that escaped her lips. Rachel was so much like her older sister. In the best and most dramatic way possible.

The teenager huffed and crossed her arms in response.

"Aunt Kimmie, _don't_ laugh at me," Rachel said in a hurt tone. "I'm being _serious_."

Kim instantly sobered up and felt her heart flutter at her niece's new nickname for her. She walked over to the sullen girl and brought her in for a hug, smiling when Rachel melted into her embrace.

"I'm sorry, Rae. I didn't mean to laugh," Kim said apologetically while she rubbed her niece's back in comfort. After a few moments, she pulled away and looked over the hurt girl with concern. "I get it. And you are totally allowed to feel how you feel. Your mom messed up. She promised you one thing, but then did the other."

"She did," Rachel pouted pitifully. "I needed her."

"I know you did, kid," Kim smiled at her sadly. "But it was a mistake, Rachel. Shelly didn't intend to make you feel like you couldn't come to her. I know that for a fact."

Rachel nodded her head in acknowledgment of her aunt's words but something deep inside her was keeping her from absorbing it fully. She sighed again realizing that the only person she really wanted to talk to about this was her mother.

"You have every right to be upset with your mom, Rachel. But you can't keep punishing her forever," Kim continued. "At least you shouldn't. I know it's hurting you just as much as it's hurting her."

"Okay, I'll think about it," Rachel stated, not committed to making any promises.

"That's all I ask," Kim grinned and placed a quick kiss on the top of her niece's head. She began to walk away but paused momentarily then turned back around. "Rae? For what it's worth, I just want you to know that before all of this happened, I haven't seen your mom _this_ happy since well, I don't know, maybe before you were born? I just—I don't know if she's talked to you about it but Shelly had a _really_ hard time giving you up and being away from you for all those years. And it was only pretty recently that she's started to come to terms with it. Then all of a sudden you're back and she's a mom. And I'm not defending what she did. She should've just been honest with you, but it's hard being a mom. I'm still learning and struggle constantly, so I can only imagine how Shelly must feel being so new at this. But I know she loves you more than anything, so I also know she's going to try her best. Just remember that."

"I will," Rachel whispered, her stomach flipping. She doesn't want to talk about this anymore.

Picking up on the teenager's rising internal panic, Kim quickly decided to shift gears and change the subject.

"Good, now let's eat? I brought some extra waffles for us. And I've been _dying_ to talk to you about this, but you absolutely _must_ tell me all the gossip you have from Quinn about Frannie and Will."

Rachel's defenses automatically went down and she let out a joyful laugh. Music to Kim's ears.

"Yeah, glee club has been interesting with Quinn," Rachel chuckled as she perched herself on the stool, watching the older woman prepare their breakfast. "Aunt Kim?"

"Yeah, Rae?" Kim paused to give Rachel her undivided attention.

"You're a great aunt, so I can't really imagine you struggling. I think Robby and Lily are lucky to have you."

"Aw thanks, kid," Kim said, beaming at her niece. "That means a lot to me. And you better _believe_ that I'm going to remind you that you said that whenever you get mad at me."

* * *

A little more than an hour later, Shelby walked into the kitchen extremely confused at the sight of her daughter standing over the sink washing dishes.

"Rach?"

Completely engrossed with the chore, the teen first flinched in surprise at the call then spun around to meet her mom's curious gaze.

Rachel gave her a polite smile then shifted her focus back to cleaning the last plate.

"Morning mom, how do you feel?" Rachel asked, not breaking from her dishwashing mission.

"Hi—good morning, honey. How long have you been here?" Shelby inquired, glancing at the clock. It was only a little after 8:00. It was way too early for her kid to be over doing chores.

"Mom, what are you talking about? I spent the night," Rachel replied as she turned back around to face Shelby, drying her hands with the kitchen towel.

"Oh, what? Where did you sleep?"

"In my room," the teen said nonchalantly with a shrug of her shoulders. "We talked about this last night, mom. You even made me call dad _and_ daddy to let them know, remember?"

"No," Shelby responded, confusion marked all over her face. She must've been more out of it than she realized. Of course the first night that her child spends in her house, she's too disoriented to realize it. _Mother of the year indeed._ "I'm sorry, Rach. I must've been confused. I didn't realize. I would've tucked you in or checked if you were okay. Did you sleep alright?"

"It's okay, I was fine, and I slept well," Rachel answered truthfully. In fact, despite waking up periodically throughout the night, it was some of the most comfortable sleep she's had in more than a week.

"Good," Shelby smiled timidly. "Well, thank you for staying, Rach. I really appreciate that."

Rachel nodded in acceptance but felt uncomfortable at how grateful the woman sounded for something as simple as her spending the night. _Had she really pushed her mom away that much?  
_  
"Are you feeling better?" Rachel prompted, needing to change the subject.

"Yeah, a bit," Shelby admitted as she stretched her limbs. She had woken up feeling significantly better. She could breathe easier and was less congested now, but still felt weak and sluggish.

"Did you cook?" The mother craned her neck, trying to find the source of the delicious smell tickling her nose.

"No," Rachel laughed at the thought. "Besides, you told me that I'm not allowed to touch anything in your kitchen after PizzaGate. I called Aunt Kim last night and she brought by breakfast. Waffles, of course. And also soup for you to eat later. And some more medicine. And she said she's going to stop by again tonight before her night shift to check on you."

Surprised and sincerely touched by the gesture, Shelby closed the distance between them and pulled her kid in for a hug for the first time in days. Her heart felt like it could burst feeling Rachel slowly wrap her arms around her. Shelby held on tightly and kissed the top of her daughter's head. She hopes she can close the emotional distance between them too.

"Thank you, Rach," Shelby said with as much gratitude as she can muster. "You didn't have to do that."

"I just called Aunt Kim, mom. It's no big deal," the teen shrugged while she let go and stepped away from her mother's embrace. As good as it felt, she wasn't ready for too much physical affection yet.

"Still," Shelby replied, steeling herself at how Rachel seemed to tense up again after their hug. _Baby steps_ , she reminded herself. "I appreciate the concern. You don't have to take care of me."

"I know, but you always take care of me," Rachel countered, worry coloring her expression. "Who's going to take care of you?"

"Ba—" Shelby sighed, remembering her daughter's rebuke of the term of endearment last week. "Rachel," she corrected. "I _am_ sorry."

"I know mom," the girl dropped her gaze and moved away from the older woman. Her eyes trained to the floor, she walked around to the other side of the island to put some needed space between them.

Rachel started taking food out of the plastic bags and turned around to open a cabinet then grabbed some dishes. She set it down then began assembling a plate of waffles and a bowl of fruit. Only once she was finished, she finally looked up and met anxious green eyes.

"I am sorry too. For everything. For running away. For being mad. I know I've been so weird lately, but it's only because I just—I feel uncomfortable around you right now. I don't know why. I'm so sorry, mom. I'm still hurt and confused by everything, and I think I need more time."

Rachel just stared at her sadly with watery eyes and pushed the plate of food towards her. Shelby's heart effectively snapped into two at her daughter's kindness despite how she felt.

She _hates_ this.

"Okay," Shelby nodded and forced herself to smile slightly. This wasn't up to her. If Rachel needed more time, that's exactly what she's going to give her. "I understand. I will wait however long you need."

"You will?" Rachel asked, in a tone more unsure than the mother was comfortable with.

"Of course I will," Shelby promised then leaned over and squeezed her daughter's arm. "But please don't shut me out for too long, Rach. I love you and I miss you, so much. And I want to help you, more than anything—I just want to help."

Rachel nodded understandingly. She opened the drawer to her right, pulled out utensils, and handed them to her mother.

"Me too, mom."

* * *

 **A/N: Thanks a ton for reading and sharing all your thoughts with me about this story. It is always appreciated!**

 **Next chapter will include some of the glee kids, a hospital visit, and more of S/R fixing things between them (promise).**


	15. Chapter 15

"Rachel," Quinn called the brunette's attention, noticing the faraway look in her eyes.

Not eliciting a response, she tried again.

"Rachel?"

Silence. The cheerleader huffed.

"Rachel!" Quinn stated, a little louder this time.

Blinking, Rachel finally turned her head and met irritated hazel eyes.

"Quinn. Do you think that there's something wrong with me?"

"What? No," Quinn replied easily and without hesitation. " _But_ I do think that there's something wrong with Finn. Have you heard him talk about his grilled cheese? He's convinced that he's seen the face of God on his sandwich."

Rachel shot her a look of pure confusion. She had so many questions. Shaking her head, she walked into the empty elevator the moment the doors opened.

"Yeah, my reaction exactly," Quinn laughed in amusement. "He's calling it the _Grilled Cheesus_ and allegedly, it's been answering his prayers."

"What floor is it again?" Rachel asked as her hand hovered over the buttons.

"Six," Quinn answered and glanced at her unusually quiet company. She's known Rachel for a few months now and the girl was anything but reserved. In fact, it was more normal for Quinn to be begging her to stop sharing her _many_ unsolicited opinions. "Why were you asking me if I think that something's wrong with you?"

"Oh, nothing, never mind," Rachel said a little quickly, her eyes trained on the numbers lighting up with each floor they passed.

"Yeah right. Just tell me what's on your mind, Rachel."

Shifting nervously on her feet, Rachel exhaled a loaded sigh.

"My parents have been on my case about seeing a therapist," she admitted freely, diving in before she could change her mind. "As you know, my life has been somewhat _chaotic_ recently. And as much as I believe that this will truly only help me become a better actress in the future; you know, since I'll have all these tragic life experiences to draw from, it's just been a lot for me to handle. My mom and dads think that I should talk to a professional about this, but I don't know, isn't that a bit much? Therapy?"

The elevator dinged the moment Rachel finished her sentence and stopped at their destination. They both walked out and Quinn paused trying to absorb what Rachel just said.

"I don't know?" She said honestly, observing Rachel's exhausted appearance. Almost annoyingly always put together, Rachel had been _off_ during the past couple of weeks.

Since extending her offer to be a sounding board, this is the first time that Rachel has ever taken her up on it. Quinn had overheard her mom talking to Anne about something that happened with Rachel over Thanksgiving, but she didn't try to ask. It wasn't any of her business, and she hates it when people pry about things that don't concern them.

"I mean, wouldn't it be helpful for you to talk to someone who's not any of your parents? So you can say whatever you want without being afraid of like hurting their feelings or anything like that?"

"I suppose," Rachel said skeptically with a shrug of her shoulders.

Quinn raised a good point, but she was still unsure about it. She doesn't see how it can be helpful to her. She knows she just needs more time to adjust to everything and it felt like her parents didn't trust her anymore to handle this. Admittedly, she hasn't made the best decisions recently. But processing this independently and in her own way, at her own pace felt like the last bit of control she had over the situation. She was a little more than reluctant to relinquish that, especially to a stranger.

"I'm not going to tell you what to do," Quinn added a moment after not receiving any more elaboration. "But I honestly don't think that you needing to talk to someone about all of this means that there's something wrong with you. I just think that it means that you need some extra help learning how to deal. If it were me, I definitely would."

Rachel nodded thoughtfully and tried to listen for any judgment in Quinn's voice. Finding none, she smiled appreciatively at the advice.

"Thanks, Quinn. I'll think about it, but I don't really feel like talking about it anymore, so let's just go find Kurt?"

"Yeah," the blonde agreed, turning on her heel and leading them down the hallway. "I feel really bad for him. I hope he's okay."

"Me too. I feel awful about his dad. I hope he wakes up soon."

Earlier on in the week, Mr. Schuester and Ms. Pillsbury interrupted their French class and pulled Kurt aside to let him know that his father, Burt Hummel, had a heart attack. It's been a few days since then and Burt has yet to regain consciousness. The longer he stayed in coma, the more it affected Kurt. Everybody on the Glee Club were trying to be as supportive as possible, but Kurt seemed to grow angrier with each passing day and was more hesitant than ever to accept their help. However, they carried on and tried to be as understanding and supportive of their friend as possible. He was finally letting them visit, and Quinn and Rachel decided to take advantage of the opportunity.

The pair walked down the hallway quietly, both engrossed in their own thoughts. As they got closer, Santana, Brittany, and Kurt shuffled out of the room. He made eye contact with the two and waved at them politely before crossing his arms and turning his attention back to the two cheerleaders.

"We're really sorry about your dad's heart attack again," Santana said sincerely, in the gentlest tone that Kurt has ever heard her speak.

"Yeah," Brittany agreed. "Also, I did a report on heart attacks if you want to give it to the doctor. I got knocked down an entire letter grade cause it was written in crayon."

Brittany took out a stapled book made out of various colored construction paper from her binder and handed it to Kurt with a kind smile.

"Thanks, Brittany," Kurt forced himself to grin somewhat at the gesture.

"Anytime. In it, I write about how heart attacks are just from loving too much."

"Hey guys," Quinn greeted, cutting into the conversation as they joined the group. "How's it going, Kurt?"

"Just having the time of my life this week, Quinn."

An awkward silence immediately followed and Kurt felt bad instantly. He didn't mean to be short, but he was just so sick and tired of everyone asking him how he felt. His dad, his rock, his only parent left, was lying on a hospital bed showing no signs of waking up any time soon. _How is he supposed to feel?_

"We're sorry, Kurt," Rachel broke the silence a beat later. "We came to drop off your homework from the last couple of days. We just wanted to do something. Please don't push us away."

"Mercedes wanted to come, but she had church choir practice," Quinn added. "But she told me to bring you this and said to tell you that she's excited for you to go to church with her on Sunday."

Quinn pulled out a stylish fedora from her backpack and offered it to him. Kurt accepted the hat and examined it carefully. He brushed his fingers through the feathers and felt some of his anger drain.

"You're right. I'm sorry," Kurt apologized, shaking his head. "I shouldn't be pushing my friends away. Especially friends as fabulous as you guys."

He offered them a genuine smile this time and found himself wrapped up in a group hug in the middle of all of his friends. His heart warming, he soaked up their kindness and support for strength.

"Alright, that's enough affection," Santana said, pulling away first then looked directly at Rachel. "And just because we hugged this one time _does not_ mean that we're friends now, Berry. So don't get any ideas."

"Wouldn't dream of it, Satan," Rachel replied curtly, rolling her eyes in exasperation at yet another one of the cheerleader's jabs.

"Are you guys heading out now?" Quinn diverted, attempting to change the subject.

"Yup," Santana answered. "Me and Britt are actually about to have dinner with Puck. He buys us dinner, we make out in front of him. It's like, the best deal ever."

Brittany grinned in agreement and Quinn shook her head at her best friends.

"Alright, well, let me walk you out cause I forgot I have to tell you what I overheard during Cheerios practice the other day," Quinn paused and looked at Rachel and Kurt. "Is that okay? I'll be right back."

* * *

After they said their goodbyes, Rachel and Kurt watched the three cheerleaders walk away in synchronized steps for a few seconds before Rachel snapped her attention back to her friend.

"Still no signs of him waking up?" She asked cautiously.

"Nope," Kurt sighed dejectedly as he slumped down in one of the chairs outside of his dad's hospital room. "Carole's in there with him right now. And I called an acupuncturist earlier. She's going to see if acupuncture will help improve the circulation to my dad's brain."

"That's a good idea," Rachel commented, taking the seat next to Kurt. "Um—I'm also praying for him. I know you asked us not to during Glee this week, and yeah, although technically I'm Jewish, sometimes I still don't really know what I believe in. But, I _do_ believe in _something_ and I'm still praying that he'll be okay."

"Thanks," Kurt said simply after the girl finished rambling. He has been struggling with Mr. Schue's spirituality lesson this week, but he also does appreciate the thoughts. He sank back further in his seat a moment later and felt an intense wave of exhaustion just hit him. And guilt. "Rachel?"

"Yeah, Kurt?"

"The last thing that my dad said to me was that he was disappointed in me," Kurt whispered brokenly, ignoring Rachel's half-confused glance. "Friday nights. We have dinner together as a family. It's tradition. They're _sacred_. And this week, Carole and Finn were supposed to join us but—"

"We had plans to go to the 'Sound of Music' Sing-A-Long," Rachel completed his sentence, putting the pieces together and nodding in understanding. "Oh Kurt, I don't think that your dad could ever be disappointed in you. I mean he must've been a little upset that you didn't place the same importance on the dinners as him, but still. You're a good son, Kurt. I know this because even though we haven't known each other for that long, I still know how important your dad is to you."

Rachel paused and snuck a peek at him, who was electing to stay silent. She can see the guilt eating him up inside and she understands that feeling all too well. She grabbed his hand and gave it a comforting squeeze.

"You know, I think you're really brave, Kurt," Rachel continued. "You've been through a lot. I see how Karofsky, Azimio, and those other guys treat you, but you still manage to hold your head high and show people that _nothing_ is going to get to you, even when it does. That's courageous to me, and it makes me proud to be your friend. I'm sure if your dad were awake, he'd agree with me too."

"Thanks, Rachel," Kurt responded genuinely, sitting up straighter so he could make eye contact. At first, he didn't really know what Rachel was about. He thought that she was a bit too ambitious and self-absorbed, but he's slowly starting to realize that maybe he had her pegged wrong and that she's a lot more than that. "I'm glad we're friends."

"Me too," Rachel's face lit up. "And I don't know, someone told me recently that in the end, everything will be alright. Maybe not today, or tomorrow, but _eventually,_ and I think your dad will eventually be okay."

"I hope so. I just feel horrible that the last real conversation we had together was a fight. Then, of course, I spent the next couple of days after that acting like a total brat. I feel so stupid for being so angry about something so insignificant. He's the _only_ family I have left, Rachel. I hate fighting with him. It doesn't make me feel good at all, you know? "

"Yeah," Rachel whispered, guilt creeping up and settling heavily on her stomach as she thought about her current reality with her mother. "I do know."

 _What was she doing?_ It's been another week since Rachel spent the night taking care of her mom while she was sick, two weeks since Thanksgiving, and things still haven't gone back to normal. They were still skirting around each other, unwilling to make the first move. Granted, the ball was in Rachel's court since she was the one who asked for space, but she felt stuck now and she didn't know how to change or end the stupid chicken game they were both playing.

To make matters worse, they had their first honest-to-God, all-out fight while Rachel was over for dinner a couple nights ago. She's been going through the full spectrum of emotions over the situation with her mother and lately anger and frustration have been rising to the top and bubbling over into her actions. She can't even remember now what instigated their disagreement, but the only thing ingrained into her memory was the perfect mixture of disappointment and hurt spelled across her mother's face. It was the first time that her mom had ever raised her voice at her, and she knew she deserved it. Rachel felt like she was having an out-of-body experience watching an unrecognizable spiteful and bitter version of herself snapping at Shelby for no good reason other than from perhaps trying to get a rise out of her, politeness be damned.

And nothing, _nothing_ that has happened in the past couple of months has made her feel as bad as watching her mom walk away from her in the heat of their argument and shutting the door to her study without looking back.

Shelby eventually came out an hour later after they had both cooled off. She was even the one who apologized to her first for walking away. It blew Rachel's mind. She wanted to surrender right then and there and throw herself into her mother's arms and finally allow herself to be comforted; instead, she found herself mumbling a lame apology and refusing to make eye contact. She felt _awful_. Even worse, Shelby just let it all go and went back to being calm and collected.

And here Rachel was, not even sure why she was punishing her mom anymore. It was an incredibly lousy thing to do especially considering the possibility that Kurt may not even get a chance to speak to his dad again. All she's ever wanted was her mom and now that she finally has her, it seems like all that she's interested in doing is pushing her away. _And for what?_

Her heart beating profoundly in her chest at the sudden realization, Rachel stood up abruptly and Kurt stared at her with confusion.

"Rachel?" His brows knitting at how unsettled she look.

Before she could respond, the door flung open and Carole practically sprinted out into the hallway, her eyes wild as she turned around to face the two teenagers.

"Carole?" Kurt asked in alarm, his stomach dropping as he rose to his feet.

"Kurt! Your dad, he—he squeezed my hand. I think he might be waking up," Carole stammered, tears welling up in her tired eyes.

Kurt let out a breath that's been tortuously trapped in his chest for days. His eyes watering, he looked at Carole first then at Rachel unsure of what to do next.

"Nurse Nancy!" He yelled for help.

* * *

Seemingly frozen in place, Rachel watched Kurt and Carole charge into the hospital room while a blur of blue scrubs followed them inside.

For Rachel, every sound faded away it was as if she was watching it all unfold in slow motion. Bodies crowded around the hospital bed. A doctor hustled into the room. The blood pounded in her ears. Her heart thumped in her chest.

She blinked and suddenly she saw Shelby in the hospital bed instead of Burt. All the air rushed out of her lungs. She blinked again and she was gone.

A second later, a hand on her arm yanked her back to reality. The silence snapped and the air around her continued moving again. She turned around and met Quinn's puzzled expression. She sucked in a sharp breath and felt all senses return to her body.

"Hey, what's up, are you okay?"

Rachel whipped her head back to the room and watched Kurt carefully attend to his father who was slowly starting to grow more conscious.

"Um—Mr. Hummel woke up."

"Really? That's great!" Quinn remarked excitedly, craning her neck over Rachel's shoulder to peer through the window. She paused once she realized she didn't receive the same amount of animation from the brunette.

"What's going on with you?"

"I don't know, I think I have to go though," Rachel said distractedly. "I have to see my mom."

"What? Right now? We just got here."

"I know sorry, but I _have_ to," Rachel decided as she grabbed her coat off the chair. "I'm going to call my dad to come get me. Please tell Kurt I'm sorry for leaving so soon."

Offering no other explanation, Rachel walked away and forced her feet to move down the hall as quickly as she could without breaking out into a run. Making a dash for the elevator, she pressed the button frantically.

When the doors opened, Rachel stepped in, still immensely lost in her thoughts. With her eyes remained focused on her feet, she was completely oblivious to her surroundings.

"We'll just continue to monitor it, dad," Kim said, carrying on a serious conversation with her father. "It's good that you came in. Let's just not ring the alarms yet—"

"Rachel?" Robert interrupted Kim as he turned his attention to the young girl who had just walked in and turned her back to them. He placed his hand on her shoulder and she spun around in shock to face two equally surprised adults.

"Grandpa? Aunt Kim? Wh-what are you guys doing here?"

Both Kim and Robert froze and shared a brief imperceptible look that Rachel seemed to miss.

"We—"

"Your grandpa came to visit me," Kim interjected. "Hi Rae, what's going on? What are _you_ doing here?" The woman inquired as she pulled her niece in for a quick hug.

Before she could answer, the elevator arrived on the ground floor and the three shuffled out to congregate in the lobby.

"I came to visit my friend Kurt. His dad is here because he had a heart attack a few days ago," Rachel replied, examining the pair curiously.

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that," Robert said emphatically. "Is he alright now?"

"Does your mom know you're here?" Kim questioned.

"Yeah, I think he'll be okay. And dad knows I'm here, but I um—I was actually leaving to go see mom now," Rachel admitted. "Actually, grandpa, are you leaving? Do you think you can drive me to Carmel?"

"I think Shelly's in rehearsal right now Rae," Kim responded.

"Oh, I know, but—"

"Of course I'll take you sweetheart," Robert answered, flashing Kim a look of disapproval. He can see that there was something weighing on the girl and he was not going to deny her the chance to see her mother if that's what she wanted. He also knew that it was past due for the mother and daughter to begin to work through some of their recent issues, and he was going to help facilitate that in any way that he can. "Let's go take you to your mom.

* * *

At Carmel, Shelby watched her team rehearse their Lady Gaga number intently, scrutinizing every minute detail on the quest for perfection. With rapt attention, she narrowed her eyes critically, searching for any mistakes that needed to be corrected as her team danced almost flawlessly to the electro-pop beats filling the grand auditorium.

Satisfied for now, she decided to give them a rare break after realizing that they were on their sixth consecutive run-through.

"Yeah that's better guys, take five," Shelby instructed into the microphone from her position at the director's table. "And ladies, I don't want to hear about chafing just because you're being forced to wear metal underwear. Not my problem."

With a sigh, she pushed the mic away and picked up her pen to write down the mental notes she made earlier. Truth be told, she also needed a break. They were on day five of their two-a-day rehearsals that she mandated since she lost so much practice time while she was out of commission with the flu. It was taxing for her and her students, but it needed to be done to get them back on track. Consistency won championships.

And if Shelby were being really honest, she was also falling on old patterns and employing her motto of 'When the going gets tough, the tough call extra Vocal Adrenaline practices.' She was in desperate need of a distraction from the current strife with her daughter.

"Mom?" Rachel's voice called her attention, effectively jarring her from her thoughts.

Shelby turned her head to the left to find her teenager standing in the aisle a few feet away, wringing her hands apprehensively.

"Honey, you've _got_ to stop sneaking into these rehearsals," she said before she could stop herself. It's not what she meant to say, but she was in no mood to deal with an insolent Rachel today.

Things between them have been strenuous at the best and it was slowly wearing her down. She was doing everything in her power to be patient and understanding with Rachel, but it's been weeks and her daughter was still demonstrating no interest whatsoever in making amends, even acting contemptuous at times. The situation was becoming unbearable and her kid's constant stream of rejections have been crushing her heart into pieces with each passing day.

"It's kind of important," Rachel replied with a quiver in her voice. "I-I really need you right now."

Rachel looked down at the floor and then directly at Shelby with pleading brown eyes. Taking in the distress evident across her daughter's face, Shelby sighed and nodded. She still had an hour left of rehearsal, but her daughter comes first. No matter what.

"Okay, Rachel. Let me just release my kids and then I will meet you in my office," she instructed while she grabbed her keys and extended her arm out to hand it to the girl. Rachel walked over timidly and accepted them, holding on to the woman's hand a little longer than planned.

Shelby raised an eyebrow slightly at the action. Rachel hasn't let her touch her in days. It's been killing her, but the girl had asked for space. Shaking it off as a fluke, she straightened up and cleared her throat uncomfortably.

"Go ahead and wait for me. I will be with you in a few minutes," she urged in a tone more firm than she had intended. She can't help it. Ever since they fought the other day, her walls have been up. She was frustrated and she hated that she felt like she had to protect herself, from her own daughter of all people.

Before she could correct herself, Rachel didn't say another word and turned sharply on her heel to follow her orders. Shelby mentally berated herself watching her child walk down the aisle despondently. Fighting against the unbidden tears prickling the corner of her eyes, she got up a moment later to end rehearsal so she can get back to her daughter. She was going to fix things between them come hell or high water.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, Shelby walked down the hall with a purposeful stride, her heels clicking against the tiled floor. Feeling a burst of anxiety all of a sudden, she paused outside of her office door and rested her hand against the cool wall as she gained her bearings.

After drawing in a long and slow deep breath, she twisted the doorknob and entered the room to the sight of her daughter hunched over in a chair, her face buried in her hands.

Rachel raised her head slightly but dropped her gaze immediately. She was nervous to say the least. She doesn't know if she's dealing with her mom or Coach Corcoran at the moment.

Saying nothing, Shelby set her things down and walked over to stand in front of the distraught teenager. Crossing her arms and leaning against the edge of her desk, she took another second to center herself before plunging in.

"What's the matter, Rachel?"

Rachel fidgeted nervously under Shelby's inquisitive gaze. She opened and closed her mouth a few times but struggled with what to say. Waves of guilt have been crashing down on her and remorse over how she's handled everything recently has been gnawing at her insides since she left the hospital. And what bothered her the most was how cold and detached her mother was being, which was a far cry from the doting, caring, and affectionate woman that she's come to love. It occurred to her then that this must be how her mom has been feeling about how she's been acting.

Shelby saw the panic begin to take over the young girl's face and she immediately felt all of her defenses fall. Sighing, she softened her entire stance.

"Come here, baby," Shelby urged gently, opening her arms up to her daughter.

In an instant, Rachel launched herself at her mother, slamming into Shelby with a force that belied her small size. She hugged Shelby so hard that she knocked the breath out her, but she couldn't bring herself to notice as she buried her face against the woman's chest. Shutting her eyes tightly to keep herself from crying, she grabbed fistfuls of Shelby's sweater with a strong grip as she absorbed the comfort and security of finally being in her mother's arms.

" _Hey_ , it's okay," Shelby said quietly, rubbing random patterns soothingly on Rachel's back. "You're okay, baby."

"I'm—I'm still your baby?" Rachel whispered a moment later, her voice muffled against the wool of her mother's shirt.

Shelby pulled her head back so she can look Rachel in the eyes.

"Then, now, and _always_ ," she promised wholeheartedly. "Even when you're forty and you have your own children, Rachel. You'll always be my baby."

"I'm so sorry mom," Rachel mumbled, dropping her head as the shame of how she's been acting slowly started to overcome her.

The mother sighed and took both of her daughter's hands and held onto to them.

"What did you say, Rach?"

Shelby had heard Rachel's apology, but her daughter needed to learn how to apologize properly. She needed her to know that her actions, intentional or not, affect others.

The teenager shifted anxiously on her feet and Shelby squeezed her hands in encouragement.

"I said that I'm sorry," Rachel cleared her throat and finally brought her eyes up to look at her mother sincerely. "I'm sorry for how I've been treating you, mom."

"Why were you doing it, Rachel?" She questioned. Shelby decided earlier that she was no longer going to be polite when it came to these conversations with her daughter. Toeing around the issue was no longer working. She needed her kid to open up to her if they had any chance of surviving this.

Rachel's stomach dropped and her heart thudded in her chest at her mother's prompting. Usually, she would've accepted her apology and moved on. She looked down again and chewed on her bottom lip nervously trying to gather her thoughts. She let go of her mother's hands and met her gaze again a few seconds later.

"B-because I'm still confused," Rachel stammered while she took a step back away from Shelby. She didn't do it on purpose. Putting the space between them was a subconscious defense mechanism. "And hurt and mad at you.. for just giving me up. And not wanting to be with me all these years."

Shelby felt her throat choke up. She forced herself to breathe and gathered all the strength she could find deep inside of her not to cry. How was she supposed to convince her daughter that she didn't stay away from her because she _wanted_ to?

"Rachel—"

"I know it's dumb, mom. I know I sound selfish and ungrateful because dad and daddy are amazing and they gave me everything. And here I was _still_ feeling like something was missing. But I needed a mom. I needed you," Rachel confessed, sharing her true feelings once she realized that she had nothing left to lose. This was Shelby, her mother. If anyone was going to fix this, it was going to be her. "I don't know. But now that I have you, I don't even know how to feel. I'm happy and sad, but also I'm mostly mad at myself because I feel like I'm just messing everything up. I'm being a bad daughter. I'm sorry. I keep pushing you away and I don't even know why. I don't know what I'm doing."

Shelby watched her daughter spill her heart out and increase the distance between them with every word. Her chest tightened as she took in Rachel's disheartening admission. She inhaled another calming breath and pushed aside the swirling range of emotions that she felt building up.

Thinking quickly, she rose to her feet and walked around her desk. She bent down slightly to search for something in her drawer then pulled out a wooden keepsake box a few seconds later. She made her way back to the front of her desk and perched herself back on the edge of mahogany surface.

"Can you please take a seat, Rach?"

Rachel hesitated and narrowed her eyes at her mom suspiciously. Sighing, she slumped back down on the designated spot and realized just how _exhausted_ she felt.

"Mom?"

"Did you know that your dads sent me a letter every year, always around your birthday, to update me on you, on how you were doing, on what you were up to?"

Rachel nodded her head in confirmation. Her dads mentioned it when they first brought up that Shelby was her mom, which felt like it was yesterday and a million years ago at the same time.

"And they also sent pictures of you," Shelby added, reaching slightly behind her and turning around a framed photo of Rachel at age six. Rachel leaned over and grabbed the picture of the younger version of herself clad in ballet flats and a pink tutu beaming her signature megawatt smile, which was more like a toothless grin since she was in the middle of losing all her baby teeth at the time.

"That was the first dance competition I won," Rachel recalled the memory fondly.

"I know, baby," Shelby said, her voice soft. "I wish I could've been there."

"Me too," Rachel whispered, grazing her thumb over the frame. She's been in her mom's office maybe a handful of times now and this was the first she was seeing this photo. She glanced at the shelf to her periphery and also noticed her seventh grade school picture propped up next to photos of her cousins.

Rachel swallowed hard and placed the photo back on the desk carefully, refusing to make eye contact with Shelby.

"I wrote you back, Rach," Shelby explained once the teenager relaxed back into her seat. "Every year, I wrote you back a letter to tell you what I was doing, what I was up to. I think my plan was to give it to you when you turned 18, so you'd also know what I was doing the entire time we were apart. I don't know, it sounds kind of silly now, but there are 13 letters in here. I didn't get one from your dads last year, but I wrote one regardless. And obviously, they didn't send one this year, but I started writing one anyway. That's what I was doing in my study after our fight."

Her heart pounding, she handed the wooden box over to her daughter reluctantly. She wasn't planning to do this. At first, the letters were meant to be for Rachel, but with each passing year, the tradition became more for her. It was an annual ritual that allowed her to work through some of the guilt and regret that has plagued her every time she thought about the surrogacy and walking away from her baby. It was painful but simultaneously cathartic for her and helped her cope with some of those difficult feelings.

"I want to give this to you," Shelby said with a determined nod. "You don't have to read it now. You don't have to read it ever. You can do whatever you want with these letters Rach, but I do want you to look at what I started writing the other day."

Rachel hesitantly accepted the box from her mother. She unlatched it and opened it slowly, taking out the first envelope marked with this year's date. Before she opened it, she looked up at Shelby who gave her an encouraging nod. She carefully slipped her finger under the tucked flap and pulled out the letter from inside of it.

" _Dear Rachel,_

 _We're finally together again, baby. And you're everything that I had hoped you'd be and more. You are beautiful, strong, kind, and intelligent. You're truly incredible and getting to know you and being your mom is even better than I could have ever imagined. I never realized how much I would love being a mother, and I know I only love it so much more because I get to be your mom. But to be honest with you, I'm afraid. I'm scared that I'm messing everything up between us. I'm scared that I'm making all of the wrong decisions. I'm scared that I'm pushing you away. I'm scared that I'm being a bad mother. And I'm terrified more than anything that I'm not the mom that you deserve. I'm sorry, Rachel. I don't know what I'm doing."_

Brows furrowing, Rachel scanned the rest of the paper for more but that's where the letter ended. Her hands shaking, she looked up at her mom for an explanation, confusion written all over her face.

Rachel's breath hitched in her throat as more of what her mother wrote settled on her mind. She felt paralyzed and she didn't even realize she was crying until the unexpected tears landed on her hand still gripping the letter. Watching her teardrops smudge the ink, something inside of her snapped and days of repressed emotions suddenly came crashing down on her.

Seeing her daughter's face crumple in on itself, Shelby stood up on her heels and pried the letter away from her hands. Jumping into action, she placed the box back on desk and held Rachel's hand to lead her to the couch along the wall. Sitting down gracefully, she patted her lap and started to pull her daughter down to join her.

Still crying, Rachel shook her head in protest and remained firmly on her feet.

"No mom, I can't. I'm too old to sit on your lap."

"I'm not asking, baby," Shelby replied sternly as she tugged on Rachel's arm. In one smooth move, she had her daughter on her lap and her arms wrapped tightly around her, knowing that they both needed this.

As Rachel settled in her mom's warm embrace, the tears fell harder and quicker. It was as if her entire heart, body, and soul was just waiting to find a safe place to fall apart.

"I'm so sorry, mom," Rachel sobbed from her position tucked up against Shelby's chest.

"It's okay, baby, it's okay," Shelby soothed. She held on tighter and wished more than anything that she can take away all the hurt that Rachel felt. She was so tired of seeing her daughter cry. She hated it more than anything else.

Once Rachel's sobs began to subside, Shelby shifted her carefully so she can see her better. She wiped away the tears and stray hair from her child's face tenderly and looked over her with concern.

"Can we talk again, Rach?" Shelby asked as she stroked her daughter's long brown hair.

"Yeah, sorry," the girl sniffled loudly and without warning, wiped her nose on her mother's shoulder. Shelby grimaced in response and shook her head as she thought of her brand new and _white_ cashmere sweater before quickly dismissing it. Rachel and her feelings were way more valuable than a stupid sweater.

"I didn't show you that letter to make you feel bad, Rach," Shelby said honestly. "I wanted you to read it because I want you to know that just like you, I also don't know how to feel. I also don't know what I'm doing. And that I'm also scared that I'm messing everything up. I need you to know that you're not alone and that this is just as overwhelming and confusing for me as it is for you."

Shelby paused and waited for Rachel to take in what she said. Once she received a slight nod, she continued.

"Like I told you before, I think the only way we can get through this is if we're honest with one another. _And_ if we start cutting each other some slack, Rach."

Shelby hooked a finger under her daughter's chin and raised it gently so she can make eye contact. She needed her to hear this part.

"Me and you kid? We're not perfect," Shelby said, giving her a small smile. "Far from it. And chances are, my love, is that we are going to continue to mess up. And that's okay, Rachel. It is. I'm learning how to be a mom and you're learning how to have a mom. That's a lot and it's _hard_ , so it's okay for us to stumble, it's okay for us to fight, it's okay to be upset with each other sometimes, and it's _okay_ for us not to know what to do. _But_ what is absolutely _not okay_ is when we start shutting each other out, when we start pushing each other away, and when we start giving up. None of that is okay, Rachel. Do you understand?"

"Yes. I do," Rachel confirmed. Everything her mom had said was right. She hasn't been fair and she knew that she needed to be more considerate and forgiving, or she at least had to try. Being angry for the sake of being angry wasn't going to get them anywhere. "I'm sorry, mom. I really am."

"I know baby, I am too," Shelby apologized earnestly, pressing a kiss on top of brown locks. "We'll be okay, Rachel. You're not a _bad daughter_ and I'm not a _bad mother_. We're just struggling, kid. But we'll figure it out. I know we will. We just have to support one another. And ask for help when we need it. Have you—have you thought any more about seeing a therapist, Rach?"

Shelby felt Rachel's entire body tense up immediately at the question. She wrapped her arms around her again in an effort to keep her grounded emotionally and physically. They needed to have this discussion.

"I don't know," Rachel replied, burrowing her face in Shelby's shoulder. She's still not prepared to talk about this.

"Why not, baby?" Shelby coaxed, not willing to relent yet.

"Because mom, I just don't want to feel like there's something wrong with me," Rachel stated. She sighed dramatically and maneuvered herself out of her mother's arms a second later. Acting purely on instinct again, Rachel got up and started to walk away. Shelby's reflexes were milliseconds faster and grabbed the teenager's arm before she could take another step.

"Sit back down right now, Rachel Barbara," Shelby demanded. Her daughter needed to learn how to stop running away from difficult conversations. Taking in Shelby's firm countenance, Rachel slumped her shoulders and plopped back down next to her in defeat.

Glancing at her stubborn child, Shelby paused for a moment to strategize.

"Where were you earlier, Rach?" Shelby asked, already knowing the answer from Kim's earlier text.

"At the hospital to visit Kurt and his dad. Mr. Hummel had a heart attack earlier this week, remember?"

"Yes," Shelby nodded seriously. "How is his dad doing?"

"I think he's going to be okay. He woke up from his coma while I was there."

Rachel absentmindedly grabbed Shelby's arm and started playing with the sleeve of her mother's sweater, caressing the ultra-soft fabric. A moment later, Shelby felt Rachel lean towards her. Picking up her daughter's cues, she threw her arm around her shoulder protectively, smiling when her little girl scooted even closer.

"That's good, baby. I'm glad to hear that he'll be alright."

"Me too. I think Kurt was really scared."

"I'm sure," Shelby sympathized. "But his dad is in good hands now with his recovery. He's at a good hospital with good doctors. They took great care of your grandpa there when he was sick."

"Is grandpa okay now?" Rachel questioned, her mind wandering to her run-in with him and her Aunt Kim earlier. She debated briefly about bringing it up but cast it off, it seemed unimportant.

"Yes, he's doing well," Shelby assured. "He still has to take some medicine consistently, eat well, exercise, and manage his stress. He goes to his doctors regularly. And... he also sees a therapist sometimes."

Rachel stopped her fidgeting with her mom's hand and raised her head up, curious brown eyes meeting thoughtful green ones.

"Grandpa does? Really?"

"Yes, really," Shelby proceeded cautiously. "He used to talk to someone regularly. He had a tough battle with the cancer, and he was a warrior through it. But your grandpa—he had a hard time afterwards dealing with life after the fact. It was difficult for him for a while, and eventually we encouraged him to get counseling. I think he found it helpful."

"Oh," the girl whispered while she distractedly ran her fingers along the older woman's arm.

"Do you think that there's something wrong with your grandpa?"

"What? No," Rachel responded quickly with a shake of her head. She frowned suddenly once she started following her mother's logic. "But it's different mom, he was actually sick and he was actually going through stuff. I'm not. I don't know, mom. It just seems kind of embarrassing to me."

"Baby," Shelby paused, gently turning Rachel's head so they were face to face. "People go to psychologists or psychiatrists for the same reason that they go to other doctors—to get better. Taking care of your mental health is _just as important_ as taking care of your physical health. There's nothing wrong with doing both."

"I guess, but I wouldn't even know what to say," Rachel admitted. "Why can't I just talk to you about this?"

"You can, Rach," she assured. "You absolutely can. But I just wonder if it would be helpful for you to have someone to talk to besides me. I may not always know how to help you with your problems or maybe sometimes your problem is with me?"

Rachel sighed and Shelby half-expected her to get up and walk away again. Instead, her daughter curled up closer and rested her head on her shoulder. She waited for a response that never came before deciding to continue.

"And I absolutely do not think that there is anything wrong with you, Rach. I just think that you've been through a lot this past year. Your dads getting divorced, moving, meeting me, and your daddy is leaving soon—those are some really big changes. Overwhelming ones. Me and your dads, baby, we're not encouraging therapy to _fix_ you. You're not broken. We just think that you might benefit from a time and a judgment-free place to discuss everything that you're worrying about or feeling with someone who can help teach you how to navigate through the muddle of emotions I know you're probably experiencing."

Frowning again at being read like a book, Rachel chose to remain silent, still attempting to organize her thoughts.

"I also know you're hurting, Rachel," Shelby added with a heavy heart. "And I love you far too much to allow this pain you are feeling to continue without help."

"How long will I have to go?" Rachel asked curiously. She sat up and tried to move but her mom kept her firmly in position and squeezed her shoulders encouragingly to stay.

"If you're putting in the effort, then as long as you think you need it," Shelby negotiated. "We don't want to force you to do this if this isn't what you really want to do, Rach. We want you to have as much say in this process as possible. This is for you after all."

"What if it doesn't work, mom?" Rachel wondered. The last thing she wants is for this to be another thing for her to fail at.

"We just have to try, baby," Shelby replied. "Think of it this way Rach—even the best on Broadway need vocal coaches to learn new skills, strategies, and musical styles and to help them think about all the different ways they can improve. Therapy is like working with a coach. You can learn skills on how to process everything that you're going through and practice them over and over again until eventually you don't need a coach anymore. Does that make sense?"

"Yes I guess it does," Rachel nodded honestly, slowly warming up to the idea. She was only hesitant about it because she felt like she was being punished. But now that her mom was explaining how it worked and what to expect, it was becoming easier for her to swallow. "I-I think I'll try it."

"Yeah?" Shelby turned sideways to look her kid in the eyes. "I think that's a good decision, Rach. I'm proud of you."

"You are?" The girl tilted her head in confusion.

"Yes, I am," Shelby leaned over and delicately tucked a strand of hair behind her daughter's ear. "We're not asking you to do this because we think you're weak, Rachel. In fact, I think this is going to take a lot of courage, and so I am proud of you for willing to try."

Rachel's lips quirked into a smile and Shelby automatically felt some of the tension ease out of her body. She knew that encouraging her daughter to be open to receiving help was just half the battle, but she also knew that she was prepared to help her through the entire war. More than ever, she was ready to fight for them to learn how to adjust and accept one another in their new lives. But for now, she was content that they were getting back on track.

She relaxed back into the couch and patted Rachel's knee comfortingly.

"Feeling better, honey?"

"Mhmm," Rachel copied her mom's position and melted back into her arms. "Do you feel better?"

"Much better," the mother answered truthfully, feeling like a two-ton weight has just been lifted off of her shoulders. "And since my rehearsal is over, what do you want to do the rest of the night, Rach?"

"Can we go home?"

"Your dad's or mine?" Shelby asked for more elaboration.

"Ours?" Rachel replied without too much thought. "Our home."

Her heart bursting at the new development, Shelby intertwined her fingers with her daughter's and held on with a renewed purpose, a promise to never let go no matter what else came their way.

* * *

 **A/N** : **Anybody else relieved that Shelby and Rachel finally made up? An extremely important part about writing this story for me is trying to make it as realistic and relatable as possible, and that often means including all of the good and the bad, the ups and the downs as S/R navigate this new and equally exciting and complicated relationship, so thank you all again for joining me on this rollercoaster ride!**

 **Next chapter is Rachel's 14th birthday!**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Flashbacks are italicized and woven in throughout this chapter. Enjoy!**

* * *

 _Seven years ago, New York City_

 _As soon as she got to the top of the subway stairs, Shelby pulled her jacket close to her chest and mentally prepared herself for the cold and the crowds._

 _Typically, her routine was to always stop for a moment and soak in the sights and sounds of Times Square, to take in the buzz and the energy of the people and the lights around her. It was a daily reminder to herself to live in the present, appreciate the now, and bask in the fact that her dreams had come true. That she had made it. It was electrifying, and it always gave her that little bit of extra fuel to get through that evening's performance._

 _But she wasn't interested in partaking in her ritual right now. Especially not today._

 _Not when it just reminded her of the cost._

 _Today, she was only concerned with getting to the theater as fast as possible, doing her job to the best of her abilities, and going back home to be alone. She just wanted today to be over._

 _Picking up her pace, she expertly wove her way through the streets filled with families, tourists, and holiday shoppers alike. Even with a distracted mind, she made it to the Gershwin stage door in record time._

" _Woah there Corcoran, where's the fire?" The burly security guard greeted in his thick Jersey accent as he watched the Tony-winner approach in haste._

" _Just want to get out of the cold, Joe," Shelby replied curtly._

" _Alright, well come on in then," he offered, a bit taken aback by the short response from the usually sweet and polite actress. He pushed open the backstage door and beckoned the woman in._

" _But just so you know… those two over there have been waiting for you for more than an hour? Do you want to go and say hi?" He lowered his voice and pointed with his eyes towards the small crowd beginning to form behind the guardrail._

 _Following his gaze, Shelby landed her sight on an older woman and a little girl distractedly having conversation. Normally, she would've stopped and talked with them without hesitation. She loved meeting her fans, and she was always gracious with her time. But she wasn't in the right headspace to indulge anyone, let alone strangers. And she's also made a promise to herself that she would never be anything less than genuine or kind to her fans._

" _No," she decided and sighed heavily. "But I'll sign a Playbill as soon as I get to my dressing room and send it over for you to give to them."_

" _You sure, SC?" He questioned, tilting his head in confusion. Shelby rarely, if ever, said no to meeting fans. She was always the last actress around the stage door at the end of the night. "You still have twenty minutes before call time?"_

" _Yeah sorry, not right now, and can you let them know I'm going straight home after the show. Thanks Joe," Shelby walked away without waiting for a response._

 _She made her way to the call board and scanned the sign-in sheet for her name. Taking a deep breath, she scribbled her initials and felt a pull in her heart as she marked down the date: 12/18._

* * *

 _Present time, Lima_

Opening the door quietly, Shelby tiptoed across Rachel's room and paused momentarily to look over her daughter who was deep in a peaceful slumber. Her heart swelled taking in the sight of her child clutching a stuffed gold star to her chest, her brown head pressed firmly, deeply into her soft, plush pillow. Rachel may be fourteen now, but she'll always be her little girl. Her baby.

Perching herself at the edge of the bed, the mother rubbed her daughter's back gently to get her to wake up.

"Rach?" Shelby whispered, trying to coax the girl to open her eyes. "Honey, it's time to wake up."

Hearing her mom's voice cut through her sleep, Rachel stirred slowly then flipped over a couple seconds later but refused to open her eyes. Even in this state, she knew that it was way too early for her to be waking up.

"Mommy?" She replied, her voice thick with sleep, and effectively turning Shelby into a pile of mush. Rachel called her mom, sometimes mama, but this was a first. "Wh-what's going on?"

Shelby brushed the long, brunette locks away with gentle fingers then pressed loving lips on her forehead.

"Happy birthday, baby," she greeted, fulfilling a fourteen-year-long dream. She grazed her fingers through silky brown locks then peppered her daughter's beautiful face with kisses, completely overwhelmed with pure adoration for her child. "I love you so much, Rach."

Chuckling softly at the affection, Rachel's eyes finally fluttered open and she gave her mom a sleepy smile in response.

"Thanks mom, I love you too," she responded, breaking out into a jaw-cracking yawn. "What time is it?"

"It's only a little after five. But it's time for you to get up, baby. We have somewhere to be."

" _Mom_ ," Rachel whined, snuggling down under the duvet. As much as she loved her birthday, she was not at all interested in being up at this hour. Not when she stayed up so late from her surprise pre-birthday celebration with her mom, Aunt Kim, Frannie, and Quinn the night before. "It's _too_ early and it's Saturday, mommy. Please let me sleep."

"I know, honey. I promise you can sleep in the car," Shelby offered, feeling guilty for disrupting the teenager's rest. "But I need you to wash up, change, and meet me downstairs in ten minutes."

"Mhmm, wash, change, downstairs," Rachel parroted back but didn't make any move to get up, already drifting back to dreamland.

"Alright then," Shelby patted her daughter's leg then rose to her feet, sighing in the process as if she was in great sadness. "Guess I'm just going to have to go to _Chicago_ without you today."

By the time her mother's words registered, Shelby was already walking out the door with a smirk plastered on her face.

"Chicago?!" Rachel exclaimed, throwing the covers off and jumping out of bed in a flash. "We're going to Chicago today?"

"Oh, now the sleeping beauty is awake," Shelby joked as she picked up the two overnight bags she just finished packing. "Good morning, birthday girl."

"What did you say about Chicago, mom?" Rachel questioned, raising a fist to rub the sleep out of her eyes as she stepped out into the hallway.

"Surprise!" Shelby grinned both from the adorable gesture and the excitement bubbling up inside her. "Already got everything you need packed and we can leave as soon as you're ready. Thought we could go on a little road trip and spend the night. What do you think, Rach?"

"What? Really?" Rachel questioned, her face contorting into the perfect mixture of shock and glee. She's been _dying_ to go back for a visit, but her dads have been reluctant, claiming that she needed time to adjust in Lima first before going back and forth. "But what about—"

"Your dad is going to hit the road as soon as he finishes up in the office this morning, and he'll get in right in time for dinner with us and your daddy," Shelby explained, reading her daughter's mind. "We all thought you'd like to visit this weekend, and we figured you'd like to spend some time with your Nana and Gramps tomorrow. But for today, we have brunch plans with your friends, and then I thought that we could just hang out afterwards, maybe you can show me around? I'd love to see the places you've been telling me about or—"

"This is the _best_ surprise ever," Rachel interrupted, immediately closing the distance between them and wrapping her arms around Shelby's neck. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, mom! I'm so excited!"

"Of course," Shelby smiled, dropping the bags in her hands so she can hug her daughter back properly. "Anything for my fourteen-year-old."

" _Mooom_ , you're squeezing me too tight," laughed Rachel.

"Sorry kiddo. I'm just _so_ happy to be with you on your birthday," she released her from the embrace and touched her cheek. "I've missed out on so many of them already, _but_ I am very glad we get to celebrate together now."

"I'm really happy we're together too," Rachel agreed with a full heart. "And I can't wait for us to be together in Chicago! I can't believe it! You're going to love it, mom. I know we're only there for the weekend but I'm going to show you _everything._ And it's also the best time of the year to visit, I love winter and the holidays in the city!"

* * *

" _Shelly-girl. Tell me there's nothing better than New York City during this time of the year," April Rhodes demanded, barging into Shelby's dressing room without knocking then plopped down dramatically on the couch. "The lights! The snow! It's a winter wonderland out there, and it is magical, let me tell ya."_

" _There's nothing better than New York during this time of the year," Shelby confirmed distractedly while she rummaged through her tote bag. "You're here early today."_

" _I know! Proud of me? Even pipin' hot Cup-of-Joe was shocked," the actress laughed as she shed her jacket and made herself comfortable. "He really is a handsome fella, isn't he?"_

" _Can you just ask him out already?" Shelby replied impatiently with her back still turned to the blonde, not breaking from her search._

 _April's forehead creased and lips frowned at the brunette's clipped tone. "What are you looking for? Joe said you were in a hurry earlier?"_

" _Well, Joe should mind his own business," Shelby mumbled under her breath, running a hand through her hair in frustration. She needed to find it. "Hey, have you seen a package for me? It's a manila envelope and I got it yesterday. I was certain I left it here and now I can't find it."_

" _No my lady, I have not, sorry," April said, blue eyes scanning the room quickly. "What's up?"_

 _Shifting in her seat, April felt paper crumple underneath her. She reached down below the pillow she was sitting on and pulled out the missing package triumphantly._

" _Wait, is this it?" She asked, examining the envelope in her hands. "It's from Chicago? Is this from a fan? Let's open it!"_

" _No!" Shelby cried, prying the envelope from the other woman, clutching it to her chest as if it was about to be ripped out of her hands any second, as if anybody who tried would be in the fight of their lives. "It's not from a fan, it's from—old friends."_

" _Okay… sorry. What's going on? And don't tell me it's nothing cause I know you, Shelby," April prompted, sitting up straight to show that she means business. "You've been preoccupied and a little down lately, and it's breakin' my heart cause you know what they say, a happy work wife is a happy life."_

" _I think it's just happy wife, happy life," Shelby chuckled dryly. "But it's nothing AJ, I'm perfectly fine."_

" _Nuh-uh, no ma'am, you're doing it again," April replied sternly, wagging a perfectly manicured finger at the brunette. "And I'm not buying it for a second, Shel. What are best friends for if you can't even tell me what's bothering you? And you better start now because you have exactly eight minutes until Miss Joyce comes in here to turn you green and I am going to turn red unless you start talking."_

 _Taking in the woman's no-nonsense look of steel in her eyes, Shelby sank down next to her in defeat. There weren't that many people in the world that she would concede to, but April Jane Rhodes was definitely one of them. She may be small, but feisty would be an understatement to describe her._

 _A reporter once wrote that April's larger than life personality perfectly balanced Shelby's cool and level headed one, and it's what made them so good at their roles. Shelby had to agree._

 _They had instant chemistry from their first "Wicked" read-through and they've been friends on and off the stage ever since, forming a deep and genuine connection, an unbreakable bond. They were both two small-town girls who made it big and learned how to survive in the city and on the Big White Way. They grew up together. They looked after one another. And they kept each other grounded since their explosive rise to fame and success._

 _Shelby didn't let a lot of people in, it's been difficult for her to, especially after everything, but April and her big heart climbed over all of her walls and sauntered her way in. April was family._

" _It's from Hiram and Leroy," Shelby sighed, handing off the large envelope._

" _What? It's your letter?" April accepted, inspecting the package more closely, weighing it in her hands. "When did you get this? Why haven't you opened it?"_

" _Yesterday, but I forgot it here. I came in early to read it but now I don't know if I can," Shelby admitted, finding herself toeing the line she rarely allowed herself to cross. "It's—today's her birthday."_

" _Oh, Shel," April felt her heart plummet to her stomach, mentally berating herself in the process for forgetting. "I'm so sorry. I didn't realize. How are you doing? Sorry, stupid question. Are you alright?"_

" _I'm fine," Shelby was quick to answer, robotically nodding her head. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to make you feel bad. I am okay. It's not like this is the first birthday I'm missing, it's just, I don't know AJ, she's turning seven today. She's growing up so fast."_

" _And you miss her," April added, placing her arm over Shelby's shoulder and squeezing gently._

" _Every day," Shelby whispered. "More than usual recently."_

" _Why do you think that is?" She prodded cautiously. Shelby seldom brought up the surrogacy and never instigated a conversation about her daughter. April can't comprehend how she's bottling it all inside._

" _I don't know," Shelby answered pensively. She wasn't trying to be cryptic. It's been years. For the most part, she's worked through the guilt and the regret as best as she could. She's taught herself how to survive, how to keep going. But sometimes it just consumed her. Sometimes it just pulled her under, forcing her to confront the hurt that she's buried deep._

" _Shel—"_

" _I don't know," Shelby repeated, turning to face the inquiring woman with a lost and broken expression that instantly made April's heart twist. "I mean, don't get me wrong, AJ. I'm happy. I know I am. I had the best, the most incredible year of my life so far. We're living the dream, right? I'm grateful. I don't take that for granted. But it's just that at every turn, I-I see her. And I just—sometimes I can't breathe because I miss her so much."_

 _A firm believer that hugs are a cure-all, April wrapped her arms around her friend and held her tight protectively before pulling away to make eye contact, her gaze gentle and understanding._

" _I know, Shel. I can't even imagine what that must feel like. I'm sorry," she sympathized. "But Rachel—she's doing great, right? That's what you told me. That she's in a loving home with amazing parents, who give her everything that she needs and more. That's she's happy and thriving. And that's because of you. It's because of you that the Berry's get to be a family, and there has to be some comfort in that, right? Just try to remember that. You don't have to open it now, but I think hearing about how Rachel's doing will help remind you of that. I'll remind you of that. Every day if I have to."_

" _What would I do without you?" Shelby replied after allowing the woman's reassurances to sink in. With a teary smile, she threw her arms around the small woman and sent a silent thank you to the Broadway gods that brought them together._

" _Lord only knows," April laughed, rubbing Shelby's back comfortingly in response. "It'll be okay, Shel. Everything will work out and I truly believe deep in my heart that you and Rachel will be together again one day. But in the meanwhile, you and I are going to do what we do best and put on an extra special show tonight in honor of your little girl's birthday."_

" _Ladies, let's please leave all the drama for the stage," the show's makeup artist, interrupted as she walked into Shelby's dressing room, finding the two stars in a fierce embrace. "And like I tell you every day, Miss Rhodes, I don't see your name on that door. Time for work, you better run along and get your pins in."_

 _April chuckled lightly at the orders then mouthed 'Are you okay?' to Shelby. Eliciting a nod in the affirmative from the brunette, the blonde rose to her feet, "Sorry, Miss Joyce. I'll let ya work your magic and greenify our lady now."_

" _Alright, baby," Miss Joyce waved her off. "You have a good show now."_

" _See you out there, Shelly-girl," April beamed at her co-star, grabbing her hand reassuringly._

" _Wouldn't miss it for the world, AJ," Shelby responded, squeezing the hand back, completing their ritual._

" _Ready whenever you are Shelby," Miss Joyce said while she puttered by the mirror, preparing the makeup to begin the greenifying process._

 _Watching April walk out the door, Shelby inhaled a deep, centering breath and stood to her feet. The show must go on. But eyeing the package on the couch, she picked it up and opened it without another thought. She grabbed the first thing her hand touched and pulled out a printed 4x6 photograph of a six-year-old Rachel sitting on a bench in between two girls who looked her age, all three were in mid-laugher holding ice cream cones in their hands._

 _Her lips curling into a smile, Shelby flipped the picture over and read the expected caption written on the back: June - Rachel enjoying a treat with her best friends Kitty and Marley._

 _Examining the photo one more time, Shelby ingrained the picture of Rachel's bright and carefree expression into her memory._

 _Her baby is happy, and for now, that would be enough._

" _Now I'm ready," Shelby finally replied._

* * *

"Mom, you ready to go?" Rachel turned her attention back to the older woman after breaking from the three-way hug with her childhood friends Kitty Wilde and Marley Rose.

"Whenever you are," Shelby answered while she buttoned up her wool peacoat then adjusted her scarf, sorely wishing that she had dressed warmer for the crisp Chicago weather. "Honey, please zip up, it's freezing out here."

"Mom, I'm fine," Rachel singsonged, flushing red as Shelby stepped in front of her and zipped up her jacket before she could begin to protest.

"I just don't want you to get sick, Rach," Shelby remarked, taking the winter hat the girl asked her to hold on to earlier and pulled it down her head and over her ears. "There."

Kitty and Marley both looked at each other and smirked in amusement at the interaction between the newly reunited mother and daughter. They've both been there with their moms.

"It was so great to finally meet you girls," Shelby smiled kindly at the two teenagers.

"Thank you for the invite and for taking us to breakfast," Marley replied, completely won over by the woman. "Also thanks for answering the millions of questions I had about songwriting and music."

"And all the selfies," Kitty added, still in utter disbelief that her best friend's mom ended up being Broadway royalty. "It was _awesome_ meeting you, Shelby."

"Oh of course, it was my absolute pleasure," Shelby said honestly, thrilled that she seemed to have made a good impression on Rachel's oldest friends. She loved being able to check things off her mom-bucket-list.

"I'm so happy I got to see you guys, I've missed you so much," Rachel cut into the conversation. "But I'm really excited for you both to come visit over winter break!"

"I know girl, same," Kitty replied. "My mom was actually in so much shock when Shelby called to set it up. I think my dad had to restrain her from calling TMZ or something."

"Yeah Rach, I can't wait for you to show us around Lima," Marley agreed. "Still can't believe you had to move there."

"You're telling me, but it's not too bad anymore. It's actually quite charming. My mom and I have been trying local restaurants and shopping at these boutiques. And you'll get to see my dad and my mom's house. Wait until I show you mom's study, it's incredible. Maybe we can also hang out with some of my friends from glee or you can meet my Aunt Kim. You'll love her," Rachel rattled off animatedly.

A rush of warmth surged through Shelby as she listened to her daughter describe her life in Lima in a positive manner. _Their_ life together.

It's only been a short while since they've made amends, but Rachel's seemed to have leapt faithfully into a fresh start, Shelby right along with her. And hearing unprompted validation of their progress made the mother feel like she was on top of the world.

"Why are you smiling like that, mom?" Rachel questioned blithely.

"No reason, babe," Shelby couldn't stop herself from beaming if she tried. "Just happy to be with you, that's all."

"You're so sentimental," Rachel teased with a playful roll of her eyes, but secretly loved her mom's unyielding affection. "You guys didn't hear it from me, but Shelby Corcoran—in reality, just one _huge_ softie."

"Okay, hush now you, unless you want me to show your friends the photos I have of you sleeping with my To—"

"No! Mom!" Rachel squealed, laughing as she covered the woman's mouth with her hand. "Can we _not_ do that please?"

"That's what I thought," Shelby gloated as Rachel removed her hand then turned to face the two thoroughly entertained teenagers. "Alright ladies, it was great meeting you again. And please text Rachel whenever you get home, so we know you got back safe. I'll see you soon."

Accepting another round of thanks and quick hugs from the two girls, she strolled a few feet away to give the tight-knit friends some privacy to say their goodbyes.

Rachel walked over to Shelby a few moments later and linked her arm with her mother's, "Thanks for making that happen, mom. I really needed to see them."

"Anytime, Rach. I know what it's like to be away from and miss your friends," Shelby empathized, thinking of one person in particular. "I'll always do whatever I can to help you keep in touch with them."

Rachel nodded gratefully and gave her mom a sunny smile in response that automatically filled every fiber of Shelby's being with unadulterated love for her kid. She allowed herself a moment to take in the wonder that is her Rachel and couldn't help herself from pulling her close. Sometimes she still couldn't believe that this was her reality now.

"Why are _you_ smiling like that?"

"Just happy to be with you," Rachel mimicked good heartedly, gravitating towards her mother's warmth. "That's all."

Per Rachel's request, they spent the rest of the afternoon exploring her old neighborhood, the girl determined to show her mother every corner of where she spent almost a decade of her life.

They visited the park where Rachel dislocated her shoulder after accepting little Ben Cohen's dare to climb the tallest tree; the community rec center where she took every dance class available, _twice;_ the local library that still had a photo of an elated nine-year-old Rachel displayed as one of the Top Readers; and the candy shop she used to frequent with her dads that allegedly had the _best_ strawberry ice cream on Earth.

Rachel's tour was the ultimate crash course in her daughter's history, and it filled some of the gaps during their years apart. Memory after memory was shared, one right after the other. Memories that were random, embarrassing, silly, some even painful, but above all, happy. Shelby hung onto every word her daughter spoke of her past, causing her heart to wrench in pain and happiness at the same time.

Hearing about Rachel's childhood was always bittersweet, a mixed blessing. There's nothing that Shelby wanted more than to learn every single minute detail of Rachel's life, to know all that's happened to her during the almost fourteen years they were apart; however, doing so meant also being reminded of _everything_ that she's missed. It was a double-edged sword that Shelby often found herself afflicted by.

"Mom, what's wrong?" Rachel asked, concerned after noticing the woman's expression. Shelby's feelings must've somehow filtered onto her face.

"Nothing," Shelby assured, breaking out of her trance. She wanted to be honest with Rachel, but she also needed to find a way to do so without burdening her. The last thing she wanted was to pass her muddled emotions about the surrogacy on to her daughter for her to internalize. It wouldn't be fair.

"Sorry, I just spaced out for a second, but hey. Thank you for showing me around, kiddo. I loved it."

"Did you?" Rachel cracked a small smile. "I'm really glad I got to take you around. I thought you'd like it because you said before you missed so much, and I just wanted to show you."

Shelby halted mid-step, struck again by how thoughtful her daughter was, "Baby, you did all this for me?"

"Yeah," Rachel shrugged nonchalantly. "But also for me too. It was honestly fun visiting all those places, even though it made me miss being here a lot."

"Well thank you for sharing all of that with me, Rach," Shelby said with all the gratitude that she could muster. "It means a lot to me. However it is _your_ birthday, so we should be doing whatever you want to do, kid."

"I did want to do that," Rachel replied truthfully but paused to gather her thoughts. "But also mom? Can I talk to you about something?"

Shelby nodded in confirmation then resumed their trek to the train, she needed to get her kid out of the cold, "Yes, always."

"I was talking to dad the other day, and you know him, he's an even bigger softie than you are," Rachel teased then picked up her pace to match her mom's long strides. "We were talking about my birthday and then he was telling me about when I was born and how you met them and more about the surrogacy."

"Yeah?" Shelby questioned, puzzled where her daughter's rambling thoughts were leading, but didn't break her brisk walk.

"Yeah, and anyway, he was telling me how he and daddy had an extremely difficult time trying to start a family and how you were the _only_ _one_ who answered their ad in the paper and that you didn't judge them but only wanted to help. And he also said that you even paid them back the money they paid you initially? Is that true, mom?"

"Um—yes, that is true," Shelby responded. She's always meant to discuss all of this with her daughter but given everything that's happened recently, the need to dissect the past has taken a backseat.

Spotting the CTA station a block away, she picked up her speed, unaware that Rachel was struggling to keep up.

"Wait mom," Rachel said breathlessly, reaching for her arm then yanked the older brunette back. "Sorry, you're walking too fast. Can you just listen to me for a second, please?"

"Oh, I'm sorry Rach, I didn't realize," Shelby apologized, stopping immediately then turning to give the girl her undivided attention.

"It's okay," Rachel said once they made eye contact. " _Anyway_ , I just wanted to say thank you."

"Hm? For what?"

"For everything," Rachel replied, her voice suddenly soft. This is something that's been weighing on her for the past couple of days and she was anxious now bringing it up, unsure if Shelby even wanted to hear this. But she needed her mom to know that she understood now, that she gets it now, more than ever before.

"For giving me to my dads."

"What? Rach—"

"I sort of get it now," Rachel explained. "Talking to dad about all of that helped me realize something. They gave me a great childhood, which means that you did too, right? Because they wouldn't have me and I wouldn't have them, if it weren't for you. Even walking around earlier made me realize that it was all possible because of you, so I just—I don't know, but I never want you to feel like you missed all those years mom because everything I did and everywhere I went, you did and you went with me."

Shelby's gaze was locked with Rachel's, her heart thundering in her chest throughout the entire monologue. Once it ended, she just stared at her daughter intensely, completely speechless, tears pooling in her emerald eyes hearing the validation that she's craved for so long for the decisions that she's made. Validation from the only person that truly mattered.

"Come here," Shelby urged, pulling her daughter in for a bone-crushing hug. "You don't have to thank me, Rachel. _Ever_. For you, I'd do it a thousand times over."

"I love you mom, I really do," Rachel responded, hugging her mother back with matching strength. "You're the best."

"I know," Shelby winked as she pulled away, earning a laugh from the teenager. "I really love you too. But you help make all of this easy too, Rach. You, my not so little girl anymore, are the best daughter I could've ever asked for."

* * *

" _Shelby!" Marty Walker called after the singer, zigzagging his way through the post-show rush backstage of the Gershwin to catch up with her. "God you walk too fast, but hey. Great show, you make that look so easy. You're the best. Truly."_

" _You have to say that Marty, you're my agent," Shelby replied, hyper-focused on getting back to her dressing room so she can shower and head home as soon as possible. She was exhausted, physically and mentally. Tonight was a taxing show for her, one of those performances where it seemed like she literally left everything she had on the stage._

" _But your friend first," Marty said to his old NYU classmate. "I'm serious though, Shelby. I've seen you do the play like a dozen times now, but you were in top form tonight. I was seriously transported, who were you singing to?"_

" _What's up, Marty?" Shelby diverted as she entered her dressing room. "What do you need?"_

" _Why do you always assume that I need something from you? Maybe I just wanted to enjoy a Saturday night on Broadway? Maybe I just wanted to hang out with my old friend?"_

 _Shelby turned around and her eyebrows quirked up with her lips as she responded suspiciously, "You drag me to the bar whenever you want to hang out, not visit me at work. What do you need?"_

" _Alright, fine," Marty yielded. He can never win against Shelby Corcoran's HBIC glare. "By the way, you do owe me a night out, I still want to introduce you to that guy I've been telling you about. But I did want to talk to you about a few things."_

" _Fine, but you have ten minutes before I get in the shower," Shelby acquiesced while she began the arduous process of getting her makeup and costume off. "Sorry Marty, I've just had a long day and want to get home to rest."_

" _Noted," Marty accepted then handed her a rolled up official "Wicked" show poster and a black sharpie. "I just need you to autograph this. It's for that online charity auction for Broadway Cares. And it's going to someone whose kid wants to be on Broadway too, so can you also write a short message?"_

" _Yeah, of course," Shelby nodded, taking the pen in her hand and a moment to think about what to write. One of the best parts of her job has been the opportunity to be a role model, and she doesn't take it lightly. In fact, recently, she's been thinking more and more about finding opportunities to mentor and maybe even teach aspiring young actors and musicians._

" _Thanks and the second thing is—are you sure you don't want to do that interview with the Lima Chronicle? It's your hometown paper, Shelby. And you're big-time now. They just want to brag a little, and I think we should let them. It'll be good press."_

" _Marty, I already said no to that," Shelby said with an exasperated sigh, not willing to budge on this. Maybe she was being overly cautious but she made a decision early in her career not to take part in any publicity or accept any interview that could jeopardize the Berry men's privacy, Rachel's privacy. And the local reporter from Lima, digging into her background, presumably asking her questions about the past, was just too close for comfort. "I'm sorry, I am not going to change my mind on this. I'm not interested."_

" _Fine, you're the boss," Marty mumbled in equal frustration. His client was blowing up and offers were coming left and right, but Shelby showed no interest in taking advantage of her meteoric rise. Instead, she was always so deliberate and prudent with her career moves, as if she was making decisions with someone else in mind, which confused him endlessly because as far as he knows, she doesn't have a husband or kids, no one to answer to but herself. The budding star was truly an enigma to him._

" _And I still don't know why you won't do that concert in Chicago next month either. Do you have a vendetta against the Midwest or something?"_

" _Yeah, all the corn and the insanely nice people really grind my gears," Shelby retorted, smiling at the man to ease the tension. "But hey, how about this, I'll do that master class at NYU that you've been asking me about. For the freshmen? I don't know if I'll be a great teacher, but I'll try."_

" _Deal!" Marty's face lit up at the offer. He'll take what he can get. "I'll talk to Professor Foster and set it up. And we'll get the student paper to cover it. But thanks Shel, that's all I needed, so I'll let you get ready to go home. I'll call you tomorrow."_

" _Knock-knock," Joe interrupted from out the hallway. "May I come in?"_

" _Sure Joe, Marty was just leaving," Shelby said, waving goodbye to her manager as he walked out the door. "And I'm about to head into the shower, but what's up?"_

" _Okay SC, so don't kill me, but this was April's idea," Joe entered the room with his hands up. He was six foot four and full of muscle but he wasn't going to lie, sometimes Shelby Corcoran intimidated him. "You remember the woman with the little girl waiting for you earlier?"_

" _Joe," Shelby groaned, her patience running dangerously thin. She was drained and her emotions were getting the better of her. "I already told you—"_

" _I know," the security guard interjected. "But before you say anything else, they're right outside. April talked to them before the show and invited them back. She just got done meeting with them and said to swing them by here. I'm sorry Shelby, but they're literally waiting for you. It'll take maybe five minutes? April was pretty adamant about me bringing them over here, and you know how she gets."_

 _Making a mental note to murder the far-too extroverted woman later, Shelby nodded her head begrudgingly, "Fine. But five minutes Joe and then you have to make up some excuse to get them out of here."_

 _Leaving before the woman can change her mind, Joe returned a few seconds later with the two fans in tow, both looking around excitedly at the star's dressing room._

" _Hi! I'm Kate," the older woman greeted and pushed a young girl forward, placing her hands on her shoulders. "And this is my daughter."_

" _Hello, I'm Rachel," the little girl said, waving her hand and offering a smile as bright as the lights on Broadway. "You were so, so, so, so, sooo good!"_

" _Sorry, she's just a little excited," Kate laughed, ruffling the girl's hair playfully. "This was her first show and we've been up since 6 a.m. and waiting around until 5 p.m. because this little one just couldn't wait. But you were terrific. Thank you so much for the Playbill and for taking the time to meet with us. We know you must be busy."_

" _That's alright, it's nice to meet you both," Shelby chuckled softly, endeared by the little girl. She knelt down so she could be at eye level. "So your name's Rachel? How old are you?"_

" _I'm seven."_

" _Yeah?" Shelby replied, swallowing the lump in her throat and blinking away unbidden tears. "That's a fun age. Where are you from?"_

" _Oklahoma," Rachel smiled proudly. "Just like Miss April!"_

" _This is our first trip to New York too," Kate added. "We found out that we actually live in the neighboring town where April Rhodes is from and I think that's why she invited us back. Showing us some good old small town hospitality."_

" _That's great," Shelby said. "I'm from a small town too. I'm from Lima, Ohio. Ever heard of it, Rachel?"_

" _No," Rachel answered, her nose scrunched up in distaste. "But I bet it's not as cool as New York. This city is the best! I can't wait to live here when I'm older or Tulsa! That's a big city too."_

" _Definitely, I hear Tulsa's a booming metropolis," Shelby laughed in response, the tension in her body melting away. Maybe she won't kill April after all. "I see you have some pink glitter on your cheeks. Did Miss April give you some?"_

" _Oh yes!" Rachel nodded excitedly. "And she let me try her tiara on but it was too big on me."_

" _Can I show you something?" Shelby asked, reaching over to grab makeup off the table then turned back to the seven-year-old. "Wanna see how I turn green?"_

" _Yes please!"_

 _Kate and Joe shared a look with each other and smiled watching the interaction between the two. Shelby gently grabbed one of Rachel's hands and held it with the palm faced down then picked up a brush and began applying a light coat of the specially-created green makeup paint very delicately on the girl's skin._

" _There," Shelby said once she covered every inch of the tiny hand and held it up next to her face. "See, pink does look good with green."_

" _I love it!" Rachel exclaimed, completely astonished by the mini-transformation then unexpectedly looped her arms around the singer's neck for a powerful hug. "Thank you sooo much!"_

" _You're very welcome," Shelby said with matching enthusiasm and wrapped her arms around the girl in response. Catching Joe's gaze as she pulled away, he raised his eyebrows and sent her an 'Are you done?' look. Shaking her head no, she stood back up to her full height, "Are you both in a rush? Do you have somewhere to be?"_

" _No, we were just going to head back to our hotel room but I think this one's a little riled up now," Kate replied, trying to keep her jumpy child still._

" _Yeah, it's that theater high," Shelby joked. "But if you give me maybe fifteen minutes to shower and get changed, I can give you guys a tour, show you the stage? Would you be interested?"_

" _Mama, can we?! Please, please, please!" Rachel looked up at her mom with pleading eyes._

" _Yeah that would be incredible," Kate nodded, entirely surprised by the kind and generous offer. "If you're sure you don't mind, we wouldn't want to impose."_

" _No, not at all. I insist," Shelby said honestly, suddenly remembering how good it felt to pay it forward and share the magic of the stage with others. "Joe, maybe you can grab them some passes while I take a quick shower?"_

" _You got it, SC," Joe grinned at the positive turn of events. He knew that Shelby was just off earlier._

 _After the security guard shepherded the mother and daughter out, Shelby paused for a few moments to gather herself. Letting the stress of the day wash away, she rolled her neck and stretched her limbs languidly while releasing a long, drawn out exhale._

" _Feel better?" April crept up from behind, clasping her arms around the brunette._

 _Turning around, Shelby nodded honestly, catching on to her best friend's not-so-hidden agenda, "I do, actually." Her spirit felt lifted, lighter somehow._

" _I know she's not your Rachel," April said, giving her a small smile. "But you are still making a little girl out there very, very happy and in my book, I think that has to count for something. I mean it was either this or tequila."_

" _You know, I'm not opposed to doing both," Shelby laughed heartily. "Thanks, AJ. Seriously. Thank you."_

* * *

"Are you _serious?!"_ Rachel exclaimed with her mouth agape. "Thank you so much! I can't believe it. This is the most amazing present ever."

Not waiting for a response, the girl got up off her seat and walked around the table offering a round of hugs to the three parents.

"You're welcome, princess," Leroy said, accepting the embrace from the thrilled teenager. "I can't wait for you and your mom to visit. We'll have a fantastic time."

"This is amazing, I can't believe I'm going to London," Rachel squealed again as she sat back down. "I thought you were going to come back and visit over spring break, daddy? Not that I'm complaining. I am so excited!"

"Thank your mom," Hiram chortled. "It was her idea. She volunteered as tribute. She's the only one brave enough to travel across the Atlantic with you."

"Hey! I am not that bad," Rachel cried out in defense, trying to fight back the pout that was forming on her face.

"Whatever you say Miss-Travels-With-15-Million-Suitcases because you absolutely _need_ a daytime outfit and a nighttime one _and_ an emergency outfit all for just one day," Hiram responded, crossing his arm and smirking as he slunk back in his chair. "Good luck, Shelbs. The last time we went on vacation, Rachel color-coded an itinerary for us."

"Daaad, stop," Rachel whined in a high tenor. "It's my _birthday,_ you _have_ to be nice to me. It's the law."

"It's okay, baby," Shelby chuckled, patting her arm in consolation. "Your dad's just jealous because he wasn't invited."

"Ouch," Hiram replied, placing his hand over his chest in mock pain. "Don't remind me."

"We'll have a great time," Shelby said, shaking her head at the man's dramatics. "Speaking of which, I have one more present for you, Rach."

Both Hiram and Leroy groaned audibly in response watching Shelby take out what seemed to be her millionth birthday present for their daughter.

"Oh come on, Shelbs," Hiram teased. "Now you're just making us look bad."

"Quiet you two," Shelby ordered jokingly. "I have fourteen birthdays to make up for."

"He's right, Shelby," Leroy said in total amusement. "You're just spoiling Rach at this point."

"Excuse me, I don't mind!" The teenager protested. "Spoil away, mom. I insist."

"Don't get used it to it," Shelby warned then handed Rachel an envelope. "And technically this isn't from me."

Taking the contents out of the card, Rachel's eyes grew wide and bright, "Wait are these tickets for _Columbus Park?!_ Mom, these are sold out for _months_. This is the most popular show on the West End right now and they already have plans for a Broadway transfer. This is—I can't believe it."

"I know, babe," Shelby laughed. She'd never tire of making her kid happy. "Perks of being best friends with the lead. They're from your Aunt April. She's looking forward to meeting you when we're in London."

"This is awesome! I hear she's incredible in it and she just won the Olivier for her role, right?" Rachel said in awe. "She's amazing."

"She is," Shelby agreed. After "Wicked" while Shelby took a step back from the limelight to pursue teaching, April rode her rise fame to her own Tony Award, success on the small screen, and a currently critically-acclaimed run in an original West End production. "You'll love her, Rach. I can't wait for the two of you to meet."

"Oh that actually reminds me," Leroy chimed into the conversation. "I also have one last present for you, Rach."

"You guys planned this didn't you," Hiram accused, pointing his finger at the two, upset that he was coming in last place in the gift-giving competition.

"Here princess," Leroy offered the package. "I found that poster you were looking for while I was packing up my things."

"You did?!" Rachel said excitedly, rolling it out to examine it. "Mom, look! It's from you!"

"What?" Shelby asked in intrigued tone, taking the old, tattered poster in her hands and inspecting it slowly, recognition and confusion registering as she read the message and autograph, _her_ message and _her_ autograph. "Where did you—how did you get this?"

"Oh my god, I remember this," Hiram said, prying the poster away from the woman. "We must've used a third of Rachel's college fund to get this. I think it's from an online auction right, Leroy? We had to donate to that Broadway organization to get it."

"That's right," the other man nodded. "Rachel was seven then and she was _obsessed_ with 'Wicked' and begged us _every_ _single day_ to take her to New York."

"They never did," Rachel pouted, grasping the poster back and clutching it to her chest. "But they did give me this as a late birthday/early Hanukkah and Christmas present. I had it up in my room but then when we moved, it got lost in the shuffle. Thanks so much for finding it, daddy!"

"You're welcome, Rach. I'm glad it wasn't lost," Leroy responded. "But I think you could probably convince your mom to get you a new one now."

"No!" Rachel decided in a tone that rivaled a Coach Corcoran declaration. "I love this one. I've had it forever. See mom, I told you. You've been there with me all the way."

Pure, unadulterated happiness filling her entire heart, Shelby threw her arm over her daughter's shoulder and held her close, "I guess you're right, baby. Happy birthday."

* * *

 **A/N: That's a wrap on Rachel's birthday, but would love to hear what you guys think! Thanks always for reading. Next chapter are the holidays with the Corcorans (and the Fabrays).**


	17. Chapter 17

"Ugh, I think I'm going to be sick," Quinn groaned deeply, slinking down on the couch next to Rachel.

Rotating her head sideways to inspect her friend, Rachel frowned taking in Quinn's noticeably unsettled appearance. "What's wrong?"

Wordlessly, Quinn pointed across the room to the sight of Frannie and Will cuddled down on the love seat, whispering to each other, seemingly oblivious to the world around them.

"That," Quinn said with a grimace and circled the treachery happening before her very eyes with an outstretched finger. " _That_ is what's wrong."

"I don't know, I think it's kind of cute," Rachel replied neutrally and in the same moment watched the infatuated couple exchange a quick kiss, the affection earning a gag of disgust from Quinn. "Yup. Never mind, that is quite unpleasant."

"Try _extremely_ unpleasant," Quinn shuddered and swallowed back the distaste in her mouth, picking up a throw pillow and handing it to Rachel. "Here. Just end it now for me, please."

"What did you say last week about me being the most over dramatic person that you know?" Rachel asked wryly, using air quotes around the adjective.

Peeling her eyes away from the disturbing scene, Quinn shifted her entire body and leaned back against the sofa arm to face Rachel. "It still stands, but what's up with you? I haven't seen you in forever. How was your Christmas? Hanukkah?"

"My dad and I celebrated Hanukkah before the break," Rachel responded, distractedly grazing her fingers across the velvet pillow. "But I spent Christmas here with my mom. It was good, I think."

Rachel might even go so far to call it a success, but she really only has the Thanksgiving Tragedy, as she's dubbed it, to compare it to. Admittedly, it's still difficult for her to wrap her head around the fact that she now had an entirely new family in her life, one that she didn't even know existed a few months ago. But, she pushed the anxiety down, put her best foot forward, and plastered on her trusty show face, determined not to ruin another holiday for her parents, her mother especially.

However, she soon realized that she didn't have to pretend. Or work too hard to feel comfortable. She had a genuinely pleasant time with her mom's family and loved meeting her grandma, uncle, and little cousins. They were as fun and as weird as her Aunt Kim, as kind and warm as her grandpa, as loving as her mom. It shouldn't have surprised her how quickly she got attached. It was easy. Easy in a way where it felt like she's known them her whole life. That the years apart never existed. And after being together with everybody, the more she wishes it hadn't.

"When's your dad leaving for London again?" Quinn asked, jarring Rachel's thoughts.

Rachel exhaled a drawn-out sigh and smoothed out the invisible wrinkles on her skirt before answering, "Early tomorrow. We spent the night in Chicago yesterday and finished sorting out all of his stuff this morning. It was seriously depressing. I feel like all we've done the past year is pack up and move."

"Well then, I hope this next year brings you many long and boring days in Lima," Quinn smirked.

"Yeah, gee, thanks," Rachel laughed, grabbing the pillow and smacking it against the blonde. "But I'd honestly take it at this point."

"Hey," Quinn sat up, inched closer to Rachel, and lowered her voice, "Did you talk to your mom about tonight?"

"I didn't even try," Rachel whispered, shaking her head in the negative. "I realize that you may be under the false impression that my mother is cool; but trust me, she's like a million times stricter than either of my dads. She'd probably even ground me just for asking. Did you talk to your parents?"

"No," Quinn sighed with a slump of her shoulders. "Because same. But it's so unfair, Fran went out all the time when she was in high school. And Santana just texted me, they're all going."

"It doesn't even sound that fun," Rachel replied in an uninterested tone. "Besides, Puck just wants to get everybody together so they can all hook up and get drunk."

"Exactly, there's a word for that, a _party_ ," Quinn responded, rolling hazel eyes. "Don't take this the wrong way Rach, but sometimes you can be a total bore. You know what you actually need more of this year? Fun. And friends. You need to learn how to live it up."

"How do you do that? How do you manage to sneak in an insult in almost every single conversation we have?" Rachel snarled, but found herself somewhat agreeing with Quinn's points.

All she's done recently is focus on glee club and the never-ending family things that came up. She knew that the New Directions were warming up to her, but at the end of the day, she did still feel like the new kid, slightly uncomfortable, and still trying to find her place. If she were being honest, she could put in more effort. She could probably fixate less on how well her teammates were singing and more on how well they were actually doing. She knows she should work harder to foster her relationships; if nothing else, but to help build a more cohesive and connected team.

"Fine, but even if we did go, how do we get past all of this?" Rachel questioned, gesturing to the living room and kitchen full of their families, who were all currently over at her grandparents' house to ring in the New Year. "There's no way our moms will let us go. Noah's parents aren't going to be there."

Not to mention the fact that her mother has been… _hovering_ recently. Rachel's not entirely sure why, but Shelby hasn't let her out of her sight and has been intensely preoccupied with, well, _her_ as of late.

"Valid point," Quinn conceded. She wanted to go the party, but not enough to condemn herself to a death wish. The Judy Fabray and Shelby Corcoran barrier was not one she was willing nor brave enough to cross just yet. "I still wish we could go. We're literally going to be the only ones not there."

"What are you two whispering about?" Kim narrowed her eyes at the two suspiciously while she approached the couch with a half-asleep five-year-old hoisted on her hip.

"Rae-Rae," Lily murmured, shifting away from the woman and lifting her arms up to go to her older cousin.

"Hey Lil," Rachel smiled warmly, accepting the toddler then settled her down on her lap. "Why are you so tired? It's only 7:00, you know you have to stay up until midnight with us."

"Because, Miss Lily here _refused_ to take a nap with her brother earlier," Kim answered with a raised eyebrow at the stubborn little girl. "Even though I told her that she's going to be tired for tonight."

"M'sleepy Rae," Lily yawned, snuggling against the teenager. "Can we watch 'Funny Girl' again?"

"No you did not," Quinn gaped incredulously at Rachel. "Please tell me that you did not make two _five-year-old_ s watch a boring, old singing movie. Are they even old enough to understand that?"

"Well I certainly was not about to watch 'The Secret Life of Pets' when Streisand was available," Rachel huffed in disdain. "Besides, they loved it. Isn't that right, Lil?"

"Mhmm," Lily nodded her head in solidarity. "We make mommy play Rain Parade all the time."

"Yes, thank you _so much_ for that, by the way," Kim said, plopping down on the arm chair opposite the girls. "Brian and I haven't been able to listen to anything else in the car this past week cause they keep asking to listen to it over and _over_ again."

"It's not my fault that you and Uncle Brian allowed them to live through five years on this Earth without introducing them to Babs," Rachel said in complete disbelief. " _Especially_ mom! And she has the audacity to call herself a Broadway star _and_ a music teacher, no less."

"I call myself what now, Rach?" Shelby cut into the conversation, walking over with board games in one hand and Robby in the other. A smile automatically bloomed across her face at the sight of her niece with her daughter, beyond thrilled that Rachel adopted the role of being a big cousin so easily and so willingly.

"I'm just saying that there's been some highly questionable parenting choices in this family," Rachel accused, wrapping her arms around the little girl on her lap protectively. "But it's okay, because Lily and Robby have me now to introduce them to the most talented and prolific entertainers of the modern era."

"Yep," Lily confirmed, not quite sure what she was agreeing to since her older cousin seemed to talk a lot, but she really liked her anyway. "Happy you're here, Rae-Rae."

"Me too!" Robby chimed in, flashing a toothy grin. "Will you, pretty please, play Battleship with me, Rae?"

"Oh no, Robby," Quinn warned with a knowing smirk. "If your cousin is _anything_ like your mommy or your Aunt Shelly, then you absolutely do not want to get her started on a board game. They get super competitive."

"Excuse me, we are not that bad," Kim said defensively, but knew that she was standing on shaky ground.

They were infamous for their Corcoran competitive nature. Her sister, especially, was shamelessly ruthless. And she can neither confirm nor deny that while they were growing up, their parents had to eventually keep their board games under lock and key to preserve peace in their home.

"Nope, Q's right," Brian interjected as he joined the group. "You and Shel are _definitely_ that bad. Remember when you didn't talk to each other for two weeks because of a debate over Pictionary strategy. _Pictionary,_ babe _._ "

"Or when Kim sprained her wrist playing Twister," Quinn added with a snicker.

"Okay, whatever, but I did win," Kim boasted, still entirely convinced that the Twister casualty was worth her victory. "I'd like to see any of you try to do that maneuver."

"And don't forget when Shelby put us all on lock down so we could finish an already _four hour_ game of Monopoly!" Frannie yelled from across the room. "She outright refused to let us all go. I haven't been the same since the Shelby Shut-In of '08."

"Oh please," Shelby scoffed in protest as the rest of her family dissolved into laughter. "You're all just jealous because I'm the reigning champ of Game Night. Who holds the winningest record? That's right. Me. Rach, you can probably add Board Game Master to the list of things that I allegedly call myself."

Shrinking in her seat under Shelby's gaze, Rachel gave her a nervous smile in response. "Well, you better watch out mom, because I, too, happen to be a board game pro. Tonight may just be the night you lose your streak."

"Oh-ho, shots fired," Brian said impressed and gave his new niece a high-five in approval. "Mini-Shel did not come to play around."

"Oh my money is definitely on Rachel… to lose _so badly_ to Shelby," Quinn declared, earning an elbow jab from the brunette.

"Alright, alright, that's enough smack talk over there," Robert's voice boomed over his family's raucous jeering, whistling the room into silence. "Everybody get over here and let's get New Year's Eve Game Night started!"

* * *

"Quinn," Rachel hissed as she trailed after the blonde swiftly making her way through the snow-covered yard.

"Quinn, there's a cop car right there. Are we going to get arrested? Because I know I'm tough and all but I don't exactly think that I'm _prison_ -material."

"Berry, get a grip," Quinn pleaded, eyeing the idle police car parked on the street corner outside of her house. "Noah's is just a couple blocks that way, so we have to walk past it, okay? We're not doing anything illegal. Just be cool. I'm begging you."

Rooted to her spot on the sidewalk, Rachel wrung her hands apprehensively, swinging her gaze from the brightness inside of her grandparents' house to the glaring light emanating from the Lima Police Department vehicle. An omen, she's certain of it.

"What's wrong?" Quinn halted her steps, turning to face Rachel who was visibly shivering underneath the dim glow of the streetlight. "You wanted to go, right?"

"Yeah, yes," Rachel nodded her head fervently in an attempt to physically shake off the nerves. "Sorry. It's just—"

"What, Rach? Do you want to go back?"

"No, it's—I still just cannot believe that we lost," Rachel said in a half-whisper, her voice dripping with disappointment. "I usually _rock_ at Taboo. But it's like my mother has X-ray vision and can see through the cards. How does she do it? Quinn. Tell me."

"And I can't believe that we're literally in the middle of sneaking out right now and you're _still_ thinking about that!" Quinn exclaimed, wrapping her thin cardigan around her body then spun around to resume their getaway. "I told you. There is no winning against Shelby. I've been watching Kim and Fran try for _years._ "

"Right," Rachel said, watching her breath materialize in the crisp air then hustled to follow the irate cheerleader across the street. "You know, she's going to kill me, _kill us,_ if they find out we snuck out. And we look weird. We don't have our coats on. This cop's going to say something for sure. Oh God. We're dead. Quinn, I'm not sure they allow ex-convicts to audition for Broadway shows."

"They're not going to find out," Quinn seethed, doing her best to act normal while they walked past the police car. "It's only 9:00 and we'll be back by 11:30 the latest for the countdown. And stop freaking out! You're freaking me out. Also for the record, was this not _your_ idea like twenty minutes ago?"

Rachel squared her shoulders, straightened her spine, and held her head high following behind Quinn. If she was going to go down, she might as well do it with poise. She made eye contact with the officer behind the wheel who tipped his head slightly in acknowledgement and gave her a polite smile. She swallowed thickly and forced herself to smile back, which she's certain came out as more of a pained grimace.

She'll be the first to admit that perhaps she had not thought things through when she pitched the escape plan to Puck's party, but it sounded pretty good in the moment to her. It's not that she was dying to get away from her family; truthfully, she was having a great time with them, but she also needed a breather and some space from all the attention. Most of all, she just needed a more effective distraction.

"I'm sorry," Rachel whispered, even though there was absolutely no else outside to hear them. She's just convinced that her mother has an innate, super-human sense of hearing, so she couldn't be too cautious. "Call it escapee's remorse. I think I might've blacked out when I suggested this."

"Shut up," Quinn laughed, not breaking her purposeful strides. "Let's just check it out. San texted me that everyone's already there. We can just make an appearance and head back before anyone notices."

* * *

After tucking in the twins for the night, Shelby quietly shut the door to the guest room behind her and turned to face her sister, pausing for a second before asking, "Kim? Do you think Rachel's okay?"

"Shelly," Kim lifted an eyebrow at her older sister. "You're doing it."

"Doing what?" Shelby asked for more elaboration while she followed the younger woman down the hallway.

"You're hovering," Kim replied as-a-matter-of-factly.

Shelby balked at the accusation. "What are you talking about?"

"You're hovering," Kim repeated, spinning around to face Shelby's thoroughly confused expression. "You're fixating. On your daughter. Rachel's fine. She's a teenager and she just wants to do her own thing. You remember what that's like. Besides, they're only next door and Rae's probably just forcing Q to watch another musical."

"No. That's not it," Shelby said, shaking her head. "I get that. It's—she didn't seem off to you after mom and Judy began talking to her about London?"

Kim paused to gather her thoughts for a moment and attempted to recall any weirdness from her niece earlier. "I don't know, maybe she seemed quieter? But that could've been anything, Shelly. You're worrying too much."

"Maybe, but can you blame me?" Shelby sighed, a faraway look in her eyes. "Leroy's _actually_ leaving tomorrow and I'm just concerned about her reaction or honestly lack-thereof right now. She doesn't necessarily have the best track record of dealing when things get overwhelming for her. She might seem fine, but I know her Kim, and she bottles things up and internalizes too much and—"

"Shelly, I know," Kim interrupted, placing a calming hand on her shoulder and gently squeezing to rein in the new mother. "But you've talked to her, right? She knows to come to you. You've made it more than clear that you're here for her if she needs anything. So just trust that she knows that and stop worrying because all you're going to do is stress yourself out and Rachel will feed off that. Just be cool, mama."

"But that's way easier said than done," Shelby practically whined, which amused the younger Corcoran endlessly. In Kim's eyes, her older sister was good at _everything_. She rarely saw Shelby in situations where she was unassured, lacking confidence. They were few and far between.

"Just please tell me that this gets any easier?" Shelby pouted, her face falling.

"Being a parent? No, absolutely not," Kim chuckled sympathetically. "And mom and dad tell me that the worrying only gets worse."

"Fantastic," Shelby replied. "I don't know how you do this, especially when you have two of them."

"Oh, a _ton_ of trial and error and an unhealthy amount of caffeine," Kim answered. "Also Brian. He's a rock star and constantly talks me off the ledge. And I will gladly do the same for you any time, any place, big sis."

Without waiting for a reply, Kim took Shelby's hand in hers and led her down the hallway and into her old bedroom, still, for the most part, untouched since she moved out for college years ago.

Kim stopped in front of the window, opened up the blinds then tapped the glass, pointing to the window at the Fabray house directly across the side-yard.

"Look. The lights are on in Q's room and I think I can even hear music," Kim moved to allow her sister to observe. "They're fine. And if you're really worried, we can make up an excuse and check on them later."

Bending down slightly to peer through the frost-covered glass, Shelby let out a small laugh."This is kind of creepy," she pointed out.

"Not when that used to be Frannie's old room. Then it was just _awesome_. How do you think we were able to talk to each other even when we were grounded? Constantly. By mom and Judy."

"Yeah, well, you guys were such delinquents," Shelby teased, twisting the blinds close and making her way out the room. She's not about to get caught spying on her daughter.

"Maybe compared to you," Kim said with an impish grin. "You were such a square. You _never_ got in trouble with mom and dad."

"Or maybe I just _never_ got caught," Shelby shrugged, causing Kim to stop dead in her tracks.

"What?" The younger Corcoran gaped. "What do you mean you never got caught, Shelly?"

Shelby smirked at the incredulous look taking over her little sister's face and suddenly felt sixteen again, swapping trade secrets on how to elude their parent's wrath. "Well… it may or may not be possible that while you and Frannie were communicating via Morse code through your bedroom windows that perhaps I was sneaking out through the basement window that mom told dad to bolt shut but never did."

"Oh my god," Kim breathed, brown eyes widening at the admission and filling with betrayal at the fact that her entire teenage life has been a _lie_.

"You got away with it for _years!_ This is so incredibly unfair, Shelly. Why didn't you tell me? You just let me get in trouble when you had a patented way of getting to do whatever you wanted!"

"Because you would've told Frannie and gotten caught anyway!" Shelby replied in matching fervor. "You two are _the worst_ and _so obvious_ and then I wouldn't have had an escape route anymore! And I honestly didn't do it all the time, just when desperate times called for desperate measures."

"I can't even look at you right now," Kim said, shaking her head in sincere shock. "Mom and dad lectured me incessantly about being more like you, _Miss Perfect_ , and this entire time you were doing the same thing as I was! And you have the _nerve_ to call yourself a big sister!"

"Alright, someone's been hanging around my kid too much," Shelby laughed then raised her hands up in fake surrender. "I'm _sorry_ , Kim. I am. But you must understand, I had to err on the side of caution. Self-preservation and all."

"You are unbelievable," Kim glared, poking Shelby's chest with an accusatory finger. "And I'm telling mom!"

"Kimmie! Get back here right now!" Shelby yelled after her scorned sibling went barreling down the stairs at lightning speed.

* * *

By the time Rachel and Quinn arrived, the illicit New Year's Eve party was in full swing. Scores of McKinley High students were scattered throughout the house and a playlist of pop music blared from the speakers, dampening the sounds of drunken conversation and raucous laughter.

In true Puck-fashion, what was initially supposed to be a group hang for the New Directions, predictably morphed into an all-out rager. Quinn was right, all of the glee kids were accounted for, but there was also a surprisingly large number of upperclassmen, Cheerios, and jocks in attendance.

"What's up my hot, little Jewish-American-Princess?" Puck greeted with a lazy smirk, pulling Rachel into an unexpected side-hug. "Welcome to Casa-A-La-Puck. Didn't think you'd be able to join us this evening."

"This wasn't necessarily my plan," Rachel replied, surveying the scene in front of her. The clock had yet to strike midnight, and already the majority of party guests were exceptionally inebriated.

Artie was doing wheelies up and down the hallway, eliciting impressed cheering from Mike and Matt. A crowd was forming around Santana and Brittany who were dancing dangerously close, swaying their hips rhythmically to the beat of the music. Kurt, Tina, and Mercedes were sprawled across the couch talking animatedly in between fits of giggles. And Finn was in the midst of a rowdy, trash-talking game of Quarters. The only person missing was Quinn, who ran off the moment they entered the house party.

"But this is quite a shindig you've put together, Puckerman."

"I know right?" Puck agreed, marveling at the drunken revelry in all its glory and took another swig from his Solo cup. "Glad you could partake in the fun, Berry. May I offer you a drink?"

"Uh—no thanks," Rachel replied hastily. "I'm not staying long. Quinn and I are actually supposed to be at my grandparents' house with our families. We just came to check it out but should probably get back soon."

"Oh shit," Puck tittered, nodding his head in full support. "You guys snuck out to be here? Badass, Rachel. Maybe you're less of a square than I thought. But you sure I can't get you a drink? I made some Puckerman Punch. It's my specialty. We also have some wine coolers in the fridge and somebody brought the beer ball, it's a mini-keg."

Rachel scrunched up her nose at the offers. It's one thing to push her luck with the unapproved excursion, but it's another to even entertain the idea of underage drinking, even though everyone around her seemed to have no qualms about it. She's not quite ready to up the ante yet. "No, because I truly think that my mother will murder me if she even smells any sort alcohol on me."

"Alright, suit yourself," Puck relented. "I just want you to loosen up, Berry. I think it'd do you and honestly all of us a world of good. You're always wound up so tight and you've been so stressed out recently about Sectionals."

"Regionals," Rachel corrected with a grin. Misguided as it may be, she was somewhat touched by the concern. At least they were past the days of him and Santana carelessly pawning her off to their competition.

"That's what I said," Puck shrugged then guzzled down the rest of his drink. "Alright, I'm out. I am going to refill, but make yourself comfortable. Just promise me dude, no show tunes if you somehow get a hold of the playlist."

Watching Puck's mohawk disappear into a swarm of bodies, Rachel stood around awkwardly for the next few seconds, unsure of what to do next. This was her first ever high school party, and she probably couldn't feel more out of place if she tried.

"Diva!" Kurt's call captured her attention. She turned around instantly and met his, Mercedes, and Tina's smiling faces waving her down to come over. Breathing a sigh of relief, she made a beeline for the couch and was immediately engulfed into a bone-crushing hug.

"Barbra, you made it," Kurt slurred, his embrace fierce. "I'm so happy you're here. I was just telling Tina and Mercedes about how you said you'd think about letting me do a makeover for you. _Please_ let me, you know a good makeover is like crack to me."

"Hi there Kurt," Rachel laughed in amusement. "I see you've had something to drink."

"He's had like three somethings to drink," Mercedes replied, holding up and wiggling four fingers. "And so have we. Where's your Puckasaurus Punch, lady?"

"Not tonight," Rachel evaded then settled in the vacant spot on the couch once Kurt released her. "I'm actually supposed to be with my mom. Quinn and I just came by to say hi to everyone. Have you seen her by the way?"

"I saw her grab Finn a couple minutes ago and they went upstairs," Tina answered, drawing a chorus of intrigued sounds from the three divas.

"I told you, Kurt!" Mercedes said, her voice full of vindication. "Did I not say that they were acting all weird and suspicious at the Lima Bean the other day? Who knew it was because they're getting down and freaky!"

"Well is anyone surprised?" Kurt asked rhetorically as he crossed his legs, leaned back, and sipped his drink. "He's the quarterback and she's going to be the head cheerleader. It's written in the cliched high school stars. It's their destiny."

"What do the stars say about us?" Tina inquired.

"We are in glee club, Tina," Kurt answered. "That means we are the bottom of the social heap. The chess team will get more play than we will."

"Only until we win at Regionals," Rachel responded with a determined nod. "Being great at something is going to change that. Being a part of something special will make us special."

"Except you forgot that we have to compete against _your_ mother and _her_ team first to get there," Mercedes pointed out. "Vocal Adrenaline is no joke, y'all."

"Rachel, is it true that they're required to use sunblock when they rehearse because their spotlights are so bright?" Tina questioned. "Or that they practice from 2:30 to midnight every single day? And for 24 hours straight before every competition? When do you get to see your mom?"

Rachel furrowed her brows at the absurd line of questioning. She really has to talk to her mom about Vocal Adrenaline PR. The rumors were getting out-of-hand.

"We're screwed," Kurt decided, swallowing back the rest of his mixed drink.

"What? No we're not," Rachel argued. "VA is good but we're not a joke either. I really think that if we just double down, take things more seriously, and—"

"Nuh-uh, stop right there," Mercedes cut off the self-anointed team leader. "Tonight is not the time to talk business. Nope. Rachel, I promise you that you can bore us all to death with the details on how to take-down VA when we get back from break. But tonight—tonight we dance."

Rising to her feet, Mercedes tugged on Rachel's hand and led her out to the makeshift dance floor, calling after Tina and Kurt to follow. Once there, they spotted Brittany and Mike who both sauntered their way to join them.

"We can worry about glee tomorrow, but let's just have fun for now," Mercedes said over the music blasting. "Just chill Rach, and shake what your mama gave ya."

After hearing it for the millionth time that night, Rachel finally allowed herself to listen to the advice. She briefly glanced at her phone to keep the time and felt her heart constrict at the missed text and call but pushed it down immediately.

She looked back up at her friends who were trying to get their dance on but were flailing around drunkenly more than anything else. Their goofy smiles and carefree attitudes were contagious, and she found herself leaning in to it as she joined the growing dance circle.

She came here to have fun. And that's exactly what she was going to do.

* * *

For the most part, Will Schuester considered himself a confident man. He was a performer and a teacher. He knew how to carry himself in front of crowds. He can handle his share of unruly teenagers. Heck, he even went toe-to-toe with Sue Sylvester on the daily. There wasn't a lot that genuinely made him nervous. But sitting alone in the Corcoran's home office, no witnesses in sight, with his new girlfriend's best friend, he began to get a rather sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach.

After a few moments of thick, uncomfortable silence, Kim slowly spun the office chair around, her fingers steepled underneath her chin, and narrowed her gaze at the man in question suspiciously.

"So, William Michael Schuester," Kim stated, her tone firm, her face somber.

With an audible gulp, Will attempted to control the pounding in his chest. Oh yes. This was one of the rare occasions where he found himself surprisingly on edge. "Um...yes, Kim...berly? Jennings-Corcoran?"

Uncrossing her legs, Kim proceeded to get up from the chair and walked in front of the oak desk then peered down at Will with a stone-face expression, quite pleased at how squirmy he looked. Now she understands why her sister gets off on these power trips.

"I have one question for you and know that there is a right answer," Kim responded, speaking slowly and evenly. "What are your intentions with my Frannie?"

Kim maintained a rigid stance in front of Will and allowed him a moment to organize his thoughts. Once he stopped fidgeting, she couldn't help but ask, "And also, why is your hair so big and curly? Is it because it's full of secrets?"

"His intentions are to take advantage of me, which I am more than willing to allow. And excuse you, I find his hair extremely adorable," Frannie answered as she walked into the room, bottle of wine in hand, and perched herself on Will's lap.

"Oh, come on!" Kim whined passionately, throwing her hands up in the air. "You just ruined my entire interrogation!"

"Rule number one of a shake-down, little sis, is to close the door behind you, so that it makes it harder for them to escape," Shelby advised while she also entered the dimly-lit office space, probably so for the dramatic effect. "You have much to learn on the art of the scare."

"Aw man," Kim pouted, breaking out of her facade. "I really thought I was doing well there for a second. I seriously need to get this down before the twins are teenagers."

"For what it's worth, I was a bit intimidated," Will offered, actually feeling immensely relieved at the turn of events. "You were almost as frightening as your sister. No offense, Shelby."

"Not possible." "Cool!" Shelby and Kim replied at the same time.

Kim grabbed the bottle of wine from Frannie and began to refill the empty glasses on the desk. "More wine for everyone?"

Will and Frannie nodded their heads in confirmation but Shelby shook her head in objection. "No thanks, I've already had three and I definitely need to sober up so I can drive Rach and I home later. We need to be at the airport very early tomorrow morning."

"Well, there's no way mom's going to let you drive home now. The kids are already asleep and I don't want to wake them, so we can all just sleep over," Kim problem-solved, already done pouring another glass for Shelby.

Her sister rarely drank more than the one glass of wine with dinner, if that, and the fact that she's not vehemently protesting a fourth, is a wildly exciting idea to Kim. The prospect of a drunk Shelby made her more giddy than she can probably express. She shared a brief, knowing look with Frannie, who understood exactly what she was getting at.

"Yeah Shel, have just another drink with us," Frannie urged, taking her glass and handing the other to Will. "It's New Year's Eve. We're celebrating the end of an awesome, kick-ass year for all of us. And the beginning of another one with all of the new amazing people in our lives. It's going to be great."

"Are you really using my reunion with my daughter as leverage to encourage me to drink some more right now?" Shelby asked, seeing right through their transparent plan. She doesn't know why the dynamic duo think that they can ever get anything past her.

Still, she already felt refreshingly loose and a tad bit invincible. It couldn't hurt to lean into the euphoria.

"Because I think it's probably working."

Breaking into a impossibly wide grin, Kim raised her glass victoriously for a toast, "To Rachel."

"To Rachel," the room echoed with cheers.

* * *

At Puck's, Rachel lost track of how long she's been dancing and essentially scream-singing along to the music with the glee kids. She was still avoiding the alcohol that was flowing freely, but she was having a perfectly good time enjoying the spectacle her friends made in their various degrees of drunkenness. Despite the sobriety, she felt relaxed and uninhibited from the endorphins rushing through her body. She can't even remember the last time she danced or even sang just for fun, but it was proving to be an excellent distraction and was effectively washing her worries away.

As the night wore on, it seemed as though the entire student population had come to partake in the festivities. For the most part, the glee kids closed ranks and were content with entertaining one another. Every once in a while, Karofsky and his jock cronies would drunkenly jeer and throw ignorant taunts their way, but Puck did his best to maintain the peace between the clashing cliques.

Eventually, Rachel pleaded fatigue and decided she needed to find a drink. She looked over at the beverage counter and found Santana staring intently at her. Feeling braver than usual, she walked over to the cheerleader and offered a bright smile as a peace offering.

"Hey Santana, how's your night going?"

"Good," Santana responded shortly. "Yours?"

"Good," Rachel seconded, opening a water bottle and bringing it up to her lips. An awkwardness settled heavily in between them, and Rachel sighed realizing that her company was not likely to humor her. "Okay well—"

"I'm surprised you're here," Santana said. "Where's Q at?"

"Honestly, same, but I'm having fun," Rachel shrugged. "And I haven't seen Quinn in a while, but I should probably find her. It's past 11:00 and we have to get back to my grandparents'."

"Oh, right. How's that mama drama going, Rachel?"

"Wow, did you just call me by my first name?" Rachel asked in a disbelieving manner. "Did not think you were capable of that."

"Yes, so what?" Santana replied, annoyed by Rachel's tone. "Do you prefer Yentl? RuPaul? That Thing?"

"Why do you hate me?" Rachel demanded. As far as she's aware, she hasn't said or done anything wrong to offend the popular cheerleader, so she doesn't understand where the unreasonable amount of ire is coming from. She was so sick of it.

"Oh I don't hate you," Santana said seriously. "I just don't know you. You're just this girl who showed up from out of nowhere acting like you're better than all of us with your perfect little life and celebrity mom, and suddenly you're bossing everyone around and always hanging around my best friends."

"What?" Rachel scoffed. "You think my life is perfect?" Triggered by the unwarranted judgment, she felt her anger rise spectacularly. She opened and closed her mouth a few times as she gathered her thoughts but found herself feeling more and more agitated by the unfair assessment of her life. She's been through so much; hell, she _is_ going through so much, in the past year. And she'd be damned if she let anyone say it was "perfect" or otherwise and treat her differently for it.

"My two dads lied to me," Rachel huffed out an exasperated breath then began to set the record straight. "For, I don't know, probably years, about their marriage. About how happy they were, how happy _we_ were. About who my mom was. Then, they decided they didn't want to lie anymore and blew my life apart and moved me here where I'm constantly judged and belittled by people who don't understand who I am or what they're talking about. And on top of that, one of them decided that they're just absolutely okay with moving thousands of miles away from me without ever really asking me how I felt about it. So I'm not really sure where _perfect_ fits in any of that, Santana, but that's certainly not how I would describe my life at the moment. Also just so we're clear, I only _boss_ everyone around in glee because nobody takes it as seriously as I do. You all complain about sucking and then nobody wants to put in any work!"

Around them, the party raged on, but Rachel and Santana were caught in an intense staring match after the fiery profession. Rachel's chest rose up and down at the verbal expulsion of all her current stress. The two of them stood in silence for another full minute, before Santana, who was starting to wear a regretful expression, broke it.

"Rachel, I'm—"

"I don't need your pity, Santana," Rachel sighed with an imperceptible shake of her heard. This is _not_ what she came here for tonight. "I just want you to cut me some slack."

"Okay," Santana said simply.

"Okay, what?"

"Okay, hobbit?" Santana smirked, softening her features. "You still annoy me, but I'm—yeah, I am sorry about all the shit that's going on with your dads. That's, like, real heavy, so I guess I can cool it. But that still doesn't mean—"

"That we're friends," Rachel completed the sentence, rolling her eyes. "Yeah, whatever. Fine with me, Satan."

"Sanny, Rachel, come back and dance!" Brittany's cheerful voice cut into the tension. The blonde beckoned them back to join the group on the dance floor that now included Quinn and Finn.

Before she could decline, Santana grabbed her arm and yanked her towards everybody. "Let's go, Rachel. Come dance your little midget legs off some more."

Pleasantly surprised and only slightly offended by the invitation, Rachel made a split-second decision to cast her worries away. That was tomorrow's problem. Tonight, following Mercedes' advice, she only wanted to dance.

* * *

"And in conclusion, that is why I believe that Shelby Marie Corcoran owes me, Kimberly Reese Jennings-Corcoran, reparations for the injustice that was done to me, and also Frannie by association, during our teenage years," Kim bowed to the round of applause from her audience sitting on the family room couch.

"I owe you nothing," Shelby maintained, polishing off another glass of wine, her last one she decided since every single nerve inside of her felt acutely warm and tingly. "It's not my fault that I was way more creative than you were with mom and dad's rules."

"That may be so, but you could have _shared_ the knowledge with me is my point," Kim, who appeared slightly unsteady on her feet, argued. "That's what big sisters are for."

"Uh, no," Shelby countered. "I was not about to share methods for you to go and get in more trouble and have who knows what happen to you and for that to be on my conscience. No ma'am. As a big sister, I am supposed to look out for you."

"I have to agree with Shel here," Frannie spoke up, ignoring the look of betrayal directed her way. "There's no way I'd indulge Quinnie. That girl knows how to find trouble on her own."

"I cannot believe that you all left me to play Scrabble with your parents, while you're all in here hiding so you can drink!" Brian cried foul as he entered the den. "You. Guys. Owe. Me."

He threw a cell phone to Shelby and then sniped the glass of wine from his wife's hand. "Your phone rang twice, Shel. I think you have a missed call from Leroy. And your parents want everybody back in the living room soon for the countdown."

"My hero," Kim gushed, sloppily falling into Brian's arms and ungracefully pushed him down to the couch.

Laughing at the interaction, Shelby turned her attention to her phone and scrolled through her recent messages, confusion registering almost instantly.

 _Leroy: Hey, just called to say goodnight to Rach. Called her a couple times, but no answer. It's ok, figured you both are busy. See u tomorrow._

An unsettled feeling cut into her buzz, and Shelby sobered up slightly. Before she could do anything else, Judy blazed into the room wearing a perfectly irritable expression that only a mother of a misbehaving teenager could muster.

"Shelby, do you know where Rachel is? Because those two little girls are definitely _not_ where they're supposed to be," Judy stated, her hands making its way to her hips. "And Quinn's phone is dead. I just tried calling her."

"They're not at your house?" Shelby inquired, that all-too-familiar dread of not knowing where her child was taking over her senses. She didn't waste a second dialing the teenager's number.

"No, they most definitely are not," Judy replied with a bite in her voice that made all of the adults in the room flinch. They couples all shifted anxiously in their seats and looked at anywhere but Judy Fabray in an attempt to avoid being in her line of fire.

"Russ and Robert said they're not upstairs either," Anne informed, a hint of amusement in her voice. "Looks like we've got a couple of runaways on our hands."

"Where would they have even gone?" Shelby asked, her worry rapidly turned into anger as she listened to Rachel's voicemail greeting. Her daughter's disappearing act was no longer cute. It was beyond unacceptable for the teenager to continue thinking that she could go wherever she wanted and whenever she pleased without explicit permission.

Rachel was a child. Her child. The child who continued to put her in these remarkably awful positions where she had no idea what she was doing, who she was with, if she was okay. It was, without a doubt, the worst feeling in the world for the mother.

Shelby's fingers flew violently across her iPhone, typing a message that she prayed that the teenager had the good sense to reply to.

 _Shelby: Where are you? Why aren't you answering?_

A response came almost instantaneously and as soon as she finished reading it, her blood automatically boiled to dangerously high levels. Perhaps it was the state of inebriation that she was still very much under that was heightening her emotions, kicking it into overdrive. But in that moment, Shelby Corcoran has never been more furious with her daughter.

 _Rachel: Sorry, we're just finishing up a movie in Quinn's room. Be there in 20!_

"That. Little. Brat," Shelby seethed, a fresh swell of anger thrumming through her veins. "She just lied to me! Just flat-out lied to me."

"What did she say?" Kim asked, prying the phone away from her fuming sister to read the text message. Oh, for sure. Her niece was dead.

She gave the phone to Brian, who passed it along to Frannie and Will. By the time the incriminating piece of evidence made its way around the room and back to her, Shelby had already come up with a dozen ways to punish her child for this indiscretion.

"What are you going to do, Shel?" Frannie inquired about the fate of the scheming teenagers.

"Oh, I'm going to—"

"Do absolutely nothing, except wait for them to come back," Anne interfered, providing a voice of reason. "Honey, you don't even know where they are, and Rachel just said they'll be here soon. You can deal with her then."

"What? But Ma!' Shelby protested, mentally wincing at how childish her voice came out. "Rachel just blatantly lied to me. At least let me text her back."

"Shelby, no," Anne said firmly then extracted the phone from her older daughter's hands and pocketed it. "If you provoke her now, you'll only scare her off. Trust me. Just stay calm and let her come to you first, so that we can at least get them back here. _Then,_ I promise you that can do whatever you want to your daughter. No questions asked."

"I have to agree," Judy sighed heavily. She, also, was none too pleased with her youngest daughter at the moment, but she knew that she had to strategize here. "I wouldn't even know where to look for them. Quinn didn't mention anything to me. Has Rachel?"

Shelby paused and searched every corner of her mind for any sort of information that can help point to her missing daughter's whereabouts, but came up short. She mimicked Judy's sigh of frustration and shook her head no.

"Alright then, it's settled," Anne said, rubbing her daughter's back in sympathy. "I'm sorry honey, but if it makes you feel better, I actually think that this may be somewhat of a good sign? I think the fact that Rachel's pushing boundaries means that she is getting more comfortable with you. It's definitely not okay, but I know you'll steer her in the right course."

Shelby nodded her acknowledgement but her mother's reassurances did nothing to quell the irritation that seared through her with a burning passion. She was going to do more than steer her daughter in the right course. By the time Shelby's through with her, Rachel's going to fully understand that she built, owned, and controlled the goddamn course.

As soon as the two older women stepped out of the room, Shelby snapped her attention back to the remaining couples, her sight landing immediately on Will.

"Why do you look like you know something, Schuester?" Shelby demanded, smelling the weakness off of the suddenly nervous-looking man.

All eyes swerved to the teacher who was battling an internal war in his head. He might have an idea of where his two missing students were, but he doesn't know whether or not he was crossing the line by offering up that information. He was here as his girlfriend's guest, not as Rachel and Quinn's glee coach. He doesn't want to mix up roles. _But_ he also doesn't want to be the one to withhold pertitent intel from a worrying mother.

"I think I might know where the girls are," Will confessed warily.

"What? Where? Tell me," Shelby ordered him to speak.

"I—uh," he hesitated but then met Shelby's icy glare piercing into him, a look so cold and so sharp that he's certain can cut into glass. "They might be at a party. At Puck's house."

"What the hell is a Puck?" Shelby asked in pure exasperation, already slipping her shoes back on. "A party?"

"Puck is Noah Puckerman," Will explained. "I overheard the kids talking about his New Year's Eve party during rehearsal before the break. Something about his mom going out of town."

"Woah, Mini-Shel broke out to go to an unsupervised party," Brian said in awe, letting out a low whistle. "That's bold. I mean I remember my high school parties, all the drinking and the hooking up and the—"

"Babe, you're not helping," Kim interjected, fearing for her husband's life based on the unmistakable look of rage spreading across her sister's face. "Shelly?"

"Will, do you know where this Puck lives?" Shelby questioned.

"Oh no, Shelby. I don't think that'd be a good idea," Will objected. "I think Anne and Judy are right and it's probably a better idea to stay here, and also we can't even be certain that they are there. I could've misheard or—"

"Just tell the woman," Frannie urged, it was her turn to fear for the safety and well-being of her boyfriend. Even she knows better than to challenge a Shelby on a mission.

"Well I don't even know where he lives," Will responded, sufficiently backed into a corner.

"Wait, but I think I do," Frannie contemplated. "Puck is the kid with the mohawk, right? I think I might've dropped Q off there over Halloween. He lives super close by. Like definitely walking distance."

Knowing full-well that her decisions were being fueled by the copious amount of wine intoxicating her usually level-headed mind, she threw caution to the wind anyway. Sober Shelby would heed her mother's advice and wait patiently for her darling daughter to return. But drunk Shelby had no interest in waiting. Not in the slightest. Drunk Shelby wanted, no, _needed_ , to hunt down her lying and sneaky kid.

And she needed to do it now.

"Perfect," she replied rather calmly. "Who's with me?"

"But mom?" Kim whispered.

"She doesn't have to know," Shelby shrugged. "We'll be quick, grab the girls, and be back before she notices. Will and Brian can cover for us."

Kim and Frannie both looked at each other, a matching gleam in their eyes. Brian and Will can practically feel the excitement vibrating off of them. This was it. Years in the making. They finally get to go on a parentally-barred adventure with Shelby.

"Can we?" Kim dared to ask.

"Sure," Shelby indulged. "We can sneak out the basement window."

* * *

"You said what?!" Quinn groaned, scanning the text message exchange between the mother and daughter. "Why would you tell her that? What if they checked in on us and they were testing us?"

"I don't know!" Rachel replied hotly. "I panicked! Don't yell at me! Why didn't _you_ tell me that it was almost midnight?"

"Because my phone died!" Quinn barked, failing to control her growing panic. Of course they would lose track of time. She could see it clearly now. In the near future, her mother was going to kill her, and then probably resurrect her, so she can allow Shelby to kill her as well.

"Listen, it's fine," Rachel said more for her sake than anything else. "Look, my mom read the message. I saw the read receipt, and she didn't say anything. I _know_ her, if she was suspicious at all, she would've called me a million more times or texted back. I think we're still okay."

"Alright, fine, yeah," Quinn sincerely hoped. "Let's just go now. We might still make the countdown if we hurry."

They bid their quick farewells to a refrain of good lucks and well wishes. Regardless of what their mothers knew, the overwhelming need to survive overtook all of their other concerns. The innate desire for self-preservation was fueling their hustle to get back.

However in their haste to get out of the crowds, three monumental things happened all in succession that sealed their fate at the hands of their mothers.

One: Rachel accidentally and very unfortunately bumped into a certain tall and tormenting bully who's had a vendetta against her since she took him to task for his abhorrent treatment of Kurt.

"Holy crap, you freak, watch where you're going!" Karofsky roared, flicking the spilled beverage off his hands. "God, you and your homo friends are so freakin' annoying."

"Shut the hell up, Karofsky," Quinn snarled protectively. "It was an accident. Don't get your panties in a wad."

"Nobody's talking to you, Queen of the Chastity Ball," the football player replied. "I'm talking to the Captain of the Loser Brigade over here, who's been messing everything up at school ever since you all joined the Lullaby League. Now all you glee freaks think that you can do whatever you want. Christ, you all need to learn how to stay in your lane."

He directed the irrational animosity towards Rachel with a malicious glint in his eyes. Before the brunette could respond, he poured the remaining contents of his drink on her shoes.

Two: As the sticky substance seeped into her boots, Rachel's fury, weeks in the making, sprang to life. No longer interested in taking the high road, she swiped a Solo cup from an innocent bystander and didn't think twice before catapulting the drink onto Karofsky's menacing face.

And three: Nearly choking on her rage, it took Rachel exactly 3.27 seconds to realize that the questionable concotion of alcohol didn't land on the jock, who had moved out of the way milliseconds earlier, but instead all over her mother.

Her mother, who was rendered frozen, staring wide-eyed at her, and covered head-to-toe in Puckerman Punch.

"Ho...ly…" Frannie breathed, her jaw dropping to the floor.

Swaying her gaze from Rachel, whose complexion paled significantly in record speed, to Shelby, whose shock was slowly but surely wearing off, Kim immediately registered an all-consuming fear for the life of her niece and cried, "Run, Rae!"

* * *

 **A/N: To be continued, but would love to hear your thoughts so far! Thanks for joining me for another one.**

 **More of the aftermath, S &R, and regularly-scheduled drama coming up next. **


	18. Chapter 18

Rachel can confirm.

It was true what they said in the movies. That a person's life flashes before their eyes right before they die.

In the agonizing moments Rachel waited for her mother to respond after _accidentally_ dousing her with Puckerman Punch, fourteen years worth of memories flashed across her very eyes.

Her first ballet recital. Singing duets with her daddy on the piano. Eating breakfast at their favorite diner after Sunday morning runs with her dad. The adrenaline rush when the curtains went up during her first Broadway musical. Winning Sectionals. Even her mom's new habit of helping her brush her hair after she showered in the evenings was featured in the highlight reel of her life.

At the very least, Rachel can take solace in the fact that she was able to relive some of her happiest memories. That she can go in peace knowing that she had lived, laughed, and loved.

"Run, Rae!" She heard her Aunt Kim's voice filled with sheer terror cry out.

Snapping back into reality, Rachel's breath immediately caught in her throat and her heart thumped profoundly in her chest. Total fear pulsed through her entire body taking in the scene around her.

Karofsky vanished into thin air. Quinn and Frannie broke out into perfectly matching astonished expressions. The drunken festivities around them endured. But what held her gaze captive was the unmistakable fiery and smouldering rage clouding her mother's emerald green eyes.

Whipping her head from her aunt to Frannie then Quinn and back to her mother, with her life on the line, Rachel calculated her next move in supersonic speed.

Fight or flight.

She needed to defuse the bomb the only way she knew how.

In the biggest twist of the night, Rachel entered survival mode, closed the distance between her and Shelby, and threw her arms around her mother.

"Mom I'm so sorry," Rachel blurted out in pure panic, not caring about getting any of the mystery beverage on herself at this point. "But before you do or say anything else, please think about how _everyone_ at school is here and that if you do murder me, there are witnesses or if you yell at me now, I'll never be able to set foot in school again. Please, mom, _please_."

Immensely caught off-guard by the embrace, Shelby finally broke out of her trance and mentally cursed as her body reacted entirely on instinct and accepted the unexpected hug. However, as the stickiness of the unknown beverage permeated her clothes and trickled down her skin, a fresh swell of irritation with her runaway child spiked and swept away any inkling of maternal affection.

Inhaling a calming breath, Shelby drew the teenager in even closer, encompassed her arms around her completely, and whispered in her ear, "I am only going to ask you one time and if value your life or your reputation, you _will_ be honest with me. Have you been drinking?"

Swallowing back fear at the severity of the command, Rachel only shook her head frantically in response. Shelby pulled her head back slightly to look at her kid in the face, searching for the lie. Once she was satisfied, she glanced at her stunned sibling and Quinn and Frannie whose jaws dropped even further at the turn of events.

They were all in agreement. Rachel was certifiably insane.

"Mom—"

"Not a single word out of you," Shelby cut her off harshly, squeezing the girl enough to elicit an audible groan. "Listen to me and listen very closely, Rachel Barbra. You and Quinn will go outside and you are to wait for me. You are to go _nowhere_ until I return. You are not to even speak to one other. You will do nothing and say nothing until I come out to take you both home. Do you understand me, little girl? Do not speak. Simply nod your head if you understand my instructions."

A nod.

"Fantastic," Shelby replied in fake merriment then released her daughter from her grips. "Now, where is this so-called Puck?"

"Mom, you can't!" Rachel pleaded. "Please let's just go. _Please_ , mom."

Rachel was freaking out. She needed to draw the woman out before she could cause a scene. She already has enough to deal with at school without throwing her friends' lives into Shelby Corcoran's line of fire. She's fully aware that she's not exactly the most popular kid at McKinley, but what her mother was threatening was on another level of embarrassment. A blow to her reputation that she, undoubtedly, would not be able to salvage.

Speechless, Shelby just stared at her daughter in amazement. She had just caught the girl red-handed and her only concern was her popularity. The gall.

Frustration coursing freely, she pinched the bridge of her nose and channeled whatever patience she can gather deep down inside of her. "Quinn?"

Without a single hesitation, the equally frightened teenager pointed across the room to the mohawked football player in the middle of a rambunctious game of beer pong. Unlike Rachel, she had every desire to live to see another day, loyalties be damned.

"Rachel, do _not_ test me. I am not happy with you right now, young lady. Kim, Fran, will you please take the girls out and wait for me," Shelby instructed distractedly, grimacing in disgust as she flicked the remnants of the punch off her arms. "I'll be out in a second."

Both trained to follow the older Corcoran's orders, Kim and Frannie nodded their agreement and grabbed Rachel and Quinn by the arm respectively and dragged the escapees, against all of their protests, out and away from the house party.

"Aunt Kim, what are you even doing here?" Rachel questioned, a smidgeon of brazen bravery returning now that her mother was out of sight.

"Excuse me? Isn't that what I'm supposed to be asking you, kid," Kim replied once they reached the end of the driveway, crossing her arms at the mischievous teenager. "What are _you_ _two_ doing here when you were supposed to be next door?"

"Dude, Rachel, what did you throw at your mom?" Frannie interjected, still attempting to process everything that happened in the last five minutes. "Like what? Was that just shock?"

"Wait, _how_ did you guys know where to find us?" Quinn lamented. Unless they got an invite from Noah himself, there was no reason for any of the adults to know their whereabouts.

"Hang on a second, why is that cop staring at us?" Rachel said, ignoring all of the questions flying around. "Quinn! I think he followed us here. We're going to get arrested. I knew it."

"What? No, that's just Jack," Kim responded, turning around and waved to the officer leaning against the police car across the street. "He drove us here."

"Oh my god, it was Mr. Schue wasn't it?!" Quinn exclaimed in great fervor, realization dawning on her face. "It had to be him! Fran, this is so not fair, I can't believe your _boyfriend_ ratted us out. He can't use information that he finds out at school against us while we're home. That's cheating!"

"Q, are you insane?" Frannie replied, raising her voice to match. "Will's not the one who lied to mom and snuck out to go to a party. That was _all_ _you_ , little sis."

"What, so you're taking his side now?" Quinn accused. "Aren't you supposed to be _my_ sister? And don't act like you've never done this before either!"

"Aunt Kim, what are you talking about?" Rachel said over the noise, confusion flooding her thoughts. "And what's mom doing? I think we should go back in there."

"What's all over your shoes, Rae?" Kim inquired, noticing the trail of red footsteps around her niece. "And where's your jacket? Both of you, you must be freezing."

Before Rachel could say anything else, there was a sizzling sound that caught her attention and then one almighty bang as fireworks erupted above them. They simultaneously turned their heads upwards as a spectacular display of light filled the sky. All four of them were so entranced by the smattering of fizzing and sparking colors dancing across the neighborhood, they failed to realize that another police car pulled up and that the blaring of the music and all of the activity in the house had ceased.

As the last of the multicolored sparks exploded and trickled back down to earth, there was peace and absolute silence for the briefest of moments. However, not even a full second later, a flood of teenagers suddenly rushed out of the front door and into the yard, scrambling and colliding into each other in a complete disarray to get as far away from the house as possible.

It was total chaos.

Rachel and Quinn were trying to fight down their panic as scores of McKinley High students scattered everywhere throughout the lawn, driveway, and street to make their escape. Groups packed into cars with designated drivers while others fled on foot to make their way home. A far too-inebriated Cheerio even threw up into poor Nora Puckerman's bushes. And the two police officers that arrived were carefully monitoring the situation to ensure that no one under the influence got behind the wheel.

After most of the partygoers dispersed in record speed, Shelby finally emerged from the house with Puck and the rest of the glee kids in tow.

Rachel felt her stomach twist into a tighter knot scanning the thoroughly petrified expressions in each and every single one of their faces.

"Wow," Frannie said.

"We're dead," Quinn whispered.

"My life is over," Rachel groaned.

"Happy New Year?" Kim shrugged, digesting the mayhem around her.

Damn. Her sister was good.

* * *

"So why are they only _my_ daughters and _my_ granddaughter when they come home in a police car? And what is that red stuff all over Shelly?" Robert questioned, craning his neck to peer into the living room.

Shelby was on one end of the couch, a towel draped over her, nursing her third bottle of water and Rachel was on the opposite with crossed arms and a deep pout plastered on her face. Kim was slouched down in between them cradling a bag of Lays. With the exception of Kim's crunching of the chips, all three were sitting quietly, all seemingly deep in thought.

"Because I said so, Robert James Corcoran," Anne responded with quirked eyebrow and a warning look. "Who told me that he fixed and bolted the basement window shut years ago but _never_ did? Hmm?"

"Fair enough darling," Robert conceded, running his hand through his hair as memories of times when his wife managed to cut him down with an icy glare and a perfect, well-delivered one-liner flashed through his aging mind.

He glanced down at his watch. It was 1:00 in the morning and 15 minutes since the girls arrived and his house descended into madness. All he wanted was a peaceful evening with his family and closest friends. A low key and mellow gathering to ring in the new year.

Instead, he got teenagers on the lam, grown women sneaking out of basement windows, angry mothers interrogating husbands and boyfriends, police officers bringing members of his family home, and all the unnecessary fighting and shouting to boot. It was anarchy.

Next year, he and Anne would just go to a simple dinner or spend a quiet evening at home. None of this nonsense. He was too old for it.

"That's what I thought, dear," Anne said, patting her husband's shoulder. "I am going to clean up in the kitchen and then check on Brian and the kids. I will be back down shortly to join you. Good luck, grandpa."

"Yeah, yeah," Robert chuckled waving the woman off. He glanced back at the subjects of his exasperation. God, he loved them all. But how he loved sleep more.

Sighing, he grabbed a chair from the dining table and brought it with him setting it down in front of the couch.

"Alright, my lovely children and grandchild, who would like to go first?"

Rachel instantly rose to her feet and pointed to Shelby. "I'd just like the record to reflect that mom was the one who escalated things so quickly! Quinn and I were on our way home, you didn't have to come to the party and threaten everyone. And then—and _then_ mom almost had us arrested, grandpa!"

Groaning, Robert leaned back against the chair and crossed his leg. He was going to be here a while.

Shelby also stood up and glared at her child, fury emanating off of her. "Excuse me? Who is the one that said she was going to be right next door but then proceeded to break _all_ of my rules to go to a party. What were you thinking? Oh wait, I can answer that. You weren't, Rachel! You weren't thinking at all. And you lied to me, kid. If we're talking about escalating things, _you_ did that. Not to mention, I haven't forgotten the fact that You. Threw. A. Drink. At. Me. What on earth was that, Rachel Barbra? Will you please care to enlighten us all on why I'm drenched in whatever the heck this is!"

Reprimanded into silence, Rachel only crossed her arms over her chest and scowled back at her mother in response. The silence and tension in the air doubled.

Kim swung her gaze from Shelby to Rachel and popped another handful of potato chips in her mouth, thoroughly entertained by the drama of it all.

"Want some, daddy?" She offered, sitting up to extend the bag to the man.

Shaking his head in disapproval, Robert ripped the snack away from his youngest daughter's hand and set it down on the ground. He got up and stood in between the irate mother and daughter.

"Okay, we are going to try this again. Both of you, please sit back down," Robert pleaded, gently pushing Rachel then Shelby back towards the couch. "Now, it is very late and there are children sleeping upstairs, so there will be no more yelling, no interrupting each other, no outbursts or storming away. Do you understand? Because if not, I can always bring your mother back down here."

"Great," Robert said wryly, sitting back down after he received three shakes of the heads. "Rachel, what did you say about your mom getting you arrested?"

With a deep frown, Rachel nodded her head pitifully. "Yeah grandpa, she did. I was really scared. After they came to the party and mom scared everyone away, she made Quinn and I get into the back of a police car. She said she was going to take us home but then we passed by the house and they kept driving and wouldn't tell us where we were going!"

Clearing his throat to stifle back an amused laugh, Robert turned his head to his oldest daughter for an explanation.

"Alright Rach, let's simmer down on the theatrics, you're fine," Shelby sat up and shot her daughter an unsympathetic look. "I was not going to let Jack arrest you."

"Jack Bennett?" Robert scrunched his eyebrows at the mention of the son of one of their family friends. Now the deputy sheriff at the Lima Police Department, he was a childhood friend of Shelby and Kim's.

"Yes, we ran into him walking over to the party. He said he saw Rachel and Quinn pass by earlier. And then drove us over there because he just got a call in over the radio about a noise complaint in the neighborhood, someone called in a _party_ that seemed to be getting out of hand."

All three adults rotated their heads to Rachel who squirmed apprehensively under the unwanted attention.

"Anyway, I convinced him not to call in the calvary or do anything drastic and said that I'd get all the kids to just go home. He got a couple of his officers to come to take care of anyone being disorderly and to stop anyone from drinking and driving. Kim and Fran stayed to make sure everyone else got picked up."

"Then he drove you home?" Robert asked, trying to piece together the events of the evening.

"Then he drove us home," Shelby confirmed. "But after we had a very important conversation with the girls about the serious consequences of throwing parties and drinking under the age of 21."

"It was so _awful_ grandpa," Rachel interjected then inhaled a huge gulp of air before diving in to share her side of the story. "At first, nobody was saying anything and they weren't answering our questions, they even drove past Quinn's house and yours like super slowly, and then started talking about what the police do when they bust a party. They kept going on and on and on about how the cops can arrest anyone who drinks underage or has possession of drugs, how there are penalties for fleeing a party, that even the owner of the house may be questioned and held responsible for any illegal activities. They drove us all the way to the police station! I was so nervous and I seriously thought Quinn was going to throw up at one point. It was the worst. We didn't even drink! But I'm _never_ going to now. It's crazy grandpa, there's so many legal consequences. He said that it could go on my permanent record? What does that even mean, but can you _imagine_ if casting directors got a hold of that and they saw that I once got arrested for drinking underage when I was a teenager and didn't know any better. My Broadway career would be over before it even began!"

Robert's mouth fell open in shock at his granddaughter's objectively wild and rambling story. He swerved his gaze back to his daughter sharply and tried to register the emotion he currently felt brewing inside of him. Was that— _pride_? Aw, his Shelly-Bean was an overbearing parent now, employing her own and unique, albeit somewhat questionable, disciplinary methods. He swiped away an errant tear. They grow up so fast.

Shelby shrugged her shoulders casually at her father's expectant look and bit back a smirk. She merely wanted to impart the possible ramifications of the situation, she can't help that her kid's grand imagination had drawn those conclusions.

"And you, what do you have to say for yourself, Kimberly?" Robert turned his attention to his youngest.

"I—I think I ate too many chips," Kim heaved in discomfort as she stood up on her feet and rubbed her stomach. "I'm really sorry we ruined game night, pops. And for disobeying mom and also sneaking out. That's not the example we should be setting for the kids."

Chuckling at the self-awareness from his historically troublesome child, Robert leaned over and squeezed her arm affectionately. "Thanks for the apology, Kimmie. We can talk about it more in the morning. You may go upstairs and get ready for bed."

"Ok dad," Kim nodded appreciatively but swung back around to face her niece. "Miss Rachel, I hope you understand that what you did tonight was wrong. Going behind our backs like that, not cool kiddo. And Shelly, before you yell at me about it tomorrow, I _am_ sorry that I told Rae to run earlier. Rae, don't do that. Mainly because your mom is wicked fast and _will_ catch you."

"Get outta here," Shelby laughed, launching a pillow at her sister's retreating form that was unfortunately intercepted by her dad.

"It's late," Robert sighed. "And it's been a long night for all of us, so I will also let the two of you go. But I will say this Rach, your aunt is right. You and Quinn should have never left to go to that party. Your mom's rules are there for a reason, and you worried us again sweetheart. I thought we talked about the running away and disappearing."

"I know grandpa, I'm sorry," Rachel said, guilt beginning to gnaw at her insides.

"I know Rach, I get it," Robert replied. "You just wanted to have fun and didn't think it'd be a big deal. But next time, maybe you won't be so lucky and your mom won't be around to bail you out. You said it yourself, you could've gotten into real trouble with the cops. And I hardly think that any party is worth that."

"Yeah, I understand," Rachel nodded and dropped her gaze, unable to take the disappointment in her grandfather's eyes.

"Good. I imagine your mother has more to say about this, but we can save it for tomorrow," Robert said, offering the girl a warm smile. "Now, come give me a hug goodnight. Your mom will be up to check on you shortly."

Sighing, Rachel got up, walked over, and bent down slightly to give him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Night, grandpa. Sorry again but Happy New Year."

"Happy New Year, Rach. Sweet dreams."

As soon as the teenager left the room, Shelby immediately fell down on the couch in sheer exhaustion, throwing her arm over her forehead to complete the mood.

"Uggghhhhhh," the mother groaned.

Robert leaned over then peeled his daughter's arm from over her eyes and gave her a crooked smile. "Welcome to the club, mom."

* * *

After tossing and turning for what felt like hours, Rachel threw the covers off, rolled out of bed, and slipped on the hoodie that she shed earlier. Her mother tucked her in and made sure she was settled not too long after her grandpa sent her up and although she was completely exhausted, sleep evaded her. After everything, her mind was too wired to shut down.

Trying to be as silent as possible, Rachel crept down the hallway and tiptoed down the stairs in haste. Heading to the kitchen, she stopped outside the basement door and wondered briefly why it was marked off with a yellow caution tape.

"What are you doing out of bed, child of mine who refuses to listen to my instructions?" Shelby inquired with her back turned to the teenager standing by the doorway.

"I'm sorry, I just couldn't sleep," Rachel admitted, her stomach flipping as the older woman, now fresh and clean and free from all remnants of Puckerman Punch, turned around to face her. "Why are you up, mom?"

"Couldn't sleep either," Shelby agreed then resumed searching for ingredients out of the cupboards, puttering around to assemble everything she needed for waffles on the counter.

Truthfully, she didn't even try. It was past three by the time she finished talking to her parents, almost four when she stepped out of the shower. They have to be at the airport in about two hours and she didn't think it was worth it to fall asleep at that point. And admittedly, she also felt like she was already battling a hangover and wanted to get ahead of it, needing to rehydrate and replenish her body with nutrients. A punishment, she deemed, for allowing herself to succumb to Kim-pressure.

"I was also hungry. But _you_ should be in bed resting. You were up early yesterday too."

"Are you still mad at me?" Rachel asked nervously as she walked over to the kitchen island.

"I'm not angry at you Rachel, I'm just—disappointed," Shelby winced, slowly realizing how equally unpleasant it felt to be on the giving end of that statement. "We have a lot to talk about, young lady."

"I'm grounded, aren't I?" Rachel moped, perching herself on the barstool.

"Until next year," Shelby responded without a trace of sarcasm in her voice.

Rachel's mouth fell open in shock, her eyes going comically wide and after a few moments, Shelby allowed a very small smile to grace her lips at the look of incredulity taking over the teenager's face. She'll never tire of just how physically expressive her daughter was.

"Yes, you are grounded," Shelby deadpanned. "For three weeks."

" _Three weeks!?_ " Rachel gasped. She's _never_ , in her entire life, been grounded for that long. Usually, her dads let her off early for good behavior, so she can't even fathom being on lock down for that absurd amount of time. "But mom—"

Shelby lifted an impatient hand to cut off her daughter and shot her a glare so frigid; it automatically sent shivers down Rachel's spine. The teenager shut her mouth instantly.

"It was going to be a lot longer than that had I found out you were drinking, but I do acknowledge that you at least refrained from such a myopic decision. Three weeks and not a second sooner, Rachel Barbra," the mother stated, not at all interested in negotiating. "One week for sneaking out, one week for _lying_ to me, and one week for throwing the drink. No phone, television, or electronics with the exception of contacting your daddy, no going out though I will review on a case-by-case basis, but… absolutely no Lady Gaga concert this month since it's during your grounding."

"What! But Aunt Kim and Uncle Brian got me those tickets for Christmas," Rachel objected greatly, her whine grating on her Shelby's nerves. "Kurt and I already have our costumes ready. You can't do that, mom!"

"Oh I most certainly can," Shelby scolded, pitching her voice higher as she battled her thinning patience. "I'm sorry Rach, I am, but this is one of the consequences of your actions. I know you were looking forward to this, but I hope that this teaches you a lesson that what you did tonight was not okay. We've talked about this before, and I really don't care for repeating myself, so I am going to remind you one last time clearly and unequivocally: you cannot go anywhere without my permission and you absolutely cannot lie to me. Our relationship does not work that way. I thought you respected me enough to not blatantly disregard my rules, Rachel."

"I do, mom," Rachel insisted, beginning to register the weight of her actions. "I'm sorry, I just, I wasn't thinking. I don't know, I just wanted to have fun with my friends."

"I get that, I was a teenager once too," Shelby nodded in understanding. "And there is a proper time and place for that but tonight, you were supposed to be here with me and your family. Instead, you took advantage of my trust, snuck away, and lied to me to go to an unsupervised party with alcohol and god knows what else. So, for that reason, there will be no fun in your immediate future. Rather, lots and lots of chores and _laundry_ because that was my favorite sweater you ruined, my little party animal."

"This is so unbelievably unfair," Rachel frowned deeply, crossing her arms over her chest in contempt. "Dad wouldn't—"

"Thirty-seven minutes," Shelby stated in a low and dangerous tone. "It took me thirty-seven minutes to get all that _punch_ out of my hair, Rachel."

"But _mommy,_ I didn't mean to throw the drink at you," Rachel whined and subconsciously kicked the kitchen island petulantly. "That was an accident!"

"That may be so, my little girl, but you did intend to throw the drink at _someone_ and that is absolutely not okay," Shelby countered sharply. She can do this all night if she had to. Rachel was not going to manipulate her way out of this one. "I know you were raised better than that. We _do not_ treat people that way. How would you feel if someone threw a drink at you?"

"But he started it—" Rachel's voice trailed off as soon as she realized what she said.

"Who started it, Rach?" Shelby interrogated. She's not dense. She knows her daughter's not a malicious person who callously throws drinks around in people's faces. Rachel was provoked, and now Shelby wants to know why and by whom.

"It's not important," Rachel blurted out, a response that came far too quickly for the mother's liking. Shelby opened her mouth to reply but clasped it back shut as she saw a range of emotions flicker across her daughter's face.

Suddenly overcome with guilt over the entire night, Rachel averted her mother's gaze and played with the hem of her shirt to buy herself time to organize her thoughts. She _hates_ disappointing her mom, probably more than anything, and hearing about her actions from her perspective was making her realize that perhaps she had made the wrong choices.

Sighing after a few moments of silence, Rachel finally looked up and admitted, "Never mind, you're right mom. I didn't make the right decisions, you expected better of me and I let you down. I-I wasn't thinking and I was only interested in doing whatever I wanted without considering you or your rules. I shouldn't have done any of that—the sneaking around, the lying, or throwing the drink, especially that. I am sorry and I do regret it."

Rachel's aware, probably more than her mother realizes, what it's like to have an unwanted substance thrown in her face. _Awful_. Getting slushied was utterly miserable. She could handle the ignorant insults that were hurled at her at school every day and she was immune to the notion that nobody outside of glee seemed to like her, but the slushies, always unexpected, yet somehow inevitable, were a different matter. She couldn't necessarily physically block the "bitch slaps that felt like icebergs," as Kurt once aptly described them. And she'd never intentionally want to make anyone feel less than in the way getting slushied constantly made her feel, so the fact that she had resorted to the methods of her agonizers didn't settle well on her conscience at all.

Thawing at the first signs of genuine remorse, Shelby also sighed then set down the bowl of batter she was mixing and faced her daughter so they could make direct eye contact.

"Thank you for that apology, Rach. You have a lot of legwork ahead of you to fully earn back my trust, but you are forgiven," Shelby said earnestly. "However, you didn't answer my question kid—is there something going on at school that you're not telling me? Is there _anyone_ bothering you?"

Wordlessly, Rachel shook her head no and chewed on her bottom lip while she thought about how much she wanted to divulge. "It's fine, mom. I told you before, some kids at school just don't get me and we clash. But it's okay, I'm handling it."

"Really?" Shelby prodded, her voice full of skepticism. "Because if tonight's any indication, it doesn't really seem like you are. Why won't you tell me, Rach? I only want to help."

"I know," Rachel acknowledged. "But that's the problem. I need to learn how to stick up for myself and you can't keep fighting my battles for me. You do it all the time."

"Excuse me?" Shelby inquired, genuinely confused about the accusation.

"Don't pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about, mother," Rachel argued.

"I'm not pretending," Shelby said truthfully. "Please enlighten me, daughter."

"Mom, you're so overprotective, and it's just—it's a lot sometimes," Rachel confessed warily. "Like remember when you reamed my ballet teacher out for the improper technique thing, and now she's not really teaching me anything else because she's afraid you're going to, what did you say, 'put her out of business faster than she can say pirouette if she doesn't learn how to teach her students how to dance without constantly putting them at risk for traumatic and overuse injuries.' Or even the other week when that cashier from the Lima Bean made fun of my sweater, I haven't seen him working there since then!"

"Alright," Shelby scoffed in protest. "I had nothing to do with that cashier. That's merely a coincidence. Although, I will say he was rude. I think your sweaters are quite adorable. _But_ I will not apologize about your bumbling buffoon of a dance teacher who can't tell her plie's apart from her jete's. She was teaching you incorrect forms and techniques and building bad habits that could've really done permanent damage in the long-run, Rachel."

"Yes, fine, but that's still not my point," Rachel sighed. "I appreciate that you look out for me, mom. I do. But I just, I want to know that I can handle myself and protect myself without you swooping in and going all defcon five and Coach Corcoran on anybody who even looks at me funny."

Actually feeling a piece of her heart break, Shelby only nodded and collected her thoughts while she pushed down a deep sadness seizing her emotions. She just got her daughter back, and Rachel asking her to let go even a little bit was a tough and bitter pill to swallow. But her daughter was not a baby anymore; she's not a little girl who needed to be coddled. Rachel was a teenager, a young woman, who was navigating the world around her and wanting to learn how to stand on her own. As much as it pained her to have bypassed all the hand holding, Shelby knows it wouldn't be right or fair to stifle her daughter's request for more independence.

"Okay," the mother said softly. "I am hearing you Rachel, and I understand where you're coming from. I will actively try my best to allow you the space to handle these situations on your own. _However,_ I am doing so under the stipulation that you must do your part and use and reserve your best judgment to make the right decisions. Because despite your actions tonight Rach, I truly believe that you are an intelligent and compassionate individual who is more than capable of getting your point across without resorting to throwing drinks in people's faces, even if they did _start it_. So, I am going to let this one go, my love, because I am choosing to trust you, but the moment I see or hear otherwise, all bets are off. You may not feel like you need me, but I am your mother and I only want to help."

"Alright, I get it," Rachel agreed, pleased with the compromise. "And it's not that I don't need you mom. Of course I do. You and dad and daddy will always be the first I come to for help if I need it. I just—I want to learn how to be strong, just like you are. You're not afraid of anyone or anything, and people respect that and admire that about you, you know? I mean I do."

"If you're trying to sweet talk your way out your punishment, it's not going to work," Shelby cracked, reaching over to gently squeeze her daughter's arm. "But it did work just enough for me to also make you a waffle. But absolutely no chocolate chips! You are under a no-fun lock down, young lady."

* * *

Pulling a baseball cap down her head in an attempt to hide the fatigue marked on her face, Shelby climbed into the Range Rover more than an hour later. Breaking out into a jaw-cracking yawn, she turned on the ignition, blasted the heat, and lowered the volume of the radio, not too keen on jamming out to Rachel's "Songs to Sing in the Shower" playlist at 5:30 in the morning.

She was drained physically and mentally and the day had yet to begin.

She dragged down the mirror to inspect the damage and cringed noticing the crease in her forehead and the prominent dark shadows under her eyes but also couldn't help a smile from blooming thinking about the cause. Unconditionally, the battle scars of motherhood were worth it.

"Sorry, grandma caught me right before I walked out and she said that if I ever lie to her or sneak away, then being grounded is the least of my concerns," the teenager shuddered at the warning as she got into the passenger seat. "What does she mean by that?"

Shelby chuckled lightly, recalling all the creative ways her mother punished her and Kim in the past. "You don't want to know. But Rach? Can I ask you something?"

"Sure mom," Rachel answered as she buckled up her seatbelt.

"Why didn't you just ask me if you could go to your friend's house last night?" Shelby pondered, her focus trained on the rear view mirror while she backed out of the driveway.

"Well, would you have let me?" The girl grumbled.

"Probably not because we had plans but I don't know, I would have considered it," Shelby said honestly. "Contrary to your belief, I do want you to be able to spend time and have fun with you friends. I know you're still adjusting here and I think it is a good idea for you to get to know your teammates outside of glee."

"Well, I didn't really want to go at first but then, I don't know, I just wanted a distraction," Rachel sighed, sleep-deprivation and exhaustion also weighing heavily on her. "And what does it matter now that I'm grounded until the end of time. What friends? They're all going to forget that I exist after I'm done with your life-sentence."

"Alright, calm down, drama queen," Shelby laughed, reaching over to pat her daughter's knee in a placating manner. "But what did you mean by you wanted a distraction?"

"Oh, nothing," Rachel shifted away from her mom uncomfortably and glanced out the window.

"Rachel," Shelby prompted, employing a gentler tone in order to draw a response. "I thought we agreed that we'd start talking to each other. Honey, I just want to know what you're thinking."

"I just don't want daddy to leave," Rachel said, attempting to keep her voice even and measured, but years of musical training helped Shelby pick up on the strain in her voice. "I still don't understand why he has to," she added.

"I know Rach, but this sabbatical is a great opportunity for him to research and write for his book. It'll help him become a better professor," Shelby tried to explain. "And it's not permanent. He'll be back in a year and you'll get to see him in a couple months and then over the summer and maybe we can even spend the holidays there next year."

"But he has a perfectly good job in Chicago already," Rachel replied with a sad sigh. "And that's already _too far_. Why doesn't he want to be with me?"

"Rachel, baby, he's your father. Of course he wants to be with you," Shelby said, turning to face her when they arrived at the stoplight. "He just—"

"This time last year, we all spent New Year's Eve in New York together. And you know what I keep thinking about?" Rachel asked, meeting Shelby's gaze. "I keep thinking about how weird I thought it was that we had to stay in different hotel rooms because dad said he _accidentally_ booked two and didn't want to waste the other. And now, one year later, daddy's moving to another country, and I get that it's for work. But I don't know mom, it just— _sucks_."

In that moment, it was with an uncontrollable desperation that Shelby wished she could take away the hurt lighting her daughter's eyes, but she found herself at a loss for words over the situation and just simply had to agree.

"Yeah kid," the mother said as the light turned green and resumed their drive to the airport. "It does suck."

* * *

"Good morning you two, Happy New Year!" Hiram greeted, amusement coloring his expression. "You both look like hell. Coffee for you Shelbs and tea for you sweetheart."

"Yeah, you can thank your daughter for that," Shelby teased, graciously accepting the much-needed beverage. She was going on more than 24 hours without sleep now.

"Oh, why is she only _my_ daughter when she makes a break for a rager," Hiram said, smirking at his teenager as he pulled her in for a side-hug.

"Dad, _please_ don't tell me that you're going to punish me as well," Rachel implored. "Mom already went overboard with the consequences. Like, she took away Gaga. Can you even believe it?"

Hiram shared a knowing look with Shelby and rubbed his daughter's arm in fake sympathy. "Seems to me that you deserved your sentence, Rach. We'll discuss why your escapade was not even remotely okay later, and I will be enforcing whatever your mom handed down but no, there will be no double jeopardy."

"Where's daddy?" Rachel asked, craning her neck to scan the early-morning rush at the Lima Allen County Airport.

"He is checking in his bags," Hiram answered. "Last I looked he was at the front of the line, so he should be here soon before he goes through security."

"Oh okay," Rachel nodded, tossing that information around in her head before making a split-second decision. "Be right back, I-I have to go to the bathroom."

"Let's just give her a few minutes," Shelby interjected, noticing the concern streaking across the father's face as they watched their daughter stalk away in haste. "I think she needs a moment and if she's not back soon, I'll go and check on her."

After making sure that the teenager went to the designated destination, Hiram brought his attention back to Shelby and broke out into a sly smile. "So… you brought her home in a police car?"

"You should have seen the look on her and Quinn's faces," Shelby chuckled in deep satisfaction. "I do think that at least the no drinking lesson has been imparted."

"Nice job, mom," Hiram said impressed and gave the woman a fist bump in approval. "Although, I am still a little confused about it. Partying doesn't really seem like it's Rachel's thing."

"She hasn't slept, so I think any more lectures are going to have to wait for another day," Shelby informed. "And we did talk earlier, but I think she just wanted to blow off some steam. I don't think this," Shelby gestured to Leroy wrapping things up at the check-in desk. "Is going to be easy on her."

"I know," Hiram agreed. "We went through an adjustment period when we moved over the summer and it was rough. Honestly, I feel like I was also in a bit of a haze then, but I promise this time I am going to work harder to help Rach through this."

"We both will," Shelby vowed then smiled as Leroy approached. As much as she didn't want him to leave for their daughter's sake, Shelby can understand why he wanted to from a career standpoint and she, of all people, couldn't fault him for that. Leroy was a good man and an even better father and she had faith that he will continue to be, regardless of the distance.

"Where's Rach?" Leroy asked distractedly while he organized his passport and tickets with shaky hands, attempting to gain his bearings.

"Bathroom," Shelby and Hiram replied simultaneously, picking up on the father's frayed nerves.

"Alright, so my cell phone should be working immediately when I get there but my landline won't be set up for a couple days. I emailed you both my apartment address and contact information for my office at the University. You both can call or text me any time, regardless of the time difference, I mean it. Especially Rach, please tell her that I don't care if it's past midnight, I will always try to be available to her. I'm still working out trying to come back for Regionals and I'll let you know once I have that approved; otherwise, I'll see you in a couple months Shelbs and Hiram, whenever I get back, I guess," he drew in a deep and generous breath once he finished rambling, shook his head then paused to look at them with a heartfelt sincerity in his eyes. "Thank you, both of you, for supporting this decision. You can't imagine how much it means to me but I—you will take care of our girl?"

"We'll be okay," Hiram assured, sweeping away the swirl of emotions and unresolved feelings he currently felt towards his ex-husband. Without another thought, he drew Leroy in for a brief and unexpected hug. "Good luck with everything over there. Be safe and take care of yourself."

"And we'll take care of Rach. Always," Shelby promised with a smile then opened her arms up to the man. "I'm upset that I only got you back and you're already leaving. I'll miss you but I am really happy for you. You deserve this."

"Thanks Shelbs, so do you," Leroy whispered as he tightened his grip on the younger woman. "I know Rachel will be fine especially because she has you now. We're all better off with you back in our lives."

"Daddy?" Rachel interrupted, capturing all of the adults' attention as she walked over timidly. "Sorry I took a while, I went and got you some magazines for the plane. But I wasn't sure what you wanted, so I sort of got them all. There's even a 'Better Homes and Garden' in case you want ideas on how to decorate your new place," she offered him the stack, still refusing to make eye contact.

Accepting the magazines, Leroy swallowed back a lump in his throat as he regarded his unfailingly considerate daughter in front of him. He set them on top of his carry-on before pulling her into a crushing embrace. "Thanks, princess. That's very thoughtful of you. I'm going to miss you more than you know, Rach. But be a good girl for your mom and dad, and I'm only a phone call away if you need me."

"You promise you'll come back?" Rachel asked with a quiver in her voice that spoke directly to the hearts of all three parents.

Ignoring the pang in his chest, Leroy reached over and tucked a strand of hair behind Rachel's ear, yet again struck by how fast his little girl was growing up. "I promise. Will you walk me over to security, princess?"

Rachel blinked hard a couple times and only nodded, forcing a faint smile to form on her lips. Gathering his belongings, Leroy bid another round of quick farewells to the other parents before throwing his arm around the teenager and leading them to the security check-point.

A heavy silence settled over Shelby and Hiram while they watched the father and daughter say their goodbyes a few yards away. Unable to hear their conversation, Shelby's heart wrenched as Rachel stepped forward and fell into Leroy's arms again, gripping fistfuls of his jacket and burying her face in his shoulder. After a few moments, Rachel released her hold, turned on her heel, and walked away without looking back.

Forcing her feet to move as quickly as they could without breaking out into a run, Rachel crashed immediately into her mother. To her embarrassment, she felt a stinging pressure build behind her eyes as her vision blurred and warm, heavy tears spilled down her cheeks. Drawing in gasping breaths, her face flushed red while she tried to stomp down the profound and unbidden rush of emotions.

Shelby instantly wrapped her arms around Rachel's small and sobbing frame. "I've got you, baby," she whispered as her cheek came to rest on top of her daughter's head and a hand rubbed light circles into her back. "I've got you."

* * *

 **A/N — :( for Rachel but :) from me on all the love from you guys on the last chapter. Thanks a ton and hope you all enjoyed the update. Next chapter Rach starts to work out some of her issues with her dads and more of the Karofsky situation comes to a head.**


	19. Chapter 19

Hyper-focused on keeping her breath steady, Rachel zoomed across the finish line to complete her seventh lap around the outdoor track. Deciding that she'd make it an even two miles, she kept going and pumped her legs to gain momentum with each push. The soles of her shoes slapped heavily against the concrete sending her jetting past the various figures that blurred in her speed.

She felt her entire body working; her calves burned, lungs strained, and blood flowed into her limbs. Apart from the high she received from singing, these were the moments where she felt the most alive. When she felt at peace enough to just leave it all behind. Engulfed by the euphoria, she paved way for the endorphins to carry her through another lap around the football field.

At the last 100 meters, another rush of adrenaline surged through her veins and she quickened her pace, turning steps into leaps. Once she crossed the finish line, she checked her watch while she slowed down, immensely satisfied at the new personal record.

"You know this track is on private property, so you're technically trespassing!" Jesse shouted after the girl bolted past him without as much as a glance back.

Rachel spun around at the call and placed her hands on her hips, concentrated on catching her breath and trying to appease her need for oxygen.

"Also, it's like barely 20 degrees out here," Jesse added, smirking as he closed the distance between them. "You're so strange, Rachel Berry."

"It's called exercise weirdo, ever heard of it?" Rachel quipped, strutting past the singer to head towards the bench where she left her belongings.

"Yeah, twice a day at rehearsals, quite rigorously, I might add," Jesse responded as he trailed after her. "And I do vocal exercises every morning, thank you very much."

Rachel rolled her eyes while she used a towel to wipe the thin layer of sweat that covered the nape of her neck. "You know some people might call this habit of yours of randomly running into me _stalking_."

"Don't flatter yourself," Jesse replied. "We just got cut and your mother sent me out here to let you know that she's going to be another 20 minutes so you need to come back inside."

"Ugh, why?" Rachel groaned. Her muscles burned out, she sat down on the bench then slipped on a jacket before fishing for the water bottle in her duffel bag.

"Dunno," Jesse shrugged, plopping down to join her. "Goolsby's probably trying to talk her into incorporating more of his lackluster ideas into our Regionals set."

Rachel only nodded when she noticed her company's entire countenance drop dramatically. "Goolsby is the new assistant coach? My mom said he started after the holidays."

"Yeah, Dustin Goolsby," Jesse confirmed with a long-drawn out sigh. "I blame you, you know."

"What are you talking about?" Rachel breathed out after guzzling down half of a water bottle.

"All I'm saying is that we didn't need an assistant coach before _you_ came into the picture," Jesse teased, earning yet another elbow jab from the irate brunette.

"Oh I'm sorry, St. Jackass, should my mother and I go back to pretending like the other doesn't exist just because your fragile male ego can't handle the fact that someone else has her ear now?"

Jesse stared at Rachel intently and bit back an amused laugh. She always had something to say.

"I'm joking," he said, leaning against her playfully and glanced at her sideways. "I was with her, you know? When she first saw you at Sectionals… you _literally_ took her breath away. I think it's pretty cool that you guys found each other again."

Smiling, Rachel leaned back slightly before standing back up on her feet to begin her cool-down stretches. "So I take it you don't like Dustin?"

"No, and frankly, I don't think we even need him," Jesse said, running a hand through his thick curly locks. "I don't know how to quite explain it but something about him feels off. I don't think he get us but he keeps giving Coach C these random suggestions that don't make any sense. Like, he's in charge of Saturday rehearsals now and last weekend he modified half of our routine and it doesn't even fit."

"Well, what does my mom say about it?"

"She vetoed some of his changes but she's letting him try new choreo tomorrow. It's not even our style though, so I'm not sure what she's thinking," he lamented.

"Maybe you're just not used to change," Rachel stated, catching Jesse's insulted look while she bent over to touch her toes. "It's only been like two weeks, you might just have to give him a chance. Besides, we're talking about my mother here. If Goolsby's really that clueless, she's not going to let him tell her what to do."

"I guess," Jesse said thoughtfully. "I just don't appreciate the fact that he's coming in mid-season guns a blazing and trying to change things up. I don't trust him. We've worked too hard and we have a national championship to defend."

"Fair," Rachel agreed. "He's an outsider, so that makes sense. But don't you trust my mom?"

"Of course," Jesse scoffed in complete disbelief at the question. He'd be nothing without Shelby Corcoran and the doors she's helped open for him. His entire future was only possible because of her and what they've built together.

"Alright then, so just trust that she knows what she's doing," Rachel responded, throwing her arm above her head to stretch her triceps. "And honestly, consider yourself lucky. At least your problem is that you have _too many_ coaches. Mr. Schue's been canceling practices because he's in a community theater production of Les Mis and they're in tech this week."

"You're joking," Jesse chuckled, still entirely perplexed about the workings of the second-rate show choir team.

"I wish," she shook her head, irritation flashing across her face. "He's playing Jean Valjean, and it's ruining my life."

"Oh wow. Is that why you had to come to rehearsal with Shelby today?"

"That," Rachel confirmed. "And because I've been grounded and Supreme Overlord Shelby Corcoran doesn't trust me to be home alone."

"Grounded?" Jesse asked in an intrigued tone.

"Wouldn't you like to know," Rachel replied with a smirk. "Hey, can you hand me my bag?"

Nodding, Jesse grabbed the workout bag to offer to Rachel but failed to notice it was unzipped and dropped all of its contents accidentally

"Crap, sorry," Jesse apologized, jumping instantly to gather the spilled items. He picked up a damp sweater completely stained with a blue substance that felt sticky in his hands.

"Jeez Rach, what did argyle ever do you to?" He teased, holding the sweatshirt up in the air to inspect the damage. "Did you spill a smoothie on this or something?"

Rachel's eyes grew impossibly wide and she pried the piece of clothing from Jesse's hands then shoved it in the bag she just picked up, her heart thundering in her chest in the process.

"Shut up, Jesse," Rachel growled, collecting all of her things in a panic-driven haste. The absolute last thing she needed was the captain and star of their rival show choir team finding out about the New Directions' penchant for slushie facials. She'd rather give up her solos for a month than show the enemy any signs of weakness.

"What?" Jesse prompted, snatching the duffel back and pulled out another item of clothing, a skirt this time, that was also drenched in the unknown substance. "How did you manage to completely miss your mouth? Or what, did someone throw a drink at you or something?"

After a few seconds of silence, Jesse's grin slowly faded when Rachel's entire body went rigid and face turned somber. He scrunched his eyebrows together in confusion then rifled through the bag again, finding other ruined shirts, skirts, and socks. "What is this, Rachel? _Did_ someone throw a drink at you? Multiple drinks?"

"It's nothing," Rachel exhaled a loaded sigh, ripping the evidence away then zipped up the bag and threw it over her shoulder. "Don't worry about it."

"Wait, hang on," Jesse reached out for her arm and pulled her back before she could walk away. "Sorry. I was just teasing earlier, but what's going on?"

"I said it's nothing!" Rachel exclaimed, raising her voice out of frustration. "Just leave it alone, Jesse. _Please_."

Jesse released his grasp and stepped back as if he'd just been struck, hurt seeping into his facial features. "Okay, sorry. I was just wondering and I-I thought we were friends."

"We are," Rachel said quietly, her face flushing at the unbidden outburst. She took her fingers and brushed her forehead diffidently, mulling over how to explain herself. "I'm sorry. It's not you. It's—I get slushied sometimes, but it's not a big deal."

Not waiting for a response, Rachel pivoted on her heels and began to head to the school building. The sooner she went inside, the sooner she could end this conversation.

"Slushied?" Jesse asked for more elaboration as he ran after her. "What the hell? Why?"

"Yes, as in, occasionally, some ingrate jock throws a slushie in my face," Rachel responded, quickening her pace. "I know this concept may be difficult for you to understand Jesse, but not everybody thinks that show choir's the coolest thing in the world. And this is _especially_ true at McKinley."

" _What_? So just because some idiots think that singing and dancing is lame that gives them the right to throw random shit in your face?" He asked in utter shock. "That's so fucked up, Rachel. Does this only happen to you?"

"No," Rachel replied. Although lately, it seemed like she's been the only target on Karofsky and company's radar. Before, she was lucky if she could get through the week with just one incident, but in the week and half she's been back since the holiday break, she's been slushied four times.

"Well, have you told anyone about it? Has anyone tried to stop it? Because that's literally the definition of bullying, Rachel. Maybe even assault. It also seems like this has clearly happened more than once," Jesse pointed out, his anger swelling.

"They don't care," Rachel shrugged, focused on weaving her way through the parking lot. "Teachers see it happen all the time. And our principal could not care less about anything that isn't about bringing more money into the school. He literally just walked by earlier when a hockey player pushed Kurt against a locker."

Jesse balked at the information then lunged to grab Rachel's arm again, causing her to stop in her tracks. "You can't be serious, Rachel. That stuff only happens in like movies."

"Well and apparently in my reality," Rachel grumbled, turning back around to face him, her expression riddled with defeat. "But it's fine, Jesse. I'm figuring it out. I'm handling it. And those losers are going to get bored soon anyway and they'll move on and find something else to entertain them in their miserable lives."

"This is insane. You have to tell your mom then," Jesse demanded, his tone firm.

"No, absolutely not," Rachel said, yanking her arm away and squaring her shoulder as if she was gearing up for a fight. "Jesse, do not, under any circumstance, tell my mother what I just told you."

"Oh my god, Rachel! Why not?" Jesse said incredulously. "You know Shelby would take care of it instantly. You don't deserve to put up with that. No one does. It's completely barbaric and you're just letting it roll off your back! How are you just so okay with this?"

"I'm not!" Rachel snapped causing Jesse to flinch in surprise. She breathed in deeply and tried to get herself under control. She could feel herself losing it, but she was not about to break down over this. Not here, not now.

"It's _not_ okay. Don't you think I know that? I _hate_ what they do to me and my friends at school. I _hate_ how they treat us. I _hate_ how it makes me feel. But I also just need to deal with this myself right now without you or my mother swooping in to come save me. Okay?"

"No," Jesse said, shaking his head in total disapproval. "You're in the wrong here and you're being incredibly stubborn for absolutely no good reason. You need to tell Shelby or one of your dads before it gets out of control. Asking for help doesn't make you weak, Rachel."

"And I will, okay?" Rachel sighed, her shoulders sagging. She paused to collect her thoughts then gazed into the blue eyes that were piercing into her with such concern that made her stomach twist in guilt. She looked away and stamped down the flurry of emotions bubbling inside her.

"I promise. If it gets any worse or if it escalates past the slushies, I swear I'll tell my mom. But it's my life Jesse, and _I_ get to decide on how to handle this. I get that you only want to help, but this is _my_ problem, not yours. And I chose to tell you because we are friends and now I'm asking you, as my friend, to _please_ keep this to yourself for now. Please."

Responding to the severity laced in Rachel's voice and the pleading look in her all-too expressive eyes, Jesse found himself nodding his agreement against his better judgment. "Fine, suit yourself. But don't be a martyr, Rachel. It's not worth it. You don't deserve to be treated that way and it's not okay that they just get away with it."

"I hear you Jesse," Rachel assured, the short-lived tension easing out of her body now that she's avoided being exposed for the time being. "Thanks. I know you're only looking out for me. And I swear, if I ever find myself in the middle of a sing-off, I _will_ call you for help."

"Shut up," Jesse laughed. "Also, I am just going to point out that none of that crap happens here at Carmel. It's not tolerated. Especially if you're in VA. We get respect."

"Yeah, yeah," Rachel rolled her eyes, waving him off. "Your arrogance is showing St. James, and it is _not_ flattering."

"Are you kidding me?" Jesse scoffed, opening up his arms wide and spinning around smoothly. "Ladies _love_ this."

"In your dreams!" Rachel shouted back, already yards away and entering the building.

* * *

Replaying the encounter with Jesse in her head, Rachel walked through the nearly empty and expansive halls of Carmel with a hurried pace. Usually, she liked to take her time to explore the impressive fixtures of the affluent public school, but she was afraid Jesse would catch up to her, and she was no longer interested in entertaining that conversation any further.

She made it to her mom's office on the third floor, located right off a wing the school designated for the music department. Shaking off her still-racing thoughts, she allowed herself a moment to regroup before knocking on the closed door and waited before receiving permission to enter.

"Hi Rach, how was your run?" Shelby asked without looking up from the stack of papers in front of her.

It was times like these when Rachel found her mother sitting at her desk buried in papers to grade or working through Vocal Adrenaline routines that she often wondered why the woman ever left the stage behind. Why anyone would trade in the bright lights of Broadway to teach high school students in suburbia.

But then she thought about how fiercely loyal Jesse was outside when she questioned him earlier or the dozens of Christmas gifts her mom received from students last month, and she also realized how beloved Shelby Corcoran, the teacher, was.

Rachel resolved that whatever she did in the future, Broadway or otherwise, that she'd do it with as much class and diligence as her mother, who seemed to tackle, overcome, and excel at any challenge thrown her way.

"It was good," Rachel finally answered. "I set a new PR and I think my split time is almost as fast as dad's."

"Very impressive," Shelby said then looked up to examine her daughter, smiling instinctively at her presence. "And also very competitive of you."

"I get it from you," Rachel joked, picking up one of the loose documents closest to her. "What are you working on?"

"Finalizing VA's budget request for Nationals, it's due to our Booster Club tomorrow," Shelby replied. "I'm almost done but it'll be another fifteen minutes or so. Make yourself comfortable on the couch, I turned on the space heater so you can warm up."

"Nationals?" Rachel questioned, brows furrowing in scathing offense. "But you haven't even won Regionals yet! That's so presumptuous of you! We could still beat you guys, you know. We're just as good as you are."

"Woah, slow down there, killer," Shelby placated then snatched the piece of paper away from Rachel's hands. "It's only a _preliminary_ request. They just want to see some numbers _in case_ we do win so they can plan ahead."

"Oh," Rachel pouted. "But still. I do think it's a bit bold of you to just assume. The New Directions could still win. We're working hard too."

"I never said you weren't kid," Shelby sighed, absolutely dreading the fact that she has to compete against the girl. "Nobody is underestimating you. I know you guys are good. You, _especially_ , my love. But we've talked about this before, Rach. Chinese wall, remember?"

Rachel matched her mom's sigh and nodded. They had a lengthy discussion a few weeks ago about navigating their tricky situation. Being on rival show choir teams was less than ideal for the mother and daughter. However, Shelby made it clear that she was Rachel's mom first, coach of Vocal Adrenaline second. They decided they would both try their best to keeps things objective and respectable. They also agreed to enforce a Chinese wall. A business term, Shelby explained, that meant enforcing a figurative barrier as a means of restricting the flow of information to avoid their conflict of interest. Shelby didn't talk about Vocal Adrenaline business and Rachel didn't discuss what the New Directions were up to. It was to keep things impartial and fair, so that nobody could fault them later on for sharing any intel, intentional or not, that could influence the competition.

Perhaps to anyone else, the precaution may seem excessive or even slightly paranoid, but to the two-time national championship winning coach and her equally overly-ambitious and competitive daughter, there was nothing remotely trivial about show choir.

Before Rachel could respond, a knock on the door tore her away from her thoughts and captured her attention.

"Come in," Shelby said, still maintaining a curious gaze on her daughter, wondering where the girl went just now.

"Hey, sorry Shelby," Dustin Goolsby apologized. He walked into the room tentatively to the sight of the mother daughter in the midst of a stare down. "I just wanted to drop this off on my way out. They're the transfer papers."

"Great, thanks," Shelby accepted, breaking her gaze first. "Dustin, this is my daughter—"

"Rachel Berry," Dustin acknowledged, extending his hand out to the girl. "Your performance with the New Directions at Sectionals last fall was inspired. Also wow, you and your mom look so much alike. You could be sisters. And I bet you're just every bit as talented as Shelby here."

"Thanks," Rachel smiled politely as she accepted the handshake.

She took a brief moment to size Dustin up, Jesse's voice in her head clouding her impression of him. He was an objectively handsome man who looked nice enough at first glance, but Rachel had to agree, there was something discernibly _off_ about him that she can't quite pinpoint yet. Usually, compliments, of any kind, thrilled her, but Dustin's didn't sound genuine at all; it sounded like a man who was trying a tad too hard to say the right things to impress his new boss' daughter.

"It's nice to meet you," she allowed herself to say.

"Wonderful to finally meet you," Dustin replied. "Shelby talks about you all the time, and I imagine that I'll be seeing you around quite a bit and definitely at Regionals, right? Maybe you'll give us a run for our money."

"We'll definitely try," Rachel responded, not caring for his patronizing tone and swallowed back a smart reply.

"I bet," Dustin chuckled. "Well, I actually better go but I just wanted to make sure you got that so we can process it as soon as possible, Shelby. And it was lovely meeting you again, Rachel."

As soon as the door closed behind Dustin, Rachel spun around and slammed her hands on the desk. "Transfer papers? Are you taking in a new VA member mid-season? Who is it? Are they better than me?"

Her mouth agape at the outburst, Shelby narrowed her eyes at her daughter and shook her head firmly in disapproval. "Nuh-uh, _no_. Absolutely not."

"But _mom_ —"

"Rachel. No. Chinese—"

"Firewall or whatever," Rachel groaned. "Yeah, yeah. I know. But I—"

"Sit down right now, Rachel Barbra," Shelby commanded sharply, pointing to the couch with a stern finger.

"Ugh fine," the teenager yielded, dragging her feet languidly over to the couch then drooped down dramatically. "This is so unfair. I still don't understand why I had to come to rehearsal with you today. I was fine at home by myself."

"I beg to differ," Shelby replied hotly, fighting back the smile that seemed to form every time her daughter now called her house home _._ "Lest we forget your after-school activities this week."

"Well I don't know what else you expected me to do with all that free time," Rachel argued from her perch on the couch. "I can't use my phone, can't go on the internet, can't watch TV, can't do _anything._ I was so bored I even finished all my available homework for the rest of the month!"

"Oh, my poor baby," Shelby frowned in wry sympathy. "Perhaps now that you understand what you have to lose, you'll think twice the next time you sneak out and lie to your dear old mom."

"Mom, I _know,"_ Rachel whined in objection. "I get it. I have learned my lesson. I was wrong. You were right. And I am sorry. I'm so, so, _so_ sorry but will you _please_ just set me free. Give me time served or something. Anything. I'm begging you. Isn't it bad enough that you made me sell my Lady Gaga tickets and then made me pay for your dry cleaning? Or the never-ending chores. The house is literally so clean, mom. There's absolutely _nothing_ left to tidy or organize. I don't know what else to do!"

"So your solution to that this past week was to rearrange my entire closet on Monday, set my kitchen on fire on Tuesday, and then spend _two hours_ on a business call with my manager yesterday?" Shelby countered back, raising her eyebrow nearly to the ceiling. "You two planned an entire cabaret show for me, Rachel. What were you thinking?"

"The _real_ question is why you won't even consider it!" Rachel rebutted, crossing her arms and slouching back against the cushions. "It's not my fault Marty called the house phone, am I just supposed to start ignoring calls now, mother? And also, he is _awesome_. He has so many ideas! Mom, listen, there's this new original musical he wants to talk to you about and the composers literally _only_ want to work with _you_. It sounds amazing. You have to go back to New York, and you _must_ take me with you."

"The _only_ thing I _must_ do is finish up this paperwork so that we can go home," Shelby replied. "To our house, here in Lima, where we live."

"But _New York_ , mother," Rachel said as a matter-of-factly.

"But _nothing,_ daughter," Shelby replied, sucking in an impatient breath. "Rachel, I already have a job. You have school. Your dad is here. Our family is here. We have lives here that we can't just pick up and leave, my love. I know you know how difficult it is to make big changes. I understand the hype _and_ if in three-and-a-half years, you'd still like to move to New York for school, then I will support you all the way. But for right now, kid, you're stuck here with me… and still so very much _grounded._ "

Rachel groaned audibly as if she was in gut-wrenching pain, which caused Shelby to drop her head into her hands out of sheer frustration. They were at the tail-end of week two of Rachel's grounding and as expected, her one and only child had not made things easy. Since Leroy left, the girl teetered from being sullen and reserved to being perfectly normal and unaffected, and Shelby could not keep up if she tried. Rachel would wake up in the morning and be an absolute delight but then be sorely ill-tempered by the time the mother tucked her in for bed. Most recently, they've been sparring about commuting her sentence. But as much as Shelby wanted to give in, to salvage her own sanity, she knows she wouldn't be doing Rachel or herself any favors if she conceded now. She needed her daughter to realize the error of her ways and learn her lesson, no matter how difficult it was for the both of them.

"Mom?" Rachel called, growing uncomfortable at the thickening silence between them.

After inhaling a calming breath, Shelby lifted her head, smoothed down the wrinkles on her dress, and scooted the chair closer to the desk. Clasping her hands in front of her, she began to address the girl in a calm and even manner.

"Rach, I know you are unhappy with your grounding. You've made that more than clear, but like I've said before kid, this is what happens when you break the rules. There are consequences. And despite what you may think, I'm not doing this for my own sake. I don't necessarily enjoy taking privileges away from you. And I am not doing this to purposefully make you feel miserable, I can promise you that. I just want you to take this time to reflect about the decisions you made and how and why you're going to make the right ones in the future. Okay? I love you and I don't want to fight about this anymore."

"I love you too," Rachel responded without hesitation, sighing heavily. She chewed on the inside of her lip in thought, her stomach clenching at the realization that she's been stewing in her anger and frustration all week and unfairly taking it out on her mom. She had no one else to blame but herself for being in this situation, and there was no reason for her to be causing her mother so much grief for what was, at the end of the day, her own fault.

"And I-I'm sorry if I've been acting like a brat. I'm just not used to being in trouble like this. But I understand that I deserve it and why you're being so hard on me. I know I was raised better, but I haven't been acting like it. I should be trying to regain your trust, but I keep complaining and pushing your buttons. I don't really mean to, I'm just frustrated, but I am sorry, mom," Rachel said remorsefully, her eyes nervous and downcast at the end of the apology. "I will try better."

"Thank you, Rach," Shelby acknowledged and gave her daughter a weary smile. "Apology accepted. I know you're a good kid and I realize that things haven't been easy recently. But, on the bright side, you only have to get through the rest of this week, and next. That's only ten more days until it's all over and we can move on. However, there will be no more attempts at cooking in the meanwhile," she added, trying to lighten the mood.

"At least we know your fire alarm works," Rachel shrugged sheepishly. "But thanks mom, for being understanding and not, you know, killing me or anything yet. Dad sorta threatened to last week."

"Well we'll see after ten more days, but you are welcome," laughed Shelby. She briefly glanced down at the incomplete papers before pushing them away, deciding instead to take advantage of Rachel's agreeable and talkative mood at the moment. This was always how it went these days, especially now that she and Hiram were adhering to the joint custody arrangement and Rachel was spending the full week with her. She'd often find herself at a cross between her work and her daughter, and she was habitually choosing the latter now.

"How are you feeling about tomorrow, baby?"

"Oh, I don't know," the girl replied, suddenly finding a rapt interest in the throw blanket next to her. She unfolded it and placed it across her lap, as if she needed the extra layer of protection from the change of the subject. "Okay, I guess."

"Yeah?" Shelby inquired, leaning forward at her desk and resting her weight on her forearms. "It's okay to be nervous, baby. It is your first therapy appointment. Do you have any more questions for me?"

"No," Rachel shook her head, grazing her hand against the soft, fleece material. "I don't think so. I think I know what to expect from what you and dad have told me. But—I don't know mom, do you really think I have to go?"

"I don't think you _have_ to go, but I think that you should, my love," Shelby answered, her voice gentle and soft. "I think that it'll help you to have someone to talk to and to help you learn how to deal with everything that's going on in that pretty head of yours."

"I get that but is it really necessary?" Rachel questioned, ruminating it over in her head. "I'm perfectly capable of accessing my pain. I cry every time I sing a solo."

Despite the gravity of the conversation, the mother couldn't help the small laugh that escaped from her lips.

"That may be so, but I would still love for you to learn other ways to access _and_ cope with your pain," Shelby said, clearing her throat and swallowing back her amusement with the previous statement. "You said you were okay with this, Rach?"

"Yes, I am," she nodded, honoring her commitment to her parents that she'd at least try. "But you'll be with me, right?"

"I will be picking you up from school tomorrow to take you to your appointment, yes," Shelby confirmed. "And if it's what you want baby and the doctor says it's okay, then I would be more than happy to sit in this first session with you."

"Okay," Rachel said, slightly reassured about what's to come.

"Okay," Shelby parroted.

She peeked at her computer screen for the time and then flicked her eyes up at her daughter catching the girl in the middle of a wide and drawn-out yawn. She closed the folder and began collecting her work without another thought. "Alright kid, you win. Let's go home."

* * *

Closing the door to her dad's house behind her the following evening, Rachel's stomach growled reactively at the smell of savory spices perfumed in the air. She followed the aroma of dinner cooking to the kitchen to find Hiram standing at the sink focused on draining a steaming pile of freshly cooked pasta.

"Hey dad," Rachel greeted.

"Hi, sweetheart!" Hiram beamed, turning his attention to the sight of his little girl finally home. "I didn't even hear you come in."

"I just got here, everything smells so good," Rachel said, surveying the meal preparations happening around her.

"Dinner should be ready soon. What's all this?" Hiram inquired, wiping his hands down the apron draped over his neck then grabbed a box full of miscellaneous items from Rachel's hands. He set it down the island and began rummaging through it.

"Sheet music, books, and a bunch of mom's old notebooks from workshops and rehearsals when she worked in New York," Rachel said excitedly, standing on her tiptoes to peer into the box. "Isn't it cool? She said I could practice and study and spare you from enduring the same fate as her this past week."

"A saint, that woman," Hiram remarked, clutching his chest in gratitude and chuckling at the vexed look streaking across his daughter's face. "How was the week with your mom? Everything go okay?"

"Mhmm, it was good," Rachel nodded positively. "But I uh—the other day I forgot to take the plastic off a frozen pizza and accidentally set it on fire in the oven while mom was at rehearsal. She freaked out and then ran a red light on her way home."

"No way, I cannot believe she didn't tell me!" Hiram exclaimed, a merry and contagious laugh ripping from his throat. "And that reminds me, why didn't you invite her in for dinner like I told you to?"

"I did, but she said she had to get home to get ready," Rachel shrugged, walking over to inspect the pungent sea of red simmering at the stove. "She's going to watch Mr. Schue perform in Les Mis tonight with Aunt Kim and Frannie."

"They didn't invite you?" Hiram asked, offering the girl a taste of the homemade marinara sauce and grinned when Rachel hummed in approval.

"Mom actually did because they're making Quinn go. I think as punishment," Rachel laughed, leaning against the island to continue to observe the older man cook. "But I don't know, I wanted to come home and hang out... I missed you."

"Yeah?" Hiram questioned, setting down the spoon and turning to give the girl his undivided attention. "I missed you too, Tink."

"What?" The father prompted after a few moments of silence, noticing delight coloring Rachel's expression. He snapped the kitchen towel in his hand at the girl lightheartedly in order to elicit a response.

"Nothing," Rachel chuckled, tearing the towel away defensively. "You just haven't called me that in forever."

"No? Well you are our Tinkerbell. I'll never forget you telling your daddy and me that you need applause to live," Hiram recalled wistfully.

"What?" The teenager shrugged, her lips curving upwards at the memory. "It was true then and it's true now."

"Right, but you were four-years-old then, Rach," the father pointed out. He reached over and cupped her cheek with a light touch, wondering where the last ten years went.

"How was the therapy appointment, sweetheart?"

"It was okay," Rachel relaxed at the familiar comfort. "Mom said to let you know that she's made a standing appointment every Friday for now so you'll have to take me next week."

"Not a problem," Hiram ensured, dropping his hand to squeeze his daughter's arm reassuringly. "Did you like Dr. Montgomery?"

"Yes, I did," Rachel said truthfully. "She was easy to talk to and she made me feel comfortable. Mom likes her too, I think they clicked."

"Good, Rach," Hiram said, drawing on experience to search his daughter's eyes for any hints of dishonesty, relieved to find none. "That's really good. And I am very proud of you for being so open-minded about this. I think it'll help you process some of the things you've been through this past year and help you deal with some of the pressures or anxiety you feel."

"Yeah that's what mom said too. We did an intake assessment, so I mostly just talked about myself this time," Rachel shared.

Her eyes flickered down to the linen cloth she was still holding, nostalgia seizing her emotions almost instantly. She can't recall how or when it started, but Leroy had a habit of collecting decorative kitchen towels that were monogrammed with silly phrases on them, and Hiram made it his mission to gift him with every single one he could find. He must've collected dozens throughout the years, and Rachel found them all when she helped pack up the apartment a few weeks ago. They were sitting in storage now, ready to be forgotten, but somehow, perhaps in the shuffle of the division of the two homes, one made its way to Lima. A faint smile formed on Rachel's lips examining the one in her hands that said 'Chop It Like It's Hot' with a silhouette of a knife sewed on the center, slightly amused that this is the one that survived the purge.

She folded it neatly, as small as she could get it, and set it on the counter behind her, finally bringing her gaze up to meet her father's a moment later. "Can I ask you something, dad?"

"If it's to shorten your grounding, then the answer is an emphatic no," Hiram gave a half-smile, picking up on a shift in the mood. "Your mother scares me just as much as she scares you. Maybe even more."

"No, that's not it," Rachel replied with a soft chuckle. They've been through a lot in the past year, but the one thing she always found constant was her dad's ability to make her laugh. It's the one thing that hasn't changed, the one thing she hoped never would.

She stepped away and rounded the island, as if putting the distance between them would make it easier for her to share what she wanted to say. "I don't want to make you upset or anything, but I was just wondering," she paused, uncertain if either of them were ready for this conversation. "Do you ever miss daddy?"

Hiram swallowed thickly, his chest wringing at the sadness clouding the girl's features. The pain brightening his daughter's eyes effectively pulled him back to, what he's decided, was the worst moment in his life so far. Through it all, it wasn't the glaring feeling of defeat he woke up to the morning he realized that his marriage was over or even the profound emptiness he felt the first night he spent alone with Rachel in Lima that's stayed with him. It was the seconds after he and Leroy told their daughter they were separating that kept him up at night. It was how Rachel's breath hitched, the manner her brows crinkled in pure confusion, the way her lashes fluttered almost frantically to stave off the tears in that moment that left him reeling. It was knowing that he was inherently responsible for his daughter's heartbreak that haunted him mercilessly. It was how she was looking at him now that tore him up inside, splintering his already shattered heart into a million more pieces.

It was also the intensity in her gaze, and the kind of broken expression she wore that one didn't usually see in a teenager's face, that drove him to be genuinely honest with her, probably, for the first time in months. "Yes. I do miss him."

"Yeah?" Rachel asked desperately, drinking in the first bits of an unveiled reaction from her father.

Hiram nodded. "Of course I do."

"Okay," Rachel breathed then stared down at her feet, almost as if she was willing them to remain planted. "Because it's really important to me to feel like I'm not alone in this," she managed to choke out, missing how the color drained from her father's face instantaneously at the admission.

"And it's important to me to feel like I'm not the only one acting like I lost something," she continued, not waiting for Hiram's acknowledgement before plunging forward with her thoughts. "And that I'm not the only one who's missing us and missing how things used to be… because you and daddy were my best friends, and we did everything together. But sometimes it feels like I lost you both and it's not fair," she whispered, shaking her head furtively. "Because I feel like I'm the only one who cares."

"You're not," Hiram replied as convincingly as he could, blinking back the stinging pressure building in his eyes. He moved immediately to erase the distance between them and gathered up his daughter in a crushing embrace, lifting her small frame off the ground. "You're not alone, Tink. And I care. I promise you that I care."

* * *

After a relatively quiet weekend at home with her dad, Rachel sat in the computer lab on Monday morning fixated on printing out a copy of the English paper she had due first period. With absolutely nothing else to do, courtesy of her perpetual grounding, she spent the better part of the last two days writing it, actually quite pleased with the result of her thorough work.

She downloaded the essay from her email, clicked print, and gathered her belongings to wait for it by the Xerox. Grabbing and stapling the assignment, she strolled out of the library right as the five-minute warning bell rang.

She was halfway down the hall when a frigid cold blast hit her from behind. Rachel shrieked in utter shock and turned around right in time for Karofsky to swipe the paper in her hands, crumple it up, and toss it in a nearby trash can.

"Better get to class, loser," the football player laughed viciously, pushing the girl before walking away with a cruel pep in his step. "Wouldn't want to be late."

Still rooted to her spot, Rachel only trembled with rage, a vortex of anger and frustration swirling at an alarming rate inside of her. For a few moments, all she could see was red and she only noticed Santana standing in front of her after the cheerleader placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Holy crap, Berry. Are you okay?" Santana asked, marginally concerned by her teammate's increasingly labored breathing.

After not receiving a response, Santana noticed Rachel's gaze drop down to the slushie in her other free hand and watched resentment light up brown eyes. She also pivoted slightly to follow Rachel's sight land on Karofsky collecting books at his locker a few yards away.

"Here," Santana offered the weaponized drink. "He totally deserves it."

"No," Rachel shook her head firmly, still breathless with anger. "No. That would be too easy. I-I think I have a better idea."

* * *

 **A/N: Bit of a set up chapter, but I'll be back soon with more. The sincerest thanks for reading and for dropping your encouraging notes! It warms this writer's heart.**


	20. Chapter 20

Shelby's Range Rover sped effortlessly down the wet street, the salt and water splashing up onto the sides as she made her way to McKinley. The frantic rhythm of the windshield wiper matched the rate of the pounding in her chest that's been happening since she listened to the three voicemails that Will Schuester left on her cell phone during rehearsal.

She slowed down her speed as she entered the school zone and pulled into the long driveway at the front of building, not at all caring if she was violating any parking restrictions. She turned the car off and sat in silence for a moment listening to the cadence of the raindrops drumming on the roof. She had calmed down considerably on the ride over, but she was still thoroughly confused about what happened. And if there's one thing that Shelby disliked the most, it's not knowing what was going on with her child.

Sighing, the mother gathered her things, got out of the car, and firmly slammed the door behind her. She wrapped her trench coat close to her body and briskly made her way to the building hoping to escape the quickly falling rain.

She crashed through the front doors with a determined purpose and began to make her way across the school towards McKinley's choir room. Once she arrived, she peered in through the small window on the door and watched Will speaking heatedly to Kurt, Noah, Santana, Quinn, and she assumed, Rachel as well, whose frame was obstructed by the choir teacher.

Deciding to wait to let her presence be known, she walked to the wall opposite the choir room doors and leaned against it before taking out her phone and texting the fellow coach. She waited a few minutes, tapping the seconds away with her stilettos against the tiled floor. When Will opened the door a beat later, she uncrossed her arms and raised her eyebrows questioningly.

"Hi Shelby, thanks for coming," the man greeted with a weary smile. "I'm just at a loss of what to do. I'm not entirely sure what happened, but the kids have closed ranks and no one will fess up."

"We'll get it sorted out," Shelby assured. "But can we talk about it in a few minutes? Do you mind bringing Rachel out here? I just want to make sure she's alright first. Please?"

Picking up on the worry laced in the mother's voice, Will nodded his agreement. "Of course. But I think I should warn you, she hasn't changed. I've been trying to get them to explain but no one's budging."

"Okay?" Shelby said, ignoring the millions of questions popping up in her head. "That's fine. Just ask her to come out, please. And the other kids let their parents know that they're staying late?"

"I canceled rehearsal for everyone else, so we have them for a little more than an hour," Will answered.

"Perfect. That's plenty of time to get to the bottom of this."

* * *

As soon as Rachel walked out, Shelby instantly clenched her jaw to keep it from plummeting to the ground. To say she was unprepared for the sight of her kid covered in an unknown red and blue gooey substance would be an understatement. She grimaced taking in the sticky residue donned all over the girl's skin and clothes. "Rachel— _what_ , are you okay?"

"Mom, listen, I can explain," Rachel began, taking a half step backwards and lifting her hands up in defense. "It's not my fault. I was handling it. We were just taking care of it but everything's okay now—or I think it will be. Just please don't be mad, please—"

"Hey," Shelby interrupted, shaking her head worriedly. She erased the distance between them and gently swiped away the hair stuck to the sides of her daughter's face. "That's not what I asked, kid. Are you okay?" she said quietly, scanning the teenager from head-to-toe.

Apart from the sticky substance drenched all over her, at least Rachel looked physically unharmed. It was emotionally that the mother was concerned about.

"Y-you're not mad?" Rachel stammered, immensely caught off-guard by the older woman's reaction.

"I—" Shelby paused, searching her mind for the right words. "I don't have enough information to be mad. All I see right now in front of me is you, my kid, covered in _something._ And the only thing that matters to me at this moment is if you are alright, Rach. Are you?"

Rachel sighed and hung her head, unable to take the concern in the woman's eyes. She wanted to be honest, but she wasn't ready yet for her mother to know the truth. Rachel _didn't_ want her to know the truth, at least for as long as she can help it. "Yes. I'm okay," she said, rather unconvincingly.

Shelby pursed her lips and nodded, detesting the fact that her daughter was lying to her face right now. "Okay, Rach. We can talk about it later. Here," she offered a tote bag. "Mr. Schue told me to bring you a change of clothes. Please get cleaned up, changed, and then come back to the choir room after you are done."

"No, it's okay," Rachel declined, shaking her head in objection. "I already have my extra clothes to change into in my locker..."

Shelby's eyebrow quirked up as Rachel's voice trailed off. "Extra clothes?"

"Nothing!" Rachel flashed a sheepish smile and snatched the bag from the woman's hands, walking away before Shelby could formulate a response. "Thanks, mom. I'll be right back!"

Fighting the urge to roll her eyes at her daughter's far too quick evasive maneuvers, Shelby watched the girl's retreating form for a few seconds before releasing a sigh in frustration.

Her daughter's been lying to her. For days. And now she was going to find out why.

* * *

The moment Shelby entered the choir room, a bright flash of lightning streaked across the window and the roar of thunder boomed the room into silence. The fluorescent lights flickered momentarily and the four teenagers sitting in the front row whipped their heads to find Shelby standing at the door.

"Holy shit!" Quinn jumped in her seat, extremely rattled by Shelby's unexpected appearance.

"Watch the language, Lucy Quinn," Shelby chided while she focused on shedding her still-damp jacket and hanging it on the hook at the back of the door.

" _Lucy!?"_ Santana questioned, turning to her best friend in shock. "Your first name is Lucy?"

"Hey," Puck said, craning his head to look over Shelby's shoulder. "Where did Berry go?"

"One hundred percent guarantee that Coach Corcoran killed her," Santana whispered to no one in particular.

"And she's going to kill us all too if you don't shut up San," Quinn warned through gritted teeth.

Kurt nodded furiously. "I second that."

"I can hear everything you're saying," Shelby said while she crossed the room, stopping right outside of Will's office to address the students. "Rachel is in the bathroom. She will be joining you shortly. And I suggest you all get your story straight because if there is one thing that I _absolutely do not tolerate…_ it's lying."

Slamming the door shut behind her, Shelby found Will wrapping up a phone call. Attempting to give him some privacy, she turned her back and studied the cramped space, deeming the room not even half the size of her office at Carmel.

Once she heard him hang up, she sat down in the chair opposite of the choir teacher, her eyes scanning the clutter all over his desk before landing on Will's incomprehensible expression.

"Do your Vocal Adrenaline kids ever get picked on at school?"

"Maybe only by me," Shelby chuckled jokingly.

"No. That's not what I meant," Will said, scratching the back of his neck in contemplation. "I mean, do they ever get bullied by other students. Maybe by the jocks?"

"No," Shelby said with total conviction. "Not that I've seen. My kids are national champions. They rule that school. Besides, we have a zero-tolerance policy on bullying. It's not really an issue at Carmel."

"Well that's not the case here," Will sighed, noticing the woman's smile falter. "The less popular kids here like Artie, Kurt, Tina… and Rachel…get bullied almost regularly. Sometimes they even get slushied."

"Slushied?" Shelby questioned hotly.

Will paused and shifted in his seat uncomfortably, bracing himself for the mother's reaction. "The hockey and football players, sometimes the Cheerios, like to, um, assert their popularity over the other kids by throwing slushies at them. There's this unspoken hierarchy around here and it's how they like to keep things in order."

"By throwing drinks at someone's face? That's sick," Shelby said, not quite believing what she was hearing. "And this happens to Rachel?"

"To Rachel, to Kurt, to the other glee kids pretty often. It's gotten so bad that I think they have to keep toiletries and extra clothes in their lockers."

As the pieces began to come together, Shelby instantly felt nauseous. Her daughter was being bullied? That badly bullied? And she had no idea about it? Sure, she had an inkling that there was something suspect going on with Rachel at school, but _this_ goes far beyond what she could've imagined. This was beyond the red lines. This was a thinly veiled form of physical violence that was flying under the radar.

"For how long?" Shelby asked, fire in her voice.

Will leaned back in his seat. The anger emanating off of the woman wasn't completely unexpected but he still found himself at a loss for words. The tall, beautiful star almost appeared majestic in her fury.

"I-I don't know, for as long as I've been here, I guess," he stammered.

"And how long has this been happening to Rachel?"

"Months?"

" _Months_?" Shelby breathed. She was so disturbed. "This has been going on for _months_ and no one's done anything about it? You're telling me that not a single teacher here has done anything to stop this? What is the principal doing about this? What the hell are _you_ doing about this, Will? Those kids are your responsibility. Rachel, when she's in these halls, is _your_ responsibility."

The lack of response from the teacher ignited a burning rage in her chest. Nearly suffocating from her anger, she stood up abruptly, the legs of the chair screeching loudly against the floor, and forced herself to breathe. Will felt about two inches tall as he looked up guiltily at Shelby scowling at him with her hands on her hips. His stomach knotted watching the mother's eyes narrow and her eyebrows crook precariously.

He swallowed audibly. "I know Shelby. Believe me, I know. And believe me when I say that I feel gutted over this. I know I'm part of the problem. It just happens so often that I'm getting immune to it, and I know that's not right. But I've tried. I've tried to talk to the other teachers about this and we do what we can. I've tried talking to Figgins about this but he—he doesn't take me seriously. He doesn't take us, the glee club, seriously. We're not like you and VA. We don't have the resources, the finances, or the support. Our entire existence depends on a man who couldn't care less about a music or arts education, so I have to choose my battles with Figgins, because these kids _need_ the glee club. Figgins can take all of that away. He's already threatening to have us disbanded if we don't win at Regionals."

Shelby steadied her breath as she took in the sincere concern etched all over the man's face. She felt sick over the entire situation. She peered through the window right in time to catch her daughter crossing the room to join her friends. How could she not have known that all this was happening?

Sighing, she felt some of the anger drain out of her and she softened her entire stance. "Why didn't she tell me?"

"I don't know," Will shook his head sympathetically. "Rachel came to me last week and told me the slushie-ing got worse for her. I promise you Shelby, I encouraged her to tell you or her dads about this and she assured me she had. I'm sorry I should've followed up again but I thought she just needed to vent about it."

Shelby felt like she just got a sucker punch to her solar plexus at that remark. Was she dropping the ball that much that her kid was actively choosing to talk to her glee coach over her own mother? "So what happened today?" She asked, pushing away the rejection on her mind.

"That I'm not sure," Will said, sweeping a hand through his hair. It's been a long day. And the end seemed nowhere near in sight. "All I know is that I found Rachel covered in slushie and those five out there yelling over each other outside of the boys' locker room at the end of the day, and when I asked them all to explain they all clammed up. But from what I've been picking up on and observing all week, if I had to guess, is that they cooked up some sort of way to get back at some of the football players. There's one in particular I know that likes to torment the glee kids. I don't know, though. I'm not certain. They're not talking to me. But I can't just let it go. I don't want it to reach a boiling point."

Shelby nodded her head diffidently, recalling her daughter's pleas to "handle it herself." She wouldn't put it past her kid to whip up a revenge plan. " _They_ might not be talking, but _one_ of them will."

The glee coach only looked at the woman questioningly.

"A chain is only as strong as its weakest link, Will."

"Okay… so if we talk to them individually, one of them is bound to fess up?"

"Exactly," Shelby said, a wicked grin spreading across her face.

Will chuckled lightly at the excited gleam in Shelby's eyes. "Can I ask you for a favor though? Do you mind talking to the kids by yourself? I just got a call from one of my colleagues asking if I can close up the resource center for her. The storm blew out the power at her house, so she had to run out. I know I don't have the right to ask you for help after I—"

"I'll take care of it," Shelby cut him off. "Go. I can handle it. We can talk about everything else later."

Will moved instantaneously to follow orders. He collected his things and began to make his way out but paused at the door. "Who are you going to talk to first?"

Shelby looked out at her persons of interests in the next room and took a moment to strategize. "Kurt," she decided quickly. "Can you ask him to come in here on your way out?"

"Sure," he agreed, butterflies fluttering in his stomach. He sure as heck would not be want to be on the receiving end of a Shelby Corcoran interrogation. The last ten minutes have been effective enough at fraying his nerves. "Good luck, I'll be back soon."

* * *

Kurt stared down at his hands, obviously attempting to avoid Shelby's inquiring gaze. He sighed deeply, extremely displeased at the current situation he was in. All he's wanted, ever since his dad took him to see a theater production of Annie when he was six, was to be in the company of Broadway royalty. He wanted facetime with the greats. And Shelby Corcoran was not just great, she was a legend. But instead of being thrilled of the one-on-one time with the former-Broadway star, all he wanted to do in this particular moment was run as far away as possible. Because not only is he possibly in trouble with _the_ Shelby Corcoran, now his idol is also going to find out how pathetic he actually is. Fantastic.

"Kurt, will you please look at me?" Shelby asked kindly.

Kurt brought his head up, unnerved by the woman's gentle tone. "Yes, sorry C-Coach, uh, Miss, Corcoran."

"Kurt, you've slept over at my house. We've had dinners together. I drive you home all the time," Shelby pointed out in amusement. "I think it's okay for you to call me Shelby."

The teenager flushed red and smiled nervously. "Sorry… Shelby."

"It's okay," Shelby said, unclasping her hands and lounging back in Will's leather swivel chair in a relaxed manner. "How are you doing? I haven't seen you around as much since Rach has been grounded. Sorry about that."

"Good?" Kurt replied, thoroughly confused by the pleasantries. He knows that he wasn't summoned in here for small talk.

"Good. How's your dad doing?"

"He's doing well." He shifted in his seat and twiddled with the hem of his brand new printed Alexander McQueen button down. "Thank you for the recipe book, by the way. It's been really helpful."

"Of course. I don't know if Rachel's mentioned it, but her grandpa, my dad, was pretty sick too a while back. And we had to help him adjust to a lot of lifestyle changes including eating a healthier, well-balanced diet. My mom and I found a lot of good recipes in that book that I think are delicious but also heart-healthy for your dad."

Kurt nodded appreciatively. "Yeah, we tried a couple of them last week and I think he liked that it didn't taste like he was just eating cardboard."

"Good," Shelby laughed. "I'm glad. Kurt, can I ask you something? And I'd really appreciate it if you were honest with me."

"Uh—okay, sure."

"Does your dad know? About the bullying?"

The way the teenager's face blanched told Shelby all she needed to know.

"I think that he should, Kurt. I think your dad would want to know what's happening."

Kurt released a heavy sigh, drooping his shoulders. "I know. I don't like keeping things from him, but he's just got a lot going on right now. He's still recovering and I don't want to stress him out any more than I have to. I don't want to bother him. But it's okay, I can handle it anyway."

Shelby nodded, completely understanding the boy's train of thought. It was the logic she employed when she was in the thick of it with her dad. But it took years, distance from that situation, and a lot of hindsight to change her perspective on that. "I understand Kurt. I do. But I don't think that this is something that we can just sweep under the rug. You're getting hurt, Kurt. That's not okay. Not even in the slightest is that okay, and I don't want you or Rachel or anyone else to ever think that's okay. None of you deserve this. You have a right to feel safe at school, and you definitely do not deserve to handle this on your own. It's our responsibility, mine, and your dad, and your teachers to end this. Do you understand?"

"Yes," Kurt said quietly. He ran his palms against his lap and picked off the linen off his slim black chinos. "Are you going to tell my dad then?"

"No," Shelby replied. "You are. I think he should hear from it you. Rachel didn't tell me, and I—I would have liked to have learned about it from her."

"She was only looking out for me, you know," Kurt blurted out. "Dave Karofsky only really started picking on her after she stood up for me last fall…" The teenager gasped dramatically once he realized what he divulged and placed his hand over his mouth.

Shelby jumped instantly at that piece of information. She sat upright and leaned forward over the desk. "Dave Karofsky? He's the one that's been slushie-ing you guys?"

"I—uh—maybe?" Kurt shrugged. "Please don't make me tell you! Puck might kill me. Santana scares me. And I promised Rachel I wouldn't say anything. And also, after what happened earlier, I really don't think Karofsky's going to be bothering Rachel and me anymore… Please don't make me confess because I'm certain Santana will end me and I have so much to live for. The Nordstrom semi-annual sale is this weekend!"

Shelby groaned and dropped her head into her hands. As much as she wanted to prod the boy for more information, she usually doesn't like to prey on the weak. It's not as satisfying. And Kurt's already been through enough.

"Fine," she grumbled. "But this conversation is not over, young man. Keeping this from us wasn't the right thing to do, so I would really love for you to talk to your dad this weekend. Because if you don't, I will, Kurt. I promise you that."

"Okay, I will," he agreed. "I'm sorry, Shelby."

" _I'm_ sorry," she said, shaking her head. "You're thoughtful, smart, talented, not to mention fabulously well-dressed, Kurt. Don't _ever_ let anyone make you feel otherwise. Rachel's lucky, because I would have loved to have a friend like you when I was in high school. And _I'm_ sorry that not everybody appreciates how great you are. But your dad, Mr. Schue, and I will take care of it. We will handle it. And everything will be alright."

Kurt broke out into a wide grin in response because for the first time, in a very long time, he found himself actually believing her.

* * *

Puck's not going to lie. Objectively, for a mom, Shelby Corcoran was pretty hot. But he couldn't let that distract him because she was also his newly sworn arch-nemesis. Ever since she ruined his epic New Year's Eve party. And then made him tell his mother about it, who then proceeded to place babysitting duties on him indefinitely.

Slouching down in the seat across from Shelby, he crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes at the fun-killer. There was no way in hell he was going to talk. He did what he had to do.

Sure, he's bullied dweebs like Kurt in the past and maybe he's thrown a band geek or two in a dumpster, but that was before. That was before joining the glee club. Before he got to know Kurt and Rachel and Artie and everyone else he used to make fun of. Before the New Directions changed everything for him. Now he had a reason _not_ to bully. Because one, all the singing and dancing actually kept him from pretty preoccupied from getting into trouble and two, he _hated_ seeing what Karofsky and Azimio did to his friends. Also because it wasn't right the way he noticed how Kurt would brace himself before he walked out of the classroom and into the hallways, so that's why when Rachel and Quinn asked him for help, he agreed. He simply did what he had to do.

"Noah, please sit up," Shelby ordered.

"I'm not going to say anything," Puck said, straightening up in his seat. "Karofsky's an ass. He thinks he rules the school, and he needed to be taken down a peg."

"And how exactly did you all manage to do that?"

"We didn't hurt anyone or like do anything illegal, if that's what you're concerned about," Puck said. "Berry wouldn't let us. She's kind of a stickler for the rules and a total square like that… no offense. I didn't even really do anything, honestly. Just sorta fanned the flames. Karofsky basically burned himself."

Shelby lifted an eyebrow, impatience slowly grating on her nerves. "Care to explain any of that?"

"Nah," Puck shrugged but instantly regretted it the moment the word fell from his lips. He subconsciously scooted the chair a couple inches back as if that would protect him from the furious green eyes shooting daggers his way.

"Okay, so listen," Puck said, blushing deep red at how his voice slightly trembled. "I play football right."

Shelby sighed. "What does football have to do with any of this?"

"Sort of everything," Puck began. "Because let's just say you were drafted to a team that wasn't your first pick. You know, you don't like the players, you hate the way they play the game, you even think the quarterback is full of crap. But it's your team. You don't quit. You don't talk to the press. You don't bitch to the coach. You just go out there every Sunday. And you make the blocks. And you take the hits. And you play to win. You show up, and you suit up, and you play. Cause it's your freakin' team."

* * *

"Hi Santana, please take a seat," Shelby instructed when the cheerleader entered the room. Needing to stretch her legs, she was standing and leaning against the front of Will's desk.

"No thank you," Santana said, crossing her arms as she faced Shelby. "I won't be in here long."

The older woman shook her head and sucked in a sharp breath in a mixture of annoyance and frustration. She doesn't know what kind of operation Will was running here, but her Vocal Adrenaline kids would _never_. She mimicked Santana, folded her arms across her chest, and regarded the teenager in a stern manner. Two can play at this game.

As the seconds turned into minutes, Santana began to fidget anxiously while the silence in the room intensified. The torturous way Shelby was looking at her made her skin clammy and blood hot. She couldn't believe the position she was in. She didn't even want to join glee club. And she sure as hell didn't want to like it. Or the people in it. _Especially_ not Rachel Berry. But somehow she had. For better or for worse, she was now a show choir nerd and that meant helping protect what they built and taking down asshats like Karofsky in the process. And she wasn't going to apologize for that. Or get in trouble for that. No way, no sir.

Steeling herself against the woman's piercing glare, Santana pushed out a loaded breath between her lips and scuffed the tiled floor with her sneaker. She can admit. Shelby was pretty damn intimidating. And the quiet between them was even more disconcerting, but she was not going to be the one to break it. That's for sure.

* * *

With a shaky hand, Quinn twisted the doorknob, eased herself into the office, and shut the door behind her with a soft click. She remained rooted to her spot until Shelby gestured to the seat in front of her. She padded over begrudgingly and sank down.

"Shelby, I told Rachel to tell you. I swear I did."

The woman lifted an impatient hand and waited for the girl to cease her squirming. "Mr. Schuester said that sometimes some of the Cheerios slushie the other kids? Have you ever done it?"

Quinn raked her teeth against her bottom lip, hard enough to draw blood. She could lie, but she also knew full-well that Shelby would know that she wasn't being honest. She licked her lips and swallowed hard. "Okay, yes. But only once! When I first started on the team and the seniors made me do it."

"Lucy Quinn!" Shelby admonished, her voice dripping with disappointment. "Nobody can _make_ you do anything, you knew what you were doing and you should be ashamed. I am so—Q _,_ you _know_ better. You were raised better than that. And after what you went through during grade school, you'd think that you'd know better than to treat others that way."

"I know," Quinn dropped her head in shame and only looked up warily when the woman didn't respond a few seconds later. "I'm sorry. I do regret it, but you should also know then how hard I've worked to be on the Cheerios. And how hard I've worked to be on the other side of all of that. I'm popular now, so I had to do it. This is just how it is and always will be around here, Shelby. But I look out for Rachel. I promise. That's why I got San and Puck to help."

Shelby shook her head in staunch protest. "No. I refuse to accept that 'that's just how it is.' You shouldn't have to look out for Rachel in the first place because she and Kurt and everyone else who's getting bullied around here should be able to come to school and feel safe and not have to worry about getting drinks thrown in their faces or being shoved against lockers every day. That's absolutely not how it should be, Quinn, and you know that."

Quinn only nodded. She's aware that what was happening at McKinley wasn't right. But she's starting to realize more and more that high school was just a survival of the fittest. There was only so much she could do if some people weren't cut out for it. But she also knew surviving also meant being smart and creative and resourceful. It meant learning how to solve problems when no one else was interested in helping.

"What did you guys do?" Shelby asked rather calmly. "I know that the five of you came up with some way to get back at this Dave Karofsky. And if you tell me, I can work with you. I can talk to Mr. Schuester. At this point, I'm not even trying to punish any of you. Because, truthfully, as far as I'm concerned, that kid probably deserved what he got. But you have to talk to me Quinn, so I can help fix this if I need to."

"I can't tell you," the teenager said decisively. If Puck can somehow come out of a Shelby Shakedown alive, she can also keep her mouth shut. "And we don't need help, I think it's fine now."

"That's what I figured you'd say," Shelby said with a poker face. "Well then, if you can't tell me, then I think I know someone that you can't refuse to speak to."

In record speed, Quinn's pupils flared, heart rate increased, and jaw slackened knowing _exactly_ who Shelby was talking about. "Oh my god, you can't."

"What do you think your mom's doing right now, Q? She's probably home by now, right? It's Friday, which means that she's probably getting ready for dinner with my parents. Think we should give her a call?"

"Shelby, no! Please don't tell her. She'll kill me. Like actually murder me if she finds out about the slushie-ing and the… everything else. And I just got ungrounded recently for the sneaking out! Please, this is so not fair!"

Stamping down a smirk, Shelby merely shrugged her shoulders. "Then tell me what happened between you all and Dave Karofsky this week."

"I can't—I don't want to," Quinn refused, her voice full of sheer panic. She mustered all the strength she could gather deep down inside of her. She was not going to be the one to break. Santana would not let her live this down.

"Fine," Shelby responded, hitting the speaker button on the phone on the desk. "Then let's fill your mother in on what's been going on at school. I think I still have your house number memorized but please correct me if I'm wrong."

Shelby paused and stared at Quinn, noting the nervous energy exuding from the teen. She adjusted the phone so that it was placed between them and slowly moved her fingers to punch in the area code, four… one… nine… each beep of the numbers being dialed permeated the thick silence. "One last chance, Quinn," Shelby halted, her perfectly manicured finger hovering over the dial pad.

Quinn melted into her seat and prayed right then that the ground would just open up now and swallow her whole. "Shelby…"

"Wrong answer," the woman replied then rapidly dialed the rest of the number.

The jarring sound of the line ringing caused Quinn's panic to automatically skyrocket through the roof. She jumped up, startling the older woman in the process, and slammed down the end call button. "Okay fine! I'll talk! Just please don't tell my mom!"

Shelby couldn't help the triumphant expression that formed on her face. Thank goodness for Judy Fabray. "I promise to _consider_ not telling your mom. Depending on what you tell me. Now please explain."

The teenager groaned. "I can't really explain it in a way that won't make you glare at me."

"Quinn!"

"Okay, fine," she relented, mentally cringing because she knew that Puck and Santana were never going to let her forget this. "Ugh, I'll tell you."

A few minutes later, Shelby rested her elbows on the desk, hung her head and gently massaged her temples in an attempt to alleviate a pending headache. She inhaled until her lungs burned and exhaled slowly before lifting her gaze to meet Quinn's.

Reclining back in her seat a moment later, she nodded slowly in understanding as she let Quinn's rambling and long-winded confession marinate in her head. "Okay, that was a lot of information all at once, so let's go over this one more time. You all thought that you needed to 'put Karofsky in his place' by 'exposing' him?"

"Right," Quinn confirmed. "He's kind of terrible to everyone, so we all just wanted to get teachers and other students on our side."

"So talk me through this again please—Kurt?"

"Is in a lot of classes with him, and Karofsky always steals his homework. This week, we had an essay due in English and a lab report due in Bio. Kurt gave him another version of the paper that had like plagiarized analysis from SparkNotes for him to turn in and put in all the wrong data in the lab report. Karfosky's lazy and he never checked, so he got in trouble for cheating and then Mrs. Hunter began to realize that he's been copying answers this entire time and she told the other teachers."

"And Puck?"

"Already had beef with Karofsky for always making fun of him and Finn for joining glee club. But Karofsky honestly makes fun of everyone, including the hockey players. And the football and the hockey team don't like each other, so Puck told Rick Nelson, who's on the hockey team, all the smack that Karofsky's been talking about him to stir drama. Rick confronted him about it and they got into a fight in the parking lot on Tuesday. Karofsky lost and was humiliated. Also Coach Beiste had to stop the fight and suspended him from winter practices."

"And then you and Santana got your cheerleading coach involved?"

"Okay, this was San's idea. But you absolutely cannot tell Coach because she may actually murder us or kick us off the team. I don't think Coach exactly likes the bullying that goes on but she also just sort of looks the other way. Santana thought that the only way to get her involved is if she was directly affected. So yesterday, I distracted Coach and walked her over to the cafeteria. At the same time, Santana was with Karofsky and she told him that Rachel was walking towards their direction and she encouraged him to slushie her as she came around the corner. Except it wasn't Rachel, it was Coach who he slushied instead. San just played it off like she had no idea and Coach was actually enraged. She told us that she was going to get rid of the slushie machine."

"Rachel's role in all of this?"

"It was her idea to take down Karofsky from different vantage points so that it would stick. And to target him because he's really the only one who likes to torment the glee club. Azimio and the other guys only follow his lead. And Rachel's also been obsessing over this idea that she thinks there's some sort of reason why he's being so horrible to Kurt, so she's been doing 'deep background' or whatever Puck calls it. Anyway, he confronted her about everything that's been happening to him after the final bell earlier and he slushied her...again... and I heard Rachel lost it and followed him into the boys' locker room. I guess Kurt ran in there to help her, but I don't really know what happened in there cause San, Puck, and I were coming from Spanish and we got there too late."

"So why did Mr. Schue say he found all five of you fighting earlier?"

"Because Rachel wouldn't tell us what happened with them and Karofsky. All she said was that he said he'd leave them alone. And Santana laid into her about it and Puck and I were just telling San to let it go. I don't know, we all kind of just panicked. Honestly, I don't really care if Rach found out any dirt on him. He's irrelevant to me as long as he quits picking on everyone."

"So let me get this straight, essentially, you all found a way to get back at this kid by not exactly doing anything directly to him, but by just sort of letting everyone else handle it?"

"Yes, exactly," Quinn nodded. "So, technically, we can't even really get in trouble because it's not like we were the ones who cheated or got into a fight or slushied Coach Sylvester. We might've set him up, but Karofsky did everything else to himself by making all the wrong choices."

"Okay," Shelby said.

"Okay? That's all you have to say?"

"Okay," the woman repeated. Shelby simply stared at Quinn while the corners of lips curled involuntarily. Fighting down her amusement with everything she had, her cheeks swelled momentarily with pressure before she burst out into an abrupt and raucous fit of laughter.

"So..." Quinn chuckled apprehensively at Shelby's entirely unexpected reaction. "You're not going to tell my mom, right?"

* * *

After speaking with Will and sending the rest of the kids home, Shelby waited outside of the choir room once again as Rachel went off to collect the rest of her belongings from her locker.

She fidgeted with the umbrella in her hand, tapping it against the wall as she deliberated how to move forward from here. After getting all the information she needed from Quinn, she opted to just speak to her daughter at home realizing that there was going to be a lengthy discussion ahead of them.

And despite the fact that the kids thought that they had "handled" it, she knew that she needed to call attention to and address the bullying issue at McKinley because she refused to send her child to a school where her physical and emotional wellbeing was being threatened. She needed assurance of Rachel's safety, needed the toxic culture to change, and needed accountability from the adults in charge. She wanted someone to answer for the abuse that was being swept under the rug on the daily. In fact, she was going to demand it.

Rachel hesitated as she approached the older woman whose face was hardened in concentration. "Ready to go, mom?" She asked timidly.

"Yup," Shelby blinked and turned her attention to her daughter. "Do you have everything you need for the weekend?"

"Yes," the girl nodded, slightly unhinged by the clipped tone. While she somehow evaded her mother's interrogation, she's aware that she had to answer to the woman soon enough. "Are you dropping me off at home? It's dad's weekend."

"I just called him and I will be taking you to your therapy appointment and then you are sleeping over tonight. You and I have a lot to talk about later."

"Oh," Rachel pursed her lips in a worried frown, hating the clear tension between them at the moment. "Are you mad at me or something?"

Shelby regarded her daughter solemnly and sighed. She was angry. That she knows. She was livid that this was happening. She was infuriated that nobody was doing anything about it. And she was beyond frustrated that she was just finding out about it all now.

"I don't know, Rach. Maybe a little but I just wish that—"

"But _why_!" Rachel exclaimed in objection, disregarding the fact that she was raising her voice at her mother. "I'm the victim here! I'm the one who's been getting called names and getting slushies thrown in my face for weeks!"

" _Exactly_!" Shelby couldn't help but yell back, her mounting anger quickly fueled her tongue. "For weeks, Rachel! It's been happening _for weeks_ and you didn't tell me. This could've ended weeks ago, Rachel. I could've helped you. Your dads and I could've fixed this. We would've taken care of it, so I am angry because I just don't understand why you would have rather endured all of that for so long than just come talk to me. And I asked you, Rachel! How many times did I ask you if there was anything going on at school that I needed to be aware of? How many times did you lie to me and say no!?"

Breathless, Shelby's heart hammered inside her chest and immediately twisted in guilt taking in her daughter's big brown eyes glazed with tears. The girl practically looked like she had just slapped her across the face.

"Alright, I'm sorry," Rachel said with a shaky voice, full of hurt. "But you don't have to yell at me."

Shelby shook her head, appalled at herself for lashing out. "I'm sorry Rachel, I'm just frustrated," she ran a hand over her face and forced herself to calm down, drawing in a long, deep breath to settle her emotions. "I didn't mean to. I'm—will you just please just meet me out in the car? I'll be out in a few minutes."

She offered the car keys and umbrella and didn't miss how her daughter had unwittingly taken a step back and was now avoiding eye contact.

"Fine," Rachel said, snatching the objects away from the woman's hands harshly. If her mother was going to be this upset, so was she.

"Rachel—" Shelby reached out and grabbed her arm.

"No. I'm going to the car," she jerked away from the gentle hand and stormed away in a matching flurry of anger and frustration.

After Rachel's frame turned the corner, Shelby blew out an aggravated breath. She allowed herself a moment to regroup and rein in emotions that were undoubtedly getting the better of her. When she felt like she had regained some semblance of calm, she straightened her spine, squared her shoulders, and strode down the hallway, the heels of her expensive shoes clicking purposively on the way to the Principal's office.

* * *

As soon as she was done dealing with Figgins, leaving him with an unbreakable vow that that wasn't their last conversation about the issue, Shelby practically sprinted out to the car as the guilt over her outburst assaulted her conscience.

Running again through the rain, she flung open the door to the Range Rover to the sight of her daughter crying softly in the passenger seat. Shelby eased herself into the car, set her purse behind her, and turned to face the teenager.

"Rach I'm—"

"Did you talk to Principal Figgins?" Rachel asked, punctuating the question with a loud sniffle.

"I did," the mother nodded, loathing that she was the reason for the big tears filling wide, heartbroken eyes.

"Mom please don't make me transfer," the girl pleaded. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you, but I don't want to leave McKinley. I can deal with it. And Karofsky said he's not going to do anything to me anymore. Please don't make me switch schools. Even with the bullying, I'm just getting used to it and I really don't want anything else to change. Please."

"Rachel, you know I can't promise you that," Shelby replied sadly. "Unless your dads and I know without a shred of doubt that you can go to school and be safe and protected, then I can't promise that. But I can promise that I will talk to Principal Figgins again and Mr. Schue and whoever else I need to and find a way to work this out. I am going to try my best to make sure you get to stay, okay?"

It's not what she wanted to hear, but Rachel nodded her agreement. "Okay. Sorry."

"Okay," Shelby echoed. "And I'm sorry too for losing my cool earlier and for yelling at you. I—baby, I just hate the idea of you being hurt like this. It's not okay, Rach. And it infuriates me in a way that I didn't even believe was possible. You don't deserve to put up with that. And I just wish I would have known. I wish you wouldn't have felt like you had to deal with this yourself."

The girl's chin only quivered and tears fell faster in response, and Shelby sighed for what must have been the millionth time that afternoon. She flipped the center console open and pulled out a couple of tissues.

"Hey, it'll be okay, my love, I can promise you that too," Shelby assured, cleaning away the tears spilling down her daughter's cheeks. "Please stop crying, baby. You know I hate seeing you like this. I'm sorry that this is happening. But I swear we're going to fix it. It'll all be okay."

Rachel accepted the Kleenex from her mother's hand and tried to control her labored breathing, taking in sharp, shallow breaths. After the tears began to subside, she sniffled, blew her nose, and used another tissue to wipe the remnants of her breakdown off her face.

"You okay?" Shelby prodded, looking over her daughter with concern.

"I don't know," Rachel admitted. Truthfully, after weeks of burying her feelings about all of this, now that it was all out in the open, her emotions were bashing her against the rocks. "Can we just go, please?"

"Okay," Shelby agreed. Without another thought, she leaned over and drew her daughter in for a hug and pulled away to kiss her forehead. "I love you kid, everything will be alright."

Nodding, Rachel forced herself to give her a small smile and Shelby squeezed her arm reassuringly before turning away to start the car. With another heavy sigh, the mother turned the key in the ignition, flicked on the windshield wipers, and pulled away from the curb to make their way down the water-covered street.

* * *

 **A/N: Sorry. I know it's been a minute, but hope this was worth the wait! Part II of this including more of S and R's reactions to this situation shall be up soonish.**

 **Also wanted to give you guys some insight into where I'm going with EC and for now, I want to see this at least through Regionals (which for the purposes of this story is the end of freshman year for R) and currently we're at the end of January on that timeline, but don't worry! because there's still a million and one things I want to include before we get there.**

 **Thanks so much for all the follows, favorites, and feedback. I appreciate it more than I can express!**


	21. Chapter 21

"I still don't understand what the point of having a garage is if you're still going to park the car on the driveway," Rachel said, flicking the rain off her body in discontent as she wiped her boots on the mat.

Shelby grabbed Rachel's damp jacket and hung it in the coat closet before shedding her own. "Yet I never hear you complaining about it whenever you're in there using the dance studio. And it's just water, Rach. It's not going to kill you."

"Whatever, I just hate it when it rains," the teenager grumbled.

Sighing, the mother opened the drenched umbrella and set it on the door mat to dry before facing her daughter. "Please take a quick shower and then come back downstairs when you're finished," she instructed. "I'd like to finish our discussion earlier."

"Mom I'm tired, can we _please_ just talk about this tomorrow?" Rachel whined in a high tenor, as if just to illustrate how exhausted she was.

"Well, if you would've just talked to me during dinner, like I asked you to, multiple times, then you could be going to bed now," Shelby countered back. She was also spent. More than that. But the one thing that she's learned about her daughter in the past few months was to never send the girl to bed upset, because she would not be able to fall asleep. Shelby's learned this the hard way one too many times dealing with a cantankerous-Rachel the morning after. It was a better strategy to resolve things as much as possible before they both resigned for the night.

"I already did talk. To Dr. Montgomery. Like you ask me to all the time," Rachel argued. "Isn't that the point, mother? Therapy, so you don't have to deal with me yourself?"

"Hey," Shelby grasped Rachel's arm before the girl could even think about walking away. "Absolutely not, Rach. I understand you are upset and that it's been a long day, but you do not get to speak to me that way. I really don't want to fight, kid, so please drop the attitude."

"Okay," the younger brunette relented with a dejected sigh. "Fine. I'm sorry."

"Thank you," Shelby smiled wearily before liberating her arm. "I promise it won't take long, baby. I just want to make sure we're on the same page."

"Mhmm," Rachel huffed indignantly as she stomped up the stairs. "Whatever you say."

Channeling patience, Shelby set her lips in a fine line and pressed them together to fight back a smart reply. She was the adult. She was in charge. She had to rise above.

A moment later, the resounding sound of the door slamming echoed throughout the house and Shelby bit down down on her tongue, hard.

Adult, in charge, rise, she repeated over and over again in her head as she also made her way upstairs.

* * *

More than an hour later, after her own shower and a lengthy phone call with Hiram and Leroy to fill the fathers in on the situation, Shelby stepped out into the hallway to find Rachel's bedroom door closed and light turned off. Frowning, she knocked on the door and waited for an answer. After a few seconds of subsequent silence, she walked back downstairs to search for the teenager, hoping that she had just gone down to obey her directions.

She headed for the office first, knowing that it was the girl's favorite space in the house, and then moved to the kitchen after not finding her there. And living room next. The basement. Even the garage. When she completed a sweep of the ground floor to no avail, frustration crackled inside of her and irritation quickened her blood. She ran up the stairs, two at a time, while brainstorming all the ways she was going to murder her daughter if she was not in her bedroom.

Forgoing the courtesy, Shelby ripped the door open to the sight of an unmoving lump lying on the bed and instantly felt some of the edge dissipate. She sighed knowing full well that there was no way her kid was asleep. She flipped the light on without warning, which caused Rachel to immediately duck under the covers in an attempt to hide from her.

"Rach, I knocked on the door earlier, why didn't you answer?" Shelby asked as she crossed the room. "I know you're not sleeping kid, and I told you earlier that I wanted to talk."

Rachel felt the mattress dip as her mother sat down next to her and she couldn't help but scoot further under her blanket, desperately wishing that she was anywhere else in the world right now. She wasn't purposefully trying to be defiant. She didn't even have it in her to argue. It was just that the absolute last thing she was interested in at the moment was discussing how much of a loser she was at school with her mother. With Shelby Corcoran, of all people.

"Rachel," Shelby said gently but firmly, reaching her hand out to rest on her child under the covers. "Please sit up so we can talk."

Rachel only burrowed down in response and shifted away from her mother's touch. She drew the duvet down as close and as tight to her body as possible as if that single act would protect her from the torrent of emotions currently raining down on her. She just wanted to be alone. Why didn't her mother understand that?

"I don't want to mom, please go away," she begged, her voice muffled.

"Baby," Shelby softened her tone, hoping it would draw her daughter from her hiding place. She was expecting a fight from her smart-alecky and sometimes too brazen teenager, not this. Flooded immediately with concern, she reached out again and rubbed her daughter's back with a gentle hand. "What's going on, my love? Are you afraid of being in trouble? Because I'm not going to punish you, Rach. I just talked to your dads and I promise we're not mad. Although we do wish that you would've just come to us instead of trying to figure it out on your own, we're not interested in giving you a consequence for trying to stick up for yourself. Your grounding will still be over tomorrow kid, I promise. Just please talk to me Rach, I just want to make sure you're okay."

Under the blanket, Rachel bit down on her lip and fought every urge she had to cry. Even the assurance of leniency wasn't enough for her to emerge from her protective cocoon. There was far too much on her mind right now and she wasn't keen on sharing any of it with her mother.

"I'm fine, mom," she replied, betrayed that her voice sounded congested like it always did when she was crying. "I'm just really tired, can we please talk about this tomorrow?"

Picking up the sure sounds of sniffling, Shelby exhaled a worried sigh as she stood up. "Okay, Rach," she agreed while she walked over to the door, then flicked the light off. "I'm hearing you and we can talk about it tomorrow. But I am not leaving you alone."

In one fluid motion, Shelby kicked off her slippers and climbed into the bed then carefully peeled the covers away. Before Rachel could react, Shelby pulled her into a warm embrace. "Come here baby, I've got you."

Rachel flipped over and tried to push past the massive lump in her throat to explain herself, but she didn't get so much as a strangled sob out before Shelby drew her in even closer, her arms encompassing her daughter completely. That was all it took for Rachel to lose any pretense of control and she finally unleashed every taunt, every slushie, every single hurtful word or action hurled her way that she's been harboring deep inside for weeks.

"You're okay, my love," Shelby assured, stroking her daughter's back in a soothing manner. "Everything will be alright, I promise. Just let it out, Rach. I've got you. I'm here."

* * *

The following morning, Rachel woke up alone and only vaguely aware of her surroundings. She peeked at the alarm and noticed it was almost nine o'clock. While the lateness of the hour would have normally been enough to jolt her out of bed, she wasn't exactly chomping at the bit to begin her day.

She shut her eyes in resignation as last night's events automatically flashed through her mind. With a groan, she pulled the covers over her head again. Maybe if she just stayed in bed she could avoid her mother. Avoid their impending talk. Avoid dealing with everything being out in the open. Avoid it all.

Rachel stayed under the protective shield of her blanket for an undetermined amount of time. It was only when she heard the pinging sound of an incoming notification did she free herself from the tangled covers. Another chime caused her to sit up and she scanned her eyes across the room before landing on her cell phone laid on top of a neatly folded pile of clothes on the desk.

Getting up immediately, she walked over and inspected the phone first, suddenly remembering that this was her first day of freedom in almost a month. She began to look through the deluge of weeks' worth of notifications before her eyes drifted back to the pile of clothes, her stomach flip flopping instantly realizing they were the now-clean but previously-ruined pieces of clothing she had stuffed in her backpack from the past week. Her smile faltering, she also picked up a note placed next to the objects.

" _Had to run an errand. I'll be back around 9:30 to pick you up. Please be ready to come with me to VA rehearsal. Breakfast downstairs."_

Brows furrowing, she unlocked her phone and dialed her mom's number. It only took two rings for the woman to answer.

"Mom, why do I have to go to rehearsal with you? I just woke up, can't I just stay here? I am ungrounded, right?"

"Good morning to you too Rach, I'm glad you're up," Shelby greeted on the other line. "Have you eaten?"

" _Mom,_ " Rachel whined in staunch protest. This was the first free time she had to do whatever she pleased, completely unrestricted since the new year started. And it was rather unfair that she had to spend it going to work with her mother. "Please let me stay home. Your rehearsals last _forever._ "

"Rachel, no. I'm not asking. I am on my way back home to pick you up and you are coming to rehearsal with me," Shelby said."I am only doing lyric checks this morning, it won't last longer than an hour and a half at most. I promise."

"But _why?_ You always used to let me stay home alone. And why are you even going in to work? Isn't that why you hired Dustin, so you don't have to work Saturday rehearsals anymore?"

"Rachel, I am not interested in negotiating," Shelby chided, her tone firm and unwavering. "Unless you want to be grounded for all of February too, please get ready to come to Carmel with me. We're having lunch with your father after my rehearsal and then we have few other errands to run this afternoon."

Shelby heard the teenager groan audibly in response. Exhausted and frustrated, the mother sucked in a sharp inhale. While normally she was perfectly fine with leaving her daughter at home to fend for herself, she was a little more than hesitant to leave the girl alone with everything going on. It took her almost until midnight to settle her child down. Even then, she got barely any rest watching Rachel struggle through a fitful sleep. And while she was becoming well versed with her kid's aptitude for dramatics, Shelby knew that there was something inherently wrong with her daughter. But since Rachel refused to speak to her about it, she could only guess that the bullying situation affected the girl more than she let on. In the meanwhile, the only option she felt comfortable with at the moment was to keep her daughter close.

" _But—"_

"No buts, Rachel Barbra. Be ready in fifteen minutes or else," Shelby warned, gritting her teeth as the line went dead on the other end. "Adult, in charge, rise," the mother muttered her newly-adopted mantra to herself.

* * *

Yet another argument and a grueling silence-filled car ride later, Shelby walked through the halls of Carmel with a purposeful stride and her obstinate child trailing behind her. She was already running behind schedule and one of her biggest pet peeves was rushing. She was a stickler for preparation and punctuality. Tenets that were challenged every day now that she had a teenager.

She made her way to the auditorium in haste and paused right outside the door before turning to regard her daughter sternly.

"I understand you are not pleased with being here right now, so I will compromise. Here are my keys," Shelby offered, holding them up over Rachel's outstretched hand. "You may… hang out in my office, go on my computer, or use any of the practice rooms. The login password is your birthday and all the sheet music are in my file cabinet. But you are to stay in that wing and go nowhere else, Rachel. Am I clear? I will check in on you in exactly 45 minutes."

After eliciting a nod in confirmation, Shelby dropped the keys into the teenager's grasp then placed a quick kiss on top of her head. "Good. Go on, my love. I'll see you soon."

Content with the arrangement, Rachel obeyed orders and strolled through the familiar route to the vocal coach's office. At least if her mother was working, then the woman wouldn't be able to pry or coerce her into talking. In fact, she would truly rather be grounded for another month than begin to discuss the fact that she was being picked on day in and day out.

Immersed with her thoughts, she rounded the corner towards her destination and total fear pulsed through her body when an unknown hand from behind covered her mouth and pulled her into the darkness. Pure adrenaline and an innate sense of survival roared inside of her and without another thought, she used the only weapon she had available.

"Ow! Holy shit, Rachel!" Jesse exclaimed as he released his grasp. Grimacing from the pain, he clenched his throbbing finger as the seething girl turned around to face him. "Did you just _bite_ me? Why would you do that?"

Coming down from one of the most frightening moments of her life, fury seared right through her and Rachel pushed the boy away with a forceful shove. "Why would _you_ grab me like that! What the hell, Jesse! I thought I was dying. You could've been anyone!"

"I'm sorry," Jesse said, switching the light on in the spacious practice room then shut the door behind him. "I've literally been trying to call after you but you weren't paying attention. Bad joke, sorry."

" _Terrible_ joke, you stalker," Rachel said, still clutching her pounding chest. "You couldn't think of any other way to grab my attention?"

"Yes sorry, that was a bit much," he admitted. He sat down on the piano bench and inspected his still-pulsating hand.

"Sorry for biting you. Does it hurt?" Rachel asked guiltily.

"I think I'll survive," Jesse smirked, wiggling them up in the air. "But sheesh Berry, remind me to never provoke you ever again."

"Shut up," Rachel laughed. "What do you want anyway? Isn't rehearsal starting?"

Blue eyes glanced down at a watch. "In about seven minutes, but I wanted to talk to you because I _need_ you to tell your mother that you _begged_ me not to tell her about the slushie-ing. Because I am convinced that she's going to kill me. Or _worse_ , kick me off VA."

Her face falling, Rachel shook her head in sincere confusion. "What are you talking about?"

"Shelby found out about the bullying happening at school, right? She was over my house this morning. I woke up and she was in the living room talking to my dad about it. I overheard something about a dude named Figgins being fired and something else about funding. And then I ran into her on her way out and I panicked, okay, do not judge me, but I told her I was glad that she knew and—"

"Wait, I don't understand," Rachel interjected, growing even more perplexed. "Why was she talking to your dad about it?"

"Oh, well, he's the Superintendent of Lima Public Schools. You didn't know?"

"What? No, how would I know that? Why? What else did my mom say? Why would you tell her that you knew?" Rachel pounced. This is exactly why she didn't tell her parents, because she knew that they would just escalate it. And in her opinion, there was no reason to. She was handling it.

"I don't know!" Jesse said in matching fervor and threw his hands up dramatically. "Why would you tell me _not_ to tell her? She's your mom, Rach. Besides, aren't you glad that she does know now, so you can finally stop dealing with that crap?"

"I—" Rachel paused and swallowed the anxiety rising in her throat. "Yeah, I guess, but you still shouldn't have said anything!"

"What does it matter! She already knew!" Jesse lobbed. "She asked me when I found out and how long I've known and when I told her, all she said was 'oh, interesting' and then just gave me that look, you know? _That_ look."

Jesse attempted to twist his face into his best impression of the legendary Coach Corcoran glare and Rachel only burst out into a hearty laughter in response.

"You look like you're about to pass gas," she pointed out. "Please, _never_ do that again."

"Whatever," Jesse flushed beet red. "Anyway, I don't know what 'oh, interesting' means so you have to tell her that you asked me not to say anything to her. I know she's your mom and all, but she's also my teacher and my coach and she essentially controls my life. And if I _really_ had to choose my allegiance between you and Shelby Corcoran, it's going to be her. Sorry. She has a Tony."

"You're the worst!" Rachel admonished. "I thought we were friends!"

"We are," Jesse flashed her a crooked smile. "And as if you wouldn't do the same."

"Fair," Rachel conceded, not realizing that she had begun to pace the length of the rehearsal space. "Fine, I'll tell her. I'm sorry Jesse, I didn't mean to bring you in the middle of it. It's just—ugh I don't know, I _hate_ this."

"Yeah, I'm sure. It's really messed up," Jesse said sympathetically. "I still can't even believe how long you've been taking it. If it were me, I'd have blown up weeks ago. But don't you at least feel better now that it's all out there? At least it's not just _your_ problem anymore. I told you before, you don't deserve to put up with that. What even happened? How did Shelby find out? Cause I take it that you didn't spill."

"I know, thanks," Rachel nodded distractedly. "And nothing happened. I just—tried to fix it myself. Mr. Schue was the one who told my mom."

"Really? Well at least he's got your back," Jesse remarked, crossing his arms over his chest. "Goolsby still sucks. He threw me under the bus the other day and it was completely his fault. Also, did you know we took in a new student? One of Goolsby's recruits. Her name is Sunshine and she's actually kind of amazing but Giselle is livid of course. And, god, don't even get me started on all the flirting with Coach C."

Rachel's head was spinning trying to follow to Jesse's long winded rant, a scowl taking over her face as soon as it all registered. "What? _Flirting?_ "

"Oh yeah," Jesse scoffed in disgust. "Flirting."

"Flirting?" Rachel repeated herself, a deep frown pulling down her lips.

"Yes. _Flirting_ ," Jesse rose to his feet slowly and locked eyes with Rachel intensely. With a tiny grin, he took a step forward and leaned into her slightly, shrinking the space between them. "You know… _flirting_ ," he whispered as he reached over and grazed her arm with a light touch. "Sorta like this."

The embarrassed heat that touched her cheeks surprised Rachel. Why was she reacting like this? Her heart thudding out of rhythm, she dropped her gaze and stepped back to create some much-needed distance. "Alright back off, St. James. I'm aware of what flirting is. I just don't believe that it's happening."

"I'm not making it up," Jesse said with a despondent shrug. "I'm telling you. Goolsby flirts with your mom all the time. It's so uncomfortable. I still don't trust him."

"There's no way. My mom _doesn't_ do that," Rachel said adamantly. "She gets hit on _all_ the time and she doesn't bat an eyelash. I'm not kidding. I don't think she's once realized that the barista at the Lima Bean _always_ undercharges her. And then one time, my dentist, who's stupid attractive, by the way, flat-out asked her out on a date and she thought he meant it was for all _three of us_ to hang out. She _doesn't_ flirt."

"Okay fine, yes, maybe _she_ doesn't, but _he_ definitely does and even if she is or isn't aware of it, she's not rejecting it either. He'll flirt with her and then somehow convince her to do all his dumb ideas! It's a mess. God, I'm so glad he's gone this weekend."

Rachel kinked her eyebrows while a contemplative expression crossed her features. "I think you're overreacting," she decided. "He can't be _that_ bad. I'm sure that—"

"Oh crap, I'm late," Jesse interrupted, catching the time. "I should go before I give your mother any more reason to kill me. Sorry, but I'll catch you later?"

"Sure. I've actually just been liberated from my Shelby Sentence, so you may text me again," she said, surprising herself at the offer.

"Will do," Jesse beamed, causing Rachel to truly notice his baby blue eyes and boyish grin for the first time, which, she's figured, has probably allowed him to get away with murder.

"And I'd tell you more about what happened between my dad and Shelby, but my Ma caught me eavesdropping. Just ask Shelby though, she'd tell you, right?"

"Mhmm," Rachel nodded thoughtfully while she opened the practice room door. "Don't worry about it."

Jesse followed her out into the hallway and paused to look at Rachel. For whatever reason, he couldn't stand seeing her so morose. Maybe it was the fact that he was introduced to Rachel Berry in all her glory, dominating the Sectionals stage as if it was the last thing she'd do, that made him feel this way. Because that was always how he saw her in his head, not like this.

"You know you're better than everyone else there, right?" He asked, certainty laced in his voice. "Don't let them get to you. You're Rachel Berry. If anyone's going to be a star, it's going to be you."

"I'm still not joining VA," Rachel replied with a playful nudge. "But thanks, Jesse. You better go."

"Whatever, I'm over it," Jesse shrugged coolly as he walked away. "Stay with the New Directions for all I care. It'll be a lot more satisfying when we beat you!"

* * *

It was twenty minutes after Vocal Adrenaline rehearsal ended and Rachel was still lying on the couch in her mother's office. Despite the previous offers, she couldn't bring herself to do anything but lie down and attempt to organize her thoughts. She wasn't dense. She knew that her parents were going to tag-team a confession out of her by the time the day was over, but she was still unprepared to discuss how she felt.

And she was tired of talking. She just wanted everything to be completely okay for once. She wanted to stop missing her dad. She wanted her parents to stop treating her like she was fragile. She wanted to be left alone at school. She wanted people to accept her for who she was. She wanted to go back in the past or go forward in the future. She wanted to be anywhere but here.

Rachel expected her mother to be at her side the moment practice was over, but she had yet to make an appearance. The woman didn't even come check on her like she had promised to earlier. However, at some point during the past two hours, Rachel did decide that she also _wanted_ and _needed_ things to get better. And she was learning that that meant changing her mindset, opening up, being honest with how she felt, leaning on her family and friends… allowing her mother in.

Trying.

Rachel closed her eyes and a crawling, weary exhalation of breath puffed from her lungs. She allowed herself another moment to settle her emotions and rein in control. Once she felt as centered as she could get, she finally got up and decided to look for her mother.

* * *

Shelby was sitting behind the piano, concentrated on composing a new arrangement for her Advanced Vocal class when Rachel entered the auditorium. Her team dispersed nearly half an hour ago, but she couldn't bring herself to leave, figuring her daughter would seek her out eventually.

She needed to resolve what to do next. How to move forward. How to fix it. How to be a better mom. And admittedly, she just needed a moment, a second, a break to not feel like she was lost and flailing around in the dark when it came to helping her daughter.

"Hey mom, why didn't you come get me?" Rachel asked as she climbed the stage.

Shelby blinked several times while she focused in on her teenager approaching her then formed a weak smile. "Sorry baby, I just got preoccupied for a bit. You ready to go?"

An expression that she couldn't read flitted across her mother's face and Rachel frowned. At this point, she thought she knew every single one of her mom's expressions. The woman rarely held out on her anymore.

She approached the piano bench and sat down in the vacant spot when Shelby scooted over. "I'm sorry," she said, placing her head on her mother's shoulder. Rachel instantly felt that familiar sense of calm begin to seep into her body as Shelby's cheek came to rest against the top of her head and a comforting arm wrapped around her shoulder.

"I'm sorry too," Shelby replied sadly. "I shouldn't have forced you to come to rehearsal with me. I know you just wanted space. And I did promise you I would try to do better with that. I'm just so worried about you, Rach."

"I know, mom… it's okay. I'm just—I'm sorry for all the arguing. I don't mean to. Not on purpose, at least."

"I know," Shelby squeezed gently before lifting her head and releasing her hold. "I'm not upset with you, kid. Even if you did tell Jesse before you told me," she teased.

"Only because he found out accidentally," Rachel chuckled.

Shelby nodded and assessed her daughter with a critical eye, wondering if she'd ever tire of how remarkable it was just how much her baby ended up looking like her. The full mouth, the big eyes, the long dark hair, the sharp, angular features. It was all there.

"Why didn't you tell me, Rach?"

Rachel chewed lightly on her bottom lip while she considered her answer. She had never been one to give her parents single syllables or silence in return for their questions before, and she hated that she seemed to be creating a habit of it now. But she couldn't help it. "I don't know," she lied.

Shelby frowned inwardly, careful not to let the expression bleed into her features. "I think you do know, my love. But I think that you just don't want to tell me."

Shelby watched an internal battle rage behind the near-perfect mask of her daughter's showface.

"Talk to me, Rach," Shelby begged, drawing her hand up to tuck loose brown locks behind the girl's ears. "It's just me."

"I can't, mom," Rachel said, feeling the tight ache in her throat that told her tears were moving dangerously close to the surface. "I can't…" she paused and swallowed against the feeling, willing herself to stay focused. "I couldn't tell _you._ "

"Why couldn't you tell me? Did someone ask you not to?"

"No, mom," Rachel shook her head in frustration. She stood up suddenly and didn't miss how her mother flinched at the abrupt movement. She sighed heavily and brushed her fingers across her forehead, searching for the right words. "I couldn't tell… _you_ ," she said again, speaking slowly and distinctly.

"Rachel, baby, I'm—I don't understand what you mean," Shelby said, confusion flooding her thoughts as she swirled her body around to face her daughter now pacing anxiously in front of her. "I'm not following. Why couldn't you tell _me?_ I'm your mom."

"I know and that—that's why!" Rachel exclaimed, quickly losing any self-control she just spent the previous few hours gathering. "I couldn't tell _you_. Because out of the two of us, I'm the one who got lucky, right? I'm the one who got the Broadway superstar as a mom. I'm the one who got Shelby Corcoran. And you're the one who got… _me_."

"Rachel—" Shelby breathed out as the weight of the admission settled painstakingly on her heart.

"You're everything," Rachel cut her off, pushing through everything that was screaming at her to stop before the words evaded her again. "You are _literally_ everything that I've ever wanted and everything I've ever dreamed of having. And I get to have _you_ as my mom. And I couldn't tell you because I didn't want _you_ to know how much of a loser I am at school. How pathetic I am and how I hardly have any friends. I didn't want you to realize that I'm not—I'm not as pretty or as cool or as popular as someone like Quinn. I'm not—you, and dad, and daddy all act like something's wrong with me sometimes. And I, I know I'm all over the place all the time. I know I'm not handling everything well. I know I'm a lot to handle. And you must wish that you had a daughter that was… easier… that was… that wasn't… _me."_

Rachel was crying in earnest now and didn't bother to hide the tears. Everything felt amplified and she just wanted to get everything out. She wanted it all out there and needed to stop feeling this way. Before she could step away, her mom also stood up and grabbed both of her hands and shot her a look filled with so much love and concern, it automatically drew her into her arms. Relinquishing control, Rachel fell forward and into the security of her embrace and exhaled—a sigh that seemed to leech all tension from her body. " _Mommy_."

"I'm here baby, you're okay," Shelby said as her daughter buried her face into her shoulder, the tears dampening her shirt quickly. "You're alright, my love. Just breathe. In and out. Breathe for me."

Shelby squeezed tightly as she felt a jagged sob jerk through her child. Her own heart shattering, there was nothing she could do but hold her. She cupped the back of her head in on one warm palm, and let her daughter curl into her as close as possible. As the seconds slid away, Shelby could feel Rachel's tears begin to slow and her breath even out. But it took a few minutes more before she pulled back slightly to look her kid in the face, now willing herself not to cry as she recalled everything Rachel just admitted.

"I love you," Shelby said, lifting up a hand to wipe away the stray tears that still escaped from the corners of Rachel's eyes. "I love you _so much_ , baby. More than—more than anything, more than I even knew was possible, and you mean the whole wide world to me, Rach. _You're_ everything _._ You light me up, and I can't imagine a life without you in it now. I don't want to. _I'm_ the lucky one, Rachel. _I'm_ the one who got _you."_

"Mom—"

"Oh no, baby," Shelby shook her head, perching herself back on the bench and guiding the girl to sit down next to her. "You got to talk, so it's my turn now. And I really need you to hear what I have to say."

Shelby paused and hooked her finger under her daughter's chin then tilted her head up to lock eye contact.

"Listen to me, my love. _You_ are beautiful and smart and talented and kind. You are _not_ pathetic and you are _not_ a loser. And there is nothing wrong with you. What's happening at school, how the other kids treat you, that is not your fault, Rachel. You did nothing to deserve that."

"I just want to stop feeling this way though, mom. I just..."

"Want to fit in? Want to be accepted?" Shelby finished her sentence, understanding where her daughter was coming from. "I get that and you will. I know it seems insurmountable right now, but I promise you, kid, that things will get better. And you will find your place. And you will feel comfortable to be yourself. And it seems to me that you have more friends than you think, Rach. I know Kurt and Quinn have your back. Noah and Santana too?"

Rachel only offered a small and rather slow shrug, as if the weight of the world was resting on her shoulders, and Shelby reached out to caress her daughter's tear-stained cheek, smoothing her thumb across the surface of her skin. _This_ , to her, was the most difficult part of being a mom. Seeing her child this way and feeling helpless. She hated it. Above all else, she _hated_ it.

"There is _nothing_ wrong with you," she repeated with all the conviction in the universe. "And I'm so sorry if your dads and I have made you feel that way. That was never our intention. We just worry about you, but we do not think that, my love. We talk all the time about how strong we think you are and how proud we are of you. I know that none of this is easy and I know it seems like you can't catch a break, but I see that you're trying baby and I see how you push through. I see how you keep your head up. And that to me doesn't mean that you're all over the place or that you're not handling it well. Not in the slightest."

"You… you don't think I'm a lot to handle?" Rachel asked in tone that made Shelby acutely feel rather than hear the hurt and confusion still laced in her daughter's voice.

It was then Shelby realized that while she and Rachel have grown so much in their relationship in the past few months, they still had miles to go, a mountain to climb, distance to cross on their road to finding their way as mother and daughter, to finding their way as a family. And that while she's been able to gradually build up her daughter's love and trust in her, that she had to continue to work at it every single day. And work twice as hard in order to make up for the almost fourteen years she's missed. And that while she's learned a lot and gained more confidence as a mom, she still had to fight, and choose, and try, and fail, and try again to be the best mom that her daughter deserved.

"No," Shelby's heart wrenched so badly at having to answer that question. "I don't think you're a lot, Rach. I—I'm not even sure what that means, kid. And I have never, not even for a millisecond, wished that I had a daughter that wasn't you, my sweet and lovely girl. Never _._ "

"Never?" Rachel asked carefully.

" _Never_ ," Shelby promised, snaking her arm around the girl's shoulder to hold her close, not knowing whether or not the comfort was more for her or her daughter. "I honestly would think you're pretty incredible even if you weren't my kid."

"You're just saying that."

"When have I ever lied to you, Rach? I really mean it. You know what the best part of all of this has been for me? It's yes, being together, getting to know you, and learning everything about you. Becoming your mom has been amazing. But you know what my favorite and the most unexpected part of it all has been for me too? Becoming friends with you on top of it, Rach. It's an added bonus that I didn't see coming. I don't know about you, kid, but you're _easily_ one of my best friends now."

"What?" Rachel said as the corners of her mouth quirked upwards, lifting Shelby's spirit along with it. "Really?"

"Yes, really," Shelby chuckled lightly at the teenager's thoroughly amused expression. "I mean, who else is going to sing and dance along to Motown with me during rush hour in the mornings? Or spend Friday nights watching our power ranking of the funniest 'Friends' episodes? And you're a much better yoga partner than your Aunt Kim ever was. I'd never know about any of the latest Broadway news or who you've deemed as my newest competition, if it weren't for your email updates. I wouldn't have tried that grossly hipster, though admittedly delicious, vegan restaurant downtown. I—you're the person I want to hang out with or talk to at the end of the day, Rach. Whenever something good happens, I want to share it with you. And I think that makes you one of my best friends. Don't you?"

Rachel shifted at the words and wrapped her arms around her mother, settling in at what was becoming one of her safe places. "You're mine too, mom."

"No more tears, Rach. Everything will be alright," Shelby soothed as a hand rubbed her back gently. She placed a lingering kiss on top of brown hair before loosening her hold.

"You promise?"

"I'm sure going to try," Shelby smiled reassuringly. She brushed Rachel's hairs off the side of her face to look at her properly. The bone-deep sorrow and weariness marked all of her daughter's face made a decision for her. "Rachel, before we meet with your dad to talk about everything that's been going on, can I ask you something?"

Rachel hummed softly at the question. "Sure."

"How do _you_ want to handle this situation? What do _you_ want to do? Because I've realized, kid, that this should be about you. I don't want you to lose any more control. I'm sorry that I wasn't listening to you before. I've just been so upset about this baby that I went a little crazy when I started taking over and tried fixing things for you, but I want you to know that I trust you. And I trust your decisions for yourself and I will help you and support whatever _you_ want to do."

The instant relief crossing the teenager's face told Shelby that she had made the right call. "You will?"

"I will," Shelby tapped her knee in reassurance. "And I will talk to your dads too. We've got your back, Rach."

"Okay," Rachel grinned, this one easily forming on her lips. "I want it to stop mom, I really do. And not just for me, but for others like Kurt who get hurt all the time. But I also would really like to stay at McKinley. I don't want to run away from my problems, mom. I just don't think that…"

As Shelby listened to her daughter spout out her thoughts and suggestions over the situation, Shelby felt calm enter her body for the first time in what seemed like days. The way that words flowed freely from Rachel's lips compared to where they were a few hours ago finally told Shelby that she was at least on the right track.

* * *

 **A/N: Thank you for joining me for another one, would love to hear any of your thoughts! Next chapter will include Valentine's Day festivities with the EC ladies.**


	22. Chapter 22

Stepping out of their bedrooms, both Shelby and Rachel walked out into the hallway at the same time and automatically examined one another suspiciously.

"Why do you look like that?" Rachel asked, narrowing her eyes at her mother who was wearing a white silky blouse, black skinny jeans, and heeled ankle boots.

"Look like what Rach?" Shelby replied innocently, already heading down to the front door before the teenager could respond.

"I don't know you look nice…r than usual. And you smell good too."

"Are you implying that I usually don't look nice and that I normally smell bad?"

"No. I am doing no such thing," Rachel answered quickly, trailing behind the older woman walking down the stairs. "I am merely pointing out that you have makeup on tonight, mother."

"I always have makeup on Rach," Shelby replied while she pulled two jackets from the coat closet then proceeded to help Rachel put hers on before donning her own. "Please don't forget your hat and scarf and gloves."

"Mom I'm fine, it's not that cold out," Rachel ducked her head away from her mother's attempt to pull a wool cap over her head. "I just fixed my hair. I don't want it to get ruined."

"And why do _you_ care if your hair is a little messed up?" Shelby countered back. "Who are _you_ trying to look nice for?"

"Hey! I asked you first," Rachel griped while twisting a scarf the woman just threw around her neck.

"Well I'm your mother and I am asking you second," Shelby replied.

"Mom, I'm just going to come right out and say it," Rachel said as she turned to face the woman, her face solemn and her tone serious. "I am not going to let you date anyone named Dustin Goolsby. His last name alone disqualifies him from any further consideration."

Shelby chewed on her lip and stifled back an amused reaction from filtering on her face. "Rach, I already told you, I am _not_ going on a date with Dustin. We're just getting coffee to talk about work."

"Mhmm sure," Rachel said, her tone full of skepticism. "Getting coffee to talk about work… outside of work… during Valentine's Day is definitely not a date. Dad always says if it looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then it probably is a duck. It's a date, mother."

Shelby couldn't help the laugh that escaped at that remark. "Okay so I see that you've been talking to your dad about his cases again. It's not a date, Rachel," she spoke slowly and evenly to get the record straight. "Dustin and I are only coworkers. I'm technically his boss. We are not dating. Tonight just happened to be the only free time I had available all week to do this."

Rachel lowered her eyebrows and squinted her eyes critically at her mother, deciding if she was going to accept the explanation at face value.

"Baby, if it was a date, I'd tell you," Shelby offered, picking up on the internal debate going through her kid's head. "We'd talk about it. But because it's not and there's nothing going on between Dustin and I, there's nothing to talk about."

Begrudgingly, Rachel blew out her cheeks and nodded her head in acceptance. "Okay. But maybe you just don't think it's a date. What if he does?"

"Then I'll tell him we're not on a date," Shelby replied, grabbing her purse and guiding her teenager out the door. "And using your logic, are _you_ going on a date with Jesse?"

"What? No," Rachel rejected the thought. "We're just hanging out. He wants to tell me more about the NYADA social he invited me to this weekend."

"Okay and the two of you _have_ to do this tonight… on Valentine's Day?"

" _Mooom!"_

"Hey," Shelby chuckled in sweet revenge while she locked up the house then turned to regard her daughter with a satisfied grin. "This is your reasoning that I'm employing, kid. Looks like a duck, or shall I say, a date, to me. Is there anything going on between you and Jesse that I should know about? You know how your fathers feel about you dating, Rach. We have to have a conversation about this if you're thinking about it."

Rachel rolled her eyes and paired it with a long-suffering sigh that did nothing but amuse the mother endlessly. "No," the girl paused for a moment then lifted her chin, puffed out her chest, and squared her shoulders. "Because if it was a date mother, I'd tell you. We'd talk about it. But because it's not and there's nothing going on between Jesse and I, there's nothing to talk about."

Shelby's mouth fell open in shock. "Excuse me? You did not just—"

"Can't kill me, if you can't catch me!" Rachel shrieked before jogging away in a flash towards the car.

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Shelby skillfully maneuvered the Range Rover into a tight spot in downtown Lima. Once she was satisfied with her parallel park job, she cut the engine and turned her focus back to her daughter.

"Rach, are you sure you're okay to be out tonight? We can go back home and stay in. I don't mind. You've had kind of an intense day already."

Rachel hesitated to answer while her thoughts traveled back to the meeting with her and Dave Karofsky and their parents at school earlier this afternoon. While she did receive assurances of an end to the random slushie attacks and somewhat of a sincere apology, she was just mostly looking forward to finally being able to move on.

"I'm fine," Rachel told her mom truthfully. "I'm just glad it's all over. I still can't believe you got them to fire Principal Figgins and put Coach Sylvester in charge. I think Mr. Schue's head almost exploded when he found out."

"Well it wasn't my decision, but I don't really care as long as she's enforcing the zero-tolerance policy on bullying that she touted," Shelby replied with a shrug. "But I'm glad it's all over too, kid. You'll let me know if anything else happens or if there are any other issues at school?"

Rachel hummed in approval and gave her mother a genuine smile. "Yes, I promise I will from now on. Thanks for having my back, mom."

"Good," Shelby said in relief. "You don't have to thank me. I'm your mom. I'll always have your back, my love," she promised with a quick kiss on top of her daughter's head. "I'll just be over at the Lima Bean. Text me whenever you're ready to go and we can head home together?"

"Sounds good," Rachel agreed. "See ya later mama. Have fun on your non-date!"

Shelby only shook her head when Rachel hustled out of her car and headed towards the bookstore across the street. She was in the middle of gathering her belongings when a knock on the passenger window captured her attention. She lifted her head to find Jesse waving hello.

With a sigh, she slipped out of the car and rounded the vehicle to meet Jesse on the sidewalk. Before he could greet her, she lifted her hand and regarded him sternly.

"Listen to me, St. James. I own you. I own your life. I own your future. I own the possibility of you spending your summer at the performing arts camp because that letter of recommendation is due this week, is it not? And what I write is completely up to you. I can go with 'one of the most extraordinary young talents I've ever had the pleasure of teaching' or 'douchebag who led my daughter on for his own amusement.' You decide."

Jesse's jaw slackened and eyes went wide with sincere fear. Shelby has never spoken to him like this before. Sure, she was always tough on him and she pushed him more than anyone else in his life ever has, but she's never threatened him. He opened and closed his mouth dumbly before shaking his head in a vigorous manner. "Coach C, I assure you, Rachel and I are just friends. We're just hanging out. That's all. I don't have a secret agenda. I told you, I'm just focusing on my future and VA right now."

Shelby crooked her eyebrow precariously and narrowed her gaze suspiciously, searching for any hint of dishonesty in her student's voice and eyes. After almost three years, she thought she knew every single one her star singer's expressions. Sometimes, she even felt like she knew Jesse better than he knew himself. But while there was sincerity in his tone, there was something else in his eyes that she couldn't quite pinpoint yet.

"Okay," she said dubiously. "I am choosing to give you the benefit of the doubt right now. However, realize that I am not oblivious to the gossip that swirls around VA. I know I don't need to remind you that I'm Coach Corcoran. I know everything. And I've also heard a rumor or two about your dating habits, St. James. And frankly, I don't really care. What you do outside of my classes and my practices is your business. But I'd be remiss if I didn't remind you that I do care a great deal if my daughter gets hurt. Am I making myself clear, Jesse?"

Jesse wanted to scowl but he couldn't quite let himself get that far in front of his coach. He opted instead to offer her a fearful nod.

"Fantastic," Shelby said in satisfaction. She pulled her jacket closer to her body then began to walk away, pausing to pat Jesse's shoulder in a placating manner. "I'm not mad at you Jesse, just please keep in mind what I just said. Have fun with Rach. I will see you tomorrow."

* * *

"Rach," Jesse breathed out as he settled next to her on the couch in the bookstore. "Your mother..." he paused, looked around, then inched his face closer to hers "...is crazy," he whispered.

Rolling her eyes, Rachel elbowed the side of Jesse's ribs out of irritation.

"Ouch!" Jesse exclaimed a bit too loudly, drawing a disapproving glare from the girl. "That hurt," he pitched his voice lower as customers around them glanced in their direction. "No I'm serious. I ran into her before I walked in here and she basically threatened me."

"About what?" Rachel fished for more elaboration.

"About dating you!"

"What?" Rachel closed the book in her hand and sat up immediately to face him. "Oh god, what did she say?"

"Essentially that she's going to ruin my life for leading you on," Jesse replied, bowing his head in dismay. "My career is over before it's even had a chance to begin."

"Okay," Rachel pried his hands away that covered his face. "Get a grip, Jesse. They're empty threats. She wouldn't actually do anything to you. Not that she'd admit it, but I'm fairly certain that you're her favorite student."

"What if she takes away my solo in our Regionals set, or _worse_ demotes to be second under Giselle."

"Jesse, shut up. We're not dating, so you don't have anything to worry about," Rachel pointed out. "My mom's just being unnecessarily overprotective once again, but I'll talk to her about it. Besides, we are just friends anyway, right?"

Jesse finally lifted his head, caught off guard and surprised at how his heart rate quickened at the inquiry. "Um, yes, we are just friends," he said after a few seconds, his reply sounding more like a question and feeling like a lie more than anything.

"Okay then," Rachel studied him curiously over the weird hesitation. "No big deal. I'll talk to her."

"Thanks," Jesse said, running his now clammy palms over his jeans, immensely confused by where the sudden nerves came from. "I mean I get it, she's only looking out for you."

"She always is," Rachel responded with slight annoyance. "And I love her, but sometimes it's too much."

"What are you going to tell her about us?"

Rachel let out a long exhale while she leaned her head against the cushion then closed her eyes in contemplation. After an undetermined amount of time passed, she finally opened them, her eyes brimming with an excited gleam. "I don't know yet but if you're in, I think I might have a plan."

* * *

"Well," Kim sighed while she plopped down dejectedly into the empty seat to join Shelby and Frannie at the Lima Bean. "An eight-year-old with an inflamed appendix just ruined my Valentine's Day."

"You're terrible," Shelby chided as a matter-of-factly.

"Whatever," Kim shrugged, placing a takeout carton in the middle of the table. "At least we got through appetizers _and_ I made Brian leave his credit card so I could get us dessert. You're welcome."

"He's on call tonight?" Frannie questioned, swiping the container to inspect the treats. "Amazing. Breadstix cannolis are to die for."

"Yes," Kim pouted as she grabbed her pastry and offered the other to her sister. "Unfortunately."

"Oh boo-hoo," Frannie said sarcastically with her mouth full. "Life is _so_ hard when you're married to a doctor."

"I'm with Fran," Shelby smirked. "You don't get my sympathy either. Brian is saving the lives of _children_. You can survive without your carbs for an evening."

"I beg to differ," Kim scoffed, wiping away the powdered sugar that had somehow landed all over her face. "And whatever, yes, Brian gets to come in on his white horse with all his knowledge and decision-making powers, but I am a _nurse_. We're the ones in the trenches. We're the ones who have to coordinate everything, watch patients around the clock, recognize changes in health status, and deal with any and every ongoing issue that arises. _I_ save lives too."

"Touche," Shelby nodded while she took a bite of her own cannoli in a much more graceful manner. "I'm proud of you too, little sis."

"As you should be, Miss Tony Award winner. I rock too," Kim said in vindication then reclined back in her seat and crossed her arms. "Anyway, what's going on with you two? Shelly, how did your non-date with the hot assistant coach go? And where's William tonight, Francine?"

Shelby and Frannie glanced at each other at the line of questioning and exchanged a silent conversation with their eyes. "Alright. I guess I'll go first," Shelby relented as she took a napkin and dabbed off the corners of her mouth daintily. "My non-date was just that. Not a date. Next."

"Oh come on, Shelly," Kim objected passionately. "You have to elaborate. Please enlighten us, or better yet, spill the tea, as Q and Rae say."

"Spill the what?" Shelby asked, unamused.

"The tea," Frannie answered. "It means gossip. Get with it, Shel. You work around teenagers all day long."

"You guys both know that you're not sixteen anymore, right?" Shelby pointed out. "You're grown women. The slang is unbecoming."

"Rude AF," Kim replied with a vexed scowl. "Don't hate because you're not as dope as we are."

"Low key, you're just jealous," Frannie chimed in.

"I'm leaving," Shelby replied as she moved to gather her belongings.

Kim lunged for her sister's arm and pulled her down in response. "Stop. We're joking. Stay," she urged in between her laughter. "I just want to know what happened. You're so private about your love life. And you haven't been on a date, non-date, or whatever, in forever. You have to get back out there. It's been years."

Shelby sighed in resignation while she deflated back into her chair. "Ugh, I don't know," she said, running a hand over her face in frustration.

"Well just start with what happened with Dustin tonight," Kim coaxed.

"Okay fine. I guess I'm just a little embarrassed, because a part of me, but for the record, a very small part, thought that maybe it was more than just the two of us getting coffee," Shelby admitted to a chorus of intrigued sounds. "I don't know… like I am aware that Dustin's been flirting with me. I'm not clueless. And I also know he was doing it in part to soften me up and get on my good side. But I also thought that he might have been genuinely interested in me. Or I don't know. I mean he's not at all my type and it's completely inappropriate, but I never stopped it either because I liked the attention. It's been a while since anybody's indulged me in that way, and Lima doesn't necessarily have a surplus of desirable eligible bachelors my age. However, tonight, I did just realize that not only has he been flirting with me because he's a suck up, I think he's also just using me to fulfill his stage dreams."

"Oh no," Kim groaned. "He didn't."

"Oh but he did," Shelby nodded as if she was in great pain. "He spent almost forty five minutes talking me through his entire repertoire and asking about my industry contracts, and it all ended with him sending me a DropBox link to access his headshots."

"What?" Frannie's head shot up from her cell phone. "You _have_ to show us. Now, Shelby. Now."

"I will do no such thing," Shelby laughed at the urging. "I will not let you guys _roast_ him. See. I'm hip too."

Thoroughly impressed, Kim leaned over to high five her sister. "Nice. But I'm sorry Shelly. That sucks. I often forget that you're somewhat important enough to be used in that way."

"Gee, thanks," Shelby flicked a plastic fork across the table at her sibling.

"I'm kidding!" Kim lifted her hands in surrender after dodging the flying object. "I am sorry. But if he's only interested in you because of your fame, then he's absolutely not worth it anyway. You're a Queen. You're probably way too good for him, let's be honest."

"Mhmm," Shelby raised her eyebrow skeptically. "Nice save, Kimberly. But it's fine, honestly. It used to happen all the time in New York. I can handle it. I'm not heartbroken or anything. And I'm not even interested in him in that way. I really do think that I just liked the attention, but I'm over it. I still think I should probably talk to him though about stopping all the flirting because I am his boss. It's unprofessional and also throwing me off my game, so I'm truly looking forward to that conversation. This is why I hate dating."

"I didn't even know you were interested in dating again?" Frannie questioned.

Shelby shrugged her shoulders noncommittally. "I don't know. I guess I'm not. Especially not now."

"Wait," Kim interjected, wagging a finger up in the air. "You actually know who asked about you recently? Jack."

"Oh yeah, he _totally_ did," Frannie confirmed. "Kim and I ran into him at the mall the other day and he very awkwardly asked us about you."

"What?" Shelby asked in an amused tone. "Jack Bennett did? There's no way. We've been friends _forever_."

"Yes!" Kim replied. "I'm so serious. He asked about your reunion with Rachel and then asked us what the deal was, if you were single."

"No he didn't," Shelby rejected the idea any further.

"Maybe your midnight ride along to the police station with your delinquent daughter and my sneaky sister piqued his curiosity," Frannie shrugged. "I mean, you could do a lot worse. He's single. He's a great guy. He was always really smart. He went to Stanford, didn't he? And it doesn't hurt that he looks like an approachable Bradley Cooper."

"Oh my god. Yes Shelly, _please_ date the sheriff. Not to mention, mom and dad already love him! It's perfect. He's perfect. For you."

"Nuh uh, nope," Shelby shook her head firmly in protest. "I'm going to stop you right there. I am not going to date Jack."

"What why not?" Kim sat up in her seat, gearing up to pitch her case. "I can't believe I didn't think of him before. We've known him since we were little kids. And now that I think about it, he always liked you. Remember how he used to fix your car for free when he worked at the auto shop in high school? And he's a family man. I heard he only gave up his fancy Silicon Valley tech job to help his dad out here."

"First of all, I think you need to stop drinking the town tea or whatever," Shelby shot her down. "And second, it doesn't matter if Jack's great or if he is interested in me because I don't want to date anyone right now. Or be in a serious relationship. I don't have the bandwidth."

"But Shelly—"

"No, Kim. I… look, I _just_ got Rachel back. A few months ago. And everything is still so new and we're still adjusting. There's a lot we still have to work out between us and figure out about our lives together, and I need to focus on her and on our relationship. I can't throw another person in the mix. I _don't_ want to factor anyone else in but my daughter right now. Dating isn't my priority. Rachel is."

"Yeah Shelby, of course," Frannie said seriously. "I absolutely get that. But I think that Kim and I just want to remind you that you can't not have both."

"And that we don't want you to limit yourself just because you think that you should," Kim added. "You're incredible with Rachel. You work so hard at your job. There's no reason for you to not find fulfillment with your personal and love life as well, if you truly want it. Women can have it all these days or at least you can redefine what your version of all is without limiting your choices. I don't want you to feel like you have to sacrifice anything. I just want you to be happy."

Shelby nodded in understanding while she carefully considered her answer. "I'm not making sacrifices, and I am happy. Honestly, the happiest I've ever been. Rachel makes me happy. Being a mom makes me unbelievably happy and sincerely fulfilled in a way that I didn't even believe was possible. I…" she paused and tried to formulate the right words to describe how she felt. "I've already missed so much with Rachel, and I only have these three and a half years left before she goes away for college. And I've already done the me-thing. I've already had the chance to do what I've wanted and concentrate on what I've needed. That's what New York was about for me. But now, I… it's time for me to focus on finding my happiness with my daughter. I want to give Rachel all of me in a way that I've missed the chance to do her entire life. And I am beginning to realize that she needs me. Truly needs me. As much of me as she can get to help her through everything with her fathers and everything that's going on at school. I want to give her every piece of me that I can, wholly and completely, because it's what she deserves."

Shelby shifted in her seat and twiddled with the golden necklace she was wearing while she reflected over what she had just shared. She stood by every part of it. She didn't need any romantic love in her life at the moment because she was already so overwhelmed with the love she held for her daughter. Considering Kim's comment, having Rachel back in her life was the first time she's ever truly felt like she's had it all.

"Oh jeez," Shelby brought her eyes up after hearing whimpering at the opposite end of the table. "Kim, are you crying? You're ridiculous."

"Don't judge me!" Kim sniffled loudly while she grabbed a handful of napkins off the dispenser to wipe her face. "Fran's crying too!"

"What is wrong with you guys?" Shelby laughed in amusement.

"That was just so beautiful," Frannie said, swiping a wad of napkins from Kim to clean off the tears also spilling down her cheeks. "You're such a good mom, Shel. And I'm so happy that you and Rachel get to be together again. You're trying so hard and you love her so much and it's so incredible. I love it. I love love!"

"Me too," Kim said then proceeded to blow her nose hard. "Shelly, I'm so proud of you, I know how much you've wanted this. I'm sorry I was pushing you about dating earlier. I just don't want you to be all alone, you know?"

"I'm not alone," Shelby shook her head. "Far from it. I have you two losers. Mom and Dad. Judy and Russell. You all support me. Even Hiram and Leroy have my back. I've got a whole team."

"Hell yes you do," Kim promised, leaning over to grab her older sister's hand.

"Damn straight," Frannie nodded, taking Shelby's other hand.

"Alright," Shelby chuckled, squeezing them both gently in gratitude before releasing her grip. "Let's get it together, shall we? Please stop crying. We're in public. You're embarrassing me."

"It's all Kim's fault," Frannie said. "I cry when she cries."

"And you both say that you're not codependent?"

"Maybe only slightly," Kim granted with an playful grin. "Okay Fran, now it's your turn! Why is Will not serenading you with cheesy '80s love songs this evening?"

"He's around here somewhere," Frannie replied, her eyes scanning the crowded coffee shop in search of her boyfriend. "We went to Sheets-N-Things earlier to pick up some stuff that he still needed for the apartment."

"I still can't believe you moved in together," Shelby commented. "Aren't you worried it's too soon?"

"I know but it only made sense," Frannie shrugged. "He was already spending almost every night at my place. And he was looking for a new apartment. He wanted to start fresh and away from the place he shared with Terri. It also just felt like the right thing to do. I really like Will."

"Just like? Or do you _looove_ him?" Kim singsonged.

"Yes," Frannie admitted, blushing a deep shade of red. "Okay yes, maybe I love him."

"Aww yes," Kim squealed. "I knew your stubborn-self would fall in love sooner or later."

"Yeah, who knew? But we're not doing anything tonight. Wanted to avoid the crowds, so we're celebrating this weekend. Will made the plans and…" Frannie paused and scrunched her eyebrows together in confusion when she caught a glimpse of a certain blonde outside darting hurriedly past the window. "What the hell?"

"What?" Shelby turned around and glanced over her shoulder to follow Frannie's gaze.

"I just saw Q walk by holding hands with some guy," Frannie replied, already up on her feet.

"Really? Quinn's dating someone?" Kim asked curiously.

"Apparently!" Frannie huffed indignantly. "I'm going to kill her. She gives me crap all the time about Will. We've already conceded to make thing as less awkward for her as possible. And when I try to level with her, she doesn't budge. Now she's keeping things from _me?_ Will and I drove her downtown tonight because she said she wanted to hang out with Santana and Britt. She didn't say anything about a boy."

Both Shelby and Kim shrunk in their seats at the unexpected lash of anger. "Maybe they're just friends?" Shelby placated.

"Just friends who make out?!" Frannie's sea green eyes lit up with fury at the sight of her baby sister kissing some random, and rather tall, teenage boy sporting a McKinley letterman jacket across the street. "Nope. Not on my watch," she decided, storming off in a furious flurry before either of the Corcorans could response.

"Well, shouldn't we stop her?" Shelby said, twisting her body to get a better look out the window.

"Nah," Kim also craned her neck to witness the showdown. "They've been duking it out for weeks. They need to fix things between them and work it out one way or another."

"Hey, Happy Valentine's Day!" Will greeted as he approached the table. "What are you looking at? Where's Frannie?"

Shelby peeled her eyes away first to answer the man. "She is outside confronting Q about the boy she just saw her with."

"Oh shoot," Will replied nervously, bearing gritted teeth. "She found out about Finn?"

Kim whipped her head to face the teacher. "You knew and didn't tell Fran?"

"Uh no, this is not my fault," Will raised his hands defensively. "I'm taking a play out of Shelby's book here. Chinese wall, right Corcoran? I'm keeping what happens at work with what happens at school separate. It's not my responsibility to snitch on the kids' loves lives with you all."

"Well no that's not quite how it works and my policy with Rach is for competition purposes," Shelby argued. "I think you should've mentioned this to Fran. And love _lives?_ Are you alluding to my daughter also having one? Tell me what you know, Schuester."

Will mentally cursed himself at having walked directly into that trap. "Fine," he yielded. "Only because I know you won't back off now, no that's not what I meant about Rachel. She is not with anyone at school as far as I know. She's too busy keeping me in line anyway. Have you seen her color-coordinated binder with Regionals ideas?"

"That's my girl," Shelby said with unbridled pride.

"Oh no," Kim feigned horror. "We don't want Rae to be as compulsive and as competitive as her mother. A mini Coach Corcoran would be _the worst_."

Laughing, Will sat down in Frannie's empty seat and peered out the window to double check that she was still preoccupied. "Hey, I'm glad I have you both here, though, because I wanted to talk to you about something."

"If you're going to ask where to take Fran this weekend—easy, take her to that great tapas place in Columbus, make sure to order that Spanish red wine that she likes, and then walk over to that French bistro down the street for the crème brulee for dessert. Boom. You're welcome, William. Bring me back a bottle while you're at it."

"Perfect," Will said in total amazement at his girlfriend's best friend. "No that sounds great. Thanks, Kim. But also I um… I wanted to talk to you guys about this," he breathed in deeply before fishing for something in his pocket, eventually pulling out a black ring box and opening it up to display an elegant princess cut diamond engagement ring.

"Is that an engagement ring?!" Kim screeched. "Will! Oh my god, what!"

"Shhh," Will hushed, unable to help the wide beaming smile from forming on his face. "I haven't asked her yet obviously. I just got this last week after I talked to Judy and Russell. I wanted to get their blessing first. And of course yours. Both of you," the man looked up with sincerity in his eyes. "You're also essentially Frannie's sisters and I want to make sure that I have your support as well. I love her. We have so much fun together, and she's put my heart back together and filled it in ways that I can't even begin to describe. And I would love to spend the rest of my life with her and your family, if you'll allow me."

"Will, of course," Shelby responded first, standing up to give the man a hug. "You're great together. I'm so happy for you both. Congratulations."

"Thanks Shelby that means a lot," Will said gratefully then turned his attention to the one person's opinion that probably mattered the most. "Kim?"

"Yes, oh my god, of course you also have my blessing," Kim said, another round of tears threatening to spill. "Let's be honest, Frannie's not going to find anyone else around here that's as weird as she is, so yes, absolutely. Not that she needs any of our permission because it's paternalistic and weird, but yes you may marry my lady. When are you going to ask? How are you going to ask? _Please_ let me help you plan it."

Will grunted when Kim launched herself into his arms and he happily drew up his arms to accept her mighty embrace. "Sure, you can definitely help," he laughed. "I don't have details yet. I still have to talk to Quinn, and you all know how she feels about me, but I also know regardless of what she says, Frannie won't want to move forward or feel comfortable if her sister's not on board."

"She will be," Shelby assured. "Quinn worships Fran, and she'll want her to be happy. She'll come around."

"Are we sure about that?" Will asked distractedly as he examined the growing increasingly heated exchange between the sisters outside. "I think I should probably go rescue Finn and break that up. But thank you, seriously. And you'll both keep it a secret in the meanwhile?"

"I definitely will," Shelby replied then nodded her head towards Kim's direction. "It's this one you have to worry about."

Kim raised her hand up to motion zipping her lips. "I _promise_ I won't say anything, if you _promise_ to call me soon so we can go over our EGP—our Engagement Game Plan."

"I promise I will call," Will vowed with a chuckle, accepting another round of congratulatory hugs before making his way out of the cafe.

"Wow!" Kim faced her sister after they were left alone. "Fran's getting engaged. You're a mom. Life happens fast."

"That it does," Shelby hummed in agreement. "What about you? Maybe Lil and Robby need a new baby brother or sister?"

Kim nearly choked on the water she just gulped down. "You're funny," she said, clearing her throat uncomfortably. "I'm perfectly content with my two. Rae's going to be the only newest Corcoran for a while."

"Mhmm sure," Shelby teased then nicked her own sip from her sister's water bottle.

"You really are great with her," Kim said earnestly. "You're an amazing mom, Shel."

"Oh I don't know about that. I'm far from amazing. I mean, I had no idea that my kid was being emotionally and physically bullied by her peers at school on a daily basis. I wouldn't say that's amazing."

Kim pressed her lips with a slight frown at Shelby's unfair assessment. "That wasn't your fault, Shelby. Rae kept it from you and her dads deliberately. And when you found out, you handled it right away. You stood up for her and you've already done everything you can since then to make it right. Cut yourself some slack."

"I know," Shelby sighed heavily. "I understand it's not entirely my fault, but I still feel guilty over it. Just like how I feel guilty about not being able to better help her work out her issues with the divorce or with how confused she still is about the surrogacy and me staying away her entire life. There's a lot I still feel guilty about and probably will always feel guilty about, but that's a part of being a parent, right? Wanting to do more but not being able to or not knowing how?"

"Shelly—"

"I call mom pretty much every other day to cry about how I feel like I'm ruining Rachel's life," Shelby laughed wryly. "And dad's come over like a million times already to yell at me about getting my shit together. It's been months, but I _still_ email Hiram and Leroy my grocery list every week to make sure that I'm not buying anything that Rach doesn't like or is allergic to. The other night, I literally fed my kid cereal for dinner at nine o'clock because I mismanaged time. Also whenever she's sleeping over, I get so irrationally scared that something's going to happen to her that I wake up multiple times just to check on her. She's not a newborn, Kim, she's fourteen-years-old. I second-guess myself every single time I have to make any sort of parenting decisions. And whenever we fight, I get so terrified that I'm pushing her away. I constantly feel like I'm spending my days putting out random fires. I don't know. But I'm not amazing. I'm not perfect. I just.. really love Rachel and really just trying my best."

"What?" Kim said, her expression full of disbelief. "Why haven't you ever called me for help? How come you've never told me any of this?"

"I don't know," Shelby admitted truthfully. "I didn't want to… what do you call it? Ruin my aesthetic, as the kids say."

"I hate you," Kim joked, laughing. "But you do know that you can come to me too, right? If you're struggling, I want to help too. You can also lean on me."

"I know, Kim. And I do lean on you, I promise," Shelby flashed a reassuring smile. "You constantly lift me up. More than you know. And I don't know if you realize, but I also look up to you. I mean I know I'm better at you at almost everything, but you're definitely my role model in the mom department. You're for sure kickin' ass, takin' names."

"Stop, you're going to make me cry again," Kim laughed, blinking back more unbidden tears pooling in the corner of her eyes. "And you're so annoying, you definitely know more teen slang than I do."

"Well of course I do," Shelby boasted proudly, finally showing her cards. "I need to know their language so I can keep them in line."

* * *

"Are you sure you wanna do this?" Jesse asked for what seemed like the millionth time. "I'm pretty sure Coach C's going to have a meltdown."

Rachel deliberated for a moment and calculated the risks and possible outcomes in her head. She peered through the window of the Lima Bean once more and looked over at her mom engrossed in conversation with her aunt. "No, but it can't hurt to try," she replied, willing herself to remain strong.

"Alright," Jesse said in a tone filled with uncertainty. "Suit yourself. You're the one that has to go home with her. Alone."

"Just go," Rachel ordered, nudging him through the door. "I'll be right behind you."

Rachel inhaled a deep breath before taking Jesse's hand and entering the coffee shop together. Despite the automatic spike in nerves that she felt, Jesse's grasp provided a calming effect over her. He gave it a gentle squeeze and glanced at her with a warm smile that for some reason inexplicably drew her closer to him. Shaking off whatever that was, she straightened her spine and focused on following through with their plan.

They weaved their way slowly through the date night crowds, making sure to walk past her mother's line of sight. When Rachel locked eye contact with the woman, she pushed Jesse slightly to pick up his pace. "Okay she saw us, go, go, go."

Gripping Jesse's hand even tighter, Rachel fought back her panic as she clumsily trailed behind him, taking them around the corner and leading them into the single unisex bathroom at the opposite end of the cafe.

"Wait don't lock the door," Rachel said, attempting to keep her voice even and measured despite how nervous she felt.

Jesse turned to face her with a matching anxiety-ridden expression. "Are you sure she saw you? How do you even know she's going to follow us in here?"

"Because I _know_ her and I—"

The sound of the door ripping open and slamming powerfully against the wall interrupted Rachel's train of thought and silenced the two immediately.

"What exactly do you think you two are doing?" Shelby demanded, blistering heat coloring her expression. "What is going on in here?"

"Nothing," Rachel said with her arms crossed, concentrating on keeping her voice from trembling. "Absolutely nothing."

Shelby's brows snapped together in consternation and she paused to assess the situation. The teenagers were both standing on opposite sides of the bathroom, fidgeting under her gaze. "Rachel Barbra, what?" Shelby asked in a tone that demanded an explanation.

"Mom did you see how fast you flew in here?" Rachel said, leaning into the jolt of bravado suddenly coursing through her. "Jesse and I aren't doing anything. We just wanted to make a point. You're overreacting."

"Excuse me?" The mother remarked incredulously.

"Jesse told me you threatened him earlier."

"Uh but I also told her I totally get why and that I understand you're just looking out for her, Coach C," Jesse piped up, darting his eyes away when Rachel shot him icy daggers.

"And I really appreciate that you do mom, I swear. But you're also being way too overprotective. Look at how you just barged in here. I already told you that Jesse and I are just friends. I know I haven't been completely honest with you lately, but I promise that if I want to date, I'll let you and dad and daddy know. I know you guys won't approve of anyone if I keep him from you. And even if I did like Jesse like that, you still shouldn't threaten him, mom. It's not fair to him. He hasn't done anything wrong. And I really don't want you to scare away one of the only friends I have in Lima."

Too shocked from the unexpected lecture from her teenager to formulate an appropriate response, Shelby only nodded her head slowly in acceptance.

"Mom?" Rachel asked after the subsequent silence that followed.

"Okay," Shelby found her voice a few seconds later, still reeling from Rachel's scolding but absorbing her valid points. "I hear you. And I am sorry," she said, directing her apology to her student. "You are both right. I may have crossed the line. Jesse, I hope you can please forgive me."

Jesse's mouth dropped open in surprise. "Yeah of course, Coach C. It's no problem. I really like Rachel… as a friend. And I wouldn't do anything to hurt her, I promise."

Softening, Shelby cast him a grateful look. "Good. Thank you. I'm sorry Rach, I…" she struggled to explain, also sincerely embarrassed by her behavior.

"It's okay mom," Rachel smiled as a peace offering. "As long as you don't kill me for tricking you in here."

Shelby laughed and shook her head, determining that her kid and her antics were going to be the death of her. "Point taken, okay? I will do better. Just please don't ever do that to me again."

"Promise," Rachel agreed. "And because you're turning over a new leaf. Can Jesse drive me home? It looks like you're still hanging out with Aunt Kim and he's about to head back and our house is on the way."

"Yeah, it's no problem Coach C," Jesse added, buying himself more time with Rachel. "I don't mind."

Deciding to back her words with action, Shelby agreed to trust the teenagers and relented warily. "Okay, that's fine. But please drive safely and text me when you get home. Both of you."

* * *

Shelby slid back into her seat a few minutes later after seeing her daughter and student off, completely missing the other person her sister was in the middle of speaking to or the distraught expression written all over her face.

"Oh my god, Kim, you will not believe what just happened with Rachel. I'm pretty sure I just endured an intervention by my own kid. I don't even know what happened, but she definitely just out-lectured me. I can't…" Shelby's voice trailed off as soon as she realized that they weren't alone. "Oh hey Dr. Peters, sorry, I didn't see you," she spoke kindly to the doctor and family friend that's taken care of her father for years.

"Hi Shelby, good to see you," the older man greeted with a fond smile. "I actually have to run, Grace is waiting for me in the car but I just wanted to say hi and tell you how happy I am that Robert's okay. I was worried initially when we had him in for tests and it was hairy for a while there when it was all inconclusive, but I'm glad we're on the other side of it. I hope you can all come over for dinner to celebrate soon. I'd love to meet your Rachel, Shelby."

Shelby's smile faltered when confusion flooded her thoughts. "I'm sorry, what? Tests? What are you talking about? Dad's been fine. He hasn't needed any tests."

Dr. Peters looked at Kim for an explanation, frowning when she hesitated to respond. "I'm sorry, Shelby. I thought you were aware of what's been going on with your father. Your sister's said that she's mentioned it to you."

"Kim?" She asked pointedly, glaring at her sister for an explanation.

Kim opened and closed her mouth soundlessly, panic settling in, the right words evading her.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to over share," Dr. Peters apologized, sensing the need to excuse himself. "But I should really go. Kim, I'll see you at work. And it was nice seeing you again, Shelby."

"Shelly—"

"What is he talking about, Kim?" Shelby cut her off harshly. "Is dad—"

"He's okay," Kim assured quickly, attempting to diffuse the situation. "I promise he's okay now. He wasn't feeling well a few months ago around the holidays and we brought him in for tests. Like Dr. Peters said, his scans were inconclusive, so they were just monitoring him. He went back to the hospital this week for a follow-up and everything's okay. He's going to be fine."

"I don't understand," Shelby shook her head firmly, struggling to absorb Kim's explanation. "If you thought dad was sick again, then why didn't you tell me? If… it's mid-February. You've known about this for more than two months and you didn't say anything?"

"Shelby," Kim said, swallowing back the guilt that formed in her throat, one that grew in size at look of betrayal all over her older sister's face. "Dad told me not to. He didn't want to worry you until we knew for sure what we were dealing with."

"Does mom know?"

"Yes but she only found out recently too. And she agreed not to say anything to you either because we know that you've been going through a lot with Rachel. You just said that you've been stressed out and we just didn't want to add anymore to your plate," Kim reasoned, her stomach twisting into a tighter knot at the way Shelby's eyes hardened in response. "Shelly, I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you, but dad is fine. He is okay. We just did what we thought was best."

"And you thought best was keeping this from me? Lying about it to me? Keeping it to yourself? Withholding important information from me because you didn't think that I could handle it? Who are you to decide that?" Shelby spat back, anger and hurt over being excluded and coddled unnecessarily rapidly taking over her emotions.

"Shelby, that's not… I just… it doesn't matter, dad's okay," Kim pleaded. "I'm sorry that we didn't tell you, but he's fine. He's going to be fine."

"It does matter, Kim!" Shelby couldn't help but raise her voice. "Of course it matters. And I'm glad he's fine, but you lied to me and you kept this from me. We're family. We're supposed to be honest with each other. We're supposed to—"

"Yeah. Honesty," Kim scoffed, also losing fast control of her emotions. "As if you've never lied to us or kept anything from us. You lied about and kept Rachel from us _for years_ , so I don't think you get to sit there and judge me for only trying to protect you."

"That's the not the same," Shelby objected. "Rachel has nothing to do with this. Don't you dare bring up my daughter right now."

"Does she know, Shelby? Does Rachel know that you kept her a secret from us for almost a decade because you were ashamed and because you were selfish? Does she know that you only decided to tell us because you couldn't handle it anymore and needed us to put you back together? Don't talk to me about honesty."

Shelby stood up suddenly and the legs of her chair screeched gratingly against the floor, which immediately pulled Kim out of her anger-fueled haze. All of the color from Kim's face drained when she focused in on her sister's reddened eyes, instant regret overtaking her senses.

"Shelby I didn't mean that, I'm so sorry, please I—"

"I can't even look at you right now," Shelby whispered, her voice full of hurt. "I… I have to go. Rachel's waiting for me at home."

"Shelby, wait!" Kim begged, still in total disbelief over what she just said. "I'm sorry, Shelly. That was a horrible thing for me to say. I didn't mean it. You're not selfish. I know you only did what you thought you had to do. I'm so sorry. I'm so, so, so sorry."

Refusing to answer, Shelby only picked up her pace to collect her belongings and then threw her jacket on in haste.

"I didn't mean it," Kim cried.

"I know," Shelby said, doing everything she could to avoid her sister's eye contact, to avoid falling apart. She also knew that she needed to leave before their fight escalated any further. Before they could say anything more that they'd both regret. "But I have to go, Kim. I just... I have to go."

Without waiting for a response, Shelby ignored Kim's calls and stormed away, leaving her sister, the hurtful words said between them, and the coffee shop as quickly as she could.

* * *

 **A/N: I know, I also hated doing that to S and K, but… sisters, am I right? Thanks for joining me for another one! Next chapter will include more of the Corcorans, more of what S learned, more everything, more soon.**


	23. Chapter 23

"Rachel?" Shelby turned to face her daughter. "You know that no matter what else was said tonight... I just don't want you to ever think that I traded life with you for the fame or the success. Because I didn't. I… I agreed to be a surrogate and distance was a part of that deal. I had to give you and your dad and your daddy the space to be a family. That was our plan. That was what we agreed on. And I…" she winced at how her voice cracked. "Who was I to take that away from them? But I… should I have asked for shared custody years ago? Should I have fought harder for a relationship with you? I don't know, Rach. I still ask myself that every single day."

Although the car was in park, Shelby was gripping the steering wheel, as if the act would keep her anchored, grounded somehow. She sighed after the subsequent silence, hating how Rachel refused to meet her gaze.

"But you have to know, baby, you _have_ to know that out of everything I've done in my life, Broadway and everything else, _you_ are the best thing that I've ever done. And I have never really known what good was until I shared it with you."

"I know mom," Rachel nodded, swallowed, and then lifted her eyes to meet green ones. "It's okay… I understand."

Shelby started at her daughter intently, wondering if she really did understand. If she ever truly could. "I'm sorry that I didn't tell them, Rach." Lifting a hand, she ran a palm over Rachel's cheek and tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.

Rachel exhaled and gave her mother the smile she knew she needed to see, albeit a very small one. "I'm sorry that you felt like you couldn't, mom."

* * *

 _Four hours ago_

"I hate that you do this," Shelby told her mother. "I hate that you call these family dinners and force everyone to come. I'm an adult, mom. You can't tell me what to do anymore."

Anne, who was in the middle of preparing side dishes for their meal, didn't even bat an eyelash at the objections. "You're right, Shelby. You _are_ an adult. But you certainly are not acting like one. You will stay for dinner. And you will talk to your sister."

"That's not fair," Shelby cleared her throat, doing her best not to let a whine escape. "I have no interest in talking to Kim. She used Rachel against me in a fight. I have never, not once, _ever_ brought up Brian or the twins in an argument. She—"

"I know, Shelly," Anne interrupted, sensing another impending blow-up from her eldest child. "Kim told me what she said, and I agree, it was uncalled for. She should not have thrown that in your face. The surrogacy was your decision and, despite how much I would have liked to have been looped in, I understand. You did what you thought you had to do for your dad. You did what you thought you had to do for yourself. But—"

"Nope," Shelby shook her head. She stood up from her perch on kitchen island then swiped the bottle of wine to her left. "There are no but's, mom. My kid? She's off limits."

Anne frowned when her daughter began to walk away. "Shelby—"

"Just call me when dinner's ready," Shelby said without turning around.

….

Fifteen minutes later, Brian walked out of the front door to find Shelby sitting alone on the porch swing nursing an entire bottle of wine.

"You sure you don't want a glass for that?" He smirked.

Shelby took another swig in response then wiped her lips with the back of her hand before answering. "Do not judge me. I was just finishing the bottle. There was maybe a glass and a half left in it."

Brian laughed at the unusually ungraceful behavior from his sister-in-law. "Mind if I sit? Anne sent me out here to get you. She said dinner should be ready in five minutes."

"Sure," Shelby scooted, allowing the man to sit in the vacant spot next to her. "Think five minutes is long enough for me to get in my car and drive away before mom can find out?"

"Nah, because I truly think that she'd somehow catch up to you and drag you back to the house by the time you reach the end of the block."

"You know my mother well," Shelby nodded, impressed.

"Sometimes I feel like I do," Brian shrugged. "Then other times, she surprises me. You Corcoran women always do."

"Sorry about that," Shelby chuckled.

"No," he shook his head. "It's a good thing. It's—it's what I love about all of you. You three always manage to keep things interesting. Rachel too. Where is Mini-Shel tonight?"

"Next door with Q and some of the other glee kids," Shelby replied, glancing over at the Fabray house. "They're _chilling_ is what Kurt told me when I dropped them off earlier. Or whatever it is kids do on a Friday night these days."

"Beats me," Brian laughed. "My areas of expertise are My Little Pony and Minecraft. But I'm glad Rachel's having fun and spending time with her friends. I know she's been through a lot recently. Is she doing better?"

"Yeah, I think so," she sighed. She hated how much she could worry about her daughter. It was so much more lately, since learning of the bullying at school. "I don't know. I know she'll be just fine because she's Rachel. She's so strong and incredibly resilient. A hell of a lot more than I ever was at her age. But I just…"

"Worry?" Brian completed her thought after her voice trailed off.

"So much," she admitted. "All the time."

"I get that," he nodded understandingly. "Absolutely. I mean, every parent does. But I think especially anyone in your situation would. I mean it honestly sounds overwhelming to me. You and Rachel trying to figure out a relationship while the kid is in the middle of going through her parent's divorce _and_ she's also trying to adjust to a new life. I'd worry too. I _do_ worry. And, I dunno, maybe this won't mean much coming from me, but from where I'm standing, I think you're doing alright Shel. I think Rachel's more than okay. And I think you'll both be okay."

A genuine smile crossed Shelby's face, remembering just how fond she was of her brother-in-law. "It means a lot, B. Of course it does."

"I know I'm not Kim," Brian said, wrapping his arm around the woman before pulling her close. "But I'll always be here for you too. And Mini-Shel. Whatever you both need, no matter what."

"You're honestly way too good for Kim," Shelby said, resting her head on his shoulder.

Brian laughed then squeezed her gently. "You're just saying that because you're mad at her."

….

Apart from the clinking of utensils, the faint sound of food chewing, and the occasional loaded sighs, a heavy silence settled across the Corcoran dining room and those who sat around it.

Wincing at how his knife scrapped gratingly against the plate while he cut a piece of his grilled chicken, Robert finally decided he had enough of the quiet.

"So Shelly, how are Regionals preparations going?" He pitched.

"Fine."

A miss.

"That's good. And you said you have an Invitational in a couple of weeks? What's on your set list?"

"Yup. AC/DC."

"Cool!" Brian's head shot up, accidentally inserting himself into the conversation. "What song are you doing?"

" _Highway to Hell_ ," Shelby replied, a lot more amicably. "I'm actually testing new choreography. And I'm tinkering with a way to use actual fire on stage without endangering the kids. Might have to engineer it a bit, but I think we can pull it off."

"I'm sure you will," Robert said, not a shred of doubt in his voice. "Let me know if you need help building any of the props," he offered hopefully. Some of his many hobbies were woodworking and robotics and between the two, he always loved the opportunity to help his daughter with stage design for her show choir team.

"Thanks, but I'll be fine."

Another miss.

"Okay," Robert smiled sadly. "That's alright. Maybe next time then. Perhaps for Regionals? I know you'll need all the ammunition to go up against my talented granddaughter."

"It's fine. I have it handled," Shelby nodded politely.

Three strikes.

"You don't have to do that," Kim piped up, wiping her mouth as a deep frown pulled on her lips. "You don't have to be rude to dad just because you're mad at me."

"Kim," Robert cautioned.

"No, dad," Kim said, turning her head to face her sister directly. "Shelby, leave mom and dad out of it. I'm the one who lied to you."

"As far as I'm concerned, you _all_ lied to me," Shelby replied, pushing her chair back from the table and rising to her feet.

"Shelby, how many times do we have to say it, dad is _fine,"_ Kim huffed in frustration. "You're the only one who's turning this into a huge deal. I am truly sorry that we kept it from you, but we would have told you if it was serious, and you know that."

"Shelby please sit back down," Anne chided gently. "Dinner's not over. You know we don't leave the table until we're all done eating."

Still unable to see past her hurt. Shelby grabbed her empty glass and tuned out her mother's calls as she walked out of the room. "I know, I just need another drink."

….

Pausing in front of the wine rack, Shelby tried to take a deep breath but it caught in her throat. She felt strangely shocked by the partial sob that threatened to escape and immediately gathered all her strength to swallow it back. She _hated_ fighting with her sister. With her parents. Family was everything to her. It would always be the most important thing. Rachel. Kim. Her mom. Her dad. They were everything. And she didn't know how to explain that by keeping this from her, she felt rejected. She felt like she was on the outside. She felt like _she_ wasn't important enough to them.

Shaking her head to clear the fog building behind her eyes, she pulled the first Cabernet Sauvignon her hand reached and brought it to the counter to open it.

"Mom I already said I was going to come back," Shelby said after hearing footsteps behind her.

"It's me," Kim said, halting on the other side of the kitchen island. "Shelly, I've already said I was sorry. And I really am. What more do you want me to do or say?"

Shelby released a disgruntled sigh and considered her answer while she expertly uncorked the bottle in one fluid motion. Remaining silent, she began to slowly pour herself more of the libation, but made sure to only fill it up halfway. While she wanted something to help take the edge off, she wasn't interested in drowning her sorrows either. Drinking always exacerbated her emotions and they were already triggered enough.

"You could at least talk to me. I've called and texted a million times since Valentine's Day," Kim continued. She was not a person who was comfortable with silence. "You can't ignore me forever."

"I'm not ignoring you, and I know you're sorry," Shelby acknowledged, finally making eye contact with her little sister.

"Then what's the problem?" Kim replied, exasperated. "Why haven't you forgiven me?"

"Because you hurt me, Kim," Shelby stated, her tone muted and flat. "And I just need some time to get over that and you pushing me isn't helping."

Her own emotions equally in overdrive, Kim struggled to keep her frustrations in check. She's apologized and asked for forgiveness. Groveled. Yet once again, her older sister's punishment did not fit the crime. "You're unbelievable. You always do this."

Setting her glass down in front of her, Shelby rose an eyebrow in a challenging manner. "Excuse me?"

Incensed, Kim clenched her jaw, attempting to temper her growing irritation. And failed. "Oh, don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about."

"I don't, Kim. Why don't you enlighten me?" Shelby retorted, getting defensive and also genuinely confused by the change of tone.

"You are such a hypocrite, and you're impossible with your double standards."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Shelby snapped at the accusation.

"This is _exactly_ how you've always been," Kim barked, unable to help raising her voice. "Whenever you make a mistake or whenever you've hurt me in the past, you _always_ expect me to forgive you right away. And I do. I do because you're my big sister and I always give you the benefit of the doubt and realize that people make mistakes and understand that nobody is perfect. But I guess that doesn't seem to matter because anytime anyone ever hurts you, whenever anyone makes a mistake, you can't extend the same courtesy and you have to pick apart every single detail and take your _sweet time_ forgiving them," she said breathlessly, pent-up frustration coiling in her stomach.

"But I let it go when you lost the necklace that grandma gave me before she died that you took _without permission_ ," she continued without pause, her anger quickly fueling her tongue. "And I forgave you when you pretended like I didn't exist and let your so-called friends pick on me for almost half a year in high school because you thought your annoying little sister would ruin your popularity. Or how about when you lied about missing my college graduation for an audition? I was fine with that. Or better yet what about the _years_ , Shelby? The years that you shut me out and made me feel like I was doing something wrong for so long because you didn't want to tell us about Rachel. What about the weeks and the months that I spent begging you to tell me what was wrong and to let me in and all you did was consistently shoot me down and reject me and lie to me and made me feel like I was nothing. Like I didn't matter. Like _we_ didn't matter. You are my big sister and for years you… I forgive you for that. I have forgiven you for that. I forgave you for not feeling like you could trust me. I forgave you denying me the chance to help you. I forgave you for not telling me about my only niece. For keeping her from me. From us. I forgave you. I do forgive you. All the time. Always. I take it. Why can't you ever just do the same for me?"

Before Shelby could even begin to formulate a response, a small voice from behind captured her attention and automatically made her heart stop in her chest.

"Mom?" Rachel repeated herself, taking a timid step into the kitchen. "What did Aunt Kim mean that you kept me from them?"

….

Rachel stalked into the living room, her feet moving far more quickly than the thoughts swimming around in her head.

"Rach, baby, please, I can explain," Shelby begged, picking up her pace to trail after the girl after she had stormed away.

Rachel balked then turned around to regard her mother and her aunt who followed with a frigid glare. "I just don't understand, mom. Why wouldn't you tell Aunt Kim about me?"

Shelby opened her mouth to speak but struggled to assemble the wayward congress of her mind.

"For how long? How long did you keep me some sort of secret?" Rachel demanded, the silence quickening the flash of anger thrumming through her veins. "Aunt Kim?"

"Rae," Kim replied after her sister, who appeared petrified, failed to answer. "It's not like that. It's—"

"It's what?" Rachel bit angrily, directing her words at her mother. "I thought you said you always wanted me, mom. If that was true, then why wouldn't you tell Aunt Kim about me? She's your best friend. You tell her everything."

"She did Rae," Kim tried to explain. "It's just that your mom had an incredibly hard time walking away from you and being away from you for years. She was just trying to figure it out herself and work through it and—"

"No stop," Rachel lifted her hand, shaking her head furiously. "Don't explain for her, Aunt Kim. Mom? Why won't you answer me? Is it because you were ashamed of me? Is that why?"

Shelby stepped back involuntarily, startled. That thought has _never_ occurred to her. The grossly incorrect accusation broke her out of her reverie in an instant. "Rachel, _no_. _Never._ I have never been ashamed of you."

The misunderstanding was clouding her judgment and despite the hurt spelled across her mother's face, Rachel refused to accept that. Ever since Shelby walked back into her life, she's been straining and putting pressure on herself to try to understand why it took the woman so long to do so. "I don't believe you. I—I think that if you wanted me, you would have told your family. You would've asked my dads. They came to you, right? You never really sought me out. You… you were perfectly fine without me. You had New York. You had Broadway. You…. you would've told Aunt Kim. If you wanted me, you would've said something—"

"Rachel! Stop!" Shelby yelled, her panic getting the better of her as her daughter's words cut into her, deep. "That's not true. None of that is true at all. I have _always_ wanted you. Do not twist my words. It's just complicated but please listen to me Rach, I wanted you in my life. Baby, I wanted to be your mom. Of course I did but it was… and I…"

"What is going on in here?!" Anne exclaimed as she walked into the room, extremely displeased with all of the incongruous behavior this evening. "What is with all the yelling? We _do not_ speak to each other this way."

"I'm leaving," Rachel decided. "I'm going back to Quinn's."

"Rachel Barbra, don't you dare walk away," Shelby warned.

"Mom I don't think that now's a good time," Kim added over the noise.

"Nobody move!" Anne bellowed, ordering everyone into an extremely uncomfortable silence. "Nobody is going anywhere. Nobody is leaving. You are all going to take a deep breath and calm down. Then we are going to finish our dinner. In peace. And _then_ we are going to talk this out and fix all of your issues with the maturity, kindness, and respect that I know you are all capable of. Do you understand? You're grown women. I know I don't need to remind you how to act."

….

"Anne, you've really outdone yourself," Brian said, licking his lips in satisfaction. "This is probably the best apple strudel I've ever had."

"Thanks Brian," Anne smiled appreciatively. "I'll make sure to wrap up extra for you and the kids."

"Seriously Ma, the crust is super flaky and buttery," Kim said with her mouth full. "Like please bury me in this when I die."

"Kimberly," Anne scolded lightly. "Please chew your food before you speak."

"And this homemade vanilla sauce is delicious, honey," Robert complimented the chef. "Brian's right. You spoil us."

"Thanks," Anne beamed at all the praise then turned her attention to the mother and daughter at the end of the table. "Rach, would you like some ice cream to go with yours? I can grab you some."

Rachel stopped picking at the pastry with her fork and lifted her head warily, forcing herself to give the older woman a smile. "No it's okay, grandma. It's great. Sorry. I'm just not that hungry. I don't really have that much of an appetite."

"Did you eat anything at Quinn's, Rach? You didn't eat breakfast this morning either," Shelby said with slight concern. "You feel okay?"

"No I didn't," Rachel shook her head negatively. "I actually came back cause I don't feel that well. I'm okay but my throat kind of hurts," she admitted, coughing on cue as if to illustrate her point.

Truthfully, she felt a little less than okay. She rarely got sick but she just knew she was on the precipice of coming down with some sort of cold. Most of the day went by in a blur because of how worn out she felt. Her throat was also horribly scratchy. And she had been battling a pulsating headache for more than an hour or so now.

Shelby frowned examining her daughter, noting her flushed and exhausted features. She reached over and pressed her hand against Rachel's forehead, moving her gentle touch to her cheek then the back of her neck. "You do feel a little warm, my love. Let's make sure to give you some medicine before bed later."

"And I will fix you up some tea," Anne decided. "Don't worry Rach, we'll have you feeling back to normal in no time."

….

"You alright, sweetheart?" Robert asked his granddaughter as he settled on the empty stool next to her at the kitchen island.

"I'm okay," Rachel nodded, eyeing the steaming cup of tea her grandma just finished brewing in front of her. "I think this is helping my throat."

"Good," he said, lifting a hand to rub the girl's back gently. "Maybe you can go lie down for a little bit after you're finished with your tea."

Rachel let out a long drawn-out yawn, rested her elbow on the counter then leaned her head against her hand. "That sounds nice," she replied, another yawn falling from her lips. "Sorry."

"Don't be sorry Rach," Robert chuckled. "It's not your fault you don't feel well, kiddo."

"I know but I still feel bad," Rachel said, her own voice sounding weak to her ears. She detested not feeling well. She was obsessive over her own health and compulsive with her diet and exercise to avoid this particular situation.

"Don't," Robert assured, smoothing his granddaughter's unkempt hair away from her face. "Everyone gets sick, Rach. We'll take care of you. You'll be alright."

"Okay," Rachel whispered, closing her eyes briefly to blink back the intense form of fatigue burning through her retinas. "Grandpa?"

"Yeah Rach?"

"Are you… are you feeling okay?" Rachel asked, sitting up so she could face the man properly. "I mean, you're not sick again, right?"

"What do you mean, Rach?" Robert asked, testing how much the young girl knew.

"I'm not as clueless as everyone thinks I am," Rachel shrugged. "Mom and Aunt Kim aren't exactly being discreet. I know they're fighting because nobody told mom about how you all thought you were sick again. And I've ran into you at the hospital like three times since I started my therapy appointments. I know you're not there just visiting Aunt Kim."

Robert tilted his head, casting a simultaneously amused and impressed expression toward his grandchild. "Definitely not clueless at all," he chuckled lightly. "I am okay, sweetheart. I promise."

"Okay," Rachel said, relieved. Deciding she needed one, she leaned over and gave her grandfather a hug, melting into his arms when he tightened his hold. "I'm glad you're okay, grandpa."

Robert kissed the top of the girl's head, lingering at the thought that it had been fourteen years before he ever got to do that. "Me too, Rach. I love you so much, kiddo."

"Love you more," Rachel replied, smiling as she pulled away. "But why didn't you tell mom? Seems like something she should've known."

Robert nodded slowly as he reflected over his answer. He'd been ruminating over their choice to keep it from his daughter over the past few days, going back and forth on his decision.

"You're right," he admitted. "In hindsight, we should not have kept it from your mother. We are a family and we should be honest with one another. But I genuinely thought I had good intentions by keeping it from her. I just didn't want to worry your mom, Rach."

"You didn't think she could handle it?" Rachel questioned. She didn't understand that logic. Her mom was the strongest person she knew.

"No that's not it at all either," Robert paused, collecting his thoughts to better explain himself. "Have you ever noticed that your mom's a bit of a fixer?"

"What do you mean?"

"Your mother—she likes to fix things," Robert said, his lips quirking into a fond smile thinking of his daughter. "She likes to help solve problems. And she's honestly good at it. Growing up, she would help your gram around the house always puttering around to make things easier for her; she always looked after and protected Kim as best as she could; she always took care of me. Always. She fixes things."

"Yeah," Rachel totally agreed with that perspective. "You're right. She fixes things for me too all the time."

"It's what I love about her," Robert continued. "Your mom's got the biggest heart I know, kiddo. Bar none. But I also think that sometimes it can hurt her. I think she thinks that she needs to be everything to everyone, at all times. I also think she feels like she can prevent people from feeling pain or discomfort. She just cares a lot. Maybe too much for her own good sometimes, and I just wanted to spare her from the worrying. She's incredible, your mom, but as a dad, I just didn't want to add any more to her plate. I wanted her to continue to focus on herself, on you. It's not because I don't think that she couldn't handle it. I just didn't want her to worry if she didn't have to. We would have told her Rach, both of you, if there was a good reason to. I promise you that. I'd never deliberately keep anything as important as that from either of you."

…

"I thought I'd find you in here," Anne said, crossing the small space of the music room to join her daughter on the love seat pushed against the corner.

Shelby's head shot up at the sound of her mother's voice and forced a weak smile her way. "How's Rach?"

"She's alright," Anne replied, sitting down next to, in her mind, little girl and pulled her close. "She's drinking tea with your father."

"Oh good," Shelby murmured, settling into the familiar comfort of her mother's embrace. Even at this age, she still felt like the entire world could be crashing down around her, but she'd always feel protected in her mom's arms.

"Still angry with him?"

"No," Shelby sighed. "I get it. I just wish you guys would have told me."

"You're right," Anne responded, absentmindedly stroking her daughter's long, dark brown hair the way she knew helped calm her down. "I'm sorry, honey. I was wrong to agree to keep it from you."

"Oh wow," Shelby remarked, looking up at the woman in shock. "Did hell freeze over? Cause Anne Corcoran just admitted that she was wrong."

"Do not get used to it," Anne laughed, lifting an eyebrow in a manner that put Shelby's Coach Corcoran glare to absolute shame. "And I will deny it if your sister asks."

Shelby rolled her eyes in response. She totally didn't get it from her mother or anything like that. Trying to get comfortable, she leaned against the woman and attempted to let her mother's warmth sweep away the overflowing hurt weighing her down.

"You okay, Shelly?" Anne prodded after the subsequent silence.

"Yes. I'm fine," Shelby said, her voice trembling slightly with uncertainty.

Anne glanced down and felt her throat tighten seeing the clear hurt and anxiety marked all over her daughter's face. "Come here, baby," the mother soothed, lying back into the couch and hugging Shelby close to her chest. "Remember when you were eight and you broke your arm at that dance competition? You didn't tell anyone about it or make a sound for hours until I came to pick you up, and then all of a sudden you burst into tears."

Shelby nodded slightly against her shoulders.

"You've always been so strong, Shelby. Always," Anne said softly. "You can act tough in front of anybody."

Except for her mother. Shelby really can act like the strongest person in the world under any circumstance but whenever she felt like everything was more than she could bear and she was anywhere near the woman, she still felt that pull to crawl into her mother's lap and disappear there. Like it was the safest place in the world.

"Talk to me baby, tell me what's wrong."

Shelby sighed and allowed a few tears to finally fall from her eyes. "I think Rachel's really upset with me, mom. And I just don't know what to do anymore. I never know how to explain to her that I didn't stay away from her because I _wanted_ to. I had to, mom. I signed a contract. I made a promise to Hiram and Leroy. She wasn't for me, but that never changed how much I did want her. And I just don't know how to explain that. Anytime I try to, nothing I say ever sounds good enough. Like how am I supposed to explain to my child that we had to be apart her entire childhood because I didn't really have a _choice_? I don't know what to do. I don't think she believes me. How do I get her to understand?"

"With a tremendous amount of patience, empathy and understanding," Anne suggested. "And also an allowance for setbacks and room for error."

She didn't have any sage wisdom to offer her daughter or a frame of reference to use in this situation. All she knew was that her first-born needed to cut herself some slack. "You are doing your best, Shelby. To put things into perspective, you just met your daughter. Five months ago. If she doesn't believe you that's because you haven't built up that trust yet. You have to earn it. And you will, honey, you just have to be patient. You and Rach will get there."

"I know but I just hate the fact that she doesn't trust me unconditionally. I'm her mom," Shelby choked out in resignation. "She's supposed to just believe me when I tell her I love her. She's not supposed to question whether or not I want her in my life. And I hate that I feel like I have to prove myself to her. I hate it."

"I know Shelby but that is the reality," Anne responded. "I can't even imagine because I didn't have to work at this with you and your sister. I've had you your entire lives, so building that relationship and earning that trust just happened organically. But since you didn't have that privilege with Rachel, you just have to be patient. The relationship that you and I have isn't going to be immediate with you and Rachel. You have to develop it. You have to work at it. And you do that by keeping promises, being open, communicating about everything, establishing consistency and routine. And you are doing all of that. I see you doing that, Shel. You are trying your best and you just have to believe that that's enough for now."

Letting out a weary exhale, Shelby untangled herself from her mother's embrace and sat forward, leaning over to bury her face in her hands. She was exhausted. Inside and out. And lost. And confused.

Anne also sighed then raised her hand to rub up and down her daughter's back in a soothing manner. She settled for just physical affirmation because she knew that anything else she could say would only fall on deaf ears. Shelby wouldn't be satisfied or grant herself any flexibility or reprieve unless Rachel herself fully absolved her. Maybe not even then either. Her daughter, the perfectionist. The fixer.

…

"So, Mini-Shel, tell me more about this NYADA social you're going to tomorrow?" Brian asked as he lifted his niece's legs, plopping down on the living room couch, and placing her legs across his lap.

Rachel sat up slightly and grinned at her uncle, grateful for the company. She really wanted to go home but her mother had come to check in on her and asked for more time to talk to her aunt. For the sake of peace, she wasn't going to deny her that.

"Is it like a super-secret club? And the first rule about singing club is to not talk about singing club?"

"No, and I only barely understand that reference," Rachel laughed. "It's just a mixer for prospective students interested in going to the New York Academy of the Dramatic Arts. It's a highly competitive performing arts college with a great musical theater program. Jesse invited me. He's been going to their events since he was a sophomore."

"Jesse?" Brian inquired with a playful tone. "Tell me more about this Jesse fella. Are you two _talkin_ g? Is that what you guys call it these days?"

"No, Uncle B," Rachel shook her head, an unexpected tinge of heat flushing on her cheeks. "We're not _talking_. We're just _friends_. He's mom's student. He's just helping me think about college. To prepare myself for the future. I want to be on Broadway."

"Just like your mama, huh?"

"Yeah," Rachel smiled in approval. "Honestly, my entire life's mission is to win one more Tony Award than her."

Brian chortled at that remark. Mini-Shel indeed. "Well don't grow up too fast, kid. We just got you."

"You could always move to New York too," Rachel suggested. "Lil and Robby can grow up with some Brooklyn accents."

"As amusing as that'd be I don't think that—"

"Oh my god!" Shelby exclaimed from the other room. "Will you _please_ just get over the basement window? It is absolutely not my fault that you and Fran weren't nearly as resourceful as I was."

Shelby stormed across the doorway in a furious flurry with Kim hot on her heels.

"Mom and dad grounded me for _a month_ for going to the Larson's end of summer thing because I got caught sneaking back in. I just remembered that you were at that party too! You had a way to get back inside the house without getting noticed and you didn't tell me!" Kim shouted after her sister, her voice rising with each word. "I had to miss Homecoming with Patrick Walker that year because I was grounded. He was hot! We could've been a thing!"

Rachel scrunched her eyebrows together in perplexity. "I thought they were fighting about grandpa not being sick?"

"Who the heck is Patrick?" Brian asked in matching confusion.

…

"I'm going to kill Kim," Shelby decided, settling an annoyed glare onto her father who followed her into her childhood bedroom. She needed space. She was nearing her wit's end.

"No you're not," Robert said, drawing his irate daughter in for an unexpected hug. "You're going to forgive your sister and we are all going to move on from this. I'm okay, Shelly-Bean. Let it go. You'll feel better."

Shelby's blazing green eyes dimmed a bit at her father's words. Liquefying at the affection, she sighed heavily as she brought her arms up to accept his embrace. She was always defenseless against her father's comfort.

"I'm sorry for being disrespectful earlier. I was just upset. Of course you can help me with VA sets."

Relief washed over Robert as he rested his cheek against his daughter's soft brown hair. "I'm sorry for not telling you. I never meant for you to feel excluded, hon that was the last thing I wanted. But please stop punishing Kim. I was the one who asked her not to say anything."

"Okay," Shelby conceded, recalling her sister's claims. There was still lingering bitterness on her end over the whole thing, but she was tired of fighting. And she had bigger fish to fry with her daughter. She needed to let it be. "Fine. You're right. I will forgive her."

"Good," Robert placed a quick kiss on her head before releasing his hold. "Thank you."

"Sure dad," she shrugged. "I'm going to get Rach. I want to get her home so she can get some rest."

Before she could step away, Robert lunged forward and grabbed her wrist, causing Shelby to turn around and meet the man's matching earthy green eyes that were surprisingly glistening with unshed tears.

"Shelby, _thank you_."

"I know dad," Shelby said, a puzzled look taking over her face. "You already said that."

Robert took his daughter's hand and squeezed it gently. "I know I don't say it enough, sweetheart, but I can't even begin to express how grateful I am for what you did for me. I know I'll never be able to repay you but—"

"Dad, it's nothing," Shelby interjected, the corner of her lips falling. She never wanted her father to feel like he owed her anything. Especially not when it saved his life. She would do it all again. A thousand times over.

"It's not nothing," Robert stated seriously, sincerely. "It was sacrifice. It was Rachel. That's everything, Shelby. Thank you."

…

"So since you and mom are feuding, are we still going to be able to hang out on Sunday?" Rachel asked her aunt while the woman helped put her winter jacket on. "Or will I have to sneak around like a fugitive to spend time with you?"

"Perhaps. Maybe you should check if _your_ basement window is bolted. I hear they're good for quick escapes," Kim teased as she drew the hood over her niece's head. "Your mom and I aren't feuding. Of course we can still hang out Sunday, Rae. As long as you feel better."

"And I'd never keep you from your Aunt Kim," Shelby cut in as she approached the pair in the foyer. "No matter what."

Kim cast her sister a grateful look, mentally berating herself for even thinking that Shelby would ever purposefully keep them apart.

"Maybe we can all get brunch together Sunday morning?" Shelby suggested, missing her sister's stunned expression at the offer as she busied herself with collecting her belongings.

"Uh, yeah, if you're sure," Kim said, a tad dubiously.

Rachel rolled her eyes at the unnecessary pleasantries. "She'll be there," she settled. "I'm going to the car before you guys start arguing about where to go for breakfast. See ya on Sunday, Aunt Kim!"

Kim drew her attention back to her sister after the slam of front door. "Shelly?"

"It's okay," Shelby nodded, finally relinquishing a breath that's felt trapped in her chest for days. "I love you, and I'll see you Sunday."

* * *

The following morning, Shelby woke up to someone's fingers grazing against her cheek. She groaned at the disturbance and tried to brush whatever was tickling her face. "Rach?" She mumbled, shaking her head slightly. "What time is it?"

"Morning mom, it's only eight so you don't have to get up, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm leaving," Rachel informed standing at her bedside already dressed and ready for the day. "Jesse's on his way to come get me for the NYADA social."

Shelby yawned as she rubbed the slumber out of her eyes, frowning when she realized she was in Rachel's bed. She had struggled falling asleep the previous evening, the events and words exchanged from dinner with her family still plaguing her mind. She stayed up for a while watching the midnight snow storm, trying to find solace in peace and quiet of the slowly falling snowflakes.

It was around three o'clock in the morning when she decided to check in on Rachel, who had resigned to an early bedtime as soon as they arrived home last night. She had a habit of watching the child sleep and at some point she must've decided to crawl into bed with her daughter.

Shelby lifted her head from the pillow and managed to open her eyes fully. "Wait Rach, do you feel okay to go? I know you didn't have a fever last night, but—"

"I've been up for a while and I made sure to eat breakfast. I also had some tea and took medicine right after," Rachel interrupted, already prepared to field her mother's inquiries. She really wanted to go to this event. "Please let me go, mom. You already said I could."

Still in a bit of a sleep-induced haze, Shelby tried to focus on Rachel, noting that the girl did look and sound better than yesterday. "Okay but—"

"I promise to call you if I don't feel well," Rachel assured. "But Jesse said it'll only be a couple of hours, so I should be home before noon. It's also at the convention center by the airport."

"Alright Rach," Shelby relented, trying to take mental notes of the details her daughter just relayed. "Please text me when you get there and when you're about to leave. Love you."

Thrilled at how easily that worked out for her, Rachel leaned over and placed a quick kiss on mother's cheek. "Thanks mom! I'll be back soon."

After watching Rachel flounce away, Shelby slumped back down on the bed in resignation. Although they had yet to discuss what they argued about last night, at least the girl was being amicable toward her. She'd take it, as long as the line of communication was open. She yawned again and closed her eyes. Although she just woke up, she felt more spent than ever. It only took a few seconds for sleep to pull her under again.

…

The startling sound of her cell phone ringing woke Shelby up again later that morning. Flipping over, she grabbed the offending object off the bedside table and examined the screen, her brows crinkling in confusion as she answered the call.

"Hey B," Shelby greeted her brother-in-law, who rarely called her, through another yawn. "What's—"

"Shel? You have to get to the hospital. Now."

"What?" Shelby's heart instantly leapt to her throat, thousands of scenarios, medical emergencies, specifically those with her father, flashed through her mind at an alarming rate. "What's going on? Is dad okay?"

"No it's not Robert," Brian said, his voice sounding small and extremely faraway. "It's Rachel. They just brought her in to the ER."

* * *

 **A/N: To be continued, but would love to hear your thoughts or predictions so far. Thank you for joining me for another one!**


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Flashbacks with time jumps are italicized and woven in throughout the chapter. Thanks for reading!**

* * *

"But I thought you said that she signed a contract?" Jesse questioned, taking his eyes off the road momentarily to glance at Rachel.

"She did," Rachel shrugged.

"So if she signed a contract agreeing not to contact you until you were eighteen, then she couldn't have really reached out," Jesse reasoned, squinting to focus past the flurry of the snowfall ahead of him. "She couldn't. She didn't have a choice."

Rachel sighed and leaned over to adjust the heat, twisting her wrist to set it to the warmest setting to counter the below freezing temperatures outside. "I know," she acknowledged. "But have you _met_ Shelby Corcoran? When has she ever not done something because it was difficult? She never takes no for an answer. She doesn't settle. She is the literal embodiment of 'When there's a will, there's a way,' which then leads me to believe that if she really wanted to be with me, if she wanted to be in my life, then she would've found a way. It's that simple."

Jesse straightened up in his seat and settled both of his hands on the steering wheel. It had been snowing on and off since the previous evening and while the roads were mostly plowed, another round of snowfall was currently blanketing the streets.

"Is it? It sounds pretty complicated to me."

Rachel let out another disgruntled sigh. She wasn't interested in analyzing the details. She just wanted to air her opinion on the matter. "No it doesn't. If it was important enough to her, she would've worked it out. I don't see any other way around it."

"Because you don't want to," Jesse said, attempting to keep his tone light. "You're being stubborn."

With a roll of her eyes, Rachel crossed her arms over her chest and turned to face the window. "I didn't tell you so you could just take my mother's side. I don't appreciate being attacked, Jesse."

"I'm not attacking you Rach," Jesse placated as he came up to a red light. He reached over to tap her arm to draw her attention back to him. "I'm just saying that it's not black and white. Yeah, Coach C does always get what she wants. But she also doesn't do things just because. There's always a reason. And I think if she stayed away, I don't think it was because it was a choice, I think she had good reason to."

Rachel only offered a terse nod in response while the awkward silence and the faint sound of pop music playing from the radio settled uncomfortably in between them.

Jesse sighed and continued driving when the traffic light turned green, mentally navigating his way toward the direction of the convention center on the other side of town. "I'm not on anyone's side here. I just think that maybe you're being too hard on Shelby. I mean, maybe she did want to be with you but she was afraid of interrupting your entire life or she thought you were fine and didn't think you needed her, you know?"

"But I wasn't fine," Rachel stated angrily, unwilling to budge. "And I did need her."

"Well there's no way she could've known Rach. I mean, let me ask you, did you ever really ask your dads if you could meet your mom growing up?"

Rachel's lips fell at that question. The answer was no. But she wasn't prepared to admit that yet. She was hurt, more than she can truly comprehend or even describe why, and she couldn't see past that at the moment. Remaining silent, she scanned her eyes across the wintry scene outside, the buildings and homes, trees and bushes coated with snow and ice that blurred by in their speed.

"I'm not trying to argue with you about it cause it's not my place and I don't think I'll ever understand how you feel, but it sounds like to me that it's anything but simple," Jesse added, casting Rachel an apologetic look. "Besides, isn't the important part that you and Coach C have each other now? That you're in each other's lives now? Isn't that what matters?"

Rachel hesitated to answer. Of course that's what mattered. But her entire childhood apart from her mother also mattered to her.

* * *

" _This is so embarrassing!" A seven-year-old Rachel sulked, throwing an arm over her forehead to complete the mood._

" _Don't worry, princess. I'm sure you, dad, and I can figure something out," LeRoy comforted, peeling the brooding girl's arm over her eyes and gave her a reassuring smile._

" _It's not the same," Rachel whined. "Neither of you have the proper range or the acting ability to execute a customized duet of 'N.Y.C.' It would be positively mortifying!"_

 _LeRoy stifled back a laugh in amusement. Even as a second grader, his daughter had a far too extensive vocabulary. "I'm sorry, Rach. But Mrs. Hoffman did say that if you didn't want to take part in the Mother/Daughter Talent Show, then you don't have to. It's okay to sit this one out, honey."_

" _Or you can do something by yourself," Hiram suggested, ruffling his daughter's hair and trying to lighten the mood. "You don't need a duet anyway. Your voice is big enough for three people, at least!"_

" _I know it is, but it's not the same," Rachel huffed a bit in frustration and stared down at the bowl of strawberry ice cream her daddy just offered her in consolation, as if the dessert could somehow provide her with the answers._

 _This year, she already had to miss the Girl Scouts weekend outing to the spa, a shopping trip to Columbus with Kitty and her mom, and now this. It was unfair. And the worst part was having to explain why to everyone. Not knowing how to explain that she had two dads and no mom. And all the pitying looks she got in return._

" _Rach?" LeRoy prodded cautiously. "You okay?"_

" _Do you wanna talk about what's running through your mind, sweetheart?" Hiram added._

 _Rachel lifted her head and looked at her dad and daddy sitting at either side of her on the couch, feeling, rather than seeing, their concern. Their comfort too. And she instantly felt some of her frustrations dissipate. Maybe she didn't have a mom. But at least she'd always have her dads._

" _No, it's okay," Rachel declined. It wasn't their fault that she was missing out. She couldn't place that burden on them. "I'm fine. You're right daddy, we can figure something else out."_

* * *

"Where is she?" Shelby demanded. She looked around desperately, trying to see everything, hoping to see _her_ everything but didn't understand why she couldn't focus in on anything. With her mind going overboard, she didn't realize that her eyes were full, but refusing to spill over. "And Jesse? Are they okay?"

Brian cut off the mother as soon as he saw her sprint into the emergency room. "They're both okay. Jesse's alright, and he's about to get stitches on his forehead, but Shelby, look at me," he instructed, moving his head to force her focus on him. "Rachel is fine. She hit her head and she was unconscious when the paramedics got to the scene of the accident and on the way to the hospital, but she's awake now and she's being responsive. Dr. Lightford's looking over her now. She's the best we have. She told me no massive injuries, nothing serious so far. It looks like she might just have a concussion. They're about to take her up to get a CT scan to confirm. You can see her, but then we have to take her upstairs, okay? She's fine, Shel. Rachel will be alright. We've got her."

Shelby blinked and watched Brian's mouth open and close a few times but she heard nothing except the pounding of her own heart in her ears. "Rachel?" She pleaded again.

"Room Three," Brian pointed behind him. "But they have to take her up soon, Shelby."

She had always been good in tense situations. Calm under pressure. Always. It's why she was so good at the jobs she's had. She could keep her cool. She could compartmentalize. But right now, she felt like she was spinning. Around. And around. Spinning.

Before she could even lay a hand on the handle, the door swung open and her entire world stopped abruptly when she caught sight of her daughter. Rachel. Lying on a stretcher flanked with blue scrubs. Her body still. Her eyes closed. "What happened? Is she okay? Brian said she was awake? Why isn't she moving?"

"I assume you're mom," Dr. Lightford answered calmly. "She is alright. We gave her some medicine earlier to settle her down and it's making her drowsy," the doctor informed, attempting to erase the look of horror displayed all over the mother's face. "She was alert earlier. A little confused and disoriented but that's expected. A bit dizzy but other mental functions and physical coordination were also okay when we tested them. Nothing I was too concerned about. She was feeling nauseous and there was some vomiting. We're taking her to CT to rule out any other brain injuries, and then we'll take her back down right after. Right now all signs point to a concussion. We're going to admit her for monitoring and, for now, take it one step at a time."

Despite the assurances, Shelby's eyes strung painfully and her throat felt like it was closing in on itself. She had to speak but she couldn't. She reached out and touched her daughter instead, needed to feel her. Needed proof. This couldn't be real. She just got her back. A warm hand found her shoulder and broke her attention.

"Shel, I've got her," Brian said. "I can't… she's family so I can't do anything medically, but I have clearance, I'll go up with them to get the scan and make sure she's okay," he promised. "We need you to stay down here and fill out paperwork. Kim's on her way."

The doctor grabbed her shoulders and steered her out of the doorway to clear the path to the elevator for the nurses, surprised at how much force he had to use.

"Wait! Stop, wait!" Shelby begged, grabbing Rachel's hand when they brought her daughter past her. "She's, um, allergic to penicillin. I-I think her blood type is AB positive. The last time she was in the hospital was uh one, no, two years ago when her dads said she got a really bad case of pneumonia. And she's a vegetarian and her iron levels have been a bit low, so her primary physician recommended she start taking vitamin supplements a few weeks ago," she rattled off, racking her brain for any pertinent medical information. "And she had a cold! She was coughing and had a sore throat yesterday and maybe a slight fever. I-I gave her some Tylenol before bed. Two of them. She was sick. She was…"

"Okay, alright, mom," Dr. Lightford interjected. "Thank you. That all helps. I'm hearing you. But we will take care of your daughter, I assure you. You can fill everything else out in the forms. They'll take her back down as soon as they're done, and I will check in on Rachel again then."

"Brian?" Shelby peered over her shoulder, still gripping Rachel's hand as if it was the last thing she'd do.

"Here," Brian pried his niece's hand away gently from the mother. "I've got her, Shel. I'll be with Rae the entire time. I promise. I'll call you as soon as we know something. She'll be just fine. We're just going to double-check that nothing else is wrong, okay?"

"Okay," Shelby forced herself to nod her agreement, unwittingly taking a step back. "Okay. Just take care of her, _please_ ," she tried to say, but the words choked off, losing her breath.

She swallowed the rest of her sentence altogether, clenching her teeth when the elevator doors opened, they wheeled her daughter away, and the door closed back again, all before she had time to even catch her breath.

* * *

" _And just where do you think you're going, Miss Rachel?" Holly Holliday questioned as she blocked the petite seventh grader from exiting the front doors of the Chicago private grade school._

" _Home," Rachel stated, pushing past her substitute English teacher, who had been filling in since Mrs. Ruiz was on maternity leave. "Let me go, please," she urged, wanting to proceed with her storm out._

" _Oh no you're not," Holly punctuated with a tsk tsk, refusing to budge and pushing the stubborn twelve-year-old away from the entrance as gently as she could. "You know the rules, Rach. You can't leave the dance early. Unless your parents can come pick you up. It's almost nine o'clock. I'm not letting you leave school grounds."_

" _Fine," the pre-teen huffed indignantly, crossing her arms in contempt. "Then I request that you please make yourself useful and call my fathers to come pick me up."_

 _Holly scoffed at the retort, both irked and impressed with the sassy demand from someone so tiny. "And I request that you watch the attitude, Miss Thing," the teacher warned. "What's going on, Rach? You were looking forward to this dance all week. It's all you, Kitty, and Marley were talking about. Even Brody asked you to be his date, right? Does he know you're leaving?"_

" _Don't talk to me about Brody!" Rachel exclaimed suddenly, stomping her foot out of anger._

" _Woah, alright then girlfriend," Holly yielded, lifting her hands up in surrender. "I'm sorry. I didn't know."_

 _Holly sighed and studied the girl carefully, noting the unmistakable hurt also mixed in with the anger. She dropped her arms and guided her still-seething student to sit down on the bench by the front office, smiling when she realized the girl couldn't even reach the ground._

" _Boys suck," Holly offered, shooting the young teen an understanding look, nudging her with her elbow. "And just between you and me, that Brody kid's a bit of a twat."_

 _Rachel's eyes widened at being read like a book and she stared up at her teacher in shock. "How did you know?"_

" _You're not the first person in the world who's had boy trouble, my lady," Holly sympathized. "Been there. Done that. What did he do?"_

 _Rachel grumbled a bit and contemplated sharing her woes with her teacher. She wasn't keen to, but Ms. Holliday wasn't like her other teachers. She was cool. She listened. And she was one of the only adults in her life who spoke to her like she wasn't a little kid. Ms. H always leveled with her._

" _He only asked me out b-because someone dared him to," she decided to answer, her voice cracking in the middle. "Kitty heard him bragging to Tommy D'Angelo and Johnny Burke about it. And then when I tried to talk to him about it, I overheard him making fun of how I look. He said that I'm not pretty."_

" _Aw Rach," Holly wrapped her arm around the girl's small frame, forgoing the usual student-teacher boundaries. Middle school was a nightmare, and there wasn't enough money in the world to convince to ever go back. "I'm so sorry. You didn't deserve that. But you definitely should not listen to him or any of those other boys. They don't know what they're talking about. You are very beautiful, Miss Thing. Do not let anyone, especially not a boy, tell you or make you feel otherwise."_

" _You're just saying that because you have to be nice to me," Rachel sniffled, casting the older woman a heart wrenching combination of puppy dog eyes and a deep pout on her lips. "They were also making fun of how I dress."_

 _Holly examined the girl's outfit surreptitiously and mentally winced. Rachel did tend to have a rather quirky-cute, borderline weird, sense of style. The girl was by no means a fashionista. But the prep-school inspired outfits were endearing. Though, maybe not to her student's peers._

 _Tonight, Rachel had on a black pleated skirt with a white frill top completed with a pair of metallic silver oxfords. A far cry from the trendy and chic junior dresses and high heels that the other girls had on for the dance this evening._

" _Don't listen to Brody, Rachel," Holly assured. "You look great, and you can wear anything you want and whatever you feel most comfortable in. I mean it. Your shoes look wicked cool to me."_

" _Thanks," Rachel managed a half smile, kicking them up in the air. "I mean, I really wanted to get a new outfit for tonight. I just didn't have the money."_

" _Why didn't you ask your dads to take you shopping?" Holly broached the topic cautiously. "I'm sure they would've," she added with confidence, going off what she knew about the girl's seemingly attentive and doting fathers._

" _I don't know," Rachel shrugged her shoulders, releasing a deep, loaded sigh. "I know that they would have, but I can't really talk to them about stuff like this. They don't even know that I'm at the dance tonight. They think we're just hanging at Marley's."_

" _Rachel," Holly admonished._

" _I know Ms. Holliday," Rachel hung her head in guilt. "Lying is bad. And I hate lying to my daddies. But I just… I never know how to talk to them about girl things. And it's always awkward. They tell me I can. But it's weird. I don't know how to explain it. And I most definitely couldn't have told them I was going with a boy, and I really wanted to go with Brody. Or I thought I did. I guess I regret it now."_

 _Holly nodded in acceptance. She understood. She couldn't even imagine what she would've done if she didn't have her own mom to help her navigate through the special hell that was being a teenage girl back in the day._

" _Don't tell them though, please?" Rachel added a moment later, a slight panic in her voice. "I'll stay, I promise. Kitty and I are sleeping over Marley's tonight, so I have to wait for them anyway. But I don't want my dad and daddy to know. I don't want to tell them. I just… I can't… I…"_

" _Hey, okay girlfriend, I won't say a thing," Holly conceded, taken aback by the girl's clear anxiety over this. "I gotcha, Rach. I understand. And this can stay between us. I promise that my lips are sealed."_

" _Thanks and I'm sorry," Rachel apologized. "For arguing with you about leaving, I was just upset. I don't know why Brody would do that. I've never done anything to him. I thought we were friends."_

" _Apology accepted, Miss Rach," Holly smiled warmly. She'd grown fond of the opinionated and rather stubborn, but also kind and unique, little girl over the past few months. She could see how much the young, impressionable girl needed a female role model in her life, and Holly didn't see why it couldn't be her._

" _I'm sorry that Brody led you on. That wasn't very nice of him. But I also wouldn't take it too personally," she advised. "There's nothing wrong with you, and that's on him for not seeing that. Promise me you'll always try to remember that? Not just with Brody. But with any boy, or with anyone, really, who ever makes you feel less amazing than you really are."_

 _Rachel sighed and leaned into her teacher's arms, already feeling somewhat better. "Okay, I guess I can try. Promise."_

" _And Rach? I know you said you can't talk to your dads about this, but if you ever really do need to talk to someone, you can always ask me," Holly offered. "I haven't told anyone yet, but Principal Scott actually just asked me to stay on for next year as well, so just come to me, if you want. I'll be around, alright?"_

" _Deal," Rachel accepted with a toothy grin. "You're the best, Ms. H."_

* * *

"Ma'am, we really need you to fill out these registration and insurance forms," the nurse urged, handing a clipboard off to the distraught mother.

Shelby felt numb standing over by the nurse's station in the emergency department. She only stared down at her hands, wondering when they began shaking. She inhaled sharply and tried to regain some feeling back into her body. A deep breath. And then another.

"Where's Jesse? St. James. They brought him in with my daughter and said that he was getting stitches?" Shelby finally managed to ask, placing the clipboard back down on the counter. "I need to see him too."

"I can't disclose that information. Are you family?"

Shelby attempted to swallow but her throat was excruciatingly dry. "No, but I'm his teacher. He was with my daughter. They're… they're friends. I just want to make sure he's okay. He's my student. He… he means a lot to me too."

"Ma'am, I'm sorry, but I–"

"Caroline, please just tell us where the kid is," Kim demanded when she walked up, instantly pulling her older sister into a hug. "She just wants to make sure he's alright.

"Kim, you know I can't," the young nurse objected. "There are rules that impede us from—"

"Car, it's my niece. This is my family," Kim reasoned. "Remember when Allie was in the ER last month? You were a wreck. I'm not asking for a lot here."

Caroline sighed, lowering her guard at the reminder. "Fine," she relented, shaking her head as she logged into the system. "Let me take a look."

"I owe you," Kim said then turned her attention back to her sister. "Rachel's dads?"

"Hiram was in Chicago this weekend to visit some friends and he's driving back," Shelby said, terrified and talking fast. "I just called LeRoy and he's trying to catch a flight out. Just depends on how Rachel is. She um.. they're thinking it's just a concussion, but they're taking her to get a CT scan right now. She was alert earlier and they said she was okay but I didn't get a chance to talk to her cause they gave her something and I… I don't know Kim. What if…"

"She'll be okay. I'll go check with Brian," Kim interrupted, rubbing her sister's arms in a poor attempt to comfort her.

"Jesse St. James is in Exam Room Five," Caroline relayed. "Laceration on the left side of his head. No other significant injuries."

"Here, give me your wallet, and let me take care of these forms," Kim said, feeling a slight twinge of discomfort with taking charge and ordering her older sister around. "I'll fill it out as best as I can and then head upstairs to see how Rae is. You go check on Jesse."

Shelby only offered a reluctant nod. If she opened her mouth again, she was afraid a sob would come out. Moving mechanically, she made her way to the designated examination room, knocking quietly before easing herself in to find Jesse alone. Shelby instantly clenched her jaw from falling when caught a glimpse of the large, bloodied gash located just above the boy's left temple.

"Coach C, I'm so sorry," Jesse said, rising to his feet immediately at the sight of his teacher. "I didn't… it was black ice and I lost control of the wheel. I tried to... I'm really sorry, Coach. I didn't mean to. I'm _so_ sorry. Is Rachel okay? They separated us earlier and they made me stay here."

Shelby shook her head and closed the distance between them. She wrapped her arms around Jesse and instant relief entered her body at the fact that he was here and okay, mostly unharmed.

"Hey, listen to me, it was not your fault," she said, pulling her head back to check over any other injuries. "It was an _accident_. Rachel will be alright. They're just checking now to make sure there's nothing serious going on. Are you okay? Where are your parents?"

"My mom was just here, she's downstairs now grabbing me something to drink, and my dad is on his way I think," Jesse answered with a quiver in his voice. "Coach C, I didn't mean to. I swear I was driving carefully."

Shelby always saw her star student as a leader. Confident. But right now all she was a little boy, who appeared as rattled as she felt.

"I know Jesse, I know. It's not your fault. I'm not blaming you. I'm just so glad you're both okay."

"Coach—"

"I don't care, Jesse," Shelby said adamantly, smoothing away his unkempt curly hair, taking his face in her palms to force eye contact, not missing how his rosy complexion was replaced with a grim paleness.

"I don't care what happened. I know you would never do anything to intentionally hurt Rachel. It was an accident. The weather is horrible. It happens. I'm the one who shouldn't have… It's okay. All that matters is that you're both alright."

Jesse fell into his teacher's arms again, releasing a breath that shook right out of his chest. And Shelby tightened her hold when she felt him trembling. "It was an accident," she repeated. "It's not _your_ fault."

…

"Hey! There you are," Kim jogged up to Shelby standing outside the entrance of the emergency room. She placed her hands on her hips, pausing to collect herself and inhaling a massive breath to appease her lungs' need for oxygen since she just ran around searching for her sister.

"What are you doing? Why are you out here? They're done with the CT and they're taking Rachel to a room. It was negative. She'll be okay."

Shelby halted her pacing the same time her heart stopped in her chest. She was so relieved that she couldn't breathe, and without warning, turned around and ran to the garbage can, bending over and throwing up her stomach's entire contents. Her insides coiled and twisted, forcing her to retch and cough as she attempted to catch her breath.

"Oh my god!" Kim sprinted over to her sister vomiting over the trash bin. "Are you okay?"

Shelby shook her head and drew her arm back to keep Kim away. A few dry heaves later, she straightened up, wiping her mouth with the cloth of her long sleeved t-shirt. "Ra—Rachel's okay?"

"Holy shit, Shelby," Kim remarked, full of concern. "Yes she's fine, but are you alright? Are you sick too? Here, let me take you inside."

"No," Shelby shook her head weakly in objection. "No. Stop, I'm fine," she placed her hands on her knees and leaned over, sucking in a couple of sharp breaths.

"Shelby, you're not fine. You're clearly sick," Kim argued, taking in her sister's eyes, darkened with circles and filled with tears, gazing up at her miserably.

"No I'm not," Shelby replied a couple blinks later. "I just—I don't know what I'm doing."

"What are you talking about? Rachel's fine. You just have to go up and see her. They're taking her to her room. She was in and out and a little disoriented, but she was definitely asking for you. Come on, let's go."

"No," Shelby declared willfully. Despite her knees feeling like rubber, she forced herself to stand up straight. "I can't. I don't—can you go stay with her, please?"

"Shelby, what?" Kim asked in sincere confusion. Why were they wasting time debating this?

"I _can't_. You go up and see Rach, please? I just need a second. I don't—"

"She's asking _for you_ and her dads. And since two of the three aren't even in the state, I think that means you have to step up to the plate," Kim replied in disbelief. If it were her, she'd already be halfway up the stairs. "Let's go."

"I was asleep, Kim!" Shelby shouted unexpectedly, startling her sister. "It's _my_ fault. I was asleep when Rachel left this morning. I didn't… I didn't even get out of bed. I wasn't thinking clearly, and I didn't check the weather. I… she was sick. I should've never let her leave in the first place. She and Jesse wouldn't even be here if I was paying attention. I should not have let her go."

"Shelby _stop_ ," Kim begged, her heart breaking wide open at the guilt marked all over her sister's face. "I know what you're thinking and I know exactly where your head is going here, but it is absolutely not your fault. It's no one's fault. It was a literal accident. The ER is flooded because of the weather today. This shit just happens. But they're both fine, okay? Let's just go see Rae and you'll feel better. I promise."

"No," Shelby said, her voice now quiet because she knew she was close to tears, her eyes were sparkling with them. "That's not just it. I just… I don't know what I'm doing _at all_. I didn't know how messed up Rachel felt about everything. I didn't know about the bullying. She doesn't trust me. I don't know how to help her. I don't know what to do about any of it. I don't know how to be her mom. I can't."

"Shelly, you can," Kim said, with all the conviction she could muster, astounded at the raw insecurity in her sister's voice. "You have to."

"I can't," Shelby said, her insides still twisting and turning. She flung herself toward the garbage can again a second later, expelling a second round of all the current stress coiling in her stomach. After she was done, she keeled over to spit and regulate her breathing, not caring how unseemly she probably appeared at the moment.

"Shelby, please let me take you inside," Kim urged, patting her back gently. "Rachel really wants to see you, and… yes, I can't even begin to imagine how you must feel about all of it. But right now, that doesn't matter, because your daughter needs you. You've been doing everything you can. Please cut yourself some slack. You need to. You're being so hard on yourself."

"Kim," Shelby shook her head, unable to navigate past the chaos in her head to see reason. "Just go upstairs for me, please. I can't right now."

She began to walk away but Kim stepped in front of her so she was forced to stop.

"No Shelby, absolutely not," Kim reprimanded. "You are not doing this right now. I get it. I know that things with Rachel have been difficult but you need to set that aside right now because being a mom isn't about knowing what to do about everything all the time, half of it is just showing up. Being there. And right now, she needs you. Not me or Brian. You. Rachel needs you."

"No, she doesn't," Shelby said, completely believing it in this instance. "She doesn't need _me_."

"Shelby—"

"Kim, stop! _Please_ just go. Just leave me alone. I can't. I seriously can't."

"Fine!" Kim exclaimed, raising her voice to match. "Fuck. Fine. But when Rachel's fully awake soon and you're nowhere to be found, do you think it's her that's not going to be able to forgive you for nothing being there? No. She'll get over it because she loves you and she understands that you're doing your best. _You're_ the one who's not going to be able to live with yourself. Jesus Shelby, you're so concerned with being a good mom, whatever the hell that means, that you're completely forgetting how to just be one. You're a mom. Everything else will figure itself out. Just start acting like one and be there for your daughter."

* * *

" _Hey princess, you ready to go?" LeRoy asked, standing by the doorway._

 _Rachel looked around her empty childhood bedroom and shrugged. No she wasn't ready. She wasn't ready to leave the only home she's ever known. To say goodbye to the life she shared with both of her fathers. To wake up tomorrow in a new home, in another state, without the other half of her family._

 _To have everything change._

 _She wasn't ready for any of it._

" _Yeah, I think so," she forced herself to reply, clearing the lump in her throat. "Is dad downstairs already?"_

" _He's almost done packing up the car, and then I think you're going to get gas and then hit the road," LeRoy informed, throwing a weak smile her way. "Do you need help carrying that?" He offered, pointing to the lone, stray box that remained on top of the bed with his tired eyes._

 _Rachel peered at the package, her heart rate escalating at the suggestion. "No," she answered abruptly, crossing the room to pick it up before her father could get to it. "It's fine. It's actually for storage," she finally decided._

 _They had been in the process of moving and packing, dividing up their home, throughout the past couple of months and last weekend, she stumbled upon this box. The only tangible proof she's come across in almost fourteen years about her birth mother. In it, were long-forgotten maternity clothes, books about pregnancy, half-empty bottles of prenatal vitamins, and the journal. A small, black moleskin notebook with narrow ruled pages and only one entry inside of it dated December 1 that had written:_

" _Dear Baby,_

 _If you ever wonder how I felt about giving you up, it's this_ — _I'm terrified."_

 _That was all it said. Nothing else. She'd read that one line so many times in the last week, she's certain that it was permanently ingrained in her brain. She came close to asking her dads about it, the closest she's ever been in her entire life, but inevitably balked at the last minute. It never felt right to. Especially not now._

 _And it worked two ways. As much as she wanted to know more about the woman that she shared half of her DNA with, as much as she maybe even needed her, her birth mother also had to feel the same way. And the fact that it had been radio silence, no attempted contact, ever, suggested to her that maybe her mother, her mom out there, just simply didn't want to._

" _Actually, they're_ _just dads old running shoes that he forgot," Rachel felt awful lying. "Can you take it with you to storage?"_

 _LeRoy glanced down at the box as he accepted, and nodded. "Sure, princess. I'll take care of it."_

" _Thanks," Rachel said, leading her daddy out of her room without as much as a glance back._

 _She'd gone this far without her mother. She wasn't going to wait for her to show up now._

* * *

Standing over the hospital bed, Shelby stroked Rachel's hair away from her sleeping face, and her heart wrenched, used to looking through swimming eyes.

When the long, thick lashes that her daughter inherited from her began to flutter, Shelby froze. As soon as she caught a glimpse of Rachel's deep, brown eyes, she blinked quickly to stave off the tears. She only ever wanted her daughter to see her strong.

"M-mommy?"

"Baby, I'm here," Shelby said softly, leaning over to kiss Rachel's forehead. "It's mom. I'm here."


	25. Chapter 25

With a slow inhale, Rachel attempted to regulate the pounding in her chest as she stood in front of her closed bedroom door. She patted down her pockets to double-check that she had everything she needed: cell, keys, headphones.

She glanced at her clock one more time. It was almost six in the morning. If she timed it perfectly, she could run a quick loop, be home, and back in bed before her mother got up for her shower at precisely six thirty.

She sincerely didn't want to be sneaking around, but she couldn't help it. It's been almost a month since the car accident, and she's been under an indefatigable Coach Corcoran lock down since arriving home from the hospital.

Really, her mother left her no choice.

Mustering up the courage, she twisted her wrist and opened the door, slowly easing herself into the hallway. Comforted by the sight of her mom's still-shut bedroom door, she half-sprinted down the hall and halted at the top of the stairs, turning back around to make sure there was no movement from her mother's bedroom.

Once she was satisfied, she zipped up her lightweight running jacket, drew in another breath, and tapped into the bravado currently coursing through her veins. She crept down the stairs for a few moments before breaking out into a full-out jog toward the last steps. As soon as her feet touched down on the ground floor, the foyer light flicked on abruptly.

She screamed.

"Good morning to you too, Rach," Shelby greeted with a raised eyebrow as she stepped into view. "Let's try not to wake up the neighbors, shall we?"

Still clutching her rapidly beating chest, Rachel threw her head back and groaned audibly in intense disapproval. "Oh my god, mom! You scared me! Where did you come from?"

"The kitchen," Shelby replied nonchalantly, lifting up her tumbler filled with freshly brewed coffee with one hand to offer as evidence. Truthfully, she had pieced together her kid's not-so-sly attempts at sneaking out since the previous evening. She had been up the past hour in anticipation of the teenager's attempted getaway.

"And where do _you_ think you're going?"

Rachel swallowed hard against the panic rising in her throat. "Nowhere," she shrugged, struggling to keep her voice from wavering. "Just woke up early and wanted to get something to eat."

Shelby nodded, unamused. "And you needed to wear your running shoes, workout clothes and a jacket to go to…. the kitchen?"

"I, uh…" Rachel opened and closed her mouth dumbly. "Mom!" She whined a beat later.

"Yes, my love?" Shelby asked innocently, stifling back the entertainment she felt from filtering onto her face.

"Ugh! You are _the worst_ ," the teenager professed as she began to slip her jacket off and untie her shoes in a purely defeated manner. "Why won't you let me just go for a short run? I feel better. My head is fine. I haven't been dizzy in like a week. I haven't had a headache in days. _Please mom?_ Exercise is good for you. Healthy, in fact."

Shelby sighed in resignation. While all valid points, she was still leery of allowing the girl to push herself. They were in the hospital _twice_ over the past month. First after the car accident and the second when they took a trip back to the ER after Rachel's concussions symptoms exacerbated for the worst. Though she knew she was toeing the line between being cautious and being overprotective, she only wanted to ensure that the girl recovered properly.

"Rachel, you know what the doctor said about—"

"I know, post-concussion syndrome," Rachel completed with an eye roll as she stalked into the living room.

"Baby, it's a mild—"

"Form of brain injury and we have to take it seriously," she regurgitated her mother's seemingly favorite talking point at the moment. "I _know_ , mom. You've told me. But the doctor also said that when symptoms begin to diminish that I can slowly ease into normal activities but _you_ won't let me do anything! Isn't it bad enough that we had to cancel our trip to London? This has been the worst spring break, _ever._ "

Shelby gritted her teeth together to impede an unnecessary retort from escaping. Gone were the days post the accident when her daughter allowed her to dote on and care for her unprompted and the nights when she found the girl in her bed seeking her comfort. That Rachel she missed. In her place now, was a stubborn, unconcerned, and slightly reckless teenager who insisted in pushing her boundaries and putting herself at risk. It was her job to draw the lines.

"Wait a second…" Rachel interrupted her thoughts with a scorching and accusatory tone when she finally noticed that the older woman was donning her own workout outfit. "Where are _you_ going?"

Clearing her throat, Shelby shrugged her shoulders casually. She was the adult. She had nothing to hide. "Well _I_ am not suffering from head trauma, so _I_ will be going to yoga this morning."

Rachel's jaw scraped the floor at the answer. "Are you serious? Mom!"

"I will be right back to take you to your therapy appointment at nine," Shelby lifted her hand, waiting for the agitated teen to cease her protests before she continued her instructions. "And then _tomorrow_ is your checkup with Dr. Lightford and _if and only if_ she gives you clearance, I promise I will allow you to return to your normal activities. I am not trying to torture you here kid, I just want to make sure we're not doing anything to jeopardize your well-being. I'm truly sorry if you are frustrated, and I understand. But I am only looking out for your best interest here, my love. I promise you that."

Rachel issued a dejected sigh, her entire resolve and appearance crumbling. "This is so unfair."

"I know baby," Shelby replied softly with a sympathetic smile, reaching out to tuck the girl's hair behind her ear and away from her long face. "But after the doctor gives you the OK, we can go slowly and move on. One more day, honey. In the meanwhile, I will take this," she said, leaning over to swipe the keys out of Rachel's jacket pocket. "And this," she added, bending down to pick up the girl's running shoes. "With me. Get ready, eat breakfast, take your medicine, and I will be back in an hour."

Appalled at the level of mistrust, Rachel scoffed in total insult. "Mom!"

"And since you're already up, you should call your daddy. You missed his call again yesterday," Shelby ordered, already halfway across the room. "Make sure to eat! Call me if you need anything please."

"Ugh!" Rachel threw her arms up in the air. "The only thing I'm suffering from is _YOU!"_ She shouted at her mother's retreating form.

"One! Day! More!" Shelby only sang in response to the tune of the seminal _Les Mis_ classic, punctuating it with the slam of the front door.

* * *

A few hours later, Shelby was walking a step behind her child as they navigated their way through the hospital parking lot.

"So your appointment went well, Rach?"

"Mhmm, it was fine," the teenager shrugged without any further elaboration.

"That's good," Shelby replied, quickening her strides to match her daughter's suddenly sped up pace. "And I don't mean to sound like a broken record, hon, but you know that you can always talk to me about anything you bring up in your sessions. I just want to help… too."

Rachel nodded her head distractedly, slowing down her steps as they approached the Range Rover. "I know mom, thanks. I just…" her voice trailed off, pausing to brace herself as one does with a rogue wave.

She halted her movement instantly and caused her mother to bump right into her.

"Oh sorry," Shelby began to apologize, stopping short when she took in her daughter's troubled expression. "Rach? What's wrong?" She asked worriedly; stepping forward in time to watch as something akin to fear wash over the girl followed immediately by brief panic.

The silence and the moment engulfed them both.

Breaking out of it first, Shelby reached out tentatively and placed a hand on her shoulder gently to draw her daughter away from wherever she just went in her head. She had noticed that her kid has had some slight anxiety about riding in the car after the wreck, but nothing as discernible as this. "Rachel, baby, are you okay?"

Rachel blinked hard as she fought through the completely unexpected eel of panic wiggling through her. "Y-yes, sorry," she breathed out through the tightness she felt in her chest. "I'm okay, sorry."

"It's alright," Shelby shook her head, flooded only with concern as she followed the teenager's line of sight toward her car. "You don't have to apologize. You're okay, baby. What, uh, what's going on? What just happened?"

"Nothing," Rachel answered promptly and cleared her throat uncomfortably, embarrassed by her sudden fit of anxiety. Admittedly, she didn't even know what just happened. She was somewhat on edge after her therapy session, her emotions raw, so she's just going to chalk up that random episode to that. "I'm fine," she bounced back brightly, plastering on a reassuring smile to her face to appease her mother. "Sorry I just… I don't know but I'm fine. I swear."

Shelby scrunched her eyebrows together in contemplation determining quickly that her daughter was lying. Even only after a few months, she's been able to learn almost every inflection in her voice and every tick of emotion in her face that told her when the girl was being less than truthful. Though she knew better, she dismissed it for now. Rachel never responded well when she was prompted under pressure.

"Okay," Shelby began warily. "But—"

"Let's just go home," Rachel cut in, pulling her shoulder away to resume their trek to the car. "I'm actually kind of tired now and what do you _always_ say about me getting enough rest?"

"Alright," the older woman objected with a scoff, buying into the teenager's attempt to lighten the mood. "Who's the one who woke up at five in the morning with the intention of sneaking away _from me?_ "

"And who woke up even earlier than that _just_ so they could catch me?" Rachel countered, rolling her eyes at her mother but unable to repress a smile. "I bet you're even more tired than I am."

"Okay nobody asked you," laughed Shelby as she pushed the girl playfully toward the passenger door. "Get in there before I decide to leave you here."

"Try it," Rachel taunted. "Maybe I can finally get some running in!"

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Rachel reclined back into her seat after switching the radio station again for the countless time. She then drew the mirror down briefly before closing it back up. Next she flicked the window switch for a few seconds before leaning forward again to adjust the heat from low to high and back again.

"Alright, stop moving kid, you're distracting me," Shelby gently chided, using her free arm to pull her daughter back. "Why are you so fidgety?"

"Still can't believe you drove out of the parking lot without me," the teen grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest in contempt as she tried to relax. "You've got jokes, mom."

"Let that be a lesson in what happens when you challenge me," the mother warned while she pulled onto their street.

"Um," the teenager shot straight up as soon as the house came into view. "Speaking of challenging you—"

" _Rachel Barbra,"_ Shelby groaned loudly in disapproval. "Why is your grandfather's car in the driveway? And your Aunt Kim's? _And_ Frannie's?"

"Um well—"

A friendly honk from the vehicle behind them catapulted their attention to the rear view mirror.

"And your Uncle Brian!"

"You left me no choice!" Rachel exclaimed, raising her hands up in surrender. "I'm _sorry_. But I had to call in for reinforcements. I've been so _bored_. And you won't let me do anything!"

"So your solution was to invite our entire family over?" Shelby asked in disbelief as she pulled onto the curb, seeing as all the vacant spots in her driveway were occupied.

She threw the Range Rover into park before turning to cast an erosive glare toward her devious child. As much as she enjoyed spending time with her family, she didn't appreciate the unexpected visit. She had plans. She had hoped for them to have a relaxing day before Rachel's final checkup tomorrow. Alone. She wanted to ease into a conversation a month overdue that she knew they had to have. She needed them to talk.

Shelby sighed.

"You're not grounded, Rachel. Or in jail. You could've asked to see your friends or gone over to your Aunt's or grandparents'. We could've done something. Or you could have even just told me you wanted to have people over. You don't just summon everyone over here simply because you're _bored_. What did you even tell them?"

"Um, well," Rachel stammered, shrinking effectively at her mother's biting scowl. "I told grandpa you needed help fixing the sink in your bathroom, which you do! I asked Uncle B to drop off some more of those pudding cups I really liked from the hospital on his way home. Grandma's in Columbus shopping with Mrs. Fabray. I told Frannie that you were cooking lunch. Quinn was with her. And I… I think it's best if I don't tell you what I said to Aunt Kim."

"Ra-chel," Shelby growled in exasperation at her far too dramatic fourteen-year-old.

"Hey!" Kim's muffled voice interrupted right on cue as the woman walked up to the driver's side then tapped on the window. "Get out of the car, Shelly! Rae says you need an intervention."

* * *

"I just feel like I'm overreacting because it's not like I was in this huge traumatic car crash," Rachel admitted as she plopped back down onto her bed, staring up at the ceiling despondently. "We were lucky. People have suffered a lot worse. I had, what, a few headaches for a couple weeks but that was it, and now I'm having trouble getting in the car? I need to get over it."

"I don't know," Quinn shrugged as she swiveled on the desk chair in Rachel's bedroom, measuring her words carefully before stopping. "You hit your head pretty hard. On the Cheerios, Coach Sue always takes concussions pretty seriously. You were in the hospital for two nights and I saw pictures of the car. It was totaled. I'd say that's kinda traumatic."

Rachel lifted her head from the pillow to make eye contact and said seriously, "Well the only thing that's _really_ traumatic is dealing with my mom lately."

Quinn laughed but not too loudly in case the older Corcoran could somehow hear her. "Yeah, I'm sorry you didn't get to go to London like you planned but if you're trying to compare dreadful experiences, I've spent half of spring break wedding planning with Fran and _Mr. Schue."_

"Yeah. No offense, but marrying your sister is the _worst_ thing Mr. Schue's ever done to me and the New Directions. He's been so distracted recently. We absolutely need to start taking glee a lot more seriously or else we're going to lose to my mother and I simply can't live with that."

"Oh!" Quinn said as realization hit her. She got up and scrambled onto the bed, pulling Rachel up to face her. "Wait. Speaking of VA. I ran into St. Jack… sorry, Jesse, earlier at the Lima Country Club while we were looking at venues. He asked about you."

Rachel's expression hardened as if she had a toothache, a deep frown pulling at her lips. "Oh, what did you say?"

Quinn shook her head negatively. "Nothing really. I told him he should probably ask you that. You two still aren't talking?"

"Well _he's_ not talking to _me_ ," Rachel clarified, doing her best to keep her emotions in check. She was not going to let stupid Jesse St. James, or, more accurately, a lack of response from him, affect her any longer. "I don't even know. We were completely fine before the accident and even a few days after it but then after that—total radio silence. He hasn't texted or called me back. I've been to rehearsals with my mom a few times and he just walks away."

"Do you think Shelby said anything to him?" Quinn suggested cautiously.

"No I don't think so," Rachel rejected the thought. "I mean, I asked her and I actually think she was coming around on us being… friends. But, whatever, I don't think I did anything wrong, so I will not waste any more time wondering what's in Jesse's head or better yet, what isn't, because he's being dumb. He'll come to me when he's ready to talk."

"Yeah, or I hope he doesn't," Quinn said with a sly smirk. "We could probably channel that angry-Berry attitude toward beating VA at Regionals."

"Oh you don't even know," Rachel remarked in a tone bearing someone who sounded like she was making an unbreakable vow. "Let's talk Regionals."

* * *

"You really don't have lunch ready?" Frannie asked again hopefully, closing the fridge after checking it for a second time.

"For the last time, _no_ ," Shelby replied, fishing her wallet out of her purse before tossing it at the blonde. "I was not expecting company. But I just got off the phone with mom and she and Judy are on the way back to join us, so can you please go and grab lunch for everybody?"

Frannie's face lit up with interest as she caught the wallet in one smooth motion. "Anything?"

"Anything," Shelby nodded her agreement as she attempted to tidy up her already-impeccably clean home. "But make sure there's enough for at least ten people because I assume your dad's also going to stop by."

"You got it boss," Frannie fake saluted. "Be back soon."

"Famous last words," Kim said with a raised eyebrow as she watched her best friend merrily skip out of the kitchen. "I'm pretty sure Fran's going to come back with pounds of pasta from Breadstix."

Shelby only hummed in acknowledgement as she continued to wipe down the kitchen table, not breaking from her mission.

"Shelly," she grabbed her sister's arm to draw her down on the stool next to her. "Can you sit down? You're making me nervous. What's going on?"

Shelby sighed, setting the canister of disinfectant wipes in her hand on the counter before granting her sister's request. "Sorry."

"It's fine," Kim replied with a shake of her head, flashing a reassuring smile her way. "What's up? And don't say nothing because you clean when you're stressed and it's more sterile than a hospital in here. Sorry I didn't warn you about coming over, but I didn't think you'd mind."

"No it's alright," Shelby said, running her hands through her hair absentmindedly. "Of course you're always welcome here. I'm just distracted. Rachel just had another… moment earlier on our way home and I don't know, she just won't talk to me about things going through her head. There's the car thing. She's also ignoring LeRoy for whatever reason that Hiram and I can't figure out. And I always ask her to talk to me and tell her that she can come to me for anything but I don't want to force her either. She only ever does when things reach its boiling point."

"And you two still haven't talked about what happened at mom and dad's last month?"

"Hmm? No," Shelby answered, positively morose, leaning her head that felt as heavy as bronze against her hand. "And I'm not exactly jumping at the gun to because we've been fine, you know? She's needed me. We've been preoccupied. We've been okay. I don't want to push it. And I definitely do not want to push her."

"Yeah… but maybe you should?" Kim suggested after some consideration. "I mean, how else can you and Rae move forward if you don't address the things that's bothering the both of you. Ignoring it won't make it go away."

"No," Shelby agreed with a small smile at her little sister. "You're right. It won't."

"Wait," Kim paused, her mouth hanging down and eyes wide open. "Did you just say…."

Shelby groaned at the triumphant expression spreading across the younger woman's face. "I take it back!"

* * *

Later that evening, Rachel paused in front of her bedroom door yet again and allowed herself a moment to collect her emotions before she stepped out into the hallway.

She tiptoed toward the top of the landing first and tried to listen for any movement downstairs. Hearing none, she turned back around and headed for her mother's room noticing a dim light illuminating the doorway.

Before she could even knock on the partially closed door, her mom's voice called from inside. "Trying to come in here or trying to sneak away again, Rach?"

Shelby sat up as she watched her daughter enter the room, her eyes downcast.

"Can we talk?" Rachel asked timidly as she absently fingered the hem of her mom's NYU t-shirt she's come to love to wear. She looked up nervously and watched the woman throw pillows off and pull the covers up on the other side of the bed.

"Sure," Shelby gestured for the girl to join her. "What's going on?"

Rachel climbed into bed next to her mother and drew her knees up close to her chest and began toying with the edge of the plush duvet before she felt calm enough to speak. Inhaling a large breath, she began. "I'm sorry, mom. I shouldn't have tried to go out without permission this morning. _And_ ," she paused for effect. "I'm sorry about fighting with you about my recovery. I know you and dad are only trying to look out for me and I realize now that I've been arguing with you about it at every turn. I wasn't being fair. I probably wouldn't have gotten better this fast if it weren't for you and your help, so I wanted to thank you too… for everything. I," she stopped to take in another breath in the middle of her extensive speech and to swipe away a few errant tears. "And you're also kind of crazy, sometimes mom, but I love you. And I—I don't know what I would do without you. I know I said it already but I really am sorry."

Blinking back her own tears, Shelby pulled Rachel to her side and tucked her daughter's head underneath her own. "It's okay," she said with a contented sigh as her child slowly settled beside her. "Apology accepted, my love."

Rachel nodded gratefully and latched onto her mother as the comfort of being in each other's arms enveloped them both.

* * *

 **A/N: I'm back! More soon, thank you for reading!**


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: Hi all, sorry for the longer than usual wait for this update, but a friendly warning that as of right now, I'm planning four to five more chapters to wrap this story up ~give or take because we all know about my gross inability to write concisely/struggle with letting things go! But it's been almost a year since I first posted EC, so I'm excited to see this through with you guys.**

* * *

 ** _Quinn:_** _How did the doctor go? All clear? And can u come over tonight? I'll send a text to everyone and we can talk more about ur Regionals plan ;)_

 ** _Rachel:_** _ALL CLEAR! :D_

Rachel lifted her eyes from her phone to watch her mother exchange a brief conversation with the receptionist at the doctor's office before they headed home.

 **Quinn:** _Awesome! Congrats on being concussion-free!_

"You ready to go, Rach?" Shelby asked the distracted teen a moment later while she stuffed the medical forms in her hand into her purse.

 **Rachel:** _Thx! So happy. Not sure about tonight. I'm in but have to ask mom first._

"Hey! Watch it kid," Shelby warned as she lunged for the hood of Rachel's jacket, pulling on it to keep the girl from walking right into the door. "Sheesh, we haven't even walked out the door and you're already going to give yourself another concussion."

"Oh sorry," Rachel remarked in shock at the almost accident, peeling her attention from her phone to meet her mother's piercing glare of disapproval.

"Who are you even texting?" Shelby prodded, guiding the teen safely out the doctor's office and into the hallway.

"Quinn. She's asking if I can go over to her house tonight? I think the rest of the glee kids are coming over. Can you drop me off later and then dad can just pick me up afterwards, since I'm spending the weekend with him?"

"Actually, you're spending the weekend with me," Shelby said brightly. "I have a surprise."

 **Quinn:** _Just lmk! It was San's idea to talk about this before we go back to school Monday. More privacy._

Rachel's head shot up, intrigued. "Really? What is it?"

"What do you think about going away for the weekend?" Shelby pitched, nervous about the reaction to her rather impulsive and extremely last minute decision.

"Where? Chicago for the weekend? Or are you taking us to London now that the doctor said I could travel? Can I also take next week off? Or, better yet, are we going to New York?" Rachel gasped. " _Are_ we going to New York? Did you change your mind and you're letting me come with you on your _business trip?"_ The teen questioned, air quoting the business trip part.

Shelby rolled her eyes while opening the door to exit the building for the both of them. "No to Chicago, no to London, and like I already told you kid, absolutely not to New York."

"But _mooom_ , why not?" Rachel whined, her attention already reverted back to the phone screen.

 **Rachel:** _Don't think I can come over tn :( my mom is taking me hostage, guess we're going out of town for the weekend but let's meet in the choir room Monday morning?_

"Because your dads and I don't want you missing any school, and I am not going for fun, Rach. I'll be gone for four days for business and to take some meetings with Marty. We can go back together in the summer. I promise."

"You mean when you come watch me perform at Nationals after we beat you and VA?"

 **Quinn:** _For sure! Have fun with Shelby!_

Shelby suppressed a smirk from forming at the retort though an unsettled feeling cut in momentarily. With Regionals coming up, she needed to find a way to focus on maintaining a healthy competition between the two of them. Bantering was fine, but she wanted to also keep things respectable. She had to set an example. Rise above.

"In your dreams, kid," she stuck her tongue out at her. Eh. Rising was for losers. "You don't even know what's coming. What random lesson is Schuester teaching you all now? Also, I refuse to make you another Lady Gaga costume. It took me _hours_ last week."

"Mom!" Rachel exclaimed passionately in objection. "Stop, you're being unfair."

"How am I being unfair?" The coach snickered in amusement. "My team and I have been in morning and evening practices since the beginning of the month. We were also in rehearsals during break. Preparation wins championships, my dear. It's not my fault that you are all still just focused on having fun. Talk about _wrong_ directions, am I right?"

Rachel's eyes practically rolled to the back of her head, groaning. "You're so annoying."

"What was that, Rach? I can't hear you over the deafening cheers of my consecutive championship wins. Think I'm in for a… Three-Peat!"

"Mother!" The teenager glared. "You are incorrigible!"

"You started it!" Shelby retorted, dissolving into laughter as she pulled her pouting child over to her side, linking their arms together as they walked towards the car. "Can't wait to spend the _whole weekend_ together."

* * *

"Wait, but that was the exit to the airport," Rachel asked quizzically. "Where are we going? Why won't you tell me?"

"Well, we're going to stop in a little bit and get gas and then we'll get back on the road," Shelby informed, watching for her daughter's reaction through her periphery. "I was thinking we could spend the weekend up at the lake. Your grandma and grandpa co-own a summer home with the Fabrays. It's on the coast of Lake Erie, two hours north from here."

A gasp.

"What?" Rachel remarked, whipping her head to face her mother in total disbelief. "You're taking us… camping? _Outside?_ "

A shake of the head in response.

"No.. it's a lake house," Shelby replied, unfazed. " _Indoors_ surrounded by nature. You'll love it, Rach. It's too cold to swim or be out in the water but it's right by the State Park and if it's warm enough, we can go on a hike. There are even trails for you to run. It's beautiful out there and the house is very comfortable. Your grandpa and Russell spent a lot of time renovating it during the past couple of years. There's even… _Wi-Fi._ "

A grimace.

"I don't know," Rachel said skeptically. "I'm not really a fan of _the outdoors_ necessarily, won't there be bugs and stuff? Bears?"

A sigh.

"Can we skip and drive to Chicago instead for the weekend?" The teen pitched hopefully. "We can go shopping! I need a spring wardrobe."

Shelby smirked. Leave it to Hiram and LeRoy to raise a city kid through and through.

"Nice try, but no," she rejected the proposal. "We're going to the lake. And I promise that you'll enjoy it. If nothing else, we can just hang out and relax before we both go back to school on Monday. Get some peace and quiet. We can even talk."

"Oh," Rachel's face fell slightly, her smile faltering. "About what?"

Shelby hesitated to answer for a moment, deciding, trying to play her cards right. "Just more about how I'm going to _crush it_ at Regionals."

Rachel chuckled in relief and her grin returned. "I don't know about that. Need I remind you, mother, that you're going up against _me_ and what did you say to me when you first fake met me at the bookstore with Jesse? You said that I'm _extraordinary_ , remember?"

"That you are, my love," Shelby conceded with a firm nod. "But… I'd also say that you probably got that from me."

"Mom!"

"Love you, baby," Shelby winked, forever entertained by her teenager's whining. "Let me just stop and fill up the car and then we'll get back on the interstate."

"Sure," Rachel shrugged reluctantly as she eyed the GPS warily. "How far away did you say it was?"

"A little more than a hundred miles, so around two hours," the mother answered, picking up on the sudden shift of the mood, on her daughter's nerves. "But we can stop anytime you start to feel uncomfortable, Rach. I'm not in a rush, and I know that's a long time to be in the car, so if you're feeling a little overwhelmed, just let me know and we can make a pit stop. I don't mind."

"What?" Rachel replied, sincere shock settling across her features. "How did you know that's what I was thinking about? Did Dr. Montgomery tell you?"

"No, but I am your mom, hon," Shelby said softly with a worried sigh. "Of course I've noticed that you've been having some anxiety about driving in the car, and that makes sense Rach. There's nothing wrong with you. You and Jesse were in a very scary accident and it's absolutely normal to feel nervous about being in a car after that. I would be, but I think, I hope, it'll get better and easier as more time passes. But we can work on it together, my love. It'll be alright."

"Is that why we're going on a road trip?" Rachel questioned, shifting in her seat uncomfortably and absentmindedly adjusting her seatbelt. She didn't think that her apprehension had been that obvious. But she clearly couldn't keep much from her mother.

Shelby shrugged. "In part. We've also just been really busy. I don't know about you, but I feel like my feet haven't touched the ground in a while, so I also just wanted to spend some time together, just us, to decompress. And we also have the end of the school year coming up, Regionals, Nationals, Fran and Will's wedding, there's a lot ahead and I don't know when we'll get another chance to go away again, at least not until later on in the summer."

"Okay," Rachel nodded, buying into her mom's reasoning. Though she was living with the woman part-time now, they had both been rather preoccupied with a variety of things now that she thought about it. It was a nice idea to get away from it all, even for a little bit. "Yeah that sounds good. I mean I guess we were supposed to go on vacation together before this."

Shelby hummed in acknowledgement, wondering if she should make a foray into _that_ conversation. She and Hiram have been stumped on why their child has been acting cold and aloof toward her other father, and anytime they tried to bring it up, Rachel outright refused, brushed it off, or locked down immediately.

"I'm sorry that we couldn't go baby, I know you were looking forward to seeing your daddy."

The teenager only nodded. "It's okay, but are you sure you're okay with making a few stops if I start to feel weird?"

Shelby sighed internally at the diversion, but glad she was making headway with this particular problem at least. "More than okay, Rach. We can take it one step at a time until you gain more confidence being in the car. And I was thinking that maybe we just need to distract you too, get you out of your head a bit. How about you put together a playlist while I fill up? Or find a podcast for us to listen to?"

"Anything I want?" Rachel clarified, slowly beginning to relax.

"Whatever you want," Shelby agreed as she pulled into the gas station. She put the car in park and turned to regard her daughter seriously. "Or if you're really not up for it, then I can turn right back around and we can go back home. We can do whatever you need, my love. I don't want to do anything you're not comfortable with. I know I sprung this on you last minute."

Rachel leaned into her mother's touch when Shelby reached over to tuck her loose hair behind her ear. Her mom was a lot of things but the one she never failed to be was always considerate. Since they met, she's not once backed her into a corner, always providing her the driver's seat, always allowing her to set the pace. She'd never really realized how much flexibility her mother granted her until right now. Maybe it was time to start letting go of the wheel and meeting her halfway.

"No it's alright," she answered truthfully, tossing the woman an appreciative smile. "I'll be fine. I think we should go to the lake. See some bears… and lions… and tigers?"

"Oh my," Shelby responded appropriately with a shake of her head. "Your fathers really never took you camping or anything like that growing up?"

"Dad took me to Lincoln Park Zoo once to protest the cruel practice of caging animals for the public's entertainment. I was eight. Daddy had to come break us out of Zoo-jail."

"Well alright," Shelby laughed nervously, a bit unsure now for this particular adventure with her daughter. "Let us take you into the woods then where the wild things are… in Ohio."

* * *

Rachel Barbra Berry in nature was a concept. After a relatively problem-free car ride with fewer stops than she had anticipated, a demanded and thorough sweep of the lake house for any unwanted bugs, and a valiant attempt at a brief hike cut short by incoming storm clouds, they were back at the family cottage stranded for the time being due to the unexpected weather.

"Well I can definitely get behind camping if that's all it takes," Rachel commented brightly as she unbuckled her seatbelt. "Got my selfies on the beach. Tested these cute hiking boots you got me. I didn't get dirty. _And_ it only took us half an hour? Here for it."

Shelby couldn't help but laugh at the unexpected turn of events. A bit disappointed, but she also loved the thought of curling up by the fireplace and spending a quiet evening in their woodsy getaway on top of the water.

Purchased almost three decades ago and a constant project for her father to work on, the lake house was always a haven for her and her family and friends. It was elevated on a 60-foot setback and the L-shaped cottage had black siding to help it disappear into the trees. If they were on the water, the house sort of vanished into the darkness. Sometimes it felt like they were in a giant tree house.

In the living room, the 20-foot high wall of windows provided sweeping views of Lake Erie. Though her favorite fixture was always the Rumford-style fireplace, taller and shallower than most models, to help radiate heat into the cozy space.

The highlight of the kitchen and dining room area for her was the breakfast nook's awning windows that could be cranked open to let in the breeze in the cool summer evenings.

But as soon as the weather turned agreeable, they spent most of their time on the deck outside the living and dining rooms. She had convinced her dad and Russell to install frameless glass panels instead of railings last year, both for safety and to shield from wind blowing off the lake. But really, it created the best spot to watch sunsets since the glass didn't obscure the view.

She wasn't necessarily the camping type either but this space in the woods was always special to her. Maybe even more so now that she can share it with her daughter.

"You're right mom," Rachel admired the home when they pulled into the driveway completely. "It is really pretty out here. And kinda feels like we're the only ones left in the world, but in a good way. Maybe we can come back out here with everyone over the summer?"

"Of course we can," Shelby promised wholeheartedly. It was always a dream of hers to have her entire family here together, her daughter included. But for years, she never allowed herself to believe that it could ever happen, that it was even possible.

"Mom? Are you okay?"

Shelby blinked away her wandering thoughts and reverted her focus back to her reality. "Yeah baby, I'm okay," she offered a small grin. "Why don't you head inside, shower, then change into something more comfortable? I'll start the fire and make us some hot cocoa. Sound good?"

"Sounds perfect," Rachel agreed enthusiastically. "What are you going to do?"

"I'm just gonna call your grandpa in a sec and double-check to see if there's anything I need to do to prepare for this incoming storm," Shelby answered distractedly as she fished through her bag for her cell phone. "I don't really get good reception inside the house, so I want to catch him before I head in. Also your daddy texted while we were out. Do you want to give him a call now? He's just about to head to bed."

Rachel's posture stiffened quite obviously at the suggestion, her expression closing up. "No, it's okay. I'll just text him goodnight later."

Shelby sighed. "Baby, you should call your daddy. I know he hasn't heard from you all week, and he misses you."

"I've been texting him," the teenager shrugged, averting her mother's inquisitive gaze. "I'm not ignoring him."

"I didn't say that," Shelby proceeded with caution. "I… but what's going on, Rach? Did the two of you get into a fight? Are you mad at him about something? Or is it because he didn't come after the accident because you were the one who told him not to, hon, remember?"

"No," Rachel shook her head tersely. "We're fine. It's nothing. I don't want to talk about it mom, please? Can I just call him tomorrow? You just said he's going to bed."

Shelby hesitated. Her inclination was to let it go but that's what she always did when it came to these conversations with her daughter. She stopped tipping. She never rocked the boat. Treaded carefully. Backed off. But perhaps it was those habits that put them in the position they were in now in the first place. Even with the understanding that she could, the reality was, for whatever reason, her daughter didn't talk to her, couldn't talk to her—at least not without any prompting. It always took a breaking point for Rachel to open up and that was no longer working for her. It wasn't okay. And she didn't want to settle for that any longer because how was she supposed to help, if she didn't know how. Her sister was right. Maybe it was time to push.

"Rach," Shelby continued, choosing her words carefully. "You used to call your daddy every day, twice a day. You'd be so disappointed whenever he missed them, so I'm not buying that there's nothing going on, my love. What happened? Did your daddy say something to upset you?"

Rachel swallowed thickly, her good mood draining right out of her. "Mom, please, I don't want to talk about it. I'll call daddy later," she begged, finding herself getting angry. "It's not a big deal."

"I asked you a question Rachel, and I would really appreciate it if you'd answer me."

"Mom."

Shelby shrugged, unwilling to budge. She and Hiram couldn't allow their daughter to shut her other parent out of her life without an explanation. And they couldn't fix it, it they didn't know what the issue was. "Rachel, I only want to help."

The teenager crossed her arms defensively, irritation flaring inside of her. She didn't want to talk about it, why didn't her mother understand that. This was so unfair.

Shelby sighed again and unbuckled her own seatbelt, shifting to face her daughter with a stern expression. "I'll wait as long as I have to."

Rachel's forehead creased while indignation flitted across her face. "Fine," she relented, her tone clipped. "Since you want to know _so_ badly, I called daddy last week right before bed and he didn't pick up. But usually, if I fall asleep and then wake up during the night, I try again because I know it's morning in London and he's either getting ready for work or in his office. I called last Wednesday and someone else picked up his cell phone. That never happens, but he said his name was Paul and that daddy was still asleep. I asked who it was and he said he was his boyfriend. His boyfriend, mom. Daddy's seeing someone new already and he didn't even tell me," she said with a bite in her voice that made Shelby wince involuntarily. "He's been keeping it from me. From us. He's moving on, and he didn't even say anything. So please, tell me mom, how you can possibly help?"

Shelby blanched at the admission, completely unprepared for that news. She watched helplessly as Rachel's breathing became labored and her face began to crumble in on itself. "Oh Rach," she replied sadly. "I didn't—"

"There's nothing you can say," Rachel shook her head, swiping an angry hand across her eyes. "Just—I told you I didn't want to talk about it. I'm going inside."

Before her mother could even formulate a reply, she pushed the door open, not even caring that she was defenseless against the rapidly falling rain, and stormed towards and into the house.

* * *

A couple hours later into the evening, and after a few failed attempts to coax her daughter out of the guest room, Shelby sat alone in the living room, entirely lost in the sound of the rain thrumming against the roof and the crackling of the blazing fire in front of her.

The lights dimmed, she leaned her head back against the couch and watched the shadows from the fire dance among the ceiling beams.

She wanted her daughter to open up to her. More than anything. But at what cost? It seemed the more she pushed, the more Rachel resisted. She was running out of strategies and she was beginning, if not already, to sorely feel like a failure as a mother. Although she knew better than to compare experiences, she couldn't help it. Even when she was a teenager, even through all the angst, she had always turned to her parents for help. She went to her dad for advice. She sought out her mother for comfort. Voluntarily. Willingly. She never shut them out like this. Refused their help like this.

With a deep sigh of resignation, Shelby lifted her head, settling her sight on the antique chickering grand piano that her father painstakingly restored for her. Drawn, she rose to her feet and moved towards the piano and sat down, brushing the keys lightly. He had surprised her with it when she decided to move back to Ohio three years ago. A welcome-home gift. She spent a lot of her first summer back here at the lake. Playing music. Writing songs. Making plans and composing arrangements for her, at the time, new gig with the show choir team she was just asked to lead.

It was her therapy. It helped her reset. Maybe that's what she and Rachel needed. A do-over.

She glanced at the stairs momentarily before turning her focus back to the instrument in front of her. Without another thought, she began to play a piece that she composed that summer. One that she had never shared with anyone else before. She called it _Rachel's Melody_ , and it was the best, the most personal music she's ever done.

As a perfectionist, composing tended to be difficult for her; she always struggled to meet her own standards, to make it sound _perfect_ , just right. But with this piece, it took her one go. It just flowed right out of her. And the moment she played it, she couldn't find a single thing she wanted to change.

It was a true testament to the feelings she had towards her daughter, who, regardless of the distance or the _years_ spent apart, utterly and unconditionally owned her entire heart.

As Shelby played and reached someplace in the middle of the piece, she became aware of Rachel crossing the room and coming to stand behind her. She felt a hand on her shoulder and she scooted over in response to make room on the bench, continuing to play for a few minutes more. She never dreamed, either, that she'd ever get to play _this_ for her daughter.

"That was beautiful mom," Rachel whispered as she watched her mother's fingers move gracefully and effortlessly across the black and white keys, bringing the song to its soft ending. "It doesn't sound familiar. What were you playing?"

"Come here," Shelby urged, shifting and opening her arms up to her child. "I love you so much," she whispered back as she placed her cheek on top of her head.

"I love you too," Rachel melted. Her mother always had this effect on her. "I'm sorry."

"It's alright," she pulled her head back, her throat tightening at her daughter's poorly concealed reddened eyes and tear-stained cheeks. "Are you okay, baby?"

Rachel heaved a weary sigh while she stood up and transferred over to the couch. She waited for her mother to join her before answering.

"Did you know about daddy? About him dating someone else?"

Shelby settled down next to her kid and immediately enveloped her into her arms. Automatically, Rachel rested her head against her chest.

"No," she answered truthfully. "I had no idea, Rach. And if I had, I would have really encouraged your father to talk to you about it. But I truly did not know he was seeing someone. I am sorry, though, that you had to find out that way, hon."

"It's okay," Rachel said, hugging her tighter. "It's not your fault. I was just so blindsided. Again. I wasn't expecting it. But that's what they did last time, both dad and daddy just pretended like everything was okay until it wasn't, and then the next thing I knew they were getting a divorce and I didn't even see it coming. I just don't like that… not knowing. I hate it."

"I know, my love. That can't be easy."

"It's not," Rachel continued, finding that this was a lot easier to share once she started. "I just want them to be honest with me. They keep acting like I can't handle it or that I don't understand. But I'm not a baby anymore, they don't need to keep treating me like one."

"I think they just want to protect you, Rach," Shelby offered her perspective as a parent. "I don't think they're deliberately keeping things from you because they _want_ to. I think they're doing what they think is best for you, my love."

"It just sort of feels like they're lying to me though. There never used to be any secrets between the three of us. Now I feel like I'm on the outside all the time and that I'm always the last to know about things. It doesn't feel good."

Shelby bowed her head to place a kiss upon her daughter's long dark hair. "You know your dads, baby. I don't think that's their intention. But I do think if you tell them that that's how you feel, they'll act or make decisions differently. They love you, Rach. I think if you're honest with them about all of this, they'll fix it. They wouldn't want you feeling that way. I just don't think that they know."

"I know," Rachel agreed with a sigh. "I kind of told dad and he's been better lately. But I just miss daddy so much and I never want to bring it up on our phone calls. And then _Paul_ happened. What if, when I do ask, he lies to me about him?"

"I think you should give your daddy more credit than that," Shelby said, hoping she's hedging the right bet on LeRoy. "And even if he is dating Rach, I think he'll remind you that you're still the most important person in his life and that he will always be there for you."

"Maybe," the girl shrugged with uncertainty.

"No. Not maybe. Definitely," Shelby assured, changing her tune. It was LeRoy. He _loved_ their daughter and would put her first. Beyond a shadow of a doubt.

"Okay. I guess. Maybe I can talk to him about it tomorrow? I texted him earlier, like I said I would, and promised I'd call in the morning."

"I think that would be a good start, my love," Shelby encouraged. "And I'll be here the entire time if you want me to step in and tell your daddy what's been on your mind. But I do think that it's important he hears it from you. I know I would want to."

Rachel nodded and relaxed further into her mother's embrace, her stress over that situation slowly diminishing now that she had a plan. "Okay. Thanks mom."

"You don't always have to thank me," Shelby said, her voice trembling with unsettled emotions. "I know you don't necessarily want to talk about these things with me, and maybe I can't solve everything for you, in fact, I know I can't, but I'd at least like to try. I just… I'm your mom, Rach. I want to be there for you."

Rachel sat up and looked at her mother in the eyes, swept away by the sudden flash of pain and the rejection she saw in them. "Mom?"

Shelby mimicked Rachel's movements and also sat up straight. She dropped her head into her hands and ran her fingers through her hair listlessly. If she expected Rachel to open up to her, to be honest with her, to let her in, maybe it was only fair for her to do the same. If she wanted her daughter to lower down her walls, she could probably start with lowering down her own.

Unsure of and not liking what was happening with her mother, Rachel lifted her hand to rub the older woman's back in the same manner her mom has done for her so many times before. "Mommy, are you okay?"

Shelby inhaled a lungful of air before lifting up her misty gaze to lock onto her daughter's. "I know that you're trying, sweetheart. And I know that you're working on it. And I am so proud of you and of how far you and I have come in the last few months, but…" she swallowed, shaking her head, wracking her brain for the right words. "I know that you're still struggling to come to me for help. To even just come talk to me. And, I'm not angry baby, I know that maybe you can't help it, but you feeling like you can't come to me, Rachel, makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong. It makes me feel like you don't trust me. It makes me wonder... if we made the right choice."

"What choice?"

Shelby sighed. She had already leapt. "I don't know, if this was fair… for us, to have come in and interrupted your life this way."

Instant tears pooled in Rachel's wide brown eyes at the implication. "What? You mean you regret meeting me and choosing to be my mom?"

"No, Rachel," Shelby's heart dropped to her stomach. "Absolutely not," she backtracked. "Never. I… _no,_ never. I will _never_ regret that. But I just... I don't know, Rach. Everything's changed so much for you lately and I'm just worried about how much it's affecting you. I know that there isn't anything you can't handle, Rach. But I also just… I feel like you've been so unhappy lately too. And I.. I don't know if I'm doing this right or if I'm doing _enough_. I don't know if there's something that I'm missing or something that I'm not doing. I don't know if I'm helping you enough, or if you need more from me. But it really feels like I'm not, Rach. It feels like I'm… like I'm _failing_ you."

"Mom…"

"Sorry," Shelby sniffled, swiping the wetness away from her cheeks, embarrassed. "I'm sorry. But it's not your fault that I feel that way, Rachel," she said adamantly. "That's not, and will never, be on you. I just… I'm going to work through that too. In the same way that you are with everything. A lot of it is just me feeling insecure. And I… I only want to be the mom that you deserve, Rachel. More than anything else."

Without responding, Rachel only scooted over and pulled her mother's head down into her lap then started to stroke her hair slowly as she collected her thoughts. Relief washed over when she saw the older woman's features begin to calm.

"You're the best mom I could have ever asked for. You do help me. You take care of me all the time. You make things easier. And you always seem to know what I need before I even know what to ask for. I don't know if there's anyone out there that could be better than you. I don't think that you're failing. Remember? You're the one who told me that neither of us can be _bad_ at this because we're both still learning?"

Shelby chuckled lightly at the gentle chiding. She dropped her hand back down when she felt Rachel brush away her tears with a heartbreaking tenderness. "I'm sorry mom. I know I haven't made things any easier but I never wanted you to feel that way. I think you're amazing. You even made an Instagram for me just to help me feel better, and you swore that you would never do that. And you… you fix things for me all the time. I'm really sorry if I'm making you feel like I'm taking you for granted or something. I don't mean to."

"Rachel, no, baby, it's not your fault," Shelby shifted and moved to pull her child back into her arms again where she belonged. "Please don't apologize. I just… I wanted you to know how I feel. I want to be honest with you too."

Rachel felt her mother draw in a jagged breath and guilt twisted inside her stomach. She curled in closer. It was _definitely_ time to meet her halfway. "Mom?"

"Yeah, baby?" Shelby asked with a soft kiss to her daughter's temple.

"I can't talk to you," she began, in a struggle to almost say anything at all. "I can't talk to you because I'm afraid that you're also going to change your mind. About me. About us. About being my mom. I'm scared that you'll change your mind, and you'll leave me too."

"Rachel, I will _never_ change my mind about that. About you. That's not even a question," Shelby answered quickly; truly shocked she even had to say that aloud.

"But daddy did," Rachel pointed out, unable to hide the hurt in her voice. "He changed his mind. He left me. He left us. And now he's seeing someone. He's replacing us."

"Baby, that's _not_ what your father did. You know he had to move away for his job. And your dad and daddy's marriage just did not work out, and that's not on you. That has nothing to do with you, Rachel. At all. Sometimes, things between two people, even if they do love each other, just don't work out. That was not your daddy or your dad changing either of their minds about you or your family."

"I know mom," Rachel accepted, though still frustrated, still confused. She untangled herself from her mother, gathering her wayward thoughts. "I know. Dr. M already told me that it's not my fault, and I understand that. I do. More than I did before. But it's just how I feel and I can't help it."

"Rachel…"

"I don't know. Everything's just different. Everything's changing. Everything has changed. And sometimes it's okay, but sometimes it's overwhelming. And a lot of the times, I don't really know what to do."

Shelby felt a pang in her chest at the look of defeat written all over the girl's face. She reached out, drawing her child in for a hug and then further onto her lap.

"You let me help you," she suggested, enclosing her arms around her baby. "We figure it out, together."

"But it's my problem. Everyone else seems to be moving on just fine. I don't know why I can't... but I think I can work it out. I think I just need more time. I don't know. I'm sorry, mom. I guess I'm just not as okay with everything like I thought I was, but I'll get over it. It's fine."

While she had little doubt that her daughter could and would "figure it out" eventually, she hated that her child thought that she had to do it by herself. That she had to shoulder it all herself. "Rachel?"

"Hmm?" She peeked up to meet her mother's eyes, which this time, were bright and clear. Determined.

"Just because you carry it all so well, my love, does not mean that it's not heavy. Let me help you."

Rachel felt her mother's arms wrap around her even tighter in a way that made her feel as though they'd always be around to catch her. Maybe she could do better than halfway. "Okay," she finally complied, hesitant, but willing to try. "I think you're right. I think I need you mom."

"I know I need you, Rachel."

* * *

 **A/N: Thanks for joining me for another one! Next chapter — When Coach Corcoran goes away, the New Directions and Vocal Adrenaline kids come out to play. A poem, by pomatterpie**


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